Dirty Bastard (Wet Dicks MC Book 1)

by Echo Slater

  “I don’t accept that,” Grizz mutters. “My boy needs someone to play with here on the Ranch now.”

  “We could kidnap a child,” Stoney offers, rounding out our club. “My mom would be cool with that.”

  “Seems like too much heat,” Horse says immediately.

  “Naw, plenty of white-trash kids at the trailer park could be bought for a few hundred,” Stoney says, fucking with our club brother. “Get a boy Cross’s age. Problem solved.”

  Grizz grunts, bothered by how he can’t fix this problem. My president was never an easygoing man. His temper broke our club in half. But he’s grown into a different kind of grumpy since he met Raqui. Grizz wants everything to be perfect for her and now his boy. Any inconvenience for them rubs him wrong.

  I used to think he was nuts. We all grew up getting kicked around, but we survived. Did his woman and kid really need a protective bubble around them?

  Yeah, I guess they do. After all, I never want anything bad touching my girl.

  As Who’s “Won’t Get Fooled Again” begins to play over the Ranch’s speakers, I catch sight of the Suttons’ dark blue SUV arriving at the Ranch. Cameo appears first, scanning the people for me. When her gaze meets mine, she holds nothing back. Her smile is a prize I’m willing to jump through fiery hoops to keep.

  CAMEO—WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE

  Hagan chooses to wear overalls and literally begs me to wear mine, too. She’s gotten incredibly clingy since I started talking about moving into Mad Dog’s house after graduation.

  “If we match, people will know we’re together,” Hagan says that morning.

  “What if we match by wearing jeans and T-shirts?”

  Hagan just stares into my eyes, unable to find a reason why my idea isn’t acceptable. Finally, she mutters, “It’s a little boy’s party, and you want to dress like a whore. Just great.”

  Giving in to her will, I arrive at the Ranch in my overalls, dark blue Keds, and a pink tank top. Hagan stands next to me and frowns.

  “I never considered since we’re dressed the same, people are more likely to compare our looks. Go change.”

  Frowning, I’m ready to complain. Suddenly, she laughs. “Just kidding. We’re cheerleaders, dumbass. We’re often dressed the same and compared and judged and heckled.”

  “Oh, yeah. Then, why give me shit?”

  Hagan puts on her overly serious expression. “I’m nervous about embarrassing Phil and Arlene.”

  “Funny,” Mom says, standing in her best semi-dressy shirt-and-jeans combo. “Don’t wander off.”

  After spotting Mad Dog near the bounce house, I catch his gaze. He looks so sexy, wearing a simple white tank and jeans painted on his fine body. When I smile at him, he offers me a smirk I feel between my legs.

  “Do you mean wander off with a few bikers?” Hagan teases Arlene and wraps her arm through mine. “No, I’m saving myself for a nerd.”

  “Is that a crack at me?” Phil asks as we walk from the visitor parking lot to the party area.

  “You’re not a nerd,” Hagan says, giggling at his fake anger. “You’re a big-brained accountant.”

  “Super stud,” Arlene whispers and gives his ass a pat before we reach the bikers near a larger group of strangers with kids.

  Being nerds, my parents spent last night studying up on the names and relationships of the people living at the Ranch. We even got out the Pictionary whiteboard and made a game of it.

  As my family approaches, Mad Dog peels away from his bros. Soon, he wraps an arm around my shoulders, forcing Hagan to grudgingly free me and switch to clinging to Arlene.

  “Miss me?” Mad Dog asks as always.

  “I saw you less than twenty-four hours ago,” I whisper, and he nearly pouts. “Of course, I missed you.”

  Smirking again, he kisses me as chastely as possible with our audience.

  Hagan introduces the Wet Dicks and the Ranch family, getting half of their names wrong. This encourages Ginette to correct her with too much irritated emphasis. Hagan can’t tell if she should challenge the older woman. I snap at my friend, who responds to the gesture with the same expression as Bane.

  “Can I show your house to Mom, Dad, and Hagan?” I ask Mad Dog after sensing my father is intimidated by the six large tatted bikers.

