It's Raining Men

by Julie Hammerle

“That was because I’d just told Mark that we couldn’t be together—that it’d be too hard with him in Galena and me in Chicago.” She looked me right in the eye. “You know what I realized when you and I went out that night?”

  I shook my head.

  “Who fucking cares if it’s hard? Even harder than that would be life without Mark.”

  I pressed my lips together.

  “So I went home and called him, and he asked me to marry him. I was willing to uproot my life to be with him. You’re already halfway there, bringing a new doctor into your practice. You’re suddenly going to have all kinds of time to follow him on the road wherever he goes. So let’s go find this guy and tell him you’re willing to do the work.” She paused. “Where is he?”

  I shook my head. “I don’t know. He left without telling me where he was going, and we haven’t talked since.”

  “Maybe he’s still putting in hours at the bar,” Yessi said.

  Since my tolerance was extremely low, maybe the wine was getting to me. I was starting to believe that this wasn’t the worst idea. Dax and I had definitely cared about each other once; maybe we could again. At the very least, I could find him and tell him that I was sorry and that I was wrong, and I’d be willing to give things a shot with him.

  I stood and raised my fist in the air. “To O’Leary’s Barn!”

  Chapter Forty-Five

  Angry Nerds

  “I don’t know where he is,” Peter the bartender said. “I’m sorry. He’s off tonight.”

  I waved a twenty in front of him. “Can you tell me where his sister’s apartment is?”

  His eyes followed the bill. “No, I can’t.”

  Yessi flashed another twenty. “Maybe you can run to the manager’s office and look in his employment file.”

  “Yessi!” I said.

  “What?” she said. “We just want the address.” She looked right at Peter. “You know us, Paul—”

  “Peter,” I said.

  “Peter,” Yessi corrected herself.

  Kelly slid him yet another twenty. “Peter, you don’t know me, but it’s my bachelorette party tonight, and Annie is my maid of honor.”

  “Congratulations.”

  “Thanks. Annie just wants to tell Dax how much he means to her.”

  Peter looked at me, frowning. “Really?”

  I nodded.

  He straightened his shoulders. “Then I’ll do it.”

  “Really?” I said. “Thanks, Peter.”

  “I’m only doing it because I know how sad Dax has been since you broke up. I hope you two can work things out.”

  I shot him a grateful smile. Damn, for someone who thought she was doomed to loneliness, I sure had a lot of people who cared for me when I stopped to look. I wouldn’t discount them again.

  Kelly started to slide her twenty back toward her, and Peter pressed his hand on the bill to stop her.

  “But I still want the money.”

  Dax’s sister, Lily, lived only a few blocks from the bar. We took the limo over there and all went up to the door to knock. I could hear a dog barking inside.

  A few moments later, Lily answered the door. Surprised, she looked from me to Yessi to Kelly, a questioning expression on her face. Finally, she stopped on me. “Annie?”

  “Yes.” I smiled. “Hi. We’re looking for Dax.”

  “Oh…he’s not here.”

  I glanced inside, scanning her apartment. Something occurred to me. “Where’s Joanne? Why isn’t she coming to the door?”

  “She has to stay in my room,” Lily said, “because of Travis’s allergies. She’s only allowed out on her way to and from the outside door for her walks.”

  “Like prison,” Yessi muttered.

  “Well,” Lily said, glowering at Yessi, “this is the situation we’re in. What else are we supposed to do with her?”

  “Lily,” I said, “do you know where Dax is?”

  She folded her arms across her chest. “Why do you want to know?”

  “I…I just want to talk to him.”

  She stared me down. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

  “Well, you don’t get to decide that,” Yessi said, stepping forward. “Dax is an adult, and he chooses whom he speaks to.”

  “Maybe,” she said, “but I know where he is, and you don’t.” She glared at me. “You broke his heart,” she said. “He’s in the middle of the most important time in his music career, and all he can think about is how sad he is now that you’re gone.” She glared at Yessi. “So, no, I won’t be telling you where you can find him.”

