To Love a Spy

by Aileen Fish

  Reminiscent of happier times, she lingered at his side, allowing her mind to wander to all the dreams of weddings and children she’d once harbored. Wistfully she reached out and softly threaded her fingers through the thick dark locks of his hair. So much had changed in recent months and years, and of late her memories seemed like distant dreams. Her once bright hopes for the future seemed like little more than girlish folly.

  Blinking past a veil of tears, she swallowed down the rush of sadness threatening to overwhelm her. Her gaze fell away from Cole’s handsome face, and the battered satchel resting on the floor caught her eye. Interest piqued, she chanced another quick glance at his sleeping form, and reached for the leather bag. In his ramblings when he’d first arrived at the house he’d mentioned having information. Was he carrying that information in his satchel? Did the contents of the bag answer whether or not he’d betrayed the confederacy? Betrayed… her?

  Nervous, Juliet threw back the flap on the satchel and glanced inside. She couldn’t discern much of anything in the soft lighting. She tilted the bag toward the firelight. The round face of a compass reflected the orange glow, and a few other miscellaneous items met her gaze. She thrust her hand inside searching until she located a sheaf of papers. Hands trembling, she withdrew the pages, and scooted closer to the firelight. Dread rushed through her veins and her heart dropped as she quickly leafed through the pages. The papers contained intricately drawn maps with markings, arrows and hand scribbled notes. These appeared to be battle plans.

  Juliet lifted a heavy gaze to Cole’s resting form. Had Cole stolen these with the intention of smuggling them to the Union Army? Shifting her attention back to the papers she silently prayed that he had an explanation.

  ~*~

  Cole groaned. Every muscle in his body screamed in protest as awareness slowly came over him. Where am I? Jumbled visions of Juliet, dark woods, and the blast of gunfire swirled through his hazy mind. My satchel. Where is my satchel? Panicked and disoriented, he tried to sit, but pain shot down his right side. He had to get the information about General Thompson’s offensive plan to Colonel Raymond with all haste. If this intelligence got into the correct hands the war would be over in a matter of months, maybe even weeks.

  “Cole,” a sweet female voice urged. “Don’t try to get up. Just lie back.” Gentle hands pressed against his chest.

  “Jules,” he rasped. The events of the night before flew through his mind. His mission… running through the woods… Juliet taking him in… She’d dressed his wounds, and sat at his bedside pouring sips of water down his throat all night. He owed her his life, and in his desperation he’d put her in danger. Guilt washed through him, and his eyes snapped open. “I have to go.” He shoved her hands away and rolled onto his left side, lifting up on his good arm. His head spun for a moment.

  “Don’t be absurd, you’re in no condition to travel.”

  “I can’t stay.” He forced himself to sit, trying to ignore the pain slicing through his back and right shoulder. “I wouldn’t have come here at all, but I was completely desperate.”

  “Desperate.” The word hung in the air for a long moment. “Is that because you’re a traitor to the cause?”

  Mind clearing fully he snapped his gaze to hers. Sadness and anger swam in her green eyes where love and adoration had once been. “Juliet…” his voice trailed off. He had no explanation or excuses to offer.

  “Confederate soldiers came to the house last night looking for a traitor. Those men were looking for you.” Briefly her icy façade cracked and she glanced away, looking so vulnerable it broke his heart. “And I found battle plans in your satchel.” Her haunting eyes flipped back to his. “Tell me it isn’t true, Cole. Tell me it is just a misunderstanding.”

  He ground his teeth, wishing he could reassure her, and erase the disappointment from her eyes, but there was nothing for it. He couldn’t lie. “It’s not a misunderstanding.”

  Horror filled her expression as she shot to her feet and distanced herself from him. “You despicable coward,” she spat. “The south is losing the war so you decided to switch sides? Is that it?”

  “No. Juliet—”

  “There are men dying, Cole, and you betrayed them. You betrayed—”

  “Do not lecture me about men dying, Juliet.” Repulsive memories whisked through his mind. Not a single night went by that he wasn’t haunted by visions of mangled bodies, blood, and billowing clouds of battlefield smoke. “You have no idea what horrors I have seen.”

