Clandestine Angel

by Kate Hall

  Copyright © 2019 Kate Hall

  This edition published 2019

  Cover Art © 2019 Kate Hall

  Published by Lost Window Publishing

  Neosho, Missouri

  United States

  All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without permission from the publisher, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law. For permissions contact:

  LostWindowPublishing@gmail.com

  eBook ISBN:978-1-950291-14-4

  Jacket Design by Kate Hall

  Interior Design by Kate Hall

  Chapter One

  Flying is the best feeling in the universe.

  I use my iridescent white wings to shoot myself up as high as I can, and then tumble back down, the clouds cool as the water vapor soaks into my wings, getting down beneath the feathers. My nearly white hair whips around me wildly, and I close my eyes. The rush of the free fall causes my heart to race. Just as I exit the clouds that constantly surround Theaa Academy, though, I unfold my wings, and they catch me like a parachute, glistening water droplets shaking from them with the sudden pressure.

  I laugh and climb back up, higher and higher until the towering marble academy is a mere speck below me. From there, I glide, the wind ruffling me and my feathers. Logically, the air should be thin and suffocating this high up, unable to hold the weight of my body, but this is Heaven, and the laws of physics don’t apply to Angels unless we want them to.

  I allow myself to glide down in a lazy spiral, shifting my muscles and flight feathers subtly to get the best landing position. When I land, my bare toes embedding in the silky-soft and perfectly green grass, Nicolai, one of my closest friends, scowls at me.

  I don’t blame him. I got my wings mere weeks into our first term as students at Theaa Academy, a school that teaches angels to fight demons in the eternal war between Heaven and Hell. My experience wasn’t the norm, though. Nicolai has only had his wings for a week, having gotten them in the ritual that all students are supposed to participate in at the end of their first term.

  “It’s hard to figure out,” I insist, but my words don’t seem to make him feel any better. It had taken me months to be able to fly this well, and I’m still not nearly as good as Huỳnh or Gabe, the first friends I made here. Any reassurances they’d made hadn’t made me feel better, either, so his unenthusiastic response isn’t surprising.

  He runs his hands through his snow-white hair in frustration. “I just don’t understand how I can’t do it. I got the top grade in our Intro to Flying class!”

  I roll my eyes at him, but I’d been the same way when I was first learning to fly. It took me months of practice to get where I am now, and I’m still not as precise as the older students.. “You’ll get it,” I promise. I hold my hands out, and he takes them half-heartedly. I walk him through the first steps yet again, and he actually manages to get a few feet off the ground for just an instant. When his pace falters, I tighten my grip on his hands and lower him gently to the ground. “See? That’s already better.”

  I take off back into the air. I shouldn’t be showing off, but I can’t help it. More than any other part of Heaven, flying is absolutely magical. It takes my breath away every time, and I feel like I’m on an impossible high whenever I take to the stars. Night is my favorite time to fly. As the sun sinks through the clouds on the horizon, I inspect the golden and pink light filtering through, bringing the castle to light almost like it’s on fire.

  “Hey!” Nicolai shouts from the ground, and then he flaps his brand-new wings. He gets the lift needed, but he doesn’t have the balance to stay in the air for long, so he lands on his butt after a five-foot fall.

  I laugh and swoop by him, and he grimaces.

  And then, as happens every time I think too much about my happiness, the guilt creeps in. I’m not supposed to be here. Or, according to Death, I am supposed to be here, but only because I took someone’s place.

  And that someone is my girlfriend and true love, who is now trapped back at Daemaac Academy, a school for demons in Hell.

  I grimace and dive back to the ground. Lately, I’ve been practicing a new move, which Huỳnh has been trying to teach me. I’m supposed to swoop down and then shoot back up a few feet, using my wings to hold me in the air as I float down gracefully. I don’t land nearly that well this time, instead stumbling and planting my face in the dirt, but at least I don’t tumble over the mountainside like I did earlier in the week. If anyone had seen that, I’d probably have gotten my Angel card revoked.

