His voice was hoarse, and I didn’t think it was just from the kissing.
I swallowed, reality coming back to me. “What are you doing here?”
“I’m here because my family is here. You and Chelsea.”
My heart warmed.
Then it finally hit me—Raff’s face! He had a black eye and what looked like a cut or something on his cheek. “What happened to you? Where’d you get the bruising?”
Raff laughed. “Funny enough, that’s also compliments of your family. Trevor.”
I gaped at him. “You saw Trevor?”
“He saw me, actually. He flew out just to tell me that I was making a mistake if I didn’t come out here and fight for you. I was glad he told me, punch or no punch. I’d been showing up at your apartment door just about every day wondering why you weren’t answering.”
My face heated up. I wasn’t sure if it was in pleasure that Raff had put in such effort, or shame that I’d skipped town without telling him. Perhaps it was a mixture of both.
Raff smiled at me, like it was all dust in the wind. “I appreciate what you did for me. Or tried to do, anyway, but—no job is worth losing you and Chelsea. I would have told you that if you’d stuck around longer than five minutes. I know we’ve both made mistakes, but it’s time to put that behind us.”
He took a deep breath. “The real reason that I left all those years ago was because my folks were about to lose the house. They were bankrupt. I needed a lucrative job, and fast. I couldn’t afford to be a part of a startup that might not see a profit for a few years. But my parents made me promise not to tell anyone about our financial problems. They were too embarrassed and didn’t want it getting out. Stupid of me, I know, but I promised. I listened to them. They were my family.”
“I didn’t pretend that nothing happened between us because I thought we were a mistake. Far from it. I wanted to be with you. I’ve been thinking about you and missing you all of these years. But I figured that it would be better if I tried to fool you into thinking I’d forgotten so that I wouldn’t give you a week of hope and then skip out on you. I guess that ended up backfiring.
“I emailed Trevor years ago apologizing and explaining but he didn’t want to hear it. Now that I know about Chelsea, I know why. I can’t imagine what that was like for you, and for him. I should’ve told you right away when I realize we would be working together, but I didn’t know how. I thought Trevor had told you the truth and—I was stupid. I should have told you from the moment you walked into my office that you’re the only woman for me. You always have been.”
I could hardly believe the words I was hearing him say. He had wanted me all of this time? I had been in his thoughts?
“We wasted so much time,” I whispered, feeling tears welling up in my eyes. God, if only both of us had been a little less stubborn, a little less prone to snapping…
“Hey, none of that.” Raff gently kissed me. “I want my family. You and Chelsea. For forever. If you’ll have me.”
God, that was all that I wanted. “Of course, I’ll have you.”
I pulled him closer and kissed him again.
We kissed slowly, languidly, like we had all the time in the world. And we did, I realized with a bolt of joy. We did. There was no need for secrecy, no end date on this. We weren’t going to have to wake up tomorrow with reality slapping us in the face.
I stroked my fingers through the soft hair at the back of Raff’s head, feeling him growl playfully against my lips in response. This felt almost like the first time we’d had sex, like we’d never done this before—it felt so new and exploratory.
Possibly because this was the first time, we were doing this without secrets or resentment between us. I’d had no idea that he’d been trying to take care of his parents when he’d left. I’d had no inclination that his actions were motivated by care and love, rather than selfishness.
And now he knew about Chelsea. He knew about the child we had together, the future we had together, and there was nothing stopping me from trusting him with her now.
We kissed and kissed and kissed, his mouth warm and firm against mine, his hands skimming up and down my back. “I thought I’d lost you,” he admitted, pulling away and starting down at me.
He gently stroked my cheek and pushed my hair out of my face. “But then I told myself I wasn’t going to let that happen. I won’t ever walk away from you again, and I won’t ever lose you.”
I could feel my eyes burning with tears, and I got up on my toes to kiss him again, because how could I not? How could I resist him when he was saying something as loving and gentle, as devoted, as that?