  Over the last week, I’ve noticed how often men adjust their stance around Mad Dog. Whether we go to the store, a restaurant, or he picks me up at school, my sexy biker freaks out smaller, weaker guys.

  Now, Phil gives off the same uneasy vibe. Mad Dog might sense the same thing, or he just wants to make me happy. Either way, he takes my hand and gestures for my family to follow him.

  The bikers’ attentions turn to the bounce house, where kids scream a little too loudly. I sense drama brewing with the wee ones.

  “This is your house?” Arlene asks, suspicious as soon as we step on the porch.

  Mad Dog nods. “All the houses are basically the same floor plan. We have extra houses sitting empty from when we had more club members.”

  As we walk through the front door to the cinnamon-scented house, Hagan leans into me and whispers, “This is where you lost your cherry.”

  We share a grin, and I point to the back of the house. Arlene might sense our topic since she starts wearing her “something stinks” expression.

  “Can you imagine coming over for dinner and me cooking for you?” I ask my mom while holding Mad Dog’s hand. “It could become a weekly thing.”

  I look at him to make sure I’m not making promises he won’t want to keep.

  “I rarely eat in the house. I don’t think the dining room’s been used at all. Was never sure why I had one? Now, it’ll have a use.”

  We share a smile. I’m so sure my parents will feel better after seeing how I won’t live in a dump or drug den. Rather than relief, Arlene starts crying.

  “I need to use the bathroom,” she says, and a scolded-looking Mad Dog gestures toward the correct door.

  “Why?” I ask Phil, getting emotional while Hagan hugs me.

  “It’s like visiting the college where your child will live away from you. Her emotional state is completely normal.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes. My mom cried when we visited colleges in my senior year of high school. It’s a parent thing.”

  Wiping my eyes, I smile at him. “I thought she didn’t like the bungalow.”

  “It’s a solid house,” Phil says and nods at Mad Dog. “Can’t imagine many people would have the testicular fortitude to bother you out here, either.”

  Mad Dog’s pouty face shifts immediately at the idea of anyone fucking with me.

  “No one starts trouble on the Ranch.”

  “Very manly,” Hagan says and walks toward the kitchen. “Do you have anything to drink?”

  “A few things. Not much. I rarely eat in the house. There’s a community building with a kitchen and hang-out spot. That’s where I normally am,” he says and then adds, “But I’ll keep the kitchen stocked when Cameo moves in.”

  Hagan waves off his explanation. “So, that’s about the future. Right now, you have beer and water as options. I can’t drink either one because of my age and lack of interest.”

  A scowling Mad Dog stomps over to the fridge to find two kinds of soda plus bottles of ice tea.

  Hagan just smiles. “You’re stealing my bestie. Expect some pushback, big guy.”

  Mad Dog smirks. “Understood. Maybe when you’re grown up like Cameo, you can hook up with one of my bros. Then, you and your bestie will be together at the Ranch.”

  “I don’t know about that,” Phil mutters, looking constipated.

  “Why is Cameo allowed to ride a biker, but I can’t?” Hagan cries dramatically. “You’re showing favoritism.”

  Phil just rolls his eyes at her fake gripe. A knock at the front door draws our attention, and Mad Dog finds an irritated Raqui.

  “There you are,” she tells me. “I need you and the other one to come with m
e.”

  “No,” Mad Dog says immediately.

  “Don’t start. I require chick power. Go wow her parents with your extensive knowledge of whatever you know. I want to say beer and motorcycles. Those topics ought to be fine,” she says and then focuses on me and Hagan, who peeks over my shoulder. “Will you two please come with me?”

  While I consider telling her no, Raqui’s appearance breaks my resolve. Her pretty face is beet red, her hair is windblown, her belly seems bigger, and her son is turning two. The weird panic radiating from her won’t allow me to say no.

  “We’ll be right back,” I tell Phil, who eyes the bathroom where Arlene remains.

  “Don’t go far.”

  When Mad Dog prepares to come with us, Hagan pats his chest.

  “Protect the parents with your muscles. I’ll watch out for Cameo.”

  He grins as if she’s his bratty little sister. It’s a smile I often wear.

