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My Ex-Boyfriend's Dad: An Age Gap Older Man Younger Woman Romance (Silver Fox Daddies)

Page 14

by K. C. Crowne


  “For what it’s worth, I’m really sorry about what happened.”

  “Can you understand why what you did made me so upset?”

  “Yes. I could have gotten people hurt.”

  “You could have been hurt,” I corrected. “My job is to keep you safe, Vivian. But I can’t do that if you run off.”

  She snuggled in close, her nose pressed to my chest. “I won’t do it again. Promise.”

  I kissed the top of her hair. “Thank you.”

  It didn’t take her very long to doze off. She was understandably wiped. I didn’t understand how someone could look so sexy and so disarmingly cute at the same time.

  I rubbed my hands over my face, a realization dawning on me.

  I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if I lost Vivian. If anything happened to her. If she’d been hurt, I’d blame no one but myself for failing to protect her because this beautiful, infuriatingly cheeky, intelligent woman meant more to me than I first realized.

  She was, slowly but surely, becoming everything to me.

  And this was dangerous.

  Because once upon a time, I thought the exact same thing about Melissa. I was convinced she was the love of my life. I gave her everything. Opened up to her. Let her see a side of myself I never showed anyone else. I worked my hands to the bone to provide for her, give her the life she deserved. And in the end, it turns out I gave her nothing but grief.

  She was so fucking lonely, Dad.

  But you wouldn’t have known because you were always gone.

  I never thought about it that way before. All I ever wanted was to give Melissa and Wally a good life. That’s why I worked so damn hard. Could they not understand that I was sacrificing my time for their sake? Was it really my fault that they came to resent me? I was only trying to do right by them.

  Would Vivian come to resent me, too?

  I didn’t want to find out. My heart wouldn’t be able to take it. Not again. Not ever.

  I needed to put an end to things before there was no turning back.

  Chapter 23

  Vivian

  I noticed it first thing in the morning. He was exactly the same, but… different. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. Conversation was light. Friendly. Perfectly normal, if you were to look at the interaction from the outside in.

  Jesse made me breakfast. Eggs Benedict with a side of hashbrowns and freshly squeezed orange juice. He moved about the space with confidence, handled his utensils with care and precision.

  “You’re awfully good with your hands,” I said suggestively, eyeing the way he chopped up bits of potato.

  “Thank you.” His voice lacked any trace of warmth. I thought maybe I misheard him over the rush of the hood fan over the stove.

  When he plated up our food, I asked, “Do you think we can eat in the living room? Watch something on TV while we eat breakfast?”

  “I have some things to take care of,” he said firmly. “I’ll give you the remote. I’m sure you remember how to use it.”

  “Can you show me one more time? Help me refresh my memory.”

  “Sure.”

  I sat down on the couch and set my plate on the coffee table in front of me. Jesse didn’t take up his usual spot to my right. In fact, he didn’t even bring his food. He bent over, picked up the remote, pressed a couple of buttons. The projector screen unfurled from the ceiling and the default channel turned on. He handed me the remote.

  Perfunctory.

  “Uh… thanks.”

  “You’re welcome. I need to make a phone call in the other room.”

  I gestured like I was zipping my lips. “I’ll be quiet.”

  I tilted my head up, fully expecting him to dip down and kiss me. It was just an automatic reaction at this point. He’d spoiled me with little pecks before, so I figured he’d do it again without issue.

  Except he turned away and disappeared down the hall.

  I sat there, frowning up at the screen.

  What the hell?

  I shook it off as best I could. Jesse was an important man with important clients. I wasn’t the only one he had to tend to. Maybe this phone call was important. Too important to waste the precious seconds it would take to plant a kiss on my forehead.

  I turned off the TV and ate my eggs Benedict in silence. There was nothing good to watch this early in the morning, anyways.

  The second time I noticed it, it was just after dinner. He’d spent the whole day locked in his home office.