“Take me to bed,” I whispered.
“Back in your old room, huh?” Raff teased. “Just like old times?”
“Well, not entirely,” I pointed out. “You won’t be leaving this time.”
“No,” he agreed, “I won’t.” He paused. “And your parents won’t murder me if they find me sleeping in bed with you.”
I laughed. “You sure won’t have to sneak out right away this time.”
I took his hand and tugged him away from the door, leading him across the living room and up the stairs. “We do have to be careful, though,” I teased him softly. “We need to be quiet.”
“Oh, is Chelsea asleep?” Raff grimaced. “Don’t want to scare her or anything.”
I chuckled. Yeah, I would hate for Chelsea’s official introduction to her father to be him having sex with me. We’d never live that down.
We tiptoed upstairs, our hands still interlinked, and slipped into my bedroom, closing the door behind us. Raff pulled me in immediately, kissing me again, and I melted against him, getting lost in it.
God, he was a good kisser. This was all that I’d hoped our first night would be. This was how our times together should have always been, loving and enchanting, not fraught with confusing emotions and frustrations and secrets.
We could have kissed for hours and I wouldn’t have minded. I was just so happy to know that he wanted me. That he was in love with me. That my dream was at last coming true.
Raff held me like I was the most precious thing in the world, keeping me pressed up against him. I could feel him growing hard, pressing up against my thigh, and my mouth watered with anticipation, but he didn’t push me towards the bed. He just kept me held close.
At last, I tugged at his suit, pulling him back towards the bed and pushing his jacket off in the same motion. I wanted him even closer. I wanted to feel skin against skin, and be connected to him in every way in body the way that I felt we finally were in heart.
Raff carefully pulled my shirt up and over my head. I felt a bit embarrassed—so far, he’d only seen me in my office outfits or the lovely dresses I’d picked out for Rome, where I always looked poised and professional. But I’d just been hanging around the house today in sweats and a t-shirt. I hadn’t even put on makeup today.
But Raff still stared at me like I was stunning as he took my clothes off piece by piece. I felt like he didn’t care what I was wearing, I was still beautiful to him.
Meanwhile, he was wearing another one of his damn handsome, but damn layered, suits. And I was determined to get it off.
“Do you ever just wear jeans?” I asked, finally getting the last of his clothes off him.
“Trust me, you’ll be seeing me in relaxed clothes a lot more now that I’ll be my own boss,” he laughed quietly.
I thought now that we’d get to the main event, but instead Raff laid me down on the bed slowly, and I realized that we were still going to take our time.
My breath caught as he ran his fingers through my hair, tilting my head back so that he could slowly, luxuriously kiss down my neck. He was fond of that, but I was far from complaining. We knew each other’s bodies so well now, it was so much better than our first time together all those years ago, our last time in this bedroom. We’d only just been learning our bodies then, but this time we knew them. I knew how Raff liked to be kissed, how h
e liked his cock to be stroked.
I ran my fingers up and down his shaft, feeling how hard he was, already starting to leak a little. God, I was never going to get tired of having him inside of me. I was never going to get tired of the two of us joining together.
“You’re so beautiful,” Raff murmured. He kissed along my breasts, sucking one into his mouth and then pulling away with a lewd pop. “So fucking gorgeous. Always have been.”
“Where were all these compliments before?” I teased, running my fingers through his hair.
Raff looked up at me with soft dark eyes. “I thought you’d run away if I tried to get too romantic again, after that second night in Rome.”
He had a point. “I won’t do that again,” I promised. “I love you. I’ve always loved you.”
It had never occurred to me in all of this that Raff would also be feeling insecure. That he would be worrying about how I felt, and that he would be worried about my rejecting him.
We were both so fucking stubborn. I was so glad we’d found a way to make this work in spite of it all. Or rather, Raff had.
“Thank you,” I told him. I pulled him up into kiss after passionate kiss. “Thank you for coming after me. I shouldn’t have run away. I gave up on us without even really giving us a chance.”
