He sighs and runs his free hand over his jaw. “You gonna tell me what happened.?”
Moisture springs to my eyes and I look away, “So many things are wrong,” I say softly, letting the ice pack fall from my face.
“Tess, look at me.”
With tears falling, I look down and focus on the pillow on my lap, unable to look at him. I’m too scared he’ll read my thoughts. I sniffle and wipe the tears away with the back of my sleeve.
“Tess, look at me,” he demands softly, and I slowly raise my head until my eyes meet his. “If you’re in some kind of trouble, you can tell me, I promise I won’t say a thing.”
I inhale deeply, trying to steady my breathing. “Not even to Blaze?” I question, and he gets up and heads to the kitchen to get a box of tissues then sits back down beside me, handing me the box.
“Tess, if you don’t want me to say anything to Blaze, I won’t. But you gotta let me help you. This is not like you, it must be big, whatever it is.”
I nod. “It is, Jeff. It is.” I break down and start crying as memories of my life with Viper flood my mind. I cry for all those nights that Viper hit me, for the nights he raped me, and most of all, for the father who never loved me, who thought I deserved all the abuse I received.
“Shush,” Jeff soothes as he wraps his large arms around me and I cry into his chest, letting all my pain melt into my tears. For three years I’ve had to keep silent, had to pretend I didn’t have a past, that I had no parents, but now I can’t hold it in anymore. I need to tell someone, and that someone is going to be Jeff.
Blaze
“Hey, man, you got a sec?”
Tracker looks at me from the bar, taking a swig from his beer. He places it back on the bar and turns to face me. “Sure, what is it, brother?”
I look around the club; some members are playing pool, some are just hanging out with their women. “Not here, meet you in the garage.”
Trackers eyebrows lift. “Okay, everything all right?”
I scratch my jaw. “Hope so, brother, hope so.”
He nods, clearly understanding my mood, and pushes himself off the bar. “Let’s go.”
We walk out of the clubhouse and head toward the garage. Luckily there are no brothers hangin’ around. I open the fridge we have in there and grab myself a beer. “Want one?” I ask, looking over at Tracker while holding the door open.
“Yup.”
I grab two Coronas then shut the fridge with my boot and place them both on the workbench. I grab my bottle opener and remove both their caps. “Here you go, brother.” I hand Tracker his beer then take a huge swig of mine.
Tracker eyes me the whole time. “You okay? What’s going on?”
I swallow hard then wipe my mouth with the back of my hand. “What I’m going to ask you is not easy for me to say.”
Tracker leans up against a bike that’s getting its oil changed—looks like Gunner’s bike—and his eyes pinch together as they stare into mine. “You have my attention.”
I blow out a breath and place my beer on the workbench. “I need you to run a check on someone, hermano.”
Tracker runs his thumb over his bottom lip. “Is that it, bro? I thought you were gonna tell me something bad, like you’re going nomad.” He laughs, but then straightens when he sees that I’m not smiling back. Instead I frown and rub the back of my neck. “Who is it?” he almost whispers.
I chew at my bottom lip and kick at an imaginary rock. “Who is it, brother?” he asks again. My stomach rolls; I feel sick and sweat covers my forehead. What the fuck am I doing? How can I do this to Tess?
I almost take the coward’s way out and not say anything, but something inside of me flicks like a switch and I realize that I have no other choice. Tess hasn’t given me one.
I take in a breath and look Tracker straight in the eye. “Tess, man. It’s Tess.”
Tracker’s eyebrows raise. “Sorry, man. I thought I heard you say Tess?”
I grab my beer from beside me and take another swig. “I did, brother,” I finally say, adding, “I need you to do a background check on her.”
Tracker places his beer on the floor then steps toward me. “You know what you’re doin’, right? If Tess finds out about this—”
“I know!” I bark out, halting his words. “You think I didn’t think about this? And how it could ruin us? I’ve tried to talk to her, find out about her past, but fuck me, Tracker, she won’t open up. All I know is her mother died at childbirth, and her father is MIA.”