  Behind Lily I heard someone sneeze—probably Travis, the roommate. Lily was right to be upset with me. Because things hadn’t worked out between Dax and me, she was now in a very uncomfortable living situation…one I could actually make a little bit better.

  “If I promise to take Joanne off your hands, will you tell us where Dax is?”

  Lily glanced behind her. Again Travis sneezed.

  “Dax doesn’t want to be away from her,” she said. “He’s worried about her.”

  “I know,” I said, “but he trusts me with her. I know all about her walking regimen and her pill schedule.”

  “I thought you didn’t have time for a dog.”

  “Right, I didn’t,” I said, “but my circumstances have changed. I’ve brought in someone to help at work, plus”—I gestured to Yessi—“my best friend’s wife is a vet—the one who looked at Joanne recently—so she’ll be in good hands.”

  I straightened up. This was the right thing to do, and, more than that, it was what I wanted to do. I felt great about the progress we’d made with our walks, and I’d keep her moving for as long as she could handle it. I liked to take care of people (and animals) who were sick and needed help maintaining their medical regimen. If I were able and had an army of Annie clones at my disposal, I’d move into all my patients’ houses and make sure they were taking their meds. In my own home, I could micromanage Joanne’s care.

  Lily looked me up and down. “Okay,” she said, “but just because Travis is about to throw us all out and Dax is leaving on tour soon and still hasn’t figured out what to do with her. I’ll go get Joanne.” Lily padded down the hallway.

  “Is she really giving away her brother’s dog without asking him?” Kelly said.

  “I…think so…?” said Yessi.

  “We’ll tell him all about it when we see him tonight.” I grinned. “Besides, if all goes well, he’ll be moving back in, too, at least until he leaves on tour.”

  Yeah, that was still an issue, and I hadn’t figured out in my mind how we’d cross that hurdle. But I wasn’t going to do the Annie thing and overthink it. No, tonight was about honesty and telling Dax how I felt. What he chose to do with that information was up to him.

  Lily came back with Joanne and handed me the leash. She gave Kelly a box full of food and supplies. “Thank you,” she said, “for taking the dog.”

  “My pleasure,” I said. “I’ll take good care of Joanne.”

  She handed me a slip of paper with an address on it. “Here’s the club where Dax is playing tonight.”

  “Great!” I said, reading it over. “Wonderful!” I waved the paper in the air. “Thanks, Lily! Come on, Joanne!”

  I carefully led Joanne down the steps and out to the limo. Hopefully the driver wouldn’t mind the dog in the car. Eh, we’d give him a big tip at the end of the night and offer to get the car cleaned—

  “By the way,” Lily shouted from the steps.

  I turned around.

  She pointed to my hand. “That’s a private club, so good luck getting in!” She gave us a big wave.

  I followed Yessi and Kelly into the car. Yessi was already convincing the driver that he should let Joanne take a ride. I handed the paper with the address to Kelly
. “Well, this is a bust.”

  She looked at it. “What? Why?”

  “Because it’s a private club. You probably have to know a password or at least know somebody who knows somebody.”

  Yessi turned around and slunked back into her seat. “Wait,” she said. “You do know somebody who knows somebody.” She raised her eyebrows.

  “Who?”

  “You know somebody who knows everybody.” She checked out Kelly’s and my blank faces. “Come on, you two. The Man on Main Street…?”

  “No.” Yessi had to be kidding with this.

  Kelly squeezed my arm. “Yes! Of course.”

  “You said Darius could get in anywhere,” Yessi said. “Let’s see if that’s true. Come on, Annie. He’s our only hope.”

  She had me there. “I’ll need my phone.”

  Kelly reached into her purse and handed it to me.