  Juliet startled at the harshness of his tone and her rigid stance relaxed a fraction. “I don’t understand, Cole. Why are you doing this?”

  With a sigh, Cole scrubbed his good hand through his hair, searching for the right words. “Because I don’t believe in the southern cause, Juliet. I don’t own slaves, and I have no wish to see the establishment continue.” He gestured broadly toward an outside window. “I know what that hole you hid me in last night is used for. You and your mother never condoned slavery any more than I.”

  Juliet said nothing, merely crossed her arms, and glanced briefly away. Cole knew he’d struck a nerve, and it was a nerve in his favor.

  “But it is more than that,” he went on. “I don’t believe in dividing the United States of America. My grandfather fought the British to create this nation, and the last thing I want is to be a part of tearing it apart.”

  Juliet’s piercing green eyes snapped back to him. “If you were sympathetic to the Union cause then why didn’t you go north when the war started.”

  “Because this is my home, Juliet. Our home. Our future. Everyone I ever knew or loved was ready to rise up and defend Virginia.” He shrugged. “As much as I disagreed with the secessionist movement I felt I had no choice but to stand with my family and neighbors. Like everyone else I hoped it would be a quick fight and we could simply go on with our lives. But that didn’t happen.” He released a weighty breath. “The war dragged on and I lost the heart to fight for a cause I simply don’t believe in. A little over a year ago I slipped away from camp in the middle of the night. I had every intention of leaving the Confederate Army and enlisting as a Union soldier. I still have the letter I wrote to you trying to explain my feelings. Instead I was recruited as a spy and sent back to ferret out intelligence and information about troop movements.” Cole shook his head. “You can call it disloyal or any other unkind name you wish, but I realized the need to be true to myself whatever the cost.” He met her gaze, wishing their reunion could have been a happier one. “Even if it means losing you.”

  She glared at him for a long hard moment her green eyes unreadable. Finally she glanced down, wispy curls swinging down, partially obscuring her face. She splayed the fingers of her left hand and wrenched his engagement ring off her finger, tossing it onto the floor at his feet. “I hope your clear conscience keeps you warm at night because I won’t be.”

  Cole heaved to his feet, heart heavy. “I don’t expect you to understand, Jules. Not right away.” His gaze drifted over her, trying to commit every lovely inch of her to memory. This would likely be the last time he saw her. “I’m sorry for causing you pain, but I can’t apologize for what I’m doing. The truth is that I can end the war. The information I have will stop the fighting for good.”

  ~*~

  The war could be over?

  Juliet fell to stunned silence, momentarily forgetting her anger. The promise of an end to hostilities was more than she could hope for. The last year had been Hell in Virginia. She stared at Cole standing before her… so handsome and broad… he was larger than life. The embodiment of every promise for the future she’d harbored. A vision of him kneeling before her three years ago flashed through her mind. His unexpected proposal had been the happiest moment of her life.

  “I’ll go now,” he said gruffly, disrupting her thoughts. “I don’t wish to put you at risk any more than I already have.”

  She blinked away the visions of a better life as anger and betrayal crashed back arou
nd her. How many other’s dreams had he dashed—snuffed out completely—by feigning loyalty to the south and smuggling information to the Yankees? Had her brother died as a result of Cole’s dishonesty? “That’s probably wise,” she said in a clipped tone.

  “Juliet,” he said softly, taking a hesitant step forward. “Thank you for your help, and your silence.”

  He extended a hand breezing a calloused thumb across her cheek. She snatched away. “Don’t touch me.” She put the distance of the room between them. “Get out. As far as I’m concerned you were never here.” Hot tears rushed to her eyes. “You are dead to me.”

