Privilege

by Kate Brian

  "All good?" he asked.

  He even had a sexy voice. Ariana's smile widened. "All--"

  "Oh my God! Let's go already!"

  Briana Leigh yanked one last time on Ariana's arm, and before Ariana could take one more look at the gorgeous waiter, he was swallowed up by the crowd.

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  HUDSON

  "I just don't get it. There are perfectly good schools here in Texas. Why does everyone feel the need to go to the Northeast? Like just because the schools have been there forever, they're innately better. That is totally backward thinking. Those schools are stuck in the past! They're archaic. And I, for one, like new. Progressive. Old school can kiss my ass."The more alcohol Briana Leigh imbibed, the more crap spewed out of her mouth, and Ariana was starting to get tense. She smoothly pulled her cell phone out of her purse to check the time. It was a quarter to one. The band for which this party was being thrown had long since taken the stage, so where was Briana Leigh's beloved Teo? Ariana had been counting the minutes until he found them so he could bear some of the Briana Leigh burden.

  "Where do you go to school, Emma?" Briana Leigh asked, taking a sip of her cocktail.

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  "Oh. I haven't decided where to go this fall," Ariana said. "But I know where I won't be going. I won't be going to Atherton-Pryce Hall."

  She added this last bit just to distract Briana Leigh from prodding her further about her education. And it worked.

  "I'll drink to that!" Briana Leigh said, lifting her glass to Ariana's. "Screw Atherton-Pryce Hall!"

  "Screw Atherton-Pryce Hall!" Ariana echoed. Then she pretended to take a swig of her drink.

  "What was that?" Briana Leigh said, narrowing her eyes. "Take a real drink."

  "I did!" Ariana protested.

  "Oh, please. You've barely had anything to drink since we got here," Briana Leigh said, waving a hand at Ariana. "Have you not noticed we're at a party?"

  "This is my third martini!" Ariana lied, her eyes wide.

  Briana Leigh rolled her eyes and trained her attention on the stage, crossing her slim, tan legs at the knee. The truth was that since Ariana and Briana Leigh had arrived at their VIP section--basically a roped-off set of ten seats in the balcony--Ariana had been nursing the same iridescent martini. The last thing she needed, given her precarious situation, was to have her logic impaired. Briana Leigh, of course, harbored no such qualms. Which was surprising. After all, Briana Leigh had some pretty dark secrets to protect.

  Ariana glanced sideways at her benefactress. The girl could barely hold herself upright in the theater seat, and had to keep resting her

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  cheek on her hand. Was she wasted enough to share a little info about her bank accounts? Subtlety, Ariana decided, was key.

  "So, Briana Leigh, if all your friends are away, why didn't you go with them? I mean you obviously have the money to--"

  "Teo!"

  Briana Leigh jumped out of her seat so fast she almost tipped forward and plunged over the edge of the balcony. Heart in her throat, Ariana lunged from her chair and grabbed the girl's arm, pulling her upright. Briana Leigh laughed as she righted herself and Ariana rolled her eyes. She turned to find DJ Teo jogging down the steps toward the front row, girls on all sides checking him out and whispering to each other as he moved along. Ariana had to admit that, in an empiric sense, Teo was not unattractive. He was on the shorter side--maybe five-foot-eight--but had broad shoulders and large hands. With olive skin, dark hair shorn close to his head, and gleaming black eyes, he definitely had the exotic thing going for him. Plus, there was an easy confidence about him as he slapped hands with fans and signed autographs and smiled for photos, which Ariana admired.

  Still, he was not her type. Ariana had always been into the more mysterious, tall, slender guys. She didn't do stocky and charismatic. Plus, his sneakers were way too tattered for her taste.

  "Teo! Teo! Over here! Will you take a picture with me?"

  A buxom blond girl who was falling out of her blouse grabbed Teo and shoved her camera at her friend. As the two of them posed, the girl made sure to press her ample breasts up against Teo's chest and pull his cheek to hers. Next to Ariana, Briana Leigh bristled.

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  "Hey! Get your own man, slut!" she shouted, leaning into the seat.

  The girl didn't even hear Briana Leigh, what with the deafening music and the fact that she was a few yards off, but the people closer to their section laughed and pointed. Ariana cursed under her breath and pulled Briana Leigh back.

