“He’s still got a thing for you. But you’re forbidden fruit.”
I roll my eyes, irritated with the hope that has my heart beating out of control. I want that to be true, but all of his behavior tells a different story.
“Don’t tell me that you fall for that crap about pulling pigtails means a guy likes you.”
She shakes her head. “That’s not really what he does now, is it?”
“No, he disrespects me. That shit got old really fast. The women, well, that I can deal with.” That’s a lie, and the expression on Syd’s face tell me she knows I’m lying. “It’s the way he talks down to me. The he-man shtick has pushed me too far.”
“Yeah, I agree.”
We have suffered together. No matter what industry you are in, being a woman isn’t easy. For Syd, she had more than a few of her bosses come on to her. It’s one of the reasons she was so pissed off about being attracted to Grady. Thinking about Grady makes me think of Carter and Travis’ behavior around him.
“Do you really think he’s jealous of Carter?”
“He’s jealous with a capital J.”
“That’s absurd.”
“No, it isn’t. Carter represents so much Travis feels he lacks. He came from money—much like you. He’s successful and smart. It helps with his family but let’s be honest, he would probably be a billionaire without them.”
I nod. “But Travis is wildly successful.”
“He still sees himself as trailer trash deep down. And that’s another reason he feels he’s not good enough for you.”
I snort, then realize she’s not joking. “Syd? I don’t make you feel like that, do I?”
She shakes her head, but her face is somber. “It’s harder for Travis. I know a lot of people see the man he is today, but you know how shitty our family life was. He feels that he doesn’t measure up sometimes. I know he’ll say different, and you know that I have no overt problems with my background, but even I have doubts at times. It has nothing to do with what you or anyone else does. We didn’t just grow up poor. We grew up without any love. Just us, that’s it. You know.”
I nod. Their grandfather took them in when their mother had been deemed incapable of taking care of them, but he was a horrible person who resented both of them. It was not an easy life for either sibling.
“Look at us now though,” she says, smiling. “We both have careers we love, and I have so many shoes I make the most insane real housewife look normal. Travis loves that show, loves what you two do together. Just remember that as you work this out. And in the end, always remember that if he can’t be professional, you have every right to walk away.”
I nod and smile. “You got it.”
“So, I hear LuLu is in so much trouble thanks to the LOLs.”
I laugh and the atmosphere of worry seems to lift slightly. It’s still there, bothering me, bothering both of us I’m sure, but instead of letting it pull me back down, I smile and start telling her about the latest gossip.
Chapter Seventeen
Travis
We arrive at the Mason Jar just before noon and it’s packed. Thankfully, Nancy called ahead to make sure we could get a table. Their takeout is just as good as eating there in person, but Mason had assured her they would save us one of their big tables. As we settle at the long table that seats six, I make sure to get a seat next to hers. Unfortunately, Carter sits on the other side of her. I ignore him and look around at the restaurant. It’s housed in what used to be the train depot. The train no longer stops here, but Mason was smart enough to use the location’s history in the decor. We helped him when he renovated, and it was Nancy’s suggestion to keep the historical presence front and center. The arched windows were here when we arrived, as were the brick and wooden floors. It was amazing that it had stood open for over ten years, but it had been well taken care of. With just a little work, we made it shine, if I do say so myself. It was one of the first projects we worked on together. I glance over at her and she notices.
She smiles at me and I try to ignore the way it warms me up inside, but it does. It’s a genuine smile, one that reaches her eyes, and it is all that is right in the world.
“What?” she asks.
“Just thinking about our redo of this place.”
We share a smile and for that one moment, everyone and everything—the talking and the hustle and bustle of the restaurant—seems to dissolve into the background. Of course, just like every quiet moment with her today, Carter ruins it.
“So, Nancy-love, what’s good here?” he asks.
She blinks, the moment dissolving as she realizes that she’s mad at me still. She looks at Carter. “Just about everything, but they are known for their brisket.”
He purses his lips. “Yeah? Even here?”
We are at the epicenter of some of the best barbecue in Texas. Brisket is king here and Austin tends to get a lot of attention for it, but Mason is just as good in my opinion. Better in a lot of respects.
She nods. “It’s my favorite.”
“Then I shall have it,” he says jovially. “Hey, Travis, you going to be in San Antonio anytime soon? I was thinking we could do up Stallions again.”
He’s being nice, cordial even. But there is something in his expression that tells me he’s screwing with me. Why, I have no idea, but it’s there all the same.
“I don’t know when I’ll be there.”
I know he knows about the maybe stalker and that we are trying to keep it out of the public eye. I think Josh let the LOLs know, but they are not pushing the narrative on the Juniper Express. They understand what a mess Juniper would become if people found out about it. Press would show up and it would be a circus. Right now, they are keeping an eye out for things, but making sure that no one else knows.
“Nancy can come too. I’m sorry I couldn’t be there when you were there last time.”
Nancy’s face flushes and I remember that night distinctively. One of their friends had a bachelorette party at Stallions. Syd and Nancy got somewhat a little tipsy. Thankfully, not the starting a brawl and getting arrested kind that they did later here at Wyatt’s, but they still got very drunk.
