I Married an Alien Handyman: A Spicy, Steamy Romp Across Alien Galaxies

by Nora Nolan

  “You beg me again to fuck you, but I want to torment you more. I grab one leg and sling it over, then I blister your ass before letting your leg back down. I go back to eating your pussy.”

  Zoe couldn’t keep from moaning. His course words whispered right in her ear had her on the edge. Her chest was heaving with labored breath.

  “Soon I decide I want to see you come. I pinch your nipples just the way you love it, and nibble on your clit before giving it a powerful suck while my tongue punishes it.”

  She felt his fingers move faster on her clit – faster than she would have thought humanly possible. It felt more like her vibrator than a man’s hand. She couldn’t give it any more consideration, though, because she felt that burst inside that made her gasp and cry out.

  He slowed his movements as she caught her breath. He cradled her breast in his left hand, very gently caressing it. His right hand stilled on her nub for a while, then he removed it from her panties, wiping the wetness on his jeans. His mouth was still at her ear.

  “Did I do as good a job as you would have? Or are you going to make me do my work over?”

  Despite her intense humiliation, she laughed at that.

  “It’ll do, I guess, for the first time.”

  He leaned back and burst out laughing. “You can’t fool me, sunshine. You loved it. Tell me. When was the last time you came that hard?”

  Her embarrassment began to dissipate. After all, she’d just had an excruciatingly exquisite relief of tension. She told the truth. “Never, I don’t think. That was… magical. Are you a wizard?”

  “Not exactly. Tell you what. The a/c’s been off for a while, and especially after that, it’s hotter than a furnace in here. You go in your bedroom, freshen up, and put on clean panties. Those,” he pointed at her crotch, “are soaking wet. Meanwhile, I’ll replace the filter and turn the unit back on. I’ll take you out for ice cream while it cools off in here. Or a cold beer, whatever you prefer.”

  “Oh, you don’t have to do that.”

  He put his hand under her chin, lifting it to make sure she looked at him. “I thought you understood you’re supposed to obey me.” He stood her up and turned her, pointed her in the direction of the master suite, and swatted her backside. “Now go.”

  * * *

  Glen helped her up into his truck. Once she was in, he buckled her seat belt for her.

  “Where would you like to go? Nice bright ice cream place, or dark cold beer place?”

  “I’m not sure I’m ready for the public yet. Everybody in the world could see how embarrassed I am.”

  He laughed again. “All right, then. We don’t have to go public. How about a drive-thru for a milkshake, then go out to the river to sit and talk for a few minutes?”

  “Oh, can we do that? It would be perfect!”

  “Of course, sunshine.”

  They got their shakes and made their way to the river in relative quiet. Glen parked in the shade and left the truck running with the air conditioner on to keep them cool.

  “It’s so beautiful out here,” Zoe said, sighing. “A little oasis in the city. We used to picnic here when I was a kid.”

  “I’m glad I picked a place you like.”

  “You definitely did.”

  “I think I’ve zeroed in on a few things you like.”

  That grin!

  “Oh, this is why I didn’t want to go public. I’ve never been so embarrassed.”

  “I could tell you were. If it’s any consolation, I thought walking in on you like that was hot. More than hot. Scorching. Blazing. A white-hot conflagration with explosions going off-”

  “Okay, okay,” she laughed. “You thought it was hot.” She smiled up at him, a little shyly. “I thought you were hot.”

  “Sunshine, I was on fire.” They both laughed. “And I’d like to take you out to dinner tonight.”

  “I’d like th – Oh shoot! I’m going out with my sister Ava tonight. There’s a new Mexican restaurant and we’re going to try it.”

  “All right. I have a buddy. How about we double?”

  “Is he a hot hunky giant like you?”

  “You’ll be amazed how alike we are.” He winked at her.

  “I guess I need to let Ava know.”

  “How does she feel about blind dates?”

  “Oh, right. Wait, I know.” Zoe smiled at him and picked up her phone, pressing the speed dial for Ava. “Hey – can you be at my house by 6:30? I think I might want to bar hop afterwards, so dress for it, ok? And you better Uber over here to be on the safe side. Cool. Luvyabye.”