  I watched it in my hand as it turned on, worried how Darius would respond to a request like this, if he’d even entertain the idea of getting me in. I’d recently turned down his proposal, he didn’t believe Dax and I were a good idea, and then there was the whole unsavory part where I was calling him out of the blue to ask for a favor, which I hated doing even under the best circumstances. “I don’t know,” I said. “Maybe we should cut our losses. I should probably get Joanne home, anyway.”

  “Nope.” Kelly grabbed my phone. “Uh-uh. This is my bachelorette party, and what I say goes. You’re calling Darius, and we’re getting into that club.” She pressed a few buttons on my phone and handed it to me.

  I took it from her like it was a bomb about to explode. The phone rang in my ear. Once…twice…

  “Annie?” His rich baritone hit my eardrum.

  “Darius?” I squeaked.

  “Good lord,” Yessi muttered. “This will go well.”

  My eyes shot her daggers.

  “Is anything wrong?” he asked.

  “No.” I checked my vocal pitch level. “No,” I repeated at a lower frequency. I sighed. “I hate to ask this, but I’m with my girlfriends for a bachelorette party, and the bride really wants to get into this club…”

  Kelly shot me a thumbs-up and nodded. “Well played.”

  “Congrats to your friend!” he said cheerfully. “Which club?”

  “Um…I only have the address… Wait a second.”

  Yessi typed it into her phone and showed it to me.

  “The club is called…” I squinted at the phone. “…Isolate?”

  Darius was silent on the other end.

  “Have you heard of that place?” I laughed. “Of course you have. You know all the hot spots in t—”

  “Is this really your friend asking?”

  I glanced up at Kelly. “Yes?”

  “Because that’s Monica Feathers’s club, and Farouche is playing there tonight.”

  Shit.

  “Annie, I thought you were moving on from him,” Darius said. “I thought we agreed that he’d never be able to give you the commitment you wanted.”

  “Yeah,” I said. “We did, and I was.” I straightened my shoulders. “But since we talked, I decided that I’m okay without the commitment. I’m focusing on myself and what makes me happy. Dax makes me happy.”

  Kelly clapped her hands with glee.

  “And maybe I’ll show up there tonight and find out he doesn’t agree, or maybe we get back together and it doesn’t last. At least I’ll know I put myself out there and gave it a shot.” I paused. “Darius, a friend of ours just died. I think we both can see now how life is too short not to even try to be with the person you love. What Would Gayle Gale Do?”

  I could hear him breathing on the other end.

  “Darius?” My own breath caught in my lungs as I waited for his response.

  “I’ll meet you there in twenty minutes.”

  Chapter Forty-Six

  That’s So Ravenclaw

  Twenty minutes later, we parked outside the club. Yessi, taking one for the team, said she’d stay back in the limo with Joanne.

  Darius walked toward us, carrying flowers.

  Oh my goodness, he hadn’t gotten the hint. He thought What Would Gayle Gale Do meant “propose to Annie again.”

  “Hey, Darius,” I said warily. “Nice flowers.”

  He shook them a little but did not attempt to hand them to me.

  “This is my friend Kelly,” I said. “She’s the bride.”

  He flashed her his TV-news-guy smile. “Nice to meet you, and congratulations!”

  “Thanks!” She beamed.

  “Should we go in?” I said.

  “One moment.” He gestured for me to join him a few steps away.

  I sent SOS eyes to Kelly. This was about to go sideways. Darius was going to try, again, to convince me why Dax and I shouldn’t be together, and that he and I should. She just waved.

  “This may be premature,” he said, “but I want to thank you.”

  “Thank me?” By offering me this ring…

  He smiled. “You convinced me I was wrong about something—a rare feat.” He chuckled, but then his eyes turned serious. “For the past several days, ever since Gayle passed”—his voice turned heavy with emotion—“I haven’t been myself. I’ve been moping around, eating cookies, and watching silly TV shows.” He shook his head. “Pathetic.”

  “Not pathetic,” I said. “A normal part of the grieving process.” And most of my evenings for the past twenty years.