  “That makes me feel better,” Nicolai says with a giggle. He and I were on awkward terms for a little while last term, mainly because he kissed me and I was not even slightly into it, but we’re back to our usual friendly banter at this point. The kiss has basically been forgotten.

  “You know, you should be thanking me. Not everyone in our term gets a private tutor with the kind of experience I have.” I raise an eyebrow, but, to nobody’s surprise, he just laughs at my comment.

  “Right. Experience,” he says. Then, he swipes a finger over my nose. “And this is just an accessory?” He holds up the finger for me to inspect the clump of dirt sitting atop.

  I roll my eyes and wipe my face with my hands, but they’re dirty, too. I’ve probably just made it worse. Who knew that ethereal beings could get dirty?

  “Incoming!” comes a shout from somewhere high above us. Nicolai and I step out of the way just as Huỳnh and Gabe simultaneously perfect the same maneuver I just completely screwed up.

  “That’s how you do it,” Nicolai says, gesturing at them. “It’s not even that hard!”

  I glare at him, perfectly aware that the mud on my face will soften the look. “And would you like to demonstrate it for us? I’ll give you a hint: you have to be at least fifty feet up to start it.”

  He sticks his tongue out at me, and I laugh at his scrunched-up face.

  “What are we talking about?” Gabe asks, tossing an arm over each of us. He’s in his fifth and final term at Theaa Academy. After this, he’ll get to move to his permanent home in Heaven, and he’ll only be called upon when he’s needed. According to Azrael, it’s at least a hundred or so years before most angels get called to action. There just isn’t nearly as much demonic activity on Earth as there used to be, and, with the constant growth of Heaven, there are always more angels than are needed.

  “How much Nicolai sucks at flying,” I say. As Nicolai is about to protest, Huỳnh puts an arm around his other shoulder so we form a line.

  “Awe, he’s just a little tiny baby angel,” she says in a cooing voice. His eyebrows scrunch together, and he frowns. We all laugh a little at his expense, and, after a moment of pouting, he joins our laughter. For someone who used to be a violent Russian gangster, Nicolai is always fairly good-humored. Heaven does that to people.

  “Just wait,” he says. “Once I figure out how to get in the air and stay there, it’s over for you bitches.”

  I snort. “Sure. Let me know when that happens. Should I hold my breath?”

  We walk back inside together. Tiffany, a term three student like Huỳnh, has a movie night planned for tonight, and we’re all invited. Apparently, there’s a huge entertainment center available at the dorms, similar to the magically-expanding bedrooms. Instead of containing beds and desks and closets, though, these rooms are made to entertain up to fifty students at once. Depending on what students want, there can be pools, tennis courts, and sometimes, like tonight, movie theaters with big fluffy floor pillows, always-full hot cocoa, and magically-appearing popcorn.

  I get changed into a new set of pajamas—not the old ratty ones like my old pair from Earth, but a unicorn onesie.

  I meet Huỳnh at the magical entertain
ment center door after we get changed into our pajamas.

  I open my mouth to tell her about the note Desireé left me, the one I keep in the cubby I made for her, but I can’t bring myself to get the words out. Maybe I’ll tell her tomorrow. That’s what I told myself yesterday, though. For now, though, I want to keep Desireé’s promise all to myself.

  Avery,

  I will be long gone by the time you read this.

  I love you.

  I’m okay.

  I will find you again.

  Desireé.

  Chapter Two

  When classes start up again for my second term, I’m curious yet unenthusiastic about the final class on the list. I space out during most of my other classes. I only have one martial arts course, and it’s split by weapons now that we’re past our initiation. I have a sword, so I’m in a class of mixed terms with other students that carry bladed weapons. Nicolai received a staff as his weapon at the end of last term, so he’s in a different class than me. At least Huỳnh is here, and we chat before Gabriel, the famous Archangel and my fencing teacher from last term, comes in from his previous course. I avoid his eye contact, lest he figure out how uneasy he makes me. If any of the Archangels discover that I freed a demon instead of killing her, there will be serious consequences. I don’t want to discover what those consequences are.