“So maybe her past is a shit one and she doesn’t want to talk about it, ever thought of that, brother?” Tracker says slowly, pointing to his temple like I’m a fucking idiot.
I get up in his face. “I know what I’ve fuckin’ thought, I’m not a dumb fuck,” I spit out.
“Then why? Why dig into her background?”
I turn away, looking over at the pictures of Harleys on the garage wall, sadness filling me. “Because, brother,” I say, defeated, “I’ve asked her to marry me and she said no… twice.”
I hear Tracker blow out a breath. “Fuck, man, I’m sorry.”
My head snaps back toward him. “I don’t want your pity, I want you to look into her life, see what you can find. Don’t care what shit you come back with, I just want to know everything. You got me, brother?”
Tracker stares at me for a while then nods. “Okay, man, if that’s what you want.”
I don’t hesitate, I just stare back at him and confirm, “It’s what I want.”
He turns and picks up his beer, taking another swig, still looking at me intently. “I’m assuming you want intel ASAP.”
I bring my bottle up to my lips and swallow the remainder of the beer in it. “As soon as you can, I need to know what she’s hiding.”
“What makes you think she’s hiding anything?”
“Just a gut feelin’, that’s all,” I reply. “So, you’ll do it?”
“Yeah, man, anything for a brother. Just one thing, though.”
I tense at Tracker’s serious tone. “Yeah?”
“If she finds out you did this…. There may be no turning back, man.”
I feel my heart ache at his words, because it’s true, I know this could end us. Tess would never forgive me for doing this if she ever found out, it means I don’t trust her. But she’s also given me no choice, I have to do this.
I nod at Tracker, my voice thick with emotion when I say, “I know, brother. Just do it.”
He nods back at me. “Give me a day.”
“Done.”
Blaze
I walk out the garage, leaving Tracker to his thoughts about what I’ve asked him to do. I feel shit as it is, I don’t need to see Tracker’s disappointment in me any longer. What’s done is done, and that’s it.
He said to give him a day—a whole fucking day. I know it doesn’t seem long to wait, but I need to know, the suspense is killing me. And if Tracker comes back with nothing, then I’m gonna tell Tess once and for all that if she doesn’t want me as her man and husband, then it ain’t gonna work. If I can’t have all of her, then I can’t have her at all. Even though it would kill me to, I have to let her go. Love just isn’t gonna be enough anymore, I want her forever.
My phone rings just as I light up a smoke, so I place it in my mouth, letting it hang at the edge of my lips while I pull the phone out of my back pocket. I answer when I see Luisa’s name flash up.
“Hey, darlin’.”
“Blaze!” she says, panic filling her voice.
I remove my cigarette with my spare hand and blow out smoke. “Yeah, it’s me. What’s wrong?”
“It’s Tess.”
A chill runs through me, terrible thoughts about what Lu is calling about immediately coming to my mind. I take a deep breath to calm myself; it could be nothing. “What about her, Lu?”
“Is…. Is she with you?”
“With me?” I ask, looking around the parking lot of the compound. I see her car here, but it�
�s been here all day; she went in Lu’s car. “Didn’t you drive?”
“I did… but….”
I take another deep breath, trying to fight down the rising feeling of panic. “Lu, calm the fuck down and just tell me what’s happening.”
“Well… she has just vanished, Blaze!”
Throwing my cigarette on the ground, I stride quickly over to my bike and straddle it, my gut churning now. “Tell me everything,” I growl down the phone, already fishing in my pocket for my keys.
I hear her sniffle then, “We were having coffee in town, then she said she needed to go to the bathroom. A while passed so I went to see if she was okay, but the door was locked. So I spoke to her through the closed door, and she said she wasn’t feeling well but would be out in a second.”
“Where are you now?” I growl.
“I’m in my car, in front of the cafe.”
“What’s the name of the café?” I stab the key for my bike into the ignition but hold off starting her up, needing to hear Lu clearly so I don’t miss a single important detail.
“Give me a sec,” she says, then, “It’s… um, Lorenzo’s, on Seymour Street.”
“So what happened after she said she’ll be out?” I close my eyes, trying to stay calm and listen.