  Not literally. The door was open by a couple of inches. Probably so that he could hear me if I called for help, but he didn’t reemerge from his phone call earlier that morning.

  Jesse had given me a number to call to order food. There was a system, apparently. I could order whatever I wanted through the security firm. The food would be picked up by an employee at Pegasus Star, who would then in turn deliver it to the safehouse. This way my location would remain anonymous to outside parties.

  I ordered a pizza with extra cheese, pineapple, and banana peppers. A weird combination, but downright delicious. It was my go-to combo during my first year of college. Inexpensive. Filling. And a great conversation starter. It helped me weed out the weirdos who were too snooty to like pineapple on their slices.

  I approached Jesse’s office with a piece of pizza on a plate. I doubted he’d accept it with him being a health nut and all, but I wanted to offer it to him all the same. The low murmur of his voice reached my ear as I drew closer. He wasn’t speaking English, but Spanish.

  “Déjame saber cuando puedes. Gracias, Roberto.”

  I poked my head in, transfixed with the lilt of the language rolling off his tongue. “I didn’t know you knew another language.”

  Jesse didn’t look up at me, distracted by whatever he was reading on his computer. I wasn’t sure why it annoyed me so much. “It comes in handy sometimes.”

  “Where’d you learn to speak it?”

  “School.”

  “Oh? That’s all?”

  “Practiced it with one of my neighbors growing up, too. I think that helped.”

  “What was your neighbor’s name?”

  “Marco. He lived in the next trailer over.”

  I raised my eyebrows, curiosity hitting an all-time high. “You grew up in a trailer?”

  Jesse finally glanced at me, looking very much like I said the wrong thing. “Yes. In a trailer park just outside of Austin.”

  I grinned. “You’re originally from Texas?”

  “Is that so surprising?”

  “I don’t know. Don’t Texans have a drawl?”

  “Trained myself not to.”

  I tilted my head. “Why?”

  Jesse shrugged. “Just because.”

  I chewed on the inside of my cheek as the silence lengthened. “Hey, Jesse?”

  “Hm?”

  “Did I do something wrong?”

  “No.”

  “You’ve been kind of… weird. Short with me.”

  “Just tired. That’s all.”

  I didn’t believe him for a second, but I didn’t know how to press him for answers. Maybe he was telling the truth and needed some time alone. “I brought you dinner. I know you don’t eat stuff like this, but—”

  “I’m not hungry but thank you.”

  I ignored the uncomfortable tightness in my chest. It was hard to not take his attitude personally. Something was bothering him, but he wasn’t telling me what.

  “I’m going to bed,” I muttered. “Good night.”

  “Night.”

  It went on like this for another two weeks. I couldn’t wrap my head around it. This distance. Where the hell did it come from? Was Jesse still mad about me running off to Blue Cloud Financial and just wasn’t telling me? I thought we were past that. I promised never to do it again and meant it, so what was eating him?

  Why was he being so cold?

  He literally kept himself at arm’s length. Whenever I entered the same room as him, he’d mo
ve to put space between us. It wasn’t obvious at first, but now I was actively looking for it.

  He wouldn’t let me near him.

  He wouldn’t come close to me.

  We were in each other’s orbit, but our trajectories didn’t allow us to collide. He was actively avoiding me and I was done with it.

  Was he tired of me? Was that it? Now that he had his fill, he didn’t need me around the same way anymore. Or maybe he was getting bored of playing bodyguard. He’d taken my case on as a favor to Wally, after all. And now that Wally had dipped, Jesse was tired of being stuck with me.

  And it sucked. A lot. Because every time I saw him, the tiniest bit of hope kept me yearning. Maybe today he’d be in a better mood. Maybe today he’d tell me what was going on. Maybe today everything would go back to the way things were between us —fun and sexy and wonderful.

  At some point, I started sticking to the guest room. Call it childish stubbornness. Call it a woman scorned. If Jesse didn’t want to see me, fine. I didn’t want to see him, either.