The waitress comes to the table and takes our orders. “So, Travis, what are your plans for the off season? Would you want to come to Vegas with Nancy?”
That question leaves me frowning. Why would he want me to tag along? If we were in opposite positions, I wouldn’t want him around. Hell, I don’t even want him here now. But he’s sitting there smiling at me, like it’s no big deal.
“I think we’re going to stick close to Juniper for obvious reasons.”
He nods but says nothing else as the waitress returns with our drinks.
“So, I was thinking about the apartment,” Syd says. “The lease is up in October, and I will keep it if you both think you’ll use it. I mean, from now on you could stay at Grady’s when you pop into town.”
Fuck, it’s not the same thing. I like having the apartment because…I don’t know. Probably because I can pretend that we are more involved than just coworkers. Sad and pathetic, yes, but I have a whole fantasy when we’re staying there—especially with Syd practically living with Grady.
“I have a big guest house out back. It’s more of a pool house, but it has a little kitchen and a bathroom with a standing shower. If it’s privacy you are looking for, that works. It only has one bedroom and also a pullout couch.”
“Both are extremely comfortable,” Carter says as he sips his iced tea.
“How do you know?” Grady asks him.
“What?”
I can practically hear Grady grind his teeth. “How do you know?”
“Oh, I slept out there last week.”
Grady blinks and looks at Syd. She shrugs. Then he looks back at his brother. “When?”
“Oh, Friday night.”
“How did you get in?”
He finally looks up from his phone. “I just used the code.”
“I’ve
been telling you we need to change that,” Grady says to Syd, who just smiles and says nothing. Truthfully, I don’t know how they put up with Carter. Even before he started irritating me about Nancy, he was a handful. Always ready to party, he lives in his own little world. I’m assuming it helps him with his ventures in building a world class club brand for the family, but I don’t see how. He’s kind of a spaz, always inappropriate.
We start talking about nothing in particular at that point, but I’m always aware of Nancy. She gets up for a few minutes and sits next to Syd so they can talk. Their heads are bent together, whispering about something, and it irritates me that I can’t hear what they are talking about.
When the food arrives, she returns to her seat and we all dig in. Mason’s barbecue has won him a few awards over the years. It just doesn’t get better than his own sauce—a highly protected recipe. He doesn’t tell anyone, other than one or two people who have worked with him for years. And he is popular, especially during the summer. Locals love him, but the number of tourists outnumber us. By the time we finish and head out of the restaurant, the line is out the door.
Syd and Nancy want to do a little shopping, so they go off on their own…then Carter tags along because…of course he does. They both head into Nerdvana with Carter trailing behind them.
“Tell it to me straight,” Grady says, his gaze on the front door as we lean up against his SUV. “Do you think she’s safe?”
I sigh. “I think so, and Josh says a stalker will at least hold off for a little while with me around.”
He glances out of the corner of his eye, then back to the door. “This has nothing to do with the show, does it?”
“What do you mean?”
“The reason that you’re freaking out.”
Irritation winds through me and I barely keep my mouth shut. It’s hard enough that he’s Syd’s boyfriend, but he’s my boss and it’s embarrassing.
“Listen, I get it, more than you know, Travis. Your sister was a pain in my ass, truly. Knowing that she had issues with men she worked with in her past, it made me very wary of even starting things with her. Plus, without her, I would be lost at work.”
“So, what made you change your mind? And don’t be gross about my sister.”
He chuckles. “It was the fact that I realized that without her in my life was much worse than losing her at work. If work goes to shit, that I can handle. Life without Syd, that’s unacceptable.”
“What does that have to do with Nancy and me?” I mean, I know what it means, but I’m hoping he doesn’t. The look he gives me lets me know that he definitely knows.
“Do you want to keep playing stupid with me, or do you want some advice that has nothing to do with the fact you work for me?”
I sigh. “Okay, hit me.”
“You think that if you keep yourself away from her, ignore these feelings you have for her, it will just go away. Believe me, it won’t. It will grow and if you don’t confront your feelings, it will fester. Don’t make that mistake. It might make things difficult to deal with on set, but at least you can move on even if she doesn’t want anything to do with you.”
“Great.”
He chuckles. “Also, I’m planning on proposing to your crazy sister when we’re in Milan this fall. Just thought I would tell you.”
I glance at him. “Asking my permission, boss man?”
“Absolutely not. Syd would have my ass if she knew I asked you for permission to marry her. The woman takes her independence very seriously.”
“You’re afraid of my sister?”
“Of course.”
I laugh out loud at that. “Damn, it’s gonna be nice to have another guy around in our family tree.”
“You have a whole lot of them. With me comes my brothers. You will both be our family from now on.”
Something warm and happy moves through me. Even with the mess I’m in right now—or maybe because of it—I really need that back up.
“Thanks,” I say, then I remember Carter’s one of his brothers and my smile fades.
“Ha! Don’t worry. Carter isn’t interested in Nancy.”
“How did you know I was thinking about him?”
“Because we all get that look when thinking about him. I love him to death, but the dude drives me up the wall. You’ll see.”