  "Calm down. You're making a scene," Ariana whispered to her, almost feeling embarrassed on her behalf.

  Briana Leigh huffed but didn't argue. She crossed her arms over her chest and waited with a pout until Teo was finally finished greeting his public.

  "Hey, baby," he said, sliding his hand under the thick blanket of Briana Leigh's hair. He went in for a kiss, but Briana Leigh turned her face.

  "What was that?" she demanded.

  "What?" Teo said with a satisfied smile that told Ariana he knew exactly what Briana was talking about.

  "That!" Briana Leigh flung an arm toward the fan who was sitting a few rows back, checking out the pics on the camera screen. "You were all over her!"

  Teo slipped both hands around Briana Leigh's neck and tickled her cheekbones with his thumbs. He clucked his tongue and tilted his head as he looked into her eyes. "Aw, baby, come on. You know you're the only woman for me."

  Briana Leigh's pout quickly turned into a smile, and then Teo pulled her to him and stuck his tongue right down her throat. Ariana looked away. Too disgusting for public viewing.

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  "Teo, this is Emma Walsh," Briana Leigh said, breaking away for a moment.

  Ariana was ready with a polite smile, but Teo simply looked her over, said, "S'up?" and recommenced slobbering all over his girlfriend. Ariana sat down hard in her seat and swigged the last dregs of her now warm martini. She wasn't sure which was worse--listening to Briana Leigh babble or watching these two dry hump each other. Either way, this was going to be a very long night.

  Just then someone dropped into the seat next to Ariana's, jostling her elbow from the armrest. She looked up, annoyed, and instantly recognized the arm. Her heart did a triple backflip. Hot waiter boy.

  "Hey," he said with a grin as she hazarded a glance into his eyes.

  "Hey." Ariana smiled as well, but couldn't stop herself from pointing out his faux pas. "This is the VIP section, you know."

  His grin widened. "I'm aware. Yo! Teo!"

  Teo broke off his kiss and Briana Leigh face-planted into his chest. He reached over Ariana to slap hands with the waiter. So DJ Teo knew the hired help. Interesting development.

  "Shouldn't you be, like, serving us?" Briana Leigh said with a sneer. She was clutching onto Teo's graphic tee, ostensibly to keep herself upright.

  "My shift just ended," he said. "I figured I'd watch the rest of the set with you guys, if that's okay." He said this last bit to Ariana, as if hers was the only permission he required. She blushed and looked away, focusing on the lead man on the stage, who was bouncing around with his guitar.

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  "I met Hudson up at UT a couple weeks ago at a gig," Teo explained.

  Briana Leigh rolled her eyes. "Whatever." She pulled Teo to her again and mashed her face into his. Hudson smirked, looking at the couple as if they were just two crazy kids in love and he thought it was cute. Ariana suddenly couldn't stop staring at his face. It was so perfect. Not a mark or a blemish or a scar. Just perfect.

  She could use a little perfect in her life.

  "So. What's your name?" Hudson asked Ariana.

  "Ar... Emma," Ariana said, her heart all but stopping. She had been startled by the question, snagged while staring. Hudson, however, didn't seem to notice her slip. For the first time all night Ariana was grateful for the noise. "Emma Walsh," she said. "From Chicago."

  "Well, Emma Walsh from Chicago. I'm Ashley Hudson from Bost
on." He offered his hand, a plain silver band around his thumb. "Nice to meet you."

  "Ashley, huh?"

  "Mom loved Gone with the Wind," he said with a shrug. "I go by Hudson for obvious reasons."

  "I see." Ariana slipped her fingers into his and the warmth of his skin seemed to spread throughout her entire body. Her breath quickened. She looked into his eyes again and they sparkled.

  "Want a drink?" he asked as one of the other waiters stopped by to check on the VIPs.

  Ariana looked up at the hovering guy with his dyed red hair and multiple piercings. No, she did not want another drink. Look at how

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  badly she had almost screwed up on just one. But Hudson was still holding her hand. The pleasant warmth was still humming in her veins. The band had just switched over to a lulling acoustic song. And she had just gotten out of prison, for God's sake. Shouldn't she be allowed to celebrate? Just a bit?