  She put her phone back in her pocket. “There. All taken care of. Do you need to let your buddy know? What’s his name and what does he do?”

  “Dan, and he does the same thing I do.”

  Glen pulled out his phone and sent a text. His phone pinged when he received the response. He looked up and smiled at Zoe. “We’re good to go. We’ll all meet at your house by 7:00.”

  “We’ll be ready. So, do you think this will count as our first or second date?”

  “Technically, I think it’ll have to be a first one. This afternoon was a service call.”

  She shook her head and her cheeks pinkened a little. “I’ll never live that down, will I? I think I’ll just consider it a second date. I hate first dates.”

  He gave her that sexy look again and cupped her chin and cheek with his hand. “Aw,” he said, sympathetically. “Are you afraid I might not kiss you goodnight?”

  They both laughed at the absurdity.

  “Do you have to tell Dan about today?”

  “No, I don’t have to. Will you tell Ava?

  “Lord, no! Maybe later I’ll be comfortable with telling her, but for now, I’d like for it to be, I don’t know, ours. I’m still so embarrassed.”

  “All right, sunshine. We already have this red-hot secret between us, and we haven’t even had a first date yet. I like it.”

  * * *

  Ava arrived a few minutes early. Zoe killed a little time puttering around and pretending to still be putting on makeup. She wanted to wait until the very last minute to tell her sister it was a double date so Ava wouldn’t have a chance to leave before the men got there. At just a few minutes to seven, Zoe pulled her sister down to sit with her on the bay window seat.

  “I want to tell you something really quickly. I had to call a handyman to fix my air conditioner today. We hit it off immediately. It was amazing – I’ve never felt such an attraction. The chemistry was unbelievable. Anyway, he asked me out.”

  “Zo, why did two cars just pull into your driveway? If this is what I think it is, I’m going to kill you.”

  “That would be Glen and his friend, Dan. Please, Av, just give it a chance. I really want to see Glen tonight.”

  They watched the two men exit their cars and begin walking together toward the door. Ava gave a low sigh of admiration. “They look like they just stepped off a runway or out of GQ.” She looked back at Zoe with skeptical eyes. “Maybe I won’t kill you after all.”

  Introductions went smoothly. Glen pulled Zoe away, saying, “Come with me to check on the a/c.” Then he whispered, “Let’s give them a minute.”

  He pulled her to the hall, then past the unit and on into her master bedroom, closing the door behind them. “Now, about that first date kiss.”

  After three or four lovely and passionate kisses, Zoe stopped him. “We need to get back out there.”

  Glen acquiesced, and as they walked softly back into the living area, they heard Dan and Ava’s voices. They couldn’t make out the words, but from the tone and lilt, it was clear they were off to a flirtatious start.

  Chapter 5: Ava

  Sweet Lord, this is the hottest man I’ve ever met. Please, please, please, don’t let him turn out to be a slug or a bottom feeder or worse yet, a lousy kisser.

  They decided they should all four go in Glen’s car, largely because it had Dan’s blocked. Ava found that Dan had perfect manners to go
along with his perfect looks. He held her arm as they came down Zoe’s front steps, and gently guided her with his hand on the small of her back to the back passenger seat of the SUV. He helped her step up into the vehicle, then whispered, “If you don’t mind, scoot over to the middle. I’d like to sit next to you.”

  Ava saw the twinkle in his eye and scooted, wondering if her eyes ever twinkled like that. He got up in the seat beside her and she realized just how big he was. At five feet six inches, she wasn’t short, but he made her feel absolutely tiny in comparison. With one arm over her shoulder, he leaned over and across her as he began feeling around the seat and under her bottom.

  He’s so close and smells intoxicating. I could stick out my tongue and lick him if I wanted to. Okay, I do want to, but I won’t.

  “Sometimes the middle seat belts get lost. Let me help you. There, I found it.” He fastened her seat belt.

