Chaotic Anger: The Seven MC Book 1

by Breck, A. R.

  “Now. Come.” He commands again, slamming into me harder. Faster. His pace quickens and it all become too much, and my roots of pleasure bloom until it takes over, lighting me on fire that rages so heavily my vision goes dark.

  My entire body twitches as my orgasm abates after some time, and rough hands gently pass over my body. I glance down, watching as his soapy hands wash my body, caressing my skin and I swear, turning me when I thought it was impossible.

  I rest my back against the tile. The cool is refreshing. “You’re bad.”

  He smirks, a curl of wet hair dangling in front of his face. “Told you that you weren’t ready. You’re about to pass out.”

  He washes himself down quickly then turns off the shower. He pulls the towel that was laying over the shower curtain and wraps it around me. “Come with me.” He lifts me up, this time bridal style. He steps out, sopping wet, and walks out of the bathroom. He takes a right into a small hallway and walks to the end, pushing a door open with his foot and walking into a large bedroom.

  His bedroom is painted a dark, dark blue with gray furniture throughout. His bed sits unmade with black sheets and a black comforter, all bunched together in the center of his bed. His pillow has a permanent indent in the center.

  A laundry basket sits at the edge of his bed, and clothes are oozing out of it like lava out of a volcano.

  He drops me in the center of his bed and climbs on top of me. Everything around me smells like him. His minty, woodsy scent with a hint of smoke. His lips press against my collar bone and trail upwards, ending on my lips.

  I bring my hand up and run it through the back of his wet hair. “Thank you. For bringing me here.”

  He falls back on his pillow, pulling me up so I’m snuggled up against him. “It’s just my little shack. I’m on my bike more than I’m here.”

  “It’s nice, though. Not as bachelor-y as the clubhouse.” A question eats at me that’s been building since we pulled up here. “Have you… have you brought many girls here?”

  He barks out a laugh. “A couple.”

  I whip my head to the side, giving him a death glare. Which only makes him laugh harder.

  “You. Haley. Violet” He says once he can control his laughter.

  I continue to glare at him.

  He props himself up on his side, bringing his free hand to brush the wet strands of hair out my face. “You’re literally the only girl that’s been in this house besides Haley and Violet. No one else has been here, except for the guys.”

  “So, what… the girls you sleep with, you sleep with them in the bed that Lilah and I sleep in?” Bitter acid coats my tongue. “I’m not sleeping on that bed ever again.”

  He laughs at me.

  “You think I’m kidding. I’m not fucking kidding.” I’m actually kind of pissed about it and sit up to slide out of his bed.

  “Hold up.” He latches his long fingers around wrist and pulls me back down. Keeping me pinned down, he rolls over so he’s on top of me. “I can’t help but feel like you’re still on the edge of fleeing. You a flight risk, Ivy?”

  “No.” I glance out his window, feeling my wall start to rise.

  He grabs my chin and forces my gaze back to him. “I keep tryin’ with you, Ivy. And I see these moments where the real you comes out, but other moments I feel like you’re a million miles away. Like, Mexico, away. What’s the deal?”

  I melt into his comforter and release the pent-up breath I was holding. “I … I’m not…”

  “Spit it out, Ivy.” The edge to his voice borders on anger. I want to melt into these cool dark sheets and fall into the abys, so I don’t have to deal with his wrath.

  “It’s going to take time, okay? You don’t understand what I’ve been through all these years. I feel like I’m in a dream laying here with you. I was trapped, kidnapped. I won’t be able to give you my all until he’s dead.”

  “I’m going to kill him. You don’t have to worry about him anymore.”

  I shake my head. “I won’t trust anything anyone says until I see his head laying at my feet.”

  He rolls off of me and presses his back onto the bed.

  I reach down, grabbing onto his hand and lacing my fingers through his. “I’m sorry.” I say, staring at the ceiling. “I don’t mean to be cold towards you or anything. I … I need time to adjust. I’ve lost everything.”

  “So, you can build something new. Better than before.”

  I shrug. “Maybe. I’m just trying to take one day at a time.”

