The Gift of Cockleberry Bay

by Nicola May

  How would she feel about him if she did see him.? Rosa asked herself. There was undoubtedly a spark of passion between them, but this had been ignited carnally just once. Single at the time, Rosa had only been in the Bay for a matter of days and was feeling out of her depth in the shop and its shabby, cold and neglected first-floor flat. Luke had deceived her, and she really should have had nothing more to do with him but, just as she had done with so many other men before Luke, she gave herself to him, driven by loneliness, pure lust and the need of human touch in any form.

  In marrying Josh, she had made the choice between security and risky freedom. Lucas was handsome, with a twinkle in his eye and the gift of the gab, but Josh was steady and dependable, good-looking and reliable. And after the turmoil that she had faced throughout her life, Rosa realised that ‘reliable’ was all right. It had taken a long time and many chats with Alec to accept that life was boring sometimes, it couldn’t always be fireworks, parties, hedonistic happenings. She had come from a life in which drama and conflict were the norm – it was all she had known. But she had come to understand now that the day-to-day routine of life had to occur, and that monotony and monogamy were fine – if your head was in the right place.

  She hadn’t regretted sleeping with Lucas. He had lit the fire within her when she had needed it; satisfied a craving – almost like the drag of a cigarette, or the first sip of a crisp cold glass of wine on a hot day. But then Josh had come along and filled her life completely.

  This didn’t stop Rosa from wanting to know if the handsome plumber was OK. She still had his number but was sensible enough to be aware that she had to let go of everything to do with him. Her respect for herself and Josh was too high for her to go down that road again. Lucas Hannafore being out of sight and almost out of mind was, without doubt, a good thing.

  CHAPTER 13

  Mary was standing on a stepladder outside Seaspray Cottage pruning back the ivy plant that ran rampant over her wall. She stopped when she heard the familiar steps of her daughter walking up the hill, put the clippers she was using in her apron pocket and started climbing down shakily.

  ‘Careful, Mother, that doesn’t look too safe,’ Rosa called out. Hot started sniffing around, then cocked his tiny leg against the ladder.

  ‘Hot Dog, no!’ Mary tutted. Then: ‘You got a minute, Rosa?’

  ‘Just a few as I’m meeting Ralph at the garage at twelve. He’s taking us to Jacob and Raff’s Polhampton place for Sunday lunch and I don’t want to keep him waiting.’ Despite many pleas for more taxi drivers in town, Ralph Weeks was still the one and only, very busy Lone Ranger.

  ‘That’s nice. I just got a juicy joint of beef topside in case you wanted to come to me, but I can freeze it for next week, if you like?’

  ‘You should have said earlier but that would be lovely, thank you.’ Hot scampered through the open door in search of Merlin, who was sleeping peacefully on Queenie’s old chair. On sensing the playful hound, he reared up and hissed, and fled through the kitchen to the cat-flap there.

  ‘Sit down.’ Mary washed her hands in the kitchen sink and dried them, then with her daughter sat opposite her at the table, she reached for Rosa’s right hand and began to study the palm. So accustomed was Rosa to her mother doing this to her, that she just sat back and relaxed.

  ‘When is Josh back, did you say?’

  ‘Mid-December. Haven’t got a date yet.’

  ‘Are you seeing him before that?’

  ‘I don’t know, to be honest, and I haven’t told him yet but I’m thinking not. There’s a lot going on, what with Titch’s wedding and everything else.’

  ‘Don’t be scared, daughter,’ Mary whispered.

  ‘Mother! Stop going weird on me.’

  ‘I wouldn’t want to fly for the first time on my own either.’ Rosa, with her closeted childhood and inability to keep a job down, let alone ever save enough for a holiday, had never been abroad. Mary suddenly took a sharp intake of breath, saying, ‘Don’t go this time. And you tell him to hurry up back, eh?’ She paused and her face assumed a look of fear. ‘But not until after the fireworks. You’ve got grandchildren to make – and that’s important. But it can wait a few weeks.’

  ‘Mary, what can you see?’ Rosa’s voice was firm. ‘Do you mean after the fireworks night here?’ Cockleberry Bay had a legendary annual fireworks display.