  Raw devastation darkened Cole’s eyes. For a moment he looked as though he’d say more, but in the end he simply nodded and turned away from her. Moving slowly, gingerly, he donned the clean shirt she’d brought down the night before. Instinctively she wanted to help him with it, save him from the discomfort his injured shoulder must be causing, but… the bitter reality of his choices kept her back. He was a traitor and had already gleaned more help from her than he deserved. Fists clenched she remained rooted to the spot. He buttoned his shirt, and, without so much as a final glance in her direction, he collected his things, and quit the room. Seconds later the back door slammed and Juliet knew he was gone forever.

  Grief stricken, she stood in the middle of the sitting room staring at her discarded engagement ring. The blue gemstone glowed eerily in the firelight. She’d waited years for Cole to put that ring on her finger, and now she knew an intense impulse to scream and hurl the blasted thing through the window—or maybe drop it down the privy. Yes… the privy did seem a more apt place for it. Part of her wanted to crumble to the floor while another secret part of her wanted to chase after Cole and beg him to stay. As of this moment, she’d lost everything. Rather than scream or cry, however, she remained still and silent, transfixed by the strange blue fire emulating from the ring.

  I can end the war… Cole’s words circled round and round in her mind, refusing to give her peace.

  The rumble of hoof beats from the main yard drew her attention. Dragging a rattling breath into her lungs she dragged her gaze from the ring to the window where the first strains of dawn light slanted through the wavy glass. Her mother must finally be home. Thank heavens, Juliet was more than ready for a little company and to tell her mother all that had transpired. She hurried to the window and ground to an immediate halt, shocked to see the rag-tag team of soldiers from the night before marching back into her yard.

  Captain Reynolds traversed the yard on his—correction… her—massive black horse. “Surround the house, and find that lying Yankee whore,” he barked angrily. “If she’s hiding that bastard here we’ll find him.”

  What? How could they know? Panicked, Juliet ran toward the rifle stashed beside the door. Before she could reach the weapon, however, the front door exploded inward, admitting a rather burly gray clad soldier.

  The man’s menacing gaze instantly honed in on her. “I’ve got her, Captain.” Without further warning he strode forward and snared her arm in a vicious grasp.

  “Unhand me!” She wrenched against his unrelenting grip. “What is going on here? Get off of my property.”

  Ignoring her demands, the soldier dragged her bodily from the house and down the porch stairs to where Captain Reynolds held court in the middle of the yard.

  She glared up at the arrogant officer. “What is the meaning of this? You have no right to treat me this way.”

  Reynolds sneered down at her. “You see, Miss Jackson, we marched on down the road, and learned some very interesting information from some of your neighbors. It turns out that you’re engaged to be married to the sniveling Yankee traitor we’re looking for.”

  She yanked against the soldier holding her captive, and firmly held the captain’s gaze. “I am not engaged to any traitor.”

  The captain dismounted and advanced on her with measured steps. Chilling menace churned in his eyes as he slowly removed the leather riding gloves from his hands.

  Shivers of cold fear curled down her spine, but she refused to show the cruel officer any weakness. Lifting her chin she glared back at him.

  “Did your sweetheart stop by for a visit?” Acid dripped from his tone.

  “I’m not engaged to a traitor,” she repeated. It wasn’t a lie.

  “Well, Miss Jackson, that doesn’t quite answer my question now does it?” He stopped a few inches from her, cocking his head to the side. “I’m going to give you one last chance to tell me where Turner is before I order my men to tear your farm apart board by board until we find him.”

  “No! Please don’t do this. I’m a Virginian. My family is loyal to the south. You can’t destroy my home!”

  Captain Reynolds turned toward his men. “She’s not going to cooperate, boys. Search the house and the grounds. Use any means necessary to find that Yankee spy.”

  Instantly the soldiers scattered. Jennings, the kind sergeant from the night before, hesitated, casting her an apologetic glance before disappearing into the house after a couple other soldiers. A few moments later a tremendous crash broke the morning stillness as a wooden chair sailed through the front window of the house. A cloud of glass shards flew out over the wooden porch.

  “No!” she cried, desperately fighting against the soldier holding her back. “Don’t do this! He isn’t here. I swear to you there is no one here.”

  “Shut up,” Reynolds ordered. “I will hear the truth from your mouth before we’re done here.” He lifted his right arm and struck her harshly across the cheek with his leather gloves.