  “One day at a time.” He echoes. “I can live with that.” He gives my hand a squeeze.

  One day at a time.

  He’s right. He’s been trying. I should try, too.

  “Can I ask you a question?” I ask.

  “Mmm.” He says. He’s closed his eyes, probably exhausted.

  “Where’s your mom?” I ask timidly. I don’t like to bring up sensitive subjects, since I don’t like when they’re turned around on me. But I’m curious. None of the guys have mom’s, wives, family. The only family is Aziel and Lynx. No one else seems to be related. It’s an unconventional group.

  “My mom’s dead.” He says, completely and lifelessly.

  “What happened?”

  “She died while giving birth.” He shrugs, opening his eyes. “I never knew her. My dad didn’t even love her. She was just another girl.”

  “I’m sorry.” I say sadly. “That sucks.”

  He shrugs again. “Not really. She could have been a shitty mom. I had a great dad. He made up for it. Plus, I had all the guys here. I didn’t miss out on much.”

  “I’m still sorry. Everyone needs a mom.” I sigh, the crack in my heart growing at my words. An overwhelming pain comes out of the hole in my heart, and I reach up to rub at the ache.

  “Where’s yours? Your mom? Or your dad?” He asks.

  “They died.” I choke out, and Aziel sits up and turns towards me.

  “What happened to them?”

  I bite my lip, thinking of where to start. “They were good people. And I was a good kid. When I was… kidnapped, Santiago would come and give me updates. I made headline news. My parents searched and searched for me. They even started picking up the trail. I was so hopeful. They made it down to Florida and were going to cross the border. They knew I was in Mexico. The newspaper said their private detective was gaining a lot of evidence and my parents were getting excited for a reunion.” I stop to let out a shaky breath and wipe my eyes. “I didn’t hear much more after that. Santiago was so edgy. Then the next week, he came and threw a newspaper at my face. Said it was my fault. I read the headline. It said my parents were in a terrible freak accident. Their plane malfunctioned and crashed… they didn’t survive. He killed them, Aziel. And he blamed me for my parent’s deaths.” I cry, rolling over to burrow in his chest. “He killed my parents. I want him to die, so bad.”

  He curls his hand around my head, holding me tightly as the suppressed tears make their reentrance. I’ve cried so many times at the loss of my parents, but every time I relieve their tragic story, the flood gates open back up and it’s like I’m reliving their deaths all over again.

  “I’m sorry.” His hands shake against my head as he holds me. “I’m going to kill him, Ivy. And your parent’s deaths, it wasn’t your fault. I hope you realize that.”

  I shake my head. Talking about my parents is too painful. “It’s not soon enough. Every breath he takes is a moment too long.” I mumble against his chest.

  “Every breath he has stolen from you, I will take from him. Every minute of your life he has taken from you, I will take from him. For you. His days are limited.”

  I lean up, tears shining in my eyes and something heavy shining in my heart. I bend down and press my lips to his. “Thank you.” I breathe into him.

  He says nothing, pulling me so I’m lying on top of him. He runs his hand down my back, lulling me into a dazed state. I listen to the heavy thumping of his heart and smell his citrusy
smell surrounding him and me. Closing my eyes, I let him rock me to sleep to the lift and drop of his breaths.

  And nothing has ever felt so good.

  17

  Ivy

  “Ivy.” A squeeze on my arm, and I wish to myself that I imagined it. “Ivy.” No such luck.

  “Hmm?”

  “We should head back. Check on Lilah.” His voice travels through his chest and into my ear.

  Lilah.

  Shit.

  “Shit. I’m a terrible mother.” I fly out of bed, running towards the bathroom to get my clothes. “They probably hate me there. Abandoning my daughter so I can come to your house and have sex.”

  He laughs as he follows behind me, pulling on a pair of black jeans and a plain gray V-neck. His tattoos make him look so untouchable. This rough and edgy man was just cuddling with me.

  I just slept with him.

  Shit.

  I shake the thoughts out of my head. “Don’t laugh. It’s not funny.”

  “It’s kind of funny, and it’s a bit of an over exaggeration to say you were abandoning her. Haley offered to watch her. I bet they’re having a good time. She probably barely noticed you were gone.”