“That’s all behind us now,” Raff promised. “Okay? We’re in this together.”
“Together,” I promised him.
Raff pulled away and kissed down my body once more, worshipping it with his mouth. I felt like he was telling me he loved me with each kiss, each nip, and each suck to my skin. I chuckled quietly as I saw the red marks appearing on my skin, all over. He didn’t have to worry about hiding any of the hickeys now. Nobody could keep us apart.
I gasped and moaned, trying to keep my noises down as Raff slowly stoked the fires inside of me. His fingers lightly, teasingly trailed up and down my body, driving me mad. He was working me up to dizzying heights of need, but he wasn’t giving me what I wanted. I clutched at him, feeling like my skin was on fire as he continued to touch me everywhere but only lightly, without the pressure I craved, and certainly not touching my pussy where I was getting steadily wetter.
“Raff,” I gasped out. “Please… don’t tease me…”
“All in good time, sweetheart,” Raff promised me. “You gotta let me explore how I want to.”
I whimpered but laid back, letting him continue to take his time all over with me. God, it felt so good, but I could feel the heat building between my legs until I felt like a volcano about to explode. It was almost unbearable.
Raff finally, finally slid his mouth between my legs, licking and sucking at me. His fingers made short work of me, rubbing at my clit, sliding in and out of me, and God, I could hear how slick I was, could hear his fingers wetly sliding in and out of me.
“Raff,” I whispered. It was so hard to keep quiet, so hard not to moan and wail when that was all I wanted to do. I was overwhelmed by the pleasure, but I had to keep quiet—and strangely that made it all that much more erotic. It was sexy that I had to control myself, that I had to keep the noises down so that Chelsea wouldn’t hear us. It sent a thrill through me.
“I know,” Raff assured me. He had to know that I was close to the brink. “Come whenever you want, baby.”
He licked at my clit again and again, his fingers curling in me to find that exact right spot that had stars flying through my eyes, and I gasped, coming hard. It felt like the volcano in me as at last exploding, but slowly, oh so slowly, the lava flowing down through my body, my orgasm prolonged and beautifully devastating.
Raff lapped up all of my slick, the evidence of my orgasm, prolonging it and spreading it out like spreading melted chocolate over a cake. I moaned softly as Raff placed warm kisses along my thighs, like he couldn’t quite stop himself from doing it, he just had to keep his mouth on my skin, he had to… worship me.
I felt adored. There was no other word for it. Adored.
Raff looked up at me, his eyes so dark that they were practically black. He looked like he was starving for me, but also like he was content just to look at me. Like I was worth staring at.
Had he always looked at me like that? And I just hadn’t noticed?
I felt like there was so much that I hadn’t let myself see because I was determined to keep my distance and see him as the bad guy. But not anymore. Now I could see it, and I wanted to drown in it.
Raff crawled up my body, kissing me lightly along the way, scattering light kisses until he reached my mouth, and I could kiss him properly.
“Get inside me,” I whispered, wrapping my legs around him.
“Yes, ma’am,” Raff replied, smiling into the kiss. “Your wish is my command.”
I could tell that he was teasing, but he also sounded a bit like he meant it. Like he really would do whatever I wanted.
It made me feel special the way I had always wanted from Raff, the way I had dreamed of, and then given up on. At last, I had it. And I wanted to make him feel just as special in return.
29
Raff
Cass smiled at me and kissed me like a revelation. Like she was finally letting the dam break and letting herself love me.
She wrapped her arms around me and held me tightly, kissing me wildly, deeply, and I poured all of myself into it. God, she was amazing and finally, finally, I had her. We could be together in the proper way, and I could be with her and Chelsea, as a family, the way that I’d always hoped for. After fucking up and then years of pining, thinking I had lost my chance at the one person that I’d ever wanted to truly be with… at last I was getting to be with her, for the rest of our lives.
I couldn’t wait.