  Mary lifted Rosa’s hand to her face and pushed it hard against her cheek. ‘Yes, child,’ she hissed. ‘Tell your secret to the wind, but don’t blame it for telling the trees.’

  ‘Ow. That hurt.’ Rosa screwed her face up. ‘Stop it, please. And what’s that supposed to mean?’

  ‘What happened to that Nate fella who released the gulls the other day?’ her mother replied with a question.

  ‘Last time I saw him, he mentioned that he was liking the south coast more than the north but I–’

  Before Rosa could continue saying that she didn’t know what he was doing, Mary cut her short. ‘Bloody newspapers,’ she grunted, then took on the frail voice of an ailing Queenie: ‘Trust your instincts, Rosa, and nothing or no one else.’

  ‘I miss Queenie,’ Rosa said without thought. Visions of her wise, white-haired great-grandmother with her weather-beaten, furrowed face and sharp tongue came to the fore.

  ‘She is always with us, child.’ A teaspoon clattered to the floor from the kitchen worktop. Mary yawned. ‘Always with us.’

  CHAPTER 14

  ‘Ciao bella.’ Raff greeted Rosa with three kisses. ‘So, I have cooked the roast lamb for you today with all her trimmings. Jacob has even made fresh mint sauce from the garden.’ He threw a little piece of meat fat onto the kitchen tiles for Hot to gobble up.

  Rosa loved coming to the boys’ Polhampton house. It was built high on a hill with the most stunning views of Polhampton Sands below. The couple would quite often entertain, and when they weren’t working at the pub on a Sunday, made sure that all the main Sunday papers were put out on a table in the large conservatory overlooking the sea. There would always be sweet and savoury snacks to nibble, and any drink you could mention would be served at a moment’s notice. Nowadays, Rosa’s preferred drink for occasions like these was either Diet Coke or tonic water.

  Her relationship with alcohol had never been a good one. With her mother being an alcoholic, she had often wondered if it was a genetic thing which caused her to love wine so much, but after having many chats with Alec, also a reformed alcoholic, she had begun to understand it a lot more. She would drink to cover her pain, to not have to be present in the world. To enjoy the veil of unconsciousness, even for a short time. And boy, was she a terrible drunk. But again, she worked out that every person with deep-rooted issues made a bad drunk because it allowed for all the pain, suffering and discontent to come to the fore and be voiced.

  The old Rosa’s motto was ‘only regret the things you don’t do’, but sober now, there were a few things that she certainly did regret doing. Namely, getting drunk up West Cliffs, then putting her life at risk by falling; she had also put her beloved little companion Hot Dog in danger on several occasions when she was too drunk to know what she was doing.

  Her thoughts were interrupted when there was a sudden commotion coming from the hall. She could hear different tones and volumes of barking, plus the sound of Jacob scolding every one of his canine charges, who dutifully followed him into the kitchen and started jumping up at Rosa’s legs. In rapture on beholding so many playmates all in the same place and at the same time, including the Duchess with their new pups, Hot proceeded to run around barking madly too.

  Jacob put his hand to his forehead and faked collapsing against the kitchen worktop. ‘Five of them, Rosa. Five! They are driving me mad.’

  Rosa reached down and picked up one of the dachshund puppies. He fitted neatly into her hand. ‘I think I may internally combust with love,’ she said, tickling the adorable little fellow under his brown chin, then she snuggled him close to her chest. ‘He is just so
beautiful.’ She looked down at the other little fella scratching at her shoe. ‘They both are. Have you got names for them yet? I know you said you were waiting for the owners to christen them, but–’

  ‘Uno and Due – One and Two in Italian – for now,’ Raff broke in. He was busy taking the roast potatoes out of the oven and basting them. Then, without looking up, he carried on: ‘He moan and he moan and he moan. But he loves them all too much, I see.’

  ‘I know that. His bark is worse than his bite,’ Rosa joked as she put the little pup down.

  ‘I am here, you know.’ Jacob picked up a scalding potato from the sizzling baking tray; a glare from his husband causing him to drop it back in quickly with a sharp ‘ouch.’

  ‘So, have you spoken to Titch yet?’ Rosa asked. ‘The pups must be ready to leave their mum surely by now?’

  ‘She’s ignoring my calls, the little bitch.’ Jacob licked his fingers.