  I scowl at him. “Great, just what a mother loves to hear.”

  He attempts to hold in his laugh, but his chest still shakes from the effort. “She’s fine. Let’s just go.”

  I pull up my jeans and button them as I walk towards the front door. Not being able to admire his house earlier, I glance around as we walk into the main living area. It’s an open concept, but small. Dark seems to be the theme. This is obviously a man’s house. Dark solid oak floors, dark blue-gray cabinets, stainless steel appliances, dark—nearly black—marble countertops. The island has a bar top on it and opens up to the main living room. A few small couches and an oversized chair sit in front of one of the biggest televisions I’ve ever seen that sits above a large, stone, wood burning fireplace. It’s beautiful, small, and exactly Aziel.

  “Nice place.”

  He shrugs, turning off the alarm and opening the door.

  Okay.

  I walk down the steps and over to his bike, admiring as the sun sets behind the mountains in front of me.

  He walks up to me silently, hopping on his bike and turning it on.

  “Is everything okay?” I whisper into his ear as I slide on behind him.

  I can feel his sigh as he looks over his shoulder. “I’m fine. Just thinkin’ about shit. We’re heading to Mexico next week. Just a lot to do.”

  I nod. I completed understand, so I let him be quiet as we ride back to his house. I watch the sun go down on our way back to the clubhouse.

  When we pull up, all is quiet. That’s unusual. Not that this place has huge parties every night, but usually some of the regulars are milling about, smoking, drinking, and flirting with random girls I do my best to avoid.

  I hop off the bike before Aziel, racing inside and halting in place at the sight in front of me.

  “Don’t ask. Just… don’t ask.” Haley says. I turn my head towards her and she’s holding in a laugh of her own, wiping down the counter and picking up stray dishes.

  “What the…” I walk towards the living area, seeing West, Niles, Cassius, and Violent all sitting on the couch. The guys are playing a video game while Violet sits on her phone, chuckling every so often. Lilah, on the other hand, sits at the men’s feet that are propped on the coffee table in front of them. With extreme focus, she paints pink nail polish all over their toes. Their jeans are rolled to their shins and each guy has different amounts of polish on their toes.

  “Hi, Lilah.” I say hesitantly, “How’s it going?”

  She looks up, breaking into a huge smile. “Mommy!”

  The guys turn around, and now I can’t hold it back. “Oh my God.” I break out into a laugh. “What the hell?”

  The guys look like clowns with horrible makeup painted on their face.

  West stands up in disbelief, looking a little appalled, to be honest. “This kid does some kind of voodoo. I’ve never let anyone and never would let anyone do this shit to me. Then the kid comes up and asks to do all these girly things, all cute and soft, and we all cave. I don’t know what kind of kid you’ve got, Ivy, but I call voodoo.” He shakes his head in disbelief.

  “What’s voodoo?” Lilah comes up to me and asks.

  I lift her up, trying to contain my hysterical laughter.

  “It’s nothing, kiddo. We had fun. We’ll have to do it again sometime.” Cassius says with wide eyes as he hurries up the stairs, Niles following quickly behind him.

  “Thanks for… this, Lilah.” West waves his hand around and hurries up the stairs as Aziel walks in.

  Violent stands up from the couch. “I’ve got so many pictures. So much blackmail, Ivy. So much blackmail.” She laughs as she waves her phone.

  “Thank you for watching her.” I say. “You’ll have to show me those photos later. I’m going to go get Lilah to bed.”

  “What photos?” Aziel asks as he walks up to me.

  “Well…”

  “Violet, you better fucking not! I swear I will do you so dirty you’ll wish you never took the damn photos in the first place!” West shouts from the top of the stairs.

  Violet’s cheeks pinken, and she slips the phone in her pocket. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow, Ivy.” She runs up the stairs, leaving Aziel, Lilah, and I standing in a circle.

  “What was that about?” He asks, eyebrow lifted in amusement.

  “Cass and West and Niles let me paint their toenails and make them into princesses!” Lilah giggles.

  A dimple pops out in Aziel’s cheek. “Is that right?”