  But staying in the confines of my room sucked, too. This penthouse was starting to feel a lot less like a safehouse and more like a prison. I wanted to go out, for a walk, to the park for a run. To a local coffee house for a hot beverage and buttery croissant. Heck, I even wanted to go back to work.

  Maybe not at Blue Cloud Financial, but somewhere. Just to keep my mind busy. These periods of silence were getting longer and longer. There was even a day when Jesse and I didn’t cross paths once, not a single word exchanged. I could imagine my brain turning into goop, so bored out of my mind that I could practically hear my synapses caving in on themselves because there was nothing else to do but listen.

  That night, I treated myself to a hot bath. Borderline scalding. My skin was pink and tingling, scrubbed clean within an inch of its life. It wasn’t the same kind of warmth I found in Jesse’s arms, but it would have to do. Sometimes I’d close my eyes and imagine him in the bath with me, not that he’d ever entertain the idea now.

  “I’m just a job to him now, apparently,” I grumbled bitterly to myself.

  But the tiny voice in the back of my head told me that couldn’t be true. I saw the way he looked at me. I remembered the way he touched me and kissed me and made me feel like a million dollars. What had happened between then and now to make him act so differently?

  With a heavy sigh, I slipped a hand beneath the water and reached between my legs, recalling how attentive Jesse was whenever he ate me out. I tried to mimic the movements of his tongue with the tip of my finger, but it wasn’t the same. Not even close.

  I tried to think of his praises, the way he’d shower me in endearments.

  Good girl. Smart girl. Angel.

  When I came, it was underwhelming. Nothing could compare to his tongue and the stretch of his fingers.

  I woke up on Monday feeling bloated. I did some mental math —an easy enough task for a math whiz like myself— and realized I was a couple days late. My cycles had always been really irregular, though, and it was safe to say I’d been under a lot of stress lately. As quickly as the concern crossed my mind, it faded into nothingness just as quickly.

  I rolled over in bed. Flipped my pillow to the cool side so I could bury my face in it. In my palm, I held the USB I’d stolen from Blue Cloud Financial. The download, though rushed, had been successful. All the encrypted files I needed were on this drive. I didn’t tell Jesse about it, though. He’d lose his mind. Maybe he’d be even angrier at me than he already was.

  I had no way of decrypting the files, though. Math and coding used the same alphabet, but they were still two different languages. I supposed I could go online and try to learn a few things, but who was I kidding? I was an accountant in training, not some sort of hacker spy.

  Anxiety consumed me. I was losing track time. Molly had been missing for a little over a month now. From what I’d seen on TV and in the movies, as well as read in books, cartel members weren’t exactly famous for their patience and understanding.

  What if I was too late? What if Molly was already—

  An errant tear soaked into my pillowcase, darkening the fabric where it made contact. The tears wouldn’t stop, nor did the sniffles. I tried to fight it, but I was tired. Tired of putting on a brave face. Tired of waiting. Tired of staring into an unknown future. My sniffles broke into uncontrollable sobs that I tried and failed to muffle.

  There was a knock on my door. It was none other than Jesse. Of course it was. He was the only one else in this forsaken prison.

  “Vivian?” I heard the door handle jiggle under his hand. “What’s going on?”

  “Don’t come in,” I snapped.

  “I thought I heard you—”

  “I said don’t come in! Just leave me alone.”

  “Do you need anything?”

  I wanted to scream. I wanted him to stop being such a dick. I wanted him to hold me like he used to. Tell me that everything was going to be okay. That Molly and I would be safe. That he missed me just as much as I missed him.

  Fuck, did I miss him. And I hated that I did because it made me realize just how much I cared about him.

  And now he couldn’t even look me in the eye.

  Chapter 24

  Jesse

  It was a herculean task not to touch her. I wouldn’t allow myself to because touching her was a slippery slope. I told myself these boundaries were in place for both our sakes. I couldn’t cave now, no matter how much I missed her.

