A Recipe for Love: A Sweet Collection
Page 7
“What’s wrong? Are you—”
I lift a finger to my lips; tears spilling down my cheeks as I plead for him to be quiet.
Frowning, he comes to a stop and that’s when that god awful sound happens again.
“Yes! Fuck me, harder!”
My eyes close, stomach violently twisting.
A harsh curse leaves Cade, knocking me out of my painful stupor. Unable to listen to any more, I shove the pie at him and get the hell out of there. When I make it outside, I head left, trying to pull in deep breaths through the sobs trapped in my chest.
Calm down, Grace. You don’t have a right to feel this way.
My heart doesn’t listen to my head and those imprisoned sobs break free, tumbling past my lips.
“Grace, wait!” Cade calls, running out of the building. He catches up to me, grabbing my arm. “Let me give you a ride home.” His voice is soft, a complete contradiction to how it normally is.
Wiping my tears, I nod then follow him over to his truck. He’s still holding the pie as he opens the door for me. A pie I shouldn’t have bothered making.
Once I’m situated, he closes the door and climbs in on his side. I rattle off the directions to my house then rest my forehead against my window, the cool glass offering no reprieve to the pain scorching me from the inside out.
I shouldn’t feel this heartbroken, this…betrayed. We were nothin’ more than friends, but for some reason those are the only emotions I’m feeling at the moment.
Cade clears his throat, breaking the heavy silence. “Sorry you had to hear that, Grace.”
“Don’t be. It’s no one’s fault,” I whisper. Actually, it’s a lie. It’s my fault. Had I not pushed him away none of this would have happened.
He grunts. “I doubt that. Most of the time, if there’s a fuck-up, it’s Sawyer’s fault. Trust me, I’ve known him a long time, his egotistical pride can fuck with his judgment.”
Is that why he did this? Because of pride? Did he have to choose her of all people?
I know exactly whose snooty voice that was. How can I forget when I’ve been on the receiving end of it many times as she’s hurtled insults at me. Jenny has always been nothin’ but a nasty bitch to me.
Anger begins creepin’ in, overriding the hurt. “Is it terrible of me to say I hope his dick falls off?” I blurt out, before I can think better of it.
I’m about to apologize for the outburst, knowing it’s a cruel thing to say, especially to his best friend, but I don’t get the chance before a laugh barrels out of Cade. It’s low and rusty, the simple act foreign when it comes to him. Eventually it softens into a smile, and boy what a smile it is. Who knew he was hiding that behind that hard mask of his.
The beauty vanishes in an instant when he catches me watching him. Clearing his throat, he shifts uncomfortably. “No. It’s not awful. I, for one, would find it funny as hell.”
I chuckle but it’s halfhearted, because the truth is, even if it did happen, it wouldn’t make me feel better. It wouldn’t change how hurt I am. “You know, normally I’m a girl who always tries to see the glass half-full, but life just really sucks sometimes.”
“It sure fucking does,” he agrees, his tone hard once again.
I have a feeling if anyone can understand the kind of pain I’ve endured over the last few years it’s Cade. Hidden in his dark eyes, you can see it, a void, a loss, something that’s impossible to fill. I know mine is, without my mama that hole will never be filled.
“It’s good you still try to see the glass half-full, Grace,” he speaks again. “Whatever you do, don’t lose that, because once you do there’s nothing left.” His gaze remains straight ahead but that ever-present pain is there, making my heart ache for whatever happened to him.
When he pulls into my driveway, I take my seat belt off and crawl over to his side, wrapping my arms around his neck. Every muscle in his body stiffens but I don’t let go because sometimes a hug can go a long way.
“My mama always used to say that God never gives you more than you can handle. I personally think that’s a giant load of crap.”
The slightest chuckle vibrates his chest.
“But she was a real smart lady, so I try to stick with that mantra.”
“Sounds like she was,” he says, his tone softer.
Feeling myself close to tears again, I pull back and offer him a small smile before exiting the truck. “Thank you for giving me a ride home. It was awful nice of you.”
“No problem. Do you want your pie back?”
I shake my head. “He should still have it.”
“Did you want me to throw it in his face?” he asks, seeming rather hopeful I say yes.
“That’s all right, but thanks for offerin’.” Before leaving him, I say one more thing. “You should smile more often, Cade. It suits you.”
Closing