by Traci Sek
"I forgive you," I mumbled, not breaking the eye contact we currently held. It seemed each time I looked into those eyes I was safe. His shoulders sagged in relief and he smiled.
"Thank you. I brought a movie and some chips. I was wondering if maybe we could get to know each other a little better?"
I scooched over on my bed, making sure there was a good distance between us and patted the spot next to me. He walked over to the television to put the movie on. Slowly, Jake inched around the bed and sat down on the edge.
"It's ok," I said despite the tumbling feeling in my stomach. I pushed it aside as he made himself comfortable on the bed.
"So, what kind of movie did you bring?"
"Uh, well, it's an adventure comedy. I'm a sucker for comedy." His hand reached up and grabbed on to the nape of his neck scratching awkwardly. "I hope you don't mind?" A small giggle escaped as my hand came up to stop myself.
"I don't mind. They say laughter is the best medicine."
"Yes, I agree." He ripped open the bag of pickled flavored potato chips and held the bag towards me. Hesitantly, I reached into the large green bag and grabbed a chip, popping it into my mouth. An explosion of vinegar and salt danced on my tongue.
"These are my favorite chips." He says with a smirk.
"They’re very good. I've never tasted these before."
His smirk fell into a frown as confusion covered his face.
"Wait a minute. You've never tried the pickle flavor?"
"No.” I squished my nose up, “We were lucky to have any chips at all in our foster homes." Before I knew what I was saying, it had blurted out. Shame crept its way up taking over my mind. I didn't want him to know that about me. At least not now. The sadness he once held in his eyes was back.
"How long were you in foster care for?"
“Since I was twelve. A little under six years.” My whole body was itching to hide under the covers as if there were a monster hiding in my closet. The tears started to stream down my cheeks without my permission.
"I'm sorry, please don't cry! Don't feel ashamed either. It's ok. May I ask how many of them you were in?"
"Four." I shrugged and stared at the television. I couldn't hear what was being said as my mind was buzzing with so many thoughts and emotions. I had nothing left to lose now. He would find out sooner or later that I had indeed lied.
"The last foster home I was in, the lady that ran it always pushed kids out as soon as they turned eighteen. The day you hit me was my eighteenth birthday. I was on my way to an interview my social worker had set up for me." My eyes never looked in his direction as I talked. I just continued to stare at the television.
"Oh. So you didn’t lose your apartment?”
My mouth dried up like the Sahara desert and I gulped only air. “No.”
“Fair enough.”
My head turned in his direction. “Wait, you're not mad?”
“How can I be? I mean we barely know each other and I hit you with my car. I’d be a hypocrite if I said I was mad.”
We stared into each other's eyes, neither one of us moving an inch. “You know, you’re a good person for letting me stay here.”
It was his turn to look away from me shaking his head. “I’m not a good person trust me.”
“What do you mean?”
“Twice I’ve been faced with difficult situations and both times I’ve failed. I wish I could take it all back, reverse the time. But I can’t and now I’m left with haunting memories which cause me to behave in ways I sometimes can’t control. Like earlier for example.”
"Why are you letting those memories affect you that way? I mean we all have book worthy pasts but that doesn't mean we should let them control our future. My eighteenth birthday was my freedom from my past and I never wanted to go back.”
I could tell he was struggling with words. “It’s not that easy. I wish every day that I could just let the past go, that I could be free from my demons. Every day I wish I didn’t see what I saw the first time. And seeing you on that ground that day, triggered those memories tenfold. I feel like I’m starting from scratch.”
We sat in silence for a few more minutes. My mind was racing once again at his cryptic explanation of his past. What was it about my accident that triggered his reaction? Did someone close to him die? Was he blaming himself for it? Or did he kill someone by accident? If he did that, he would be in prison by now. Don’t be ridiculous.
“Listen I’m sorry for unloading that on to you. That was not my intention, I should probably go. Maybe we can try the movie another night." I watched as he jumped off the bed and crossed the room with incredible speed before closing the door behind him.
Chapter Thirteen
Jake
I'm such an idiot. I scolded myself over and over again. What the hell was wrong with me throwing such a deep discussion right off the bat? We were doing so well, finally making progress and I had to go screw it up. Good job Jake. She probably thinks you are a criminal. It hurt to know she lied to me about her past but did she actually think I would judge her? Did she think knowing where she came from would sway my decision to let her stay here? At least I knew a little bit more about her and her past. It was a small start but a start nonetheless.
I got off her bed and hightailed it out of there before she saw another side of me. I wasn’t ready to be that embarrassed yet. I didn't know what to do or say. How could I help her when I couldn't even help myself? I know it was cowardly of me, but I was at a loss and I didn't want to make things worse.
Sitting in my office at work the next day proved to be very difficult. I was trying my hardest to get the paperwork done, but I just kept recalling the previous night in my head. My office door swung open abruptly making me jump. My father waltzed in as if he were the king of England. He never knocked and was always the type that cared very little about others around him. He did what he wanted, when he wanted, and everyone else had to follow. It was his way or the highway, if you deviated from his protocols, all hell would break loose.