  "Sure," she told Hudson finally. "I'd love one."

  Half an hour later, Ariana was dancing. The music throbbed through her pores. She threw her bare arms over her head, her demure jacket long since lost to the masses, and closed her eyes. Her short hair whipped her face as she turned her head from side to side in time with the beat. All around her people screamed and shouted and laughed. Bodies collided, sweat mingled, drinks were spilled. And Ariana was loving every minute of it.

  Why had it taken so long for her to let go? Letting go felt good. It felt amazing. She was free, after all. And not just free of the Brenda T., but free of herself. How had she not realized this blessing before? She was no longer Ariana Osgood. Nobody here even knew who she was, which meant that nobody here could really judge her. Ariana could do whatever she wanted. And what she wanted right then was to dance.

  Suddenly someone slammed into her side, and Ariana was thrown right into Hudson's arms. He didn't even flinch as the full weight of her body hit him. Even stronger than he looked. Ariana giggled.

  "Whoops. Sorry."

  "Really not a problem," Hudson said with a smile. "At all."

  He made no move to release her. He smelled both musky and Ivory-soap clean. Like a guy who had been working all night and had

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  quickly washed up and changed into a fresh T-shirt before joining his friends. Not every guy would have made such an effort. Ariana stared into his gorgeous eyes and laughed. She was drunk. Drunker than she had been in a very, very long time.

  They started to dance again, and Ariana moved boldly against Hudson, letting her body mesh with his, closer with every beat. Hudson smiled, but didn't seem to know what to do with his hands. He touched her waist briefly, then placed his hands on her shoulders, then gave up and just danced with them at his sides.

  Ariana smiled. She had landed herself a gentleman.

  "So, do you go to UT?" she shouted.

  "No! I was just there for a music theory course," Hudson replied, bending toward her ear. "I'm gonna be a senior up at Harvard Prep."

  Ariana nodded, impressed. A pre-Harvard boy.

  "What about you?" he asked.

  "I go to Easton," Ariana replied automatically.

  "Easton Academy? Nice," Hudson said. "That's a good school."

  All the blood in Ariana's body rushed to her face as she realized what she had just said. How could she have made such a stupid mistake? Was it just her knee-jerk need to prove to a Harvard guy that she was worthy?

  Stupid, Ariana. Stupid, stupid, stupid.She felt herself starting to recede into self-hatred, but then another dancer slammed into her from behind and she remembered where she was. What she was doing. This was just a random party on a random night. To Hudson she was just a random girl. He wouldn't

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  even remember her fake name tomorrow, let alone where her fake self supposedly went to school.

  Not every little thing had to have consequences, right?

  "This may be totally out of line, but I have to say it. You, Emma Walsh, are insanely beautiful."

  Ariana pushed away from him with a demure smile. So maybe she didn't need to be blond and blue-eyed to catch attention. "Thank you."

  "Not out of line?" he said, raising his eyebrows.

  Ariana shook her head. "Not at all."

  Hudson tugged on her hand and lowered his lips to hers. She was about to pull away, but then her entire body sank into him. She wrapped her arms around his lean waist and pressed her lips against his. It was a perfect kiss. Warm and searching and soft and gentle. But even more so because of what it meant. It meant she was living. Really and truly living. Part of her had thought this would never happen for her again, that she had experienced her last first kiss all those months ago at Easton. But here she was, her heart palpitating, her skin on fire, her lips buzzing. Ariana smiled behind the kiss. She wished Dr. Meloni and his nevers could see her now.

  "Stay away from me! No! Get off of me!"

  Briana Leigh's voice cut through all the bliss and Hudson pulled away suddenly as a commotion erupted around them. Ariana looked up to find Briana Leigh bearing down on her, shrugging off Teo's pleas as she shoved people out of her path. The girl grabbed Ariana's upper arm in her viselike grip.

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  "We're going."

  "Okay," Ariana said, shooting Hudson a startled look. "Let me just

  "No. We're going now. "

  Briana Leigh pulled on Ariana's arm, but Hudson reached out and snagged Ariana's purse from her hand.

  "Can't leave yet! I have Emma's purse."