  “Yeah. Can I do you, too?”

  Aziel takes a step back, wincing. I decide to help him out.

  “You know, Lilah. It’s dark and way past your bedtime.”

  “Thank you.” Aziel mouths.

  “Mommy!” Lilah whines.

  “No, none of that. Let’s go to bed.” Lilah starts whining more, and I turn towards the stairs. I look at Aziel. “I’ll see you upstairs?”

  He smirks at me. “I’m right behind you.”

  I nod, head upstairs and get Lilah in her pajamas. By the time I settle her in bed and change into a pair of shorts and a tank top, Aziel is walking in, eating his last bite of a sandwich. “Sorry. Haven’t eaten since yesterday.” He says around a bite full of food.

  “It’s fine.” I say, suddenly nervous. I stand there a second and then slide into bed. Lilah says on her side, curled around a pillow, her body in the shape of a crescent moon. I lay in the middle, not sure which side I should lean more on. I usually lay more by Lilah and Aziel lazily curls his arm around me. We might share a few deep kisses, a few light touches, but that’s all there is.

  After today… I don’t know what to think.

  So, I lay there in the middle of the bed, ramrod straight, and waiting for any kind of direction I can get.

  “What’re you doin’?” He slides into bed beside me, curling an around my waist and pulling me across the cool mattress until my back hits his front. His hard front.

  “Shit.” I whisper, turning from zero to one hundred in the blink of an eye.

  “Shit is right.” He pulls me on top of him. As quietly as possible, I straddle him and bend down, pressing my mouth against his and let out a silent squeak as he nips at my lower lip.

  “I can’t get enough of you.” He palms my breast, our tampered down sexual tension firing up like a match to a gas fire.

  “Not here. Not here.” I whisper.

  He pulls the pillow from underneath his head and tosses it on the ground. With no effort, he slides off the bed with me still on top of him, laying down with his back to the carpet and me still straddling him.

  He lifts me off his waist to pull his jeans down, revealing his straining erection. My mouth salivates at the length. Tattoos that I didn’t notice earlier from my overwhelming lust cover his stomach and reach down to th
is lower waist. Dark, swirling lines, marking, and pictures fill his body like an abstract painting. A skeleton sits on his lower stomach underneath his belly button and fades out mid-torso. The skeleton looks decrepit, but the scariest part of it is that he’s screaming. The dark, soulless empty pits of the eyes look scared as they stare back at me. The mouth sits wide open, like he’s screaming something at me. Pleading, or maybe warning.

  I slide down Aziel’s body and look up at him as I admire him. His narrowed, lazy eyes look both lustful and angry. He’s careful with me, gentle. But I can see underneath his surface sits a beast waiting to be unleashed from his cage.

  I’m wondering how much of the villain Aziel really is.

  “What’re you doing?” He mumbles as I slide down his body. “You don’t have to—”

  “I want to.” I interrupt, pulling at his boxers. His erection springs free, bobbing against his stomach and twitching in anticipation.

  I grip it with my fingers, loving the hot, smooth feeling of his skin against my palm. The veins thump against my skin, barely restrained and eager for pleasure.

  My tongue pokes out, sliding around the tip and tasting the cleanliness from our shower earlier, combined with a saltiness that can only be described as Aziel.

  “Shit.” His hips jackknife off the floor, needy as he searches for my mouth.

  He’s so large. Even with my overwhelming want, there’s no way I can fit him all the way in my mouth. A drop of precum forms at the tip, and I bend over and slide him as far as possible down my throat, until the tip of him hits my throat. I gag around his girth, feeling him pulse and twitch against my cheeks. I flatten my tongue on the underside of his erection, hollowing out my cheeks and sucking as he slides out. My tongue reaches his head and I swirl my tongue around the tip, only to go back down until the tip hits the back of my throat again.

  I create a rhythm. Up and down. Up and down. Over and over again, going faster and faster. My hand curls around the base, sliding up and down with my movements. If possible, he grows harder inside my mouth. My jaw aches and my eyes water, but I keep going, because the rough groans coming from above me only spur me on further.