I kissed her over and over, feeling our bodies sliding together, like they were trying to become one. I knew her so well by now, knew her body and how it worked, and I knew I’d just given her a goddamn satisfying orgasm—so I wanted to give her a chance to breathe.
And besides, it gave me more time just to relax and kiss her.
When I’d been younger, I hadn’t really understood the whole… just wanting to kiss someone thing. Once I had been old enough to get past making out and realize there was more to sexual relationships, that I could go all the way, kissing had turned just into a run up to getting an orgasm. But since reuniting with Cass… I just wanted to fucking kiss her all the time. Just like this.
Cass wrapped her hand around my cock, stroking it slowly, loosely, her grip only enough to tease me but not enough to actually give me any pleasure or relief. She knew just how to drive me wild at this point.
“You ready?” I asked. I wanted to be sure. I didn’t want to rush this.
Cass nodded, scattering kisses all over my neck and jaw. “Yes. I want you. Please.”
As if I could resist her when she was like this.
I stroked her, stretched her open, and then got a hard grip on my cock. I squeezed it tightly, otherwise I was sure I’d come instantly. I was so turned on but it felt like I was being dragged deeper and deeper into the ocean, huge and overwhelming but in a way that I had never felt before. Certainly not with anyone else.
Slowly as I dared, I slid inside of her, relishing each inch of it. Cass gasped against me, her breasts dragging against my chest, and I groaned, struggling to keep myself quiet. Cass was having an even harder time and I had to kiss her to keep her noises from getting too loud. I had no interest in having to explain to Chelsea that I was her father because the poor girl interrupted us like… this.
It was hard to remember Chelsea, though, or anyone else, or anything else—the entire world seemed to not really exist. There was just the two of us.
I bottomed out inside of Cass and the both of us shuddered. My vision blurred and I gasped sharply, heat coursing through me. Fuck.
For a moment, I just relished it. The feeling of her wrapped around me. I didn’t have to worry about rushing through it. I didn’t have to be completely consumed by lust like an animal because there
wouldn’t ever be another chance. We could take our time, and just enjoy each other.
Cass kissed me all over, her hands roaming over my body, like she had to map me out with her hands, like she couldn’t get enough of me. God, yes. I couldn’t get enough of her, either. I was kissing her everywhere that I could reach, until at last my desire to move was too much, and I pulled out, thrusting back into her.
Cass kissed me to muffle her moan, biting down on my bottom lip, and I hissed at the pleasure-pain of it. Fucking her felt so fucking good, even with this slower pace that we were trying to do, it still might take me only a few thrusts to come if I wasn’t careful. She was so fucking tight and hot, always, just for me.
Only for me.
“You’re so sexy, sweetheart,” I growled. “Fuck.”
Cass kissed me. “I love—oh God—I love how you compliment me.”
“I’ll keep doing it.” And I would, up until the day I fucking died. She deserved it.
“God you’re hot. I never wanted to admit before…” I thrust again and Cass gasped, cutting herself off. “I never wanted to—give into how I felt—but God, Raff, I fucking—it was always you, always, long before that night, and ever since—”
That meant so fucking much to me. My head was fucking spinning. I was drowning in her words, in her body, in her love. I could hardly believe that Cass had been longing for me all this time.
Fuck, we’d wasted so much time. But we were together now, and that was what mattered.
I thrust into her harder, faster, slowly ratcheting up my pace as Cass encouraged me with breathless words. I kissed her constantly, trying to keep the both of us quiet, whispering praise into her mouth. Yes, yes, yes, it was just her and me, the pleasure we were chasing together, joining into one, drowning in the ocean. Nobody else in the fucking world.
I reached around and under her thigh, hitching it up around my waist to get into her even deeper and harder. I loved her thighs, thick and gorgeous, my hand spanning the width of her and I still couldn’t quite get all of it. I’d gladly die between those thighs.
Dating My Brother's Best Friend Page 17