“Well, I left her and went to sit back down. A few minutes passed, so I went back, and the door was unlocked, but then I noticed she wasn’t in there anymore. I panicked then because I didn’t see her leave, and she would have told me if she was, and I tried to call her and she didn’t answer….”
“What do you mean?” I ask, getting impatient now. I hear what Lu’s saying but it doesn’t make any fucking sense.
“She’s not in the bathroom, she’s not inside the café, she just left without telling me.”
“Hold up, she just left without saying a word?” That’s not something Tess would do, especially to a friend.
“Yeah, odd, right?”
“Yeah, fuckin’ odd. Did you try and call her?”
“Yes, I already told you that, but it went straight to voicemail.”
“Try again!” I demand, rubbing the back of my neck. “Sorry, Lu. Didn’t mean to yell.” Frustration and worry are rolling off me now, I need to calm the fuck down.
“It’s okay, you’re worried,” Lu says, and I can hear worry in her voice as well, which was not helping.
“Yeah, I am. I’m gonna go now, see if she’ll pick up my call.”
“Okay, I’ll send her a text, see if she’ll respond.”
“Good idea. Stay where you are, I’m heading there.”
“Okay, I’ll see you soon,” Lu says.
I end the call from Lu and immediately dial Tess’s number, but she doesn’t answer, and it goes to voicemail after a few rings. Not leaving a message, I curse and shove my phone inside a pocket of my jacket. Grabbing my helmet, I put it on then start up my engine. Tess, where the fuck are you? I curse again before I take off toward the café.
Lu’s car is parked not far from the café. I park my bike behind her, and she gets out of her car and walks toward me.
Once I take off my helmet, she smiles. “She texted me, she’s okay.”
Relief fills me and I run my hand through my hair. “So, where is she?”
Lu shrugs. “She wouldn’t say, just that she’s okay but not feeling the best.”
“Not feeling the best? Where the fuck would she go, if she’s not at the club?” I’m happy that Lu heard from Tess, but the whole disappearing thing still doesn’t make any sense and is sitting heavy in my gut.
Luisa shrugs again. “If it’s any consolation, she said she’ll call me later.”
I bang my helmet on my handlebars. “Fuck!” Luisa steps back at that, a flicker of terror in her eyes. “I’m sorry, Lu, I didn’t mean to scare you.”
She steps back toward me and places her hand on mine. “I don’t know what’s going on with you two, but fix it, Blaze, find our girl. She was off today.”
I inhale deeply and drop my gaze to the ground. “Yeah, seems we’re both havin’ a bad day.”
“What do you mean?”
Her voice is gentle, encouraging me to open up, and without thinking, I blurt out, “I asked her to marry me, Lu.”
Luisa smiles widely and leans in, hugging me and causing me to let go of my helmet. I hug her back, then she shoots her head up and back, her eyes narrowing as she looks at me. “Wait. If you asked her to marry you, why didn’t she tell me? Why are we not celebrating right now?”
I laugh bitterly, then sigh. Luisa lets go of me and tilts her head to one side. “She said yes, right?” I don’t reply. I can’t lie. “Blaze? She’s gotta say yes.”
“Yeah, well. That’s what I said.”
Luisa gasps then covers her mouth with her hand. She slowly removes it after a few moments, her disbelief coming through when she hesitantly asks, “She said no?”
“Yup, seems like she doesn’t want to marry me.” I shrug my shoulders, trying to act nonchalant when it still feels like I’ve been kicked in the gut every time I think about it.
Shaking her head, she says, “No, she loves you! Of course she’d want to marry you.”
“I guess not.” I explain further, “It’s the second time I’ve asked her to marry me, Lu. A guy takes the hint after the second time.”
Moisture fills her eyes. “Oh, Blaze. I’m so sorry.”
She leans in and hugs me again, and after a brief moment I grasp her arms and pull her back. “It’s okay, I guess she just doesn’t love me enough,” I mumble, defeat leeching into my voice.
A hard slap lands on my shoulder and I cover the sting with my hand. “What was that for?”