Just as he says it, the trio come out of the store, laughing and talking excitedly. I hope so because I really don’t want to have to beat up one of my new “brothers.”
After we see Syd and the Hawthornes off, we decide to watch a movie.
I talk her into a funny horror movie. She’s not usually one for gore, but if there is some wicked humor in the movie, she can stomach it. Otherwise, she says it reminds her too much of her family.
That thought usually brings a smile to my face, but it isn’t doing it tonight. There are so many complications in our relationship right now. I think I’ve made some progress in that area, but with some jerk knifing her tires, things are a little tense. I tried to downplay it in front of my sister, but I know Nancy is worried. Then, there is our show and how I am going to have to beg her to return. I’ve made a lot of mistakes lately and they end with Sarah, the woman I was dating while we were in Amarillo.
Fucking Sarah. The truth is, the woman isn’t really interested in me. She wants an in with the network and while I will be happy to give her a reference—she’s funny and a bit of ham in front of the camera—I don’t want to say anything to Nancy about it. Usually, I talk things like that through with her. She’s been touchy about Sarah since she met her. I have no idea why. It was why I suggested she work for us. I wanted to get a rise out of Nancy, but it was a stupid move. Most of my moves have been stupid when it comes to Nancy. It’s probably because I don’t have much blood left in my brain when I’m around her.
I’m thankful it’s a movie I’ve seen before so I can think things through. I glance over at Nancy. She seems consumed by the movie, so I feel free to study her for a few moments. She’s no longer as skinny as she was when we were teenagers. Instead, she’s filled out perfectly—at least in my opinion. Although, I noticed that she was losing weight this season. Not sure what that’s about, but seeing that she ate her brisket and sides, along with some dessert at lunch, makes me feel better. She’s never been a woman who worried about her size, even after we got the show. So many women get pressured to lose weight if they are in front of the camera, but she never seemed to care.
She has one of those kinds of bodies that seem perfect. She might not be tall, but she has curves for miles. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve fantasized about holding onto her hips as I thrust hard and fast into her sweet hot cunt.
I sigh and try to push that idea out of my head. Kind of hard to do that with her sharing the couch with me.
“Stop looking at me,” she says, without looking away from Woody Harrelson as he battles zombies.
“Sorry. I was just thinking that you…”
Fuck. I was just about to admit what I was thinking. My thoughts seem to bleed out of my brain as I come up with something else to say. Most of the time I am good with women, but I always seem to step on my tongue when dealing with Nancy.
She glances at me. She has the prettiest blue eyes. They are dark blue with a rim of gold around the iris. “What?”
“Just thinking about how we both changed since high school.”
She smiles, then looks back at the TV. “Yeah. God, I’m so glad I get to eat all the carbs.”
Her mother had her on the beauty queen circuit when she was younger. Nancy hated it and in an act of rebellion, had dyed her hair pink. In those days, it was unheard of and she claims her mother is still angry over it.
She grabs the remote and pauses the movie. “Speaking of which, I was thinking of making some popcorn.”
There is one thing she can do in the kitchen and that’s make popcorn. She has one of those popcorn poppers for the stovetop.
“That sounds fantastic.”
Evil Sis: How’s it hanging?
Me: Is that something you should ask your brother?
Evil Sis: Sure.
I roll my eyes. Still as inappropriate as always.
Evil Sis: How are things going there?
Me: Fine.
Evil Sis: That is the female code word for DANGER.
Me: I’m not a female.
Evil Sis: Well, you are missing your balls. Or have you finally found them?
I shake my head as I hear the popping from the kitchen.
“Do you want butter?” Nancy calls out.
“Always.”
Me: So you think I don’t have balls?
Evil Sis: I know what you want. Exactly what you want. And someday, you have to take what you want. Take that chance.
That is unlike her. Oh, she likes to throw out advice all the time, but it’s like she’s reading my mind.
Me: Are you talking about the show?
Evil Sis: No.
Yep, of course she knows about my crush. I’ve been in love with Nancy for so long, I knew Syd picked up on it when we were younger. Apparently, I haven’t been hiding it as good as I thought as an adult. There’s no getting around it now if Syd has already figured it out. So, I might as well get her feelings on the subject. I need all the help I can get.
Me: What if I take a chance and it ruins the show?
Evil Sis: If you don’t, you might lose her forever. What will you do if she ever meets a man and gets serious? Which do you think is worse?
“Who are you chatting with?” Nancy asks, causing me to almost drop the phone.
I watch her as she settles on the opposite end of the couch, placing the bowl between us.
“Syd.”
“Oh? She hasn’t texted me.”
I chuckle. “She’s just busting my balls. You know, the regular crap.”
She smiles at me and all of a sudden, my throat goes dry. The light from the kitchen gives her a glow, or is that my imagination? I always see her as this unattainable woman, the one that will never be mine. But I always thought she would be around. I could admire her from afar, or close up, just no touching.
Love to Hate You: An Enemies to Lovers, Best Friend's Brother Romantic Comedy (The Fillmores Book 2) Page 17
