Goblin Slayer, Vol. 8

by Kumo Kagyu

  “Even if I knew any, I wouldn’t want to be flat out of ’em when we went in the dungeon.”

  “We sneak in, then.”

  There was nothing for it but a full-out assault. At Goblin Slayer’s words, everyone else nodded.

  “So we duck in the dungeon, rescue the princess, and beat up the goblins,” High Elf Archer said, drawing a circle in the air with her finger. “Easy enough. I’m in.”

  Lizard Priest made his strange palms-together gesture then hissed. “It is like buying a lantern at the store and going to kill the Great Serpent.”

  “What are you talking about?” High Elf Archer said.

  “It is a proverb. It means…roughly, that any adventure is simple if it be finished quickly.”

  Huh. It wasn’t clear if High Elf Archer quite understood or not. She was already restringing her bow with spider’s silk, drawing it a few times to test it out. Elves preferred to avoid releasing the string with no arrow, which was bad for the bow.

  Dwarf Shaman checked his catalysts—his weapons, in their own way—and said, “This sounds like it’s going to be a heap of trouble. But what else is new?”

  “I do not agree,” Goblin Slayer said as he looked over his gloves, armor, and sword. “We know what we must do. It is simple.”

  “…I guess you wouldn’t be you if you didn’t think so, Beard-cutter.” Dwarf Shaman gave Goblin Slayer a slap on the back; he tilted his head in perplexity.

  “…Heh-heh.” Priestess smiled the slightest bit at the sight. She didn’t have much in the way of equipment to check over; she only clung to her sounding staff and prayed to the Earth Mother.

  May their adventure end safely. May the kidnapped princess be unharmed. May they all emerge uninjured, saved.

  If I could have but one miracle from the Trade God and the God of Good Fortune…

  Then perhaps she could obtain a blessing that would turn ill luck to good fortune, just once—but she didn’t wish to pine for what she couldn’t attain. More than anything, it was disloyal to the Earth Mother, her goddess. Priestess shook her head.

  She couldn’t seem to focus on her prayers. It must have been from going the night without sleep.

  “Then there’s the question of whether any of the goblins might run away…” Priestess put a finger to her lips and made a thoughtful Mm sound. She thought she could feel her dull brain sparking to life in the morning light.

  She was thinking about the possibility that some goblin would detect the adventurers who had snuck into the dungeon. Or if the goblins had routine communications with the surface, they might send word of what was happening underground…

  “…I’ve never known a goblin to be that diligent,” High Elf Archer said.

  “She is right.”

  When Priestess saw Goblin Slayer digging through his bag, she moved faster than he did. She pulled out something she had placed at the top of her bag for just this moment. “Here! A grappling hook!”

  The Adventurer’s Toolkit again—never leave home without it.

  §

  Lizard Priest twirled the rope a few times, hooked it over the wall of the fortress, then grabbed hold of the dangling rope and began to climb, bracing himself with his claws.

  As he ascended with hardly a sound, Dwarf Shaman gave a sigh from his back. “Gracious me, Scaly. You’ve practically got me wanting claws here.”

  “It would not do for you to remain like unto your ancestors, the monkeys.”

  When they reached the top of the fortification, they lay on their bellies, looking left and right. All clear. Lizard Priest swung his tail, which hung down the exterior side of the wall, as a signal, and Goblin Slayer nodded.

  “We climb.”

  “Great, me first!” No sooner had she spoken than High Elf Archer practically jumped onto the rope. She shimmied up it, just as silent as Lizard Priest but without putting a foot on the wall. She twisted left and right, her little butt wiggling, and soon she was atop the fortress. That was elves for you; they learned a lot, spending their lives in the trees…

  “Scaly might have been right after all.”

  “I get the feeling you’re making fun of me,” High Elf Archer said, pursing her lips, and then drew the great bow from her back. She held it loosely as she looked back over the wall—down toward Goblin Slayer and Priestess—and waved.