  Ava still felt the warmth from his hand where he’d touched her hip and butt. It had been ostensibly a simple gesture, yet it felt so deliciously intimate. She wanted more.

  She’d never had much luck with men, or even with the boys back in high school. She was almost two years older than Zoe, and not nearly as outgoing. Ava was the studious one, the serious one, although she had a wonderfully wicked sense of humor when she knew someone well enough. She didn’t date much, and she knew it was largely because she didn’t put herself in many situations where she’d meet new men. She didn’t like bars, and only went occasionally with her sister or their small group of friends. She’d been out with a couple of men from her workplace, but nothing became of either of those dates. Zoe had occasionally tried to fix her up, but she’d have no part of that. And if Zoe found out she was still a virgin at her age, she’d never hear the end of it. She just hadn’t found anyone she was that interested in. Until now.

  His arm stayed on the back of the seat behind her for the whole trip. She loved it because it made him sit turned just slightly toward her, making her feel like she sat in a protected space. The Dan Zone, she silently named it, smiling inwardly.

  Conversation was light on the way to the restaurant. Ava saw that Glen and Zoe had a definite spark between them and the more she saw how happy Zoe seemed, the more she hoped to develop that same spark with Dan.

  The restaurant, Pedro’s, was larger than they expected. From the front doorway, it was clear that the area to the left was a fraction brighter and more family oriented, and the side to the right, where the bar was, had lower lighting for a more romantic setting. Partitions were high, giving booths a good bit of privacy. Tables were farther apart than normal with strategically placed potted plants and small trees, giving them more privacy, too.

  The hostess guided them to the right side. Once inside, they saw there was a small dance floor in the back, close to a slightly elevated stage area. The bar extended all the way back. They were led to a semi-circular booth. The sisters entered from opposite sides and sat first, then scooted inward to make room for the men. It occurred to Ava that the guys made terrific bookends. They were brought chips and salsa and the men ordered several appetizers in addition to their meals. Dan saw her expression, tilted his head toward Glen, and laughed. “Takes a lot of fuel to keep us going.”

  Ava smiled. “I guess it does. Is your whole family tall and,” she instantly regretted saying the and. “Strong?” She’d been about to say “sexy.”

  “The men are.”

  Conversation was light-hearted throughout the meal. When Ava asked if Dan’s food was good, he scooped some up on a tortilla chip and brought it to her lips. She saw his eyes go from her eyes to her lips, again and again, as he slowly fed her the food, taking it away between small bites as he watched her mouth chew and swallow. She wondered if he imagined her lips doing other things, as she did. With each nibble of food, she increasingly knew that his feeding her was highly erotic to them both.

  A quartet tuned up briefly in the back and began to play favorites from the fifties to contemporary; a nice mix of light jazz, popular, and rock, with a little Motown thrown in. When she was through with her meal, Zoe began chair dancing. Glen smiled, shook his head, and stood up. “Come on, sunshine, let’s dance.” She danced all the way back to the dance floor.

  Dan finished his food shortly after and asked Ava if she wanted to dance, too. She smiled at him, looked around their booth, and answered. “No, not really.”

  “Good. I’ve wanted to get you alone since I first saw you.”

  She flushed a bit, but returned his gaze, trying to let him know she felt the same way. She knew she wasn’t very smooth in these situations. Think of it as a dance. Let him lead.

  Dan leaned down and gently kissed her. It was slow and sensuous, and her mind exploded with images of more passionate kisses with him. A heat like she’d never felt spread through her. It wasn’t like kissing other men, this was different. The heat tingled and persisted. He pulled slightly away from her and whispered, “That was even better than I imagined it would be. Now I want more. Much more.”

  He put his hand behind her head and held her more forcefully as he kissed her again. It was a rougher kiss, and she followed his lead as more images launched an assault on her senses. There was Dan laughing, holding her in his arms. Dan reaching for her. Dan fondling her breast. Dan undressing her. Dan ripping his own shirt off. Dan carrying her in his arms. Dan naked. Dan above her. Dan entering her. Her lying in Dan’s arms.

  These aren’t just my fantasies – what’s happening? Where are the pictures coming from?