He was never like this though. After the incident with my mother, he was never the same. He became cold, hard, and dove into his work like there was nothing else around. I didn’t even recognize the man standing before me. I looked back down at my paperwork ignoring his presence.
"Hi, son." His boisterous voice echoed throughout my office.
"Dad." I nodded, dropping the pen down as I stood. He sat down on my black leather couch and crossed his arms on his chest. I had the feeling he wasn't here for business.
"I assume you know why I am here." He cocked one eyebrow and shot daggers at me.
I kept my face neutral and shrugged my shoulders. "Could be a number of reasons, just cut to the chase."
"I had a little chat with your sister the other day.” My heart sank into my stomach. She wouldn’t tell him would she? What benefit would she get out of it?
“She says you freaked out on her and you were very angry with her over a conversation about your mom."
I clenched my fists at my side trying to contain the anger that was slowly rising.
"She made a stupid comment first and it set me off."
“Jake, how old are you? You should know better than to start silly wars with your siblings. You know I won’t tolerate that.” I rolled my eyes. I was so tired of being scolded like a four-year-old.
"And what about this girl? Ashley said something about some girl that was over?"
My temples started to throb as I took a deep breath and let it blow out dramatically. I could kill Ashley right now. I blamed her crazy hormones.
"Yes. You might as well know now before this ridiculous drama gets out of hand. She's a friend who is in need of help. So I am helping her get back on her feet."
His face remained unreadable as he remained silent for what felt like an hour.
"Well, I must meet this girl." He finally said getting up and straightening his suit jacket.
"Why? She's just a friend dad-"
> "Who's living in one of my houses. I want to meet her. Schedule a lunch. I can't have random people living in my house! What's in it for her?
"She is nothing like that!" I surprisingly found myself angry at his ridiculous comment. How could he judge someone he hasn't even met?
"Then I shall find out for myself. One p.m. tomorrow." He turned and started to walk out of my office. He stopped suddenly and without turning said: "oh and apologize for hurting your sister's feelings." With that, he walked out slamming the door behind him.
God, sometimes that man-made me so angry. Ashley was always daddy's little princess. Some things never changed. Picking up my phone from my cluttered desk, I dialed Ashley's number.
“Hello."
"Thanks a lot Ash, for going to daddy and ratting me out. When will you grow up?"
"I think you should ask yourself the same question. When you know the answer, let me know ok?" She chuckled.
"Whatever. Sorry." I mumbled. I always hated apologizing, especially to her.
"I'm sorry. I didn't catch that." She responded sarcastically. I let out an exasperated breath.
"For the love of God, I'm sorry." She started to laugh hysterically.
"What is so funny?"
"Nothing." She finally replied after sobering up. "I guess I can forgive you for now but only because you sent help for me."
"Alright listen, I'm really busy. I have to go."
"Bye Jakey wakey" She coos in a baby tone a nickname she gave me so long ago. I rolled my eyes and clicked the end button. Tomorrow is not going to end well. I thought to myself. I just hoped she would come out of her room. I placed my hands on my face and practiced my breathing techniques preparing myself for a bad storm to come.
Chapter Fourteen
Emily
I had decided it was time to explore. I was itching to see the gardens that somehow held up in those bitter temps not to mention my underlying curiosity of the house itself. Despite the constant underlying pain in my back and every so often headaches, I was up for the challenge. I had recurring nightmares once again that always ended in bright lights and loud noises. The end result, waking up in a pool of sweat, shaking, and disoriented. I needed fresh air and that's exactly what I got.
After walking through only half the garden, I made my way through the mammoth kitchen and up the stairs. No one seemed to be around making the house exceptionally quiet. I slowly climbed the spiral staircase and then walked down the gigantic hallway that was not only lined with a thousand doors but also old paintings of people only heard of in text books.
A painting of three children caught my eye as my feet stopped on their own accord. Two boys and a girl between the ages of five and ten. The youngest boy who seemed to have a sparkle in his eye, caught my attention pulling me into his green eyes. They held so much happiness and laughter. A huge smile spread across his face, as he sat with his legs folded in front of the two older siblings. As a reflex, my hand stretched out, stroking the painting as my eyes took in every detail.
The sound of a throat clearing from behind me made my heart stop. My balance deterred as my body spun around causing me to lose all sense of equilibrium. Two strong hands caught my fall before the floor swallowed me whole.
"Jake." I whispered. His eyes seemed to light up for only a second before they were hidden once again by the mask he wore.
“I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to cause all that. I thought you had heard me walking up.” He released me from his tight hold. “Are you ok?”
"Yes, I’m fine now and no I’m afraid I didn’t hear you.” It was like deja vu all over again. I hadn't heard his car coming that day, otherwise I would have surely stopped myself from crossing that street.
Who knows how long he was standing there. He probably saw me caressing some random picture. Cringing internally, I didn’t meet his eyes.