  Goblin Slayer drew his sword, raised his shield and dropped his hips, then turned his back to the wall.

  “Go.”

  “Okay…!”

  Priestess, looking nervous, grabbed the rope. It would be unthinkable to leave her until last, as the rear guard.

  Instead, with High Elf Archer watching out for her from above and Goblin Slayer from below, she climbed.

  It made good sense for Goblin Slayer, who so often engaged in hand-to-hand combat, to take the ground in this case. But even if she knew he wasn’t that kind of person, well…she couldn’t quite put it out of her mind.

  “…You won’t look, will you?”

  “I cannot pay much attention to you until we are up top,” came the brusque reply.

  “I thought not,” Priestess said enigmatically and held tight to the rope. Then she exclaimed, “Hup!” and, with her staff at her back, braced her feet against the wall and began to climb as diligently as she could. Once she got going, she found she had no concern to spare for what was going on below her.

  The sun beat down on her, making her sweat, and her hands shook. Her face was bright red and her breath came hard.

  “C’mon, almost there!”

  “Ri…ght…!”

  Forcing her quaking body to stay in place, she somehow managed to reach up and grab High Elf Archer’s outstretched hand. The elf’s delicate hand didn’t have much strength in it, but it felt good just to have someone holding on to her.

  Priestess pulled herself up the last small stretch then flopped down on top of the wall.

  “There you go. Good girl. Want a drink?”

  “Oh, th-thank you…” She took a swallow from the proffered canteen to bring her breathing back under control. One gulp, then two. Priestess let out a deep breath and gave the water back.

  “And where’s Goblin Slayer…?”

  “Ahh, our dear Goblin Slayer? You needn’t worry about him, I should think.” Lizard Priest was keeping watch with his unique reptilian vision; his tongue flicked out and touched his nose.

  Priestess looked down from the fortress wall, and indeed, there he was: a lone figure climbing silently toward them. He moved without High Elf Archer’s practiced grace, finding his footing solidly on the wall. Nonetheless, he joined them shortly. He freed the grappling hook, coiled it up, and gave it back to Priestess.

  “Th-thank you.” As she was putting the grappling hook away, she remembered the question she had wanted to ask. “Goblin Slayer, sir. Where did you learn to climb?”

  It didn’t seem like an especially useful skill in goblin hunting.

  “My master trained me on a snowy mountain,” he said in response. “I have sometimes climbed without a rope as well.” His voice was even. “I mean a tower.”

  “Just to be completely clear,” High Elf Archer said, eyeballing him, “you mean the inside, right?”

  “The outside.”

  High Elf Archer looked up at the sky helplessly. The sun gave her no answer.

  “…How much of a muscle brain do you have to be to do that?”

  “At least I and the other one are different.” Though I cannot speak for him. He conducted a very quick inspection of his equipment. “What do you think?”

  “That depends on whether we go down the other side or not,” Lizard Priest said.

  “Mm,” Goblin Slayer grunted. “I don’t think there’s any need to go all the way down.”

  “Are goblin sentries apt to be diligent about their work?”

  “What do you think?”

  “Then, presuming we encounter none such upon the wall…”

  Just so. Lizard Priest nodded, t
aking out the map—the one they had received from Sword Maiden. He traced the flowing brushstrokes with one sharp claw.

  “I suggest we travel around the town atop the wall, drop down beyond the city, and enter the dungeon from there.”

  “Eh, guess we don’t have time t’kill slashing our way through town.” Dwarf Shaman took a swig of wine, perhaps to focus himself or stave off the fatigue, and wiped the droplets from his beard. “…We made it this far with nothing but Tail Wind. That’s pretty good economy, I’d say.”

  “This time, we shall not be able to come back until the work is done. Even if we were to rest inside the labyrinth…”

  …there would surely be no guarantees they would recover enough of their mental energy to restore their miracles and spells.