  Leaving my man to entertain my parents, I follow Raqui outside and hope her drama doesn’t ruin an otherwise pleasant day.

  MAD DOG—JUST WHAT I NEEDED

  Under normal circumstances, I’d figure Raqui was pulling a bitch-move by stealing away Cameo and Hagan and leaving me with the Sutton parents. However, Grizz’s woman really wants more young chicks on the Ranch to keep her company. Plus, she looked overwhelmed-as-fuck. And it’s her kid’s birthday. Can’t imagine her playing a prank today.

  But none of Raqui’s well-meaning crap changes how I’m stuck with an awkward Phil and a still hiding Arlene.

  “She isn’t close with her family or old friends,” I tell Phil while we stand in the family room. “They’re only here, so Cross will have someone to play with on his birthday.”

  “Arlene wasn’t all that fond of Hagan’s mom back in the day, but Jaya lived down the street, and we wanted playdates for Cameo with a well-behaved kid.”

  “Well-behaved, huh?” I say, smirking about the little troublemaker.

  Phil grins. “Hagan was really shy as a little girl. She used to follow her mom around everywhere. While she adored that woman, I never got the feeling Jaya adored her back.”

  “Some people shouldn’t be parents.”

  Nodding, Phil takes our agreement as an excuse to relax a little more. “I sensed Jaya knew she made a mistake by having Hagan. She and Arron weren’t built for parenthood.”

  “Neither were my parents. But I never got lucky enough to be taken in by good people like yourself. Cameo and Hagan would be very different women if they got stuck with their original parents.”

  Nodding again, Phil clearly likes the praise. He’s one of those lame dads who actually enjoys spending time with his kids. Grizz is the same way, which surprised the hell out of me. I thought he only had the boy to keep Raqui happy.

  “It’ll always be a little strange for me,” Phil says, stumbling over his words and getting awkward again. “Cameo doesn’t hide much from us. If you two have problems, we’ll hear about it. Then, she’ll forgive you, and we’ll still be mad about what she got over. That’s how things work in our house.”

  “I don’t mind you holding grudges as long as it means I can keep Cameo with me while she enjoys a close relationship with your family.”

  Phil settles a little. “It’s like cheerleading, I guess. Cameo and Hagan trash-talk the other girls. Just venting, nothing too serious. But every time I go to a game and watch the girls cheer, I’d spend a lot of time remembering how one girl made fun of Cameo or another was mean to Hagan. I can’t let those issues go, just because the girls do.”

  “Hell, I couldn’t do that, either. When assholes mess with those I care about, I take it real personal. Only a few people mean anything to me. Once I care, I never let things slide.”

  Phil grins as if we’re not so different. Our shared moment ends when the bathroom door opens.

  Her face pink from crying, Arlene looks around for the girls.

  “They’re helping out Raqui,” Phil explains, and his woman nods.

  Then, her light brown eyes find me. “It’s not personal,” Arlene says and takes Phil’s hand. “I’m sure you think I don’t like you.”

  Shrugging as if I don’t mind, I reply, “I’m not the guy you had in mind for Cameo.”

  “No, but she’s always been honest about her feelings for you. We know what kind of man you are. At least with her.”

  “Then, why does being here today bother you so much?”

  “I figured I had more time,” Arlene mumbles, sounding ready to cry again. “Cameo coming into our life felt like a miracle. She was such a sweet baby. As a little girl, she loved spending time with us. When she got older, we kept waiting for the ‘You’re not my real parents’ freak-outs or teenage rebellion. We know the girls messed around with boys, smoked pot, and drank at parties. But neither one ever went wild. They stayed close to home. Most weekends, Cameo and Hagan were with us rather than out partying.”

  Arlene gives Phil a sad look. “With Hagan still in school, Cameo didn’t seem in any hurry to move out like our friends’ kids do. She doesn’t like school, so college wasn’t in her future. Cameo planned to live at home and work at Phil’s office. Everything would stay the same for another year, at least.”

  When Arlene falls silent, I finish for her. “Then, she met me.”

  “And now everything is moving so fast. Cameo never races into stuff. She hesitates a lot. But with you, she’s been in a full sprint.”