  Juliet cried out as sharp pain sliced across her face. The oversized soldier continued to hold her from behind even as the captain beat her. How had this happened? These soldiers were supposed to be on her side!

  “I know how to make you cooperate.” Reynolds growled, raising his arm again. “We lost that bastard’s trail right before we came across your farm. I doubt that’s a coincidence. Where is he?”

  Defiant Juliet glared up at the captain, ignoring the stinging in her cheek. “He’s not here.”

  Reynolds brow furrowed over dark, angry eyes. “But I’d wager he was and I’d wager more that he can’t have gone far.” He swung his arm once more. “Or maybe you’ve been helping him this entire time.” He struck her chin with a crippling blow.

  Juliet’s head spun nauseatingly from the punishing force, and her knees buckled. The cruel soldier imprisoning her dropped her to the cold ground.

  “This will only get worse, Miss Jackson,” Captain Reynolds growled. “Do yourself a favor and tell me where your boyfriend is hiding.”

  Still dizzy from his last blow, Juliet didn’t respond.

  “Move away from the girl!” A familiar voice commanded. “Lay another hand on her and you’re a dead man.”

  Cole!

  A slow, arrogant grin stretched across Captain Reynolds face. “Ah, Sergeant Turner, so glad you decided to join us. Come out of hiding and I’ll let this little lady be.”

  Chapter 3

  Anger with an intensity bordering insanity pounded through Cole. Those beasts! How dare they beat an innocent woman? A trickle of blood dripped from Juliet’s lower lip down her chin, and Cole’s vision tinged red.

  Injured shoulder all but forgotten, he held his pistol at the ready and took quick stock of the situation at hand. At this point only the goliath of a soldier and the despicable Captain Reynolds remained in the yard with Juliet. He had to act before the captain alerted the rest of the men to his presence and he lost his window of opportunity.

  Charging into the yard Cole leveled his weapon on the soldier standing over Juliet and fired. The big man lurched backward and clutched at his chest before collapsing to the ground with a deathly thud. Without pausing Cole swung the pistol toward Captain Reynolds and squeezed off another round.

  The shot missed.

  Unprepared for the sudden assault, Reynolds hunched and ran for cover behind the porch. Cole took full advantage
and grabbed hold of the horse’s reins. Launching himself onto the animals back he turned the skittish horse in a tight circle that brought him right up beside Juliet. “Give me your hand,” he ordered, reaching his good arm down to her. Fortunately Cole had grown up in the saddle and didn’t require use of his arms to ride.

  Wide-eyed Juliet shot an arm out, clasping his bicep just above the elbow. Swiftly Cole hauled her up and over his thighs and the horse’s withers. Crouching as low as possible over Juliet, Cole urged the horse to a run and charged out of the yard. Once he put some distance between them and the soldier’s he’d slow and veer into the woods.

  Shouts rose up over the din of thundering hooves and several rifle shots followed them. Hardened to the sound of gunfire Cole didn’t even flinch as the rounds whistled eerily past his head, but Juliet trembled violently and cringed into his chest. Protectiveness swelled within Cole as he steered the horse around the corner and swept them out of the line of fire.

  War was a miserable thing and he’d seen enough of it. Bloated mangled bodies… burning houses… innocent women beaten… He wanted only for it all to end. If he could get this information to Colonel Raymond it would be possible to crush the remaining Confederate forces. The south would be forced to surrender. Life could move forward again instead of being stalemated in this bloody hell. Briefly he dropped his face into Juliet’s sweet smelling hair. His heart clenched. If the two of them came through this unscathed would she ever forgive him?

  Biting wind whipped around them, adding to his disparaging thoughts. Desperate to put as much distance as possible between them and the dastardly soldiers, Cole maintained a breakneck pace along the hard packed dirt road. Soupy, low hanging clouds covered the morning sky and threatened snow and rain. A storm wouldn’t help his mission, but it might deter the soldiers enough to allow him to get to Colonel Raymond.