  Rosa laughed, then made a face. ‘Oh no. I remember now.’

  ‘Don’t tell me she doesn’t want one of them!’ Jacob groaned. ‘Yes, you’re right, I do love them all, but this is crazy shit. Is there a male equivalent of Mad Cat Lady with dogs?’

  Raff shut the oven door. ‘Sì! You are the crazy man with the dogs. But I’m not giving you away.’ He whipped Jacob’s bottom with the oven gloves.

  ‘She did mention that it might be too much, what with Theo and now planning the wedding,’ Rosa admitted. ‘Sorry, I forgot to tell you.’

  ‘Well, I’ll just have to put an advert in the paper – or maybe Vicki can help.’

  ‘Vicki can help with what?’ The voice belonged to their friend, the local vet Vicki Cliss. ‘The door was ajar; you didn’t hear me knock for all the barking.’ She kissed all of them on the cheek as the dogs tore off towards the conservatory, play-fighting as they went.

  ‘Where’s Stuart and the kids? I peeled enough potatoes for a small army.’ Raff was now rolling pastry for his apple-pie dessert.

  ‘They are on their way. I drove up, but they are so full of energy Stuart said he’d walk up the hill from the beach to try and wear them out a bit. I didn’t think you’d be able to cope with five dogs, two unruly kids and umm…’ She opened her coat and rubbed her tummy ‘…and two more little wishes.’

  ‘Oh, that’s wonderful news!’ Jacob rushed to kiss her on the cheek.

  ‘Bravissimo.’ Raff wiped his hands on his apron and did the same.

  Rosa felt tears welling in her eyes. Partly remembering the awful time earlier in the year when Vicki had lost her little baby boy right here on their friends’ bathroom floor. And selfishly too, because she realised more than ever that having children of her own was high on her agenda.

  ‘That’s such lovely news,’ she said quietly. ‘When are you due?’

  ‘Beginning of April.’ Ever intuitive, Vicki took off her coat. ‘I have approximately ten minutes before those boys of mine get up that hill, so come on, Rosa, let’s have a drink in the conservatory before they arrive.’ Vicki winked at the equally knowing Jacob who rounded up the dogs from the conservatory and went outside with them to greet the children.

  ‘How are you doing then, Rosa? It’s lovely to see you.’

  ‘Fine – I’m fine, and so happy you’re pregnant again. It was so awful that day here.’ Rosa shuddered. ‘Even I get flashbacks, so goodness knows how it has affected you.’

  ‘This has kind of blocked that out now. Twins too.’ Vicki beamed. ‘I can’t believe how blessed I feel.’

  ‘So, are there twins in either of your families then?’

  ‘Surprisingly, no, not that we know of anyway. On my To Do list is a family tree, but I’m too busy growing our own at the moment.’ Vicki put her hand on Rosa’s arm. ‘But it’s not all about me. It’s OK not to be fine, you know. I remember feeling so blue when we started trying again after losing Fred and the test kept saying no.’

  ‘Aw, you named him.’

  ‘Yes. Just because we never met him as a baby, that doesn’t mean his little soul is not around us, moving us on, sharing our lives.’

  Tears started to roll down Rosa’s cheeks. ‘I just got really excited thinking I was pregnant this month and then there it was, the red patch of failure.’

  ‘Not failure at all, simply proof that you are a woman and that everything is working just as it should. You’ve only recently started trying and you are both young. It will be fine. Producing little miracles isn’t always going to be easy.’

  ‘Look at Titch,’ Rosa sighed. ‘She only had to smile at Ben and Theo arrived.’

  Vicki soothed, ‘OK, there are some exceptions, I know, but try to relax, not worry too much and just have as much sex as you can.’

  ‘Chance would be a fine thing. Josh got a great opportunity to work in New York, and that’s where he is now. He’ll be back before Christmas though.’

  ‘That’s just weeks away. You have plenty of time. It’s OK.’

  Rosa blew her nose and felt almost immediately better. Vicki was the kind of person you believed; if she said something was going to be all right, then it would be.

  The vet went on, ‘I’m just so happy that you made the decision to start a family. It is magical.’