  "Give it back to her, waiter boy. I'm not kidding," Briana Leigh snapped.

  Teo arrived at her side. The cocky posturing was gone and he was in full begging mode, palms upturned, posture slack. "Baby, just listen. I have to go. But maybe you could--"

  "Ugh! That's it! I'm outta here!" Briana Leigh turned to Ariana. "You can find your own ride!"

  She shoved through the crowd, disappearing almost instantly, and Ariana felt panic start to rise up through her chest. She couldn't let Briana Leigh out of her sight. If she didn't run after her and act the good friend, the girl might sour and freeze her out. She might not even let her back into her house if Ariana had to get her own cab."Hudson, I'm sorry. I really have to go," she said.

  When she turned to look at him, Hudson had her new cell phone out and was toying with the keyboard. His own cell was in his other hand and he was typing something into that as well.

  "What're you doing?" Ariana demanded, on high alert. What if he noticed there were no contacts in her phone?

  "There," he said, popping the phone back into her bag and handing

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  it over. "Now you have my number and I have yours. This way if you don't call me, I can call you and demand an explanation."

  Ariana was touched, but then she remembered this was a one-night thing. She couldn't have him hanging around. Ariana was in Dallas to make one connection and one connection only. After she got what she wanted out of Briana Leigh, she planned on disappearing. For good.

  She had let her guard down, and this was the result.

  "Talk to you soon," Hudson said, leaning in for a sweet, lingering kiss.

  Ariana's heart was still beating in excitement as she sprinted after Briana Leigh.

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  VULNERABLE SIDE

  "Ibiza! He's going to Ibiza! After giving me all that crap about going to stinking Atherton-Hill Prep because it's so far, he's going half a world away. And he doesn't even know when he's coming back!"Ariana bit her tongue to keep from correcting Briana Leigh on the name of the exclusive boarding school. The girl was trashed and in full-on babble mode, so there was no point. Ariana did her best to remain upright as she supported most of the girl's weight on their way across Briana Leigh's bedroom. One of Briana Leigh's arms was slung around Ariana's neck and the other slapped limply at her side as she teetered in her gorgeous new Louboutins. Ariana had suggested she take them off in the car, which would have made this ridiculous trek so much easier, but the girl had i
nsisted they would only be removed from her cold, dead feet.

  Which Ariana was starting to consider.

  "Here. Bed," Ariana said as they arrived at the foot of Briana Leigh's

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  massive four-poster. She turned Briana Leigh around and dropped her on the end of the bed. Briana Leigh's chunky gold bracelet got caught in Ariana's hair as she started to fall back.

  "Ow!" Ariana blurted, hurtling forward to keep from having a chunk of her hair ripped out.

  "Sorry," Briana Leigh said with a pout as Ariana extricated her hair from the offending accessory. She finally stood up straight and smoothed the front of her dress.

  "No problem," Ariana said. "It's fine."

  "No. It's not. It's not fine," Briana Leigh said, gazing up at the ceiling with her bleary eyes. "Everyone leaves me. No one loves me enough to stick around. Am I that awful?"

  She lifted her head half an inch off the bed to look at Ariana, who was now risking Briana Leigh's wrath by unbuckling the skinny straps on her shoes. Ariana paused, her heart constricting at the suddenly vulnerable expression on Briana Leigh's face. Ariana knew exactly how Briana Leigh felt. Exactly. The one person she had loved more than anyone in the world had left her too. Had not loved her back. And the pain had been unbearable.

  Perhaps she had more in common with Briana Leigh than she had ever bothered to consider.

  "Of course not," Ariana lied in a soothing tone. "You're great."

  She placed Briana Leigh's shoes on the floor next to her dresser and fished a silky nightshirt out of the girl's pajama drawer. Back at the bed she pulled Briana Leigh up by the wrists and slipped the nightshirt over the slumping girl's head. Then, as Briana Leigh tipped even

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  further forward, her head pressed into Ariana's waist, Ariana reached up under the nightshirt and unzipped her dress. As she went through the motions, Ariana felt a pang of nostalgia for Easton and the many nights she, Noelle, and Taylor had done this little dressing-undressing ritual for Kiran. She wondered if her old friend had ever gotten help for her alcoholic tendencies.