  With most people, I never defend or explain myself. I’ve been my own man for a long fucking time. Making nice with a girl’s parents hasn’t been on my radar since, shit, maybe junior high.

  But Arlene and Phil are Cameo’s family, and she’s my woman. I can’t avoid them like Grizz does Raqui’s people. So, yeah, I’ll have to help the Sutton parents adjust to the new reality I’m rushing to share with their daughter.

  “I ought to be patient,” I say, feeling guilty under Arlene’s sad gaze. “But I was one of those kids in a hurry to get away from their parents. My only righteous family is with the Dicks, and that came with a lot of struggles. But with Cameo, everything’s been easy and perfect from the beginning. I don’t feel right anymore when she isn’t with me.”

  Forcing a smile, Arlene nods. “I know Cameo isn’t an academically strong person. She hates school. Even community college would be tough for her. I also know she’s beautiful and warm. A part of me always understood the way for Cameo to have a comfortable life was to find a man to take care of her. That sounds old-fashioned, but it’s just reality.”

  After pausing to peek out the front window to ensure Cameo isn’t eavesdropping, Arlene glances around the house. “I’m aware of how you make your money. But you don’t seem to get into trouble. And you have this nice house, and I believe you’ll take care of Cameo. That’s what I want for her. To be safe and happy. Even after all these years, I still remember her as a tiny baby thrown away in that dumpster.”

  Arlene and Phil share a mournful look over a long-ago pain.

  “Our baby needs a better life than she can get on her own,” Arlene continues. “I have plenty of friends from high school working terrible jobs and living in unsafe places. I got to go to college and meet Phil. A good life can be no more than a few lucky moments changing your path. I can’t pretend I don’t want to keep Cameo at home forever. However, I feel as if her meeting you was one of those lucky moments.”

  Taken back by her words, I admit, “That might be one of the nicest things anyone’s ever said to me.”

  “Then, you need better people around, Mad Dog,” Arlene says and shoots me the same “mom look” I’ve seen her give Cameo. “You should get used to us meddling in your life. Cameo will never stop being our baby.”

  Nodding, I explain, “On our first date, she told me I needed to care about her people, and she would do the same for mine. That’s when I knew she was more than just a pretty face.”

  Phil smiles softly, thinking of his daughter sticking up for her family. He
looks at Arlene, who relaxes now that she’s said her piece.

  I honestly expected today to go differently. Mainly, I figured the Sutton parents would give my lifestyle the stink-eye and try to make me feel like a loser.

  With Arlene and Phil now cool with Cameo living here, I don’t know how to react. I’m so used to normal folks acting as if I’m a dirty bastard ruining their nice town. Acceptance feels like a prank.

  “Last night, I thought about how scared Cameo might be when she moves into the house,” I say as we wait for the girls to return. “Maybe you two and Hagan could stay over for the weekend. If you’re nearby, Cameo can get used to being here without feeling too homesick.”

  Arlene’s gaze brightens immediately while Phil nods approvingly. These people are my age, but I get the same awkward vibe as when teenage-me dealt with adults.

  Despite my earlier worries, I can’t deny these two are warming up to their daughter’s future with me on the Ranch.

  CAMEO—BIG GIRLS DON’T CRY

  Raqui steps off Mad Dog’s porch to allow more privacy before she stops and rubs her baby bump. Her gaze flashes back to the party. “Fat Bottomed Girls” plays over the speakers, inspiring Hagan to bob her head to the beat. Finally, Raqui frowns at us.

  “What’s wrong?” I ask.

  “My cousins are hassling me. I can’t ask Grizz for help since he’ll overreact and bury them.”

  “For real?” Hagan asks, eyes widening. “So, if I freak out or start trouble, he’ll bury me?”

  “Sure,” Raqui says and shrugs. “But you’re not the problem. I just need some girl power to deal with my cousins ganging up on me.”

  “What can we do?” I ask, unsure of what girl power we possess besides snarky comments and dismissive glances.

  Raqui rubs her belly again. “Can either of you fight?”

  “No,” I say while Hagan nods.

  “We took fighting classes at school,” my bestie bullshits.