  I tried to use work to distract myself, finally putting my home office to good use. It was my little fortress, a place where I could zone out and manage the firm without constantly thinking about Vivian’s plump lips or the sound of her cute giggle or how I went absolutely feral for her in those stupid pink shorts of hers.

  God, I missed her in her stupid pink shorts.

  But not just that. I missed her smile. Those three little freckles on her eyelid that were only visible close up. The way she fit in my arms so easily. Everything.

  The last two weeks had been torture. Worse than that.

  She was near. Only a couple of rooms away. Yet she was so impossibly far because I deliberately placed her there for her own good. I gave her space, respected her privacy. Made sure she had enough food and entertainment and whatever else she might need for a comfortable stay.

  Even though I wanted to give her so much more.

  For the first couple of days, I wandered out of the office late at night to find her in the living room, watching episodes of Jeopardy. She was good at it. Not so much with the history trivia, but everything else. I wanted to tell her she’d make a killing if she ever got to play on the show for real, but I stopped myself. I didn’t trust myself not to ascend into more flirtatious banter.

  Best if I kept out of her way.

  After the first week, I turned up the penthouse’s main thermostat. Vivian never complained about it out loud, but I could tell she was cold, always shivering and teeth chattering. She bundled up in a sweater and sweatpants, though oddly enough never wore socks despite it being the smart and easiest thing to do to warm up. She was stubborn like that. I liked that about her, even if it was silly.

  I gave her a phone number to call if she wanted food delivered. She ordered pretty much every night, opting to skip both breakfast and lunch in lieu of a snack around 5:00 p.m. and then a massive dinner around 8:00 p.m. Like clockwork. If I weren’t so dead set on giving her space, I would have told her that having equally spaced-out meals and portions was better for her health, but I didn’t want to overstep.

  One thing I did notice was that she ordered tuna casserole from this Italian restaurant down the way frequently. Always with extra cheese and a bottle of Diet Coke. It must have been delicious because she could clear the whole dish by herself without any leftovers. For what it was worth, it smelled great. I wanted to ask her for a bite, just to try it, but decided against it. She obviously loved it, and I didn’t want to take away from her favorite meal.


  On Monday morning, I got the call. Melissa’s name popped up on the screen. I nearly threw my phone out over the balcony.

  “Now’s not a good time,” I grumbled into the receiver.

  “When is it ever?” my ex-wife scoffed.

  “If you’re calling because you want more money—”

  “I’m calling because of Wally.”

  The muscles in my neck tensed. “What about him?”

  “He called me the other day and told me all about your argument. Why won’t you let our son do what he wants?”

  I laughed bitterly. “That’s rich, coming from you.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “It’s always been like this. You always play the good cop and make me out to be the bad guy.”

  “You are the bad guy, Jesse. Our son is out there fucking couch surfing because you’re too stubborn to let him live his own life!”

  My blood boiled. “Don’t you dare take that tone with me, Melissa. You don’t get to patronize me after you ran off with the fucking dog walker. I was the only one providing structure in his life. I was the only one being a parent.”

  “Not a very good one.”

  “I’m hanging up.”

  “You’re pushing your son away over something stupid, Jesse. You’re pushing him away, and one day, Wally’s never going to come back. Is that really what you want?”

  I ended the call, but not before the sting of her words stabbed me straight through the heart. Of course that wasn’t what I wanted. Wally was my son. My boy. I loved him with every fiber of my being. But as much as I hated to admit it, what Melissa was saying rang true. I was pushing him away. I’d be heartbroken if I pushed him away forever.

  God. I must have really fucked up if Melissa of all people was making sense.

  Doubt crept in and festered in the crevasses of my mind. I allowed myself to imagine Wally pursuing culinary arts. He’d never expressed any interest in cooking before, but was that because I hadn’t been listening?

 

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