  By the time I’m ready for my final class of the day, just after Advanced Enochian, my hands are practically shaking and sweating.

  Demon Tracking and Awareness. I’ve had enough experience with demons to last an eternity.

  Gabriel is standing at the front of the classroom when we walk in.

  “Take your seats quickly,” he says as we filter in. As he did in Fencing last term, Nicolai takes his place right beside me. His presence is comforting, and I try to focus on anything besides Gabriel, who has never seemed to trust me since I was found in my dorm with Desireé last term. Instead of an open room with space to use our weapons, there are thick textbooks and rows of neat desks.

  As soon as everyone has sat down, Gabriel begins to speak, not even giving us a chance to absorb the new environment.

  “Welcome to Demon Tracking and Awareness,” he says, crossing his muscled arms and leaning against his desk. His black hair flops over his dark olive-toned forehead, and his eyes trace over each student as he says this. His golden-white wings are spread out behind him, taking up most of the front of the classroom.

  I smile to myself when I look around to avoid his eye contact. I’m the only student here who doesn’t have to wear a leather harness to contain my wings, as I’d been forced to wear it when I killed a demon and my wings sprouted prematurely at the beginning of last term.

  “This will be the first of many field classes you’ll be taking throughout your time at Theaa Academy. That means that, aside from classwork and assignments, we will be going to Earth to study demonic signs and track down demons.” His eyes darken, and he frowns. “These are not childish field trips, and you are to listen to everything I say. Just as we can track them, demons are able to track down angels. You all have weapons now, and you will learn to summon them in your weapons classes before we begin our field work. You will need them.”

  Earth? We’re going back to Earth? Gabriel’s little speech sends a murmur through the room.

  I swallow and straighten, and I’m not the only one who fidgets at this news. Since our deaths, we’ve only been to Earth once, and it was to hide out in a musty warehouse and kill the demons for our initiation.

  Except what Gabriel doesn’t know is that I didn’t kill my demon. Instead, I’d helped free her.

  “Yes, Daniel?” he asks, looking at someone sitting behind me. I glance back, and Daniel, an indigenous American boy who I shared a few classes with last term, messes with his long braid, which is pale like the rest of the young angels’ hair. His is a strawberry blonde, so I assume it used to be black like Huỳnh’s. Mine used to be dark blonde, so it’s almost all the way white now. I haven’t asked Nicolai what his looked like, but based on the brighter sheen, it had probably been perfectly blonde.

  “Are we going to be fighting demons?” Daniel asks nervously.

  We all watch Gabriel expectantly. This is the question that’s on all our minds. The hairs raise up on the back of my neck. How many people are looking at me, the only person here who’s supposedly killed multiple demons? It’s a lie, though.

  He shakes his head. “Most likely not. I ask that you have access to your weapons as a precaution, but it’s very unlikely you will actually encounter a demon in person this term. And even if you do, you are less likely to have to fight it. We almost always try to capture the demons we find for future initiations.”

  Goosebumps rise on my arms, and I grind my teeth. Desireé had been one of the demons used for the initiation ceremony. If I hadn’t been there, someone else probably would have killed her. I briefly wonder about the hundred or so extra demons that had been in cages, though. There had been far too many for our initiation alone. Why do the angels keep so many locked up when there are clearly more than we need? I frown at the insinuation.

  When we’re finally let go for the day, I leap out a window, taking to the skies. Up here, I can breathe, and I don’t feel like I’m being watched. All flying students are allowed to visit extra corridors of Heaven, but I haven’t visited the city from our first visit outside the academy since our after-exam trip last week. I can’t stand to see all those happy people, living in a blissful eternity that Desireé and I will never have together. If I go there alone, I just might break down.

