The Wanderer; or, Female Difficulties (Volume 4 of 5)

by Fanny Burney

  CHAPTER LXVII

  Escape and immediate safety thus secured, her tender friendship forGabriella superseding all fear, and leaving behind all solicitude, madeJuliet nearly pronounce aloud, what internally she repeated withoutintermission, 'I come to you, then, at last, my beloved Gabriella!'Cheerful, therefore, was her heart, in defiance of her variousdistresses: she was quitting Mrs Ireton, to join Gabriella!--What couldbe the circumstances that could make such a change severe to Juliet?Juliet, who felt ill treatment more terribly than misfortune; and towhom kindness was more essential than prosperity?

  Her journey was free from accident, and void of event. Absorbed in herown ruminations, she listened not to what was said, and scarcely saw bywhom she was surrounded; though her fellow-travellers surveyed her withcuriosity, and, from time to time, assailed her with questions.

  Arrived at London, she put herself into a hackney-coach; and, almostbefore her fluttered spirits suffered her to perceive that she had leftthe inn-yard, she found herself in a haberdasher's shop, in FrithStreet, Soho; and in the arms of her Gabriella.

  It was long ere either of them could speak; their swelling hearts deniedall verbal utterance to their big emotions; though tears of poignantgrief at the numerous woes by which they had been separated, weremingled with feelings of the softest felicity at their re-union.

  Yet vaguely only Juliet gave the history of her recent difficulties; thehistory which had preceded them, and upon which hung the mystery of hersituation, still remained unrevealed.

  Gabriella forbore any investigation, but her look shewed disappointment.Juliet perceived it, and changed colour. Tears gushed into her eyes,and her head dropt upon the neck of her friend. 'Oh my Gabriella!' shecried, 'if my silence wounds, or offends you,--it is at an end!'

  Gabriella, instantly repressing every symptom of impatience, warmlyprotested that she would await, without a murmur, the moment ofcommunication; well satisfied that it could be withheld from motivesonly that would render its anticipation dangerous, if not censurable.

  With grateful tears, and tenderest embraces, Juliet expressed her thanksfor this acquiescence.

  Of Gabriella, the history was brief and gloomy. She had entered intobusiness with as little comprehension of its attributes, as taste forits pursuit; her mind, therefore, bore no part in its details, thoughshe sacrificed to them the whole of her time. Of her son alone she couldspeak or think. From her husband she reaped little consolation. Marriedbefore the Revolution, from a convent, and while yet a child; accordingto the general custom of her country, which rarely permits any choiceeven to the man; and to the female allows not even a negative; chancehad not, as sometimes is kindly the case, played the part of election,in assorting the new married couple. Gabriella was generous, noble, anddignified: exalted in her opinions, and full of sensibility: Mr ---- wasmany years older than herself, haughty and austere, though brave andhonourable; but so cold in his nature, that he was neither struck withher virtues nor her graces, save in considering them as appendages totheir mutual rank; nor much moved even by the death of his little son,but from repining that he had lost the heir to his illustrious name. Hewas now set off, _incognito_, to an appointed meeting with a part of hisfamily, upon the continent.

  Again a new scene of life opened to Juliet. The petty frauds, theover-reaching tricks, the plausible address, of the craft shop-keeper inretail, she had already witnessed: but the difficulties of honest tradeshe had neither seen nor imagined. The utter inexperience of Gabriella,joined to the delicacy of her probity, made her not more frequently thedupe of the artifices of those with whom she had to deal, than thevictim of her own scruples. New to the mighty difference between buyingand selling; to the necessity of having at hand more stores than mayprobably be wanted, for avoiding the risk of losing customers fromhaving fewer; and to the usage of rating at an imaginary value whateveris in vogue, in order to repair the losses incurred from the failure ofobtaining the intrinsic worth of what is old-fashioned or faulty;--newto all this, the wary shop-keeper's code, she was perpetually mistaken,or duped, through ignorance of ignorance, which leads to hazards,unsuspected to be hazards.

  Repairs for the little shop were continually wanted, yet alwaysunforeseen; taxes were claimed when she was least prepared to dischargethem; and stores of merchandize accidentally injured, were obliged to besold under prime cost, if not to be utterly thrown away.

  Unpractised in every species of business, she had no criterion whence tocalculate its chances, or be aware of its changes, either from varyingseasons or varying modes; and to all her other intricacies, there wasadded a perpetual horrour of bankruptcy, from the difficulty ofaccelerating payment for what she sold, or of procrastinating it forwhat she bought.

  Every embarrassment, however, at this period, was accommodated byJuliet; who had the exquisite satisfaction not only to bring to herbeloved friend personal consolation, but solid and effectual comfort.The purse of Lord Melbury, which Juliet would only consider as the loanof Lady Aurora, was but little lightened by the small expences of theshort journey from Brighthelmstone; and all that remained of itscontents were instantly assigned to relieving the most painful of thedistresses of Gabriella, those in which others were involved through hermeans.

  Gabriella, with a grace familiar, if not peculiar, to her nation, ofsharing, without the confusion of false pride, the offerings of tenderfriendship, or generous sympathy, accepted with noble frankness theassistance thus proposed; though Juliet again was obliged to hide herface from the enquiring eye, that seemed strangely to wonder whence thisresource arose, and why its spring was concealed.

  Juliet now became a partner in all the occupations and cares of herfriend: together they prepared the shop for their customers everymorning, and decked it out to attract passers bye; together theyexamined and re-arranged their goods every night; cast up theiraccounts, deposited sums for their creditors, and entered claims intotheir books for their debtors: together they sat in the shop, where oneserved and waited upon customers, and the other aided the householdeconomy by the industry of her needle. Yet, laborious as might seem thisexistence to those who had known 'other times,' Juliet, by the side ofGabriella, thought every employment delightful; Gabriella, in thesociety of Juliet, felt every exertion lightened, and every sorrowsoftened.