  “Hard limits on what we’ve got, then. Makes sense,” High Elf Archer said.

  “Still, attempt not to use magic. As little as possible,” Goblin Slayer added.

  “I’ll save my miracles,” Priestess responded, clutching her sounding staff to her chest and nodding seriously.

  He was saying that he would trust her to know when to use her miracles. Just the thought that she was being entrusted with that choice made her heart jump.

  I don’t think there should be any need for miracles until we reach the dungeon anyway, though.

  §

  “GOROBG?!”

  The goblin, drowsy in the middle of the “night,” didn’t know what had happened. He felt something cold slide into his neck; then an instant later, it felt like burning, and finally, he gasped for breath as if he were drowning.

  The goblin, hacking and wheezing, died before he realized his throat had been pierced.

  Goblin Slayer approached the corpse of the goblin, who had literally had his life’s breath taken away, and kicked it to the far side of the wall.

  “That makes five.”

  “Not as many as I expected, honestly,” said High Elf Archer, who had put an end to all three of the waking sentries they had found.

  They had to conserve arrows as well as spells. She started working the bolt free of the goblin’s flesh. Then, learning from the master, she gave the body a kick over to the exterior side of the wall.

  “…Guess I’m getting used to this.”

  Or maybe you’ve been spending too much time around Orcbolg?

  Back when they had first met, she would have given a disgusted groan at behavior like this. Well, the refusal to grumble and complain was one of the elves’ virtues, or so she claimed.

  High Elf Archer brushed her hands together, cleaned the residual blood off the arrowhead, and put it back in her quiver.

  “So they really must be inside,” she said.

  “Looks like it…,” Priestess agreed.

  A mass of goblins down there. Wasn’t it supposed to be dragons that one found in dungeons?

  Priestess, feeling her emotions threatening to get out of control, shook her head. “Is it about time?”

  “Mm,” Lizard Priest nodded, looking at the map. “Perhaps we should descend.” His hands were clean; he hadn’t taken part in the skirmish just now. But—

  “I never knew dwarves could run so fast! I guess they just need the right motivation!”

  “Watch yer fool mouth. If the enemy got ahold of your spell caster, what would you do then, eh?”

  Lizard Priest said, “I myself would perhaps not be so bothered.”

  Priestess, afraid lest the shaman should look to her for agreement, said evasively, “Safety first, remember!”

  She had been in close quarters combat with goblins more than once now, but it was something she would avoid if at all possible.

  Now more than ever.

  She had never worn mail before becoming an adventurer, yet suddenly, she felt so alone without it.

  Alone?

  Not anxious? Priestess blinked at the realization.

  She had been praised for it, saved by it; it had been with her every moment. She had repaired it so often, it would probably have been cheaper simply to buy a new set.

  “…I see.” Somehow, it started to make sense to her why he had stuck to that one helmet for so long.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing. It’s nothing,” she told Goblin Slayer, and then she took a deep breath.

  Then Priestess closed her eyes, clutched her sounding staff, and said a short prayer to the Earth Mother for the repose of the souls of the dead. She hadn’t had time on the road, so now she included the riders of those wolves in her heartfelt hope for a blessed afterlife.

  The question of life in this world is one thing, but in death, all are equal.

  She prayed, too, for the safety of the princess who had made off with her mail. She believed—or wanted to—that the mail would keep that girl safe.

  “Are you finished?”

  “Yes… I’m ready anytime.”

  “All right.”

  Priestess produced the grappling hook again, and Goblin Slayer lodged it in the wall, letting the rope dangle down.

  As if on cue, Lizard Priest picked up Dwarf Shaman on his back, and High Elf Archer put a fresh arrow in her bow.

  All that was left, with some variation in order, was a repeat of earlier.

  Once he was confident the first two were down safely, Goblin Slayer came next. He descended, controlling his speed by planting his feet on the wall. Once on the ground, he looked up and beckoned.

  “You going to be okay? Can you make it?”