“Because, dummy, she loves you. Of course you’re enough.” I can almost hear the eye roll in Lu’s voice, but she’s looking at me with a gentleness that threatens to unravel me.
“Yeah, well, I mustn’t be, because there’s only so much rejection a man can take.”
She places her hands on her hips, and the eye roll manifests this time. “Blaze, when Hawke asked me to marry him, of course I had doubts—but, I knew deep in my heart that he was it for me. Maybe Tess just needs time.”
I frown. “You think? Even though it’s been a year since I asked her the first time? How much more time does she need?”
Lu’s hand moves from her hip to my shoulder, giving it a squeeze. “Look, I don’t know much about Tess, but I know she grew up without a mom. This is all new to her, give her time, Blaze. She loves you, though, I do know that for sure.”
I look away, up at a café sign nearby, wanting to change the subject. All this feelings shit is hard, and I just can’t think about all the rest right now, not when I need to find out where the fuck she is.
“This it?” I ask, tilting my head toward the café.
She looks at the café, too. “Yeah, this is where we were.”
“Let’s go in.” I raise myself off my bike and sit my helmet on the handlebars.
When we walk into the café, Luisa points to a table. “That’s where we were sitting.”
I look over to where she’s pointing then to my right, noticing a hallway that leads to the restrooms. “That the bathroom she was in?” I nod in the direction of the hallway.
She nods. “Yeah, that’s it.”
I walk that way and knock on the ladies’ bathroom door once I’m standing outside. Nobody replies after a few seconds, so I open it hesitantly and poke my head inside. “Anyone in here?” Again, no response, so I enter the small, tiled room, Luisa following close behind me. I look around the plain but clean area, and my eyes immediately zero in on a few dots of something crimson on the floor. Is that fucking blood? I walk over to it and crouch down, then touch my finger to it and bring it up to my nose to smell. The tacky feel of it is almost enough to confirm my suspicions, but the coppery scent acknowledges that without a doubt it’s blood on the floor of the café’s ladies’ bathroom. The very same bathroom Tess was in not too long ago. Is it T
ess’s?
I rub my fingers together, then look at Lu, whose eyes are wide, her face pale in the dim lighting. “Please tell me it’s not blood?”
I nod, fear filling me at a rapid rate. If Tess was bleeding—and that’s if it is Tess’s blood, which my gut is screaming that is is—why did she run? “It is,” I say, standing upright again. I move over to the sink and turn on the tap to rinse the blood off my finger.
“Maybe she had a blood nose?”
I turn and stare at Lu, one eyebrow raised. “Something tells me that’s not what happened here.” I then notice something on the tiled wall just behind Lu and walk over to it—it’s a strand of hair, caught on the sharp edge of a broken tile. I pull at it until it’s free and bring it up closer to my eyes. The color and length is about the same as Tess’s, and my hand starts to shake, the single strand wavering and catching the light of the cheap fluorescents.
I look at Lu, her fear now evident from the tears pooling in her eyes. She cups her mouth with both hands, holding in a sob. “Oh God, Blaze. Someone has taken her.”
I nod, staring down at the proof pinched between two of my fingers. “Either that or she escaped from someone. Tell me exactly what her text said.”
She walks up to me and holds out her phone. I read the words on the screen; it’s exactly what Lu said, that she’s fine, and she’ll be in contact with Lu.
But what if she didn’t write the text? I grab my phone from my back pocket and dial Prez’s number, and he picks up on the first ring. “What’s up.”
“Prez, I need your help.” I try to keep the tremor out of my voice but can’t.
Quill doesn’t hesitate to respond. “Anything, brother. What is it?”
I explain to Quill the day’s events, and what I’d found in the restrooms. Being the man Quill is, he’s on top of it right away. “You need the brothers to help with findin’ her?”
“Yeah, Prez, I do. It’s not like her to go missing. I’m gonna go see if she’s at her shop, can you have a couple of brothers checking the local hospitals, see if she’s there?”
“Sure, man, we find anything, we’ll call right away.”
Tess Property of Blaze: Book #5 in the Blood Brothers MC Series Page 7