"Good. So, this is going to sound strange but my sister told my father about you living here, and he has requested lunch with you tomorrow at one. To meet you of course nothing bad or anything."
My nerves started to creep up on me at the mention of his father. What would he think of me? What should I tell him? All I could do was bob my head up and down.
"Don't worry and don't be nervous. He's usually not a bad guy, and I'll be there with you. He just gets a little edgy when he doesn't know who's staying in his house."
"His house? Usually?”
"Yeah this is where I grew up. I inherited it when my father wanted to downsize, and I didn’t mean usually, I just meant that he’s a CEO of a huge company and a lot of times he can be a bit overbearing and cranky. There’s no need to panic over it.”
"Oh." Silence ensued until my eyes darted back to the painting.
"Who are these kids?"
Without even looking he answered, "my brother, sister, and I."
"Well it's a very nice painting." He simply shrugged his shoulders as if he had no care in the world.
“I got to get back to work. I'll see you later." He walked off into a doorway and shut it behind him not even giving me a chance to say goodbye. Had I hit a nerve? It must have had something to do with what he had revealed to me the other night. I was going to find out his well kept secrets no matter what the cost.
***
Waking up to the sun shining warmly on my face was something I didn't think I would ever come to love. The warmth on my skin felt amazing. It was a different kind of warmth that wasn’t temporary, and not being temporary was a fantastic feeling.
"Time to wake up Emily. Breakfast will be ready shortly and we have a busy day today. You know Mr. Williams senior is coming for lunch to meet you." Aida paused to make sure I was actually awake and listening to her.
"I'm not feeling the best today."
"Trust me you will feel better after eating and taking a nice shower. Mr. Jake has even arranged for you to get your nails and hair done." My eyes went wide. "Really?"
"Mhm but you've got to get out of this bed and tout de suite. I have to get these sheets changed and this room tidied up."
She didn’t have to say anymore as my feet swung off the bed hitting that plush carpet they had come to know and love. My toes wiggled into the softness as my body stretched. The gloriously large, spanish style shower stood before me as I let my hands run underneath the water until I knew it was the right temperature. Stepping in, I allowed the hard water to cascade down my body instantly relaxing my stiff sore muscles.
Once done with my shower, my hands grabbed the fluffy towel to wrap around my shivering body. An outfit sat neatly on my freshly made king sized bed. I was so grateful to Aida for always taking that extra step for me. She never treated me like a stranger but more like a daughter. The outfit was simple. A pair of nice blue jeans with a white tank top, followed by a red plaid button up shirt.
The hair stylist showed up with all the paraphernalia a girl could ever dream of. After explaining in small detail what I thought I would like, she carefully twisted my long unruly hair until it was laying in waves, cascading down my shoulders.
I marveled at my candy apple nails and toes, wiggling them back and forth. The smile, never leaving my face. I had never gotten my nails done before, so this was the best feeling in the world. Looking through the body length mirror, I twisted myself around and marveled at my hair.
“You did amazing! Thank you so much.”
“Of course! You look beautiful.”
A soft knock on the door made me look away from the mirror.
"Emily-" Jake had entered the room but stopped in his tracks. His eyes went wide as he looked at me from head to toe. I couldn't help but blush as I kept my eyes towards the ground. He was especially handsome with his hair spiked near the front, wearing a nice pair of faded jeans and a black dress shirt. I glanced at him again as he continued to stare. He then shook his head and continued.
"You look very nice. My dad’s here, are you ready?"
The fear of facing his father sent a whole new wave of nerves tha
t started to form in my stomach and spread up to my chest. I was not perfect by any means like I felt I had to be. My fingers instinctively reached up and latched onto my arms as if I were trying to rub the nerves away. Jake must have sensed this as he drifted over to me and extended his arm like the gentleman he was. Feeling the comfortableness he possessed, I took hold of it.
"Just be yourself and let me do most of the talking ok?" Concern was written all over his face. My stomach flipped again making me feel as if I was going to vomit. With my head down and my eyes trained to the floor, I made sure to breathe and take one step at a time.
We rounded the corner to the dining room and were instantly greeted with a tall, handsome man about Jake's height. Same deep eyes but with graying hair and just a touch of wrinkles under his drooping eyes.
"Dad. This is Emily."
"Ah yes. Emily, it's a pleasure to meet you." He extended his hand out for me to shake. I reached out my shaking, sweaty palm and shook his hand.
"Magnificent. Ashley wasn't wrong, you do closely resemble my late wife." I felt Jake tense next to me but avoided his eyes. The air in the room seemed to grow thick. Late wife? This should be an interesting lunch.
Chapter Fifteen
Emily
Sitting down at the big brown oak table that could easily fit twelve, his dad sat to my left at the head of the table and Jake was in front of me on the opposite side. The temperature in the room seemed to have dropped a thousand degrees, eliciting a chill that once again ran up my spine causing me to shiver. Aida entered the room with a tray followed by several other waiters. They laid plates in front of all three of us and poured our drinks.