  “…I’ll do my best,” Priestess said, trying to take High Elf Archer’s encouragement to heart. She grabbed the rope uncertainly. If she fell, Dwarf Shaman would catch her with a spell, so there was no danger—but still…

  “Errgh…”

  Priestess’s trip down the rope was so pathetically hesitant that she cringed to think about it.

  Hesitant or no, she did reach the ground, and then High Elf Archer slid easily down the rope to the bottom.

  “…It’s just like you said, Scaly.”

  “What have you guys been talking about?”

  How I wish…

  Priestess was so taken with so many things. Guild Girl’s refined manners. Witch’s womanliness. Sword Maiden’s maturity.

  How I wish I was like them.

  As much experience as she had gained, she was still unrefined, still young, still weak. These past few days had truly opened her eyes to that fact.

  If she’d had her act more together—yes, yes. If only she hadn’t let her mail get stolen, none of this would’ve happened, right…?

  Maybe that’s giving myself too much credit.

  Neither gods nor people could influence the roll of the dice, much less go back in time to change a roll once made. The very thought was absurd.

  “…”

  But then, maybe it was the absence of the mail that made her feel so naked.

  And that feeling of nakedness, that terror as if everything had been stripped away, was just like that very first cave.

  Priestess took a deep breath and let it out again.

  The only response to thoughts like those was action.

  “I’m ready.”

  “Is that so?”

  Yes.

  Goblin Slayer nodded, and Priestess confronted the yawning pit before her.

  It had been a massive iron door—once.

  Soldiers must have guarded it at one time. They were no longer anywhere to be seen. The door was besmirched with blood and filth, the formerly impregnable portal now standing slightly ajar.

  The air coming from inside was chilly, carrying a nose-prickling stench of rot.

  “Let us adopt our usual formation, then,” Lizard Priest said, giving a wave of his fangs, claws, and tail.

  “Looks like it’s time for the dwarf to wield his ax,” Dwarf Shaman said, pulling out his own weapon and stashing it in his belt.

  High Elf Archer nocked her arrow a little tighter, and Priestess likewise strengthened her grip on her staff.

  A
nd at their head went Goblin Slayer.

  The cheap-looking helmet; the grimy leather armor; the small, round shield tied to one arm; and in his right hand a sword of a strange length.

  “Let’s go.”

  On his order, the adventurers set out.

  §

  “Come to think of it, is this your very first dungeon crawl?”

  “Yes, and it’s the Dungeon of the Dead…”

  I really have the worst luck with firsts.

  Priestess could have wept.

  Goblin Slayer held a torch in his left hand to beat back the darkness, moving forward into the blank, unfathomable space.

  They were in a stone hallway. The architecture was precise and measured, as if constructed with malice aforethought.

  Priestess had been in any number of caves, some ruins, the sewers, and a fortress, but a dungeon was different from all of them. The faint illumination from the torch could show them only a short distance ahead, after which was darkness.

  This was no place to live, or even to conduct battle. It existed only to entrap and kill those who entered.

  “Well, I s’pose if you make it out of here, y’won’t find another dungeon that’ll cause you any…trouble.”

  “This is our first experience of such a thing, as well. We are in the same, ahem, boat, as you say…”

  Bantering but never letting down their guard, the party continued quietly through the halls.

  Yes, quiet.

  Although goblins were certainly hiding there somewhere, there was none of the raucousness of a cave full of them. And yet, there was no mistaking the sense that if the adventurers let their attention lapse for an instant, a goblin might suddenly appear in front of them. They absolutely couldn’t relax, and that made it clear why a rest in a dungeon would do little to restore their energy.

  No wonder dungeon-delving competitions had faded away among adventurers who wanted to compete with one another. Even with the Lord of the Demons gone from here, it didn’t seem like a place people should be visiting, let alone spending much time in.

  “How shall we proceed?” Goblin Slayer asked, to which Lizard Priest responded by taking out the map.