  Instead, I fly up and up and up, as far as my wings will carry me until I find one of the many floating mountains that dot Heaven. They’re mostly unoccupied, and I lie at the top, spreading my wings and arms out behind me, relishing in the biting snowflakes against my hot, exhausted skin.

  If I could stay up here forever, I would. This high, the stars are out even though the sun hasn’t begun to set.

  I unfold the note that I carried to class with me today. It had been a risky move, but I felt better having it on me. I reread the last line over and over again.

  I will find you again.

  The words are becoming smudged, mainly because I can’t help but hold the note nearly constantly, opening and closing it several times a day and reading it obsessively.

  I will find you again.

  How will Desireé find me if she’d get killed at the slightest hint of her survival? Azrael told me that angels and demons who are killed go to purgatory, but I haven’t actually found any information about what it’s like there. Whatever it is, it must be worse than Hell. If it wasn’t, demons wouldn’t work so hard to avoid going there.

  I frown, and then let out a frustrated groan. What am I supposed to do?

  How am I supposed to make everything okay? If I can’t be happy in Heaven, then there’s absolutely no hope for me.

  Chapter Three

  My first term at Theaa Academy, there had been two demon attacks on the school. I’d only seen one demon each time, but there had been more that the Archangels and upperclassmen were fighting. As an upperclassman, Gabe had been involved, but he’s never said anything about it, not even when Huỳnh or I badger him about it.

  I’d killed the first demon when it attacked me, a feat that had shocked everyone, even the archangel Azrael. I hadn’t even known that was something I was capable of doing. That was how I got my wings.

  The second demon had been Desireé. She’d showed up at my room, and, until then, I hadn’t even remembered her existence. Azrael told me it had been a trick, a curse altering my memory, but Cain, also known as Death, had confirmed my suspicions that our love had been real.

  There haven’t been any more demon attacks since Desireé showed up, and those were both fairly early in my first term. The other students seem to think that the breach had been discovered, but I know the truth. I see it in Azrael’s eyes every time she looks out the windows.

  The Archa
ngels have no idea how the demons got in, and it’s only a matter of time before it happens again.

  Chapter Four

  It’s the middle of dinner when a boom shakes the school.

  We all pause, and I look up to Azrael, our headmaster who has taken me under her wing. Figuratively rather than literally. I thought she would look confident, but she looks…scared. It’s a moment before she reacts, her eyes filled with fear for just an instant, although the other teachers have already sprung into action.

  “Fourth and Fifth terms, at your posts,” Gabriel calls, stretching his hand out and summoning his double-ended scythe. When will I learn to do something like that? We still haven’t gotten to that point in our weapons class, although Huỳnh has assured me that it’s a fairly simple spell. For now, though, I’ve been lugging my silver sword to class in its opal sheath every day.

  Gabe leaps away from the table and into the air, the draft from his powerful wings scattering food everywhere.

  He glances at Huỳnh and frowns, hesitating for just an instant before following Gabriel and the other Archangels out the window.

  “It’s going to be alright,” I assure Huỳnh and Nicolai, who are staring out the window in shock. I’ve been involved in two of these attacks so far, and nobody has gotten hurt either time. Well, nobody other than me, but I wasn’t supposed to be there. And, despite all the odds, I’d survived the first one. “They’ll keep the demons away from the mess hall.”

  Conveniently, though, my sword is strapped at my waist from class earlier. I draw the weapon out and go to the window. I know I’m in no way qualified to defend anyone, as I’m just a second-year with a term of fencing and a week of actual sword training, but I feel the need to do something. I can’t just sit around while the others are out there fighting demons. I may be in love with one, but I’d been brutalized and nearly killed by another. I’m not taking the chance that one gets in and kills Huỳnh or Nicolai—or anyone else, for that matter.