  She pulled away, uncertain.

  “Are you all right, darlin? You look frightened.”

  “No, I’m fine. I just saw, I saw…”

  “What?” He asked with some amusement.

  “Um. It was nothing.” She tried to dismiss it.

  “Well, did you like what you saw?”

  She smiled, but had the presence of mind to look down. “Very much.”

  Dan smiled at her, and lightened the situation. He tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. “You’re beautiful.”

  “You are, too,” she chuckled. “Exactly what color are your eyes? Are they green or blue or aqua? It’s such a fresh, cool color. I think I’d like to paint my bedroom that color.”

  “Well, I could do that for you, you know. Benjamin Moore calls the color Poseidon.”

  “Poseidon. I’ll have to remember that.”

  “Do you want my eyes watching you in bed?”

  She inhaled quickly – she hadn’t thought about it that way.

  “Because if you do, it would be a lot easier, and lot better, to have me in your bedroom.”

  The thought of him in her bedroom was nice. No, not nice. It was hot. Hot and sexy and nasty and sinful and… Oh hell.

  She whispered. “I would like to have you in my bedroom.”

  * * *

  Glen drove them back to Zoe’s place and parked in front of the house so he wouldn’t block Dan’s SUV. Zoe invited them all in for drinks, but Dan and Ava begged off. Ava figured her sister really wanted to be alone with Glen, and besides, she definitely wanted to be alone with Dan. She gave Zoe a big hug and promised they’d talk tomorrow.

  Dan helped her up into the SUV and fastened her seat belt again. This time, though, he let his hand brush her breasts as he drew it across her to fasten it, and kissed her before closing her door. As they drove and she gave him directions, she noticed he seemed to get in the correct lane even before she told him of the next turn. She decided it was coincidental.

  When they arrived at her apartment complex, she reached her hand up to the car door handle. “Wait, darlin, let me help you out,” he said. As Dan walked around the front of the car, she mused at the gallantry. Are there really still men out there who treat women “like a lady”? Grandmother would approve. She didn’t recall seeing many men do that unless the woman used crutches or held a baby.

  She pulled the keys out of her purse as he followed her to her upstairs unit. “Here, let m
e do that for you.” He reached for her keys and opened the door before helping her take the small step up into her foyer, then he handed the keys back to her.

  Ava was nervous, never having been in this situation. Since she hadn’t been with a man before, she not only didn’t have experience having a real boyfriend, she certainly didn’t know how to act with a one-night stand. All her adult life, she’d refused to even consider doing that. Now, all she knew was she wanted Dan. If it lasted for a while, that would be wonderful. If it lasted only one night, that would have to do. She wanted him.

  She looked up at him, way up, and asked if he would like a drink.

  “Mmm, I don’t know. Are you having one?”

  “I think I need one.”

  He smoothed her hair behind her ear and ran the back of his hand down her face. “You really don’t. It’ll be fine.” His fingers traced across her bottom lip.

  That heat again. I’m not imagining this! It’s almost like his hand’s one of those vibrators with heat, except the heat goes down deeper. I want this. I need more.

  “Um, come on in and sit down,” she said, weakly.

  “Mind if I take off my jacket? I’ll put it on the coat rack here.”

  “Of course, go ahead.” She watched him remove it, and it seemed to her like slow motion. The shirt revealed so many details she’d missed that the jacket covered. Oh Lord, those muscles. Wonder what he bench presses? Why isn’t this man married, or at least taken? I can’t believe he was available on a Saturday night at the last minute. Gotta be something wrong with him.

  She watched him hang the coat, then turned and led him into her living room. Once in there, she didn’t know what to do next, but she didn’t have to worry about it long. Dan took her arm and turned her to him.

  “Come on, darlin. Come here to me.” He bent to kiss her. He was so much taller, though, he had to stoop. He smiled ruefully. “Well, this isn’t going to work.” He picked her up and set her up on the bar counter that separated the kitchen and living room. He nudged her legs apart so he could step up against the counter to be close to her. “That’s much better.”