  ‘You know that I struggled with whether I thought I’d be a good mum or not and you really helped me with that.’ Rosa pulled back her sleeve to reveal the rose quartz bracelet that Vicki had gifted her as a thank you for helping her through her miscarriage tragedy. ‘The stone of fertility. It worked for you, so it has to be my turn next.’

  ‘Exactly.’ Vicki put her hand on her friend’s arm. ‘I could never have got through that day without you, you know.’

  Before Rosa could reply, the six dogs, now followed by Vicki and Stuart’s two sons, dressed up and whooping like Red Indians, came bounding towards the huge window overlooking Polhampton Sands.

  ‘This is the reality of it though,’ Vicki laughed, protecting her growing bump with her hand.

  ‘I’m ready for reality,’ Rosa said, then, nicking one of the boys’ feathered headdresses, she plonked it on her head and began running and whooping around the room as part of the chaos.

  CHAPTER 15

  Rosa shivered as she walked down towards the beach and the café. A magnificent late-autumn sunrise was just coming up where the sky met the sea. She was meeting Sara to discuss winter opening times, as, although they had a great local clientele, even that did dwindle on weekdays during the winter months. The clocks would fall back soon so it would be getting darker earlier.

  ‘I should have worn a hat,’ she said aloud to Hot, who was already running ahead on his lead at the excitement of chasing seagulls. Josh had been so clever to rename the café, ROSA’S – as it was half hers and half Sara’s. And it still gave her a warm fuzzy feeling when she walked down the hill to see the sign and realise that another dream of hers had become a reality. She could never have imagined this happening even two years ago. And now not only did she have a shop, she also had the café. It really was ‘pinch me’ stuff.

  Yes, Rosa thought, she had inherited the derelict shop to turn around, and turn it around she had, through her own merit and sheer hard work. She had always hoped that the locals would come to feel the same love and affection for her and the shop as they had had for her great-grandfather Ned and his wife Dorothea. Poor Dorothea, who was unable to have children and who, tragically, on finding out about her husband’s affair, took her life by leaping from the very cliffs in front of her. It was Rosa’s very own great-grandmother Queenie, Ned’s secret lover, who had given birth to Rosa’s grandmother Maria, Mary’s mum. Rosa had never known about her family tree on her mother’s side until she had come to Cockleberry Bay and begun to unravel the mysteries of her past. It was weird to think that if Queenie and Ned had never fallen in love, then she wouldn’t even be here.

  The lights of the café were already on and the windows slightly steamy. Rosa could see Sara, getting busy laying tables. She was such a great lady and she
, too, had worked hard to keep the café running as a little goldmine, just as old Harry Trevan had done before her.

  Despite the early hour, Vegan Vera was sitting quietly in the corner seat with a book open on the table. Sara murmured in Rosa’s ear that her stroppy customer had almost shown some emotion earlier when she had told her about the soy yoghurts they were now stocking. Rosa looked over and saw that the woman had one in front of her, with fresh raspberries on top, and was spooning it hungrily into her lipsticked mouth, in between sips from a large soy latte. Rosa realised that she had never seen Vegan Vera with a smile on her face. She had tried to make polite conversation with her a few times, but to no avail. The red-headed Bergamot was, in fact, rather an enigma.

  Rosa went over to see if she wanted anything else. ‘Good book?’ she asked pleasantly. Then, glancing down, she spotted an official-looking letter lying between the open pages.

  Without looking up, Bergamot replied abruptly, ‘Book’s great, fucking letter not so much.’

  Rosa tried not to laugh. Hearing swear words in a posh voice had always amused her for some reason.

  ‘Bastard husband – or soon to be ex-husband. I really thought that my leaving London and renting down here would make him see sense, but no, he’s still shagging the cocking housekeeper. She’s got an arse the size of Belgravia too!’ Angrily, the woman crumpled the letter up and threw it into her large designer handbag.

  Rosa tried to get a word in, but to no avail.

  ‘I never realised the pre-nup would stand, but his solicitor seems to think it bloody does,’ Bergamot rambled on. ‘It looks like I may have to go back to work at this rate. Me – having to work!’ She gobbled a mouthful of yoghurt and then stabbed at the bottom of the pot with her spoon as if her husband was down there, fornicating with the help.