  “I miss my friend, my mentor, of course,” he said, “but I started to realize that the hole inside me was there even before she died.” He frowned and glanced down at the flowers. “I thought denying my emotions was the safe way to deal with them. I came to the logical conclusion that even having emotions was weak and pathetic and should be avoided at all costs. But then I saw Monica at the funeral, and I realized the feelings weren’t gone. They were just hiding.”

  I grinned. “I knew it when I saw you two together. The energy bouncing between you.” I patted his arm. “She loves you, too, Darius.”

  He smiled. “We’ll see. Even if she does, we’ll have a lot of work to do. We’re both very ambitious.”

  “I can see that,” I said.

  “But it will be worth it.”

  “Yes, it will be.”

  He gave me a hug, and I knew he’d be okay.

  Darius led Kelly and me into the club and over to the roped-off VIP section. Farouche was onstage and in the middle of their set. Dax, already sweaty, focused hard on his fellow musicians.

  He looked serious, obviously, and focused, but there was more to it than that. He had a gleam in his eye. He looked like how I felt at a trivia tournament or my mom when she was doing WERQ. He was in the zone, happy, and complete.

  He had a real shot to truly make it—to achieve all his goals.

  Kelly nudged me in the side. “Look at Dax go.”

  “He’s talented, right?”

  “Amazing.”

  A lump in my throat, I watched him up there living his dream, performing his heart out. He had worked his entire life for this. His marriage had failed because of it, and suddenly I just knew.

  I couldn’t put that same amount of pressure on him now. I’d already achieved so much in my own career. I’d been allowed to do that.

  I had to let Dax do the same.

  “What are you going to say to him when you see him?”

  I shrugged, blinking back tears. “I…don’t know.”

  After Farouche finished playing, Darius, with Monica Feathers on his arm, led us backstage. Dax, once again, had unzipped his costume down to the waist and was talking to Kat’s girlfriend. I fought my body’s urge to bolt.

  Finally, as if he sensed me there, he turned toward the door. I gave him a little wave, and he stepped over, zipping up
his jumpsuit on the way. “You’re here,” he said. “What are you doing here?”

  I gestured to Kelly. “Remember Kelly? It’s her bachelorette party.”

  Dax gave her a nod.

  “Can we talk a sec?” I asked.

  His brow furrowed. “Yeah.”

  He led me out of the dressing room and down a long hall toward an exit. We stopped right inside the door, the moonlight from outside the door illuminating his eyes. They were so beautiful, and I couldn’t do this.

  I had to do this.

  “I came to tell you something.”

  He folded his arms, watching me, his bisected eyebrow arched.

  “I came to tell you I love you—”

  A smile played on his lips.

  “But I’m not going to do that.”

  A grin full-on took over his face. “I think you just did.”

  “No, I didn’t.”

  “Agree to disagree.”

  I sighed. “Let me finish, please, Yale, okay?”

  He leaned against the wall.

  “I came to tell you I love you, but then I decided not to do it, because it wouldn’t be fair to you.” I paused to let him interject. When he didn’t, I kept going. “You’re so, so talented, Dax, and I don’t want to get in the way of that, even a little bit.”

  “You won’t.”

  “I will.” I shook my head. “You have a great opportunity in front of you, and your entire career has been building to this. Most people don’t even get this chance.”

  He frowned. “No, they don’t.”

  I stepped toward him and reached up to play with the zipper on his jumpsuit. “So, that’s why I came to tell you this. Not that I love you, even though I do—”

  He tilted my chin up and gazed into my eyes. “I love you, too.”

  Hiding my watery gaze from him, I focused on the zipper. I had to keep going. I, Dr. Annie Kyle, the queen of pragmatism, had to do what I’d been training my whole life to do—put my feelings aside. Only this time, it was for the good of someone else, not to keep myself from being hurt. “I came to tell you that because I love you, I want all the best for you. I want you to go create all the music with Monica Feathers and make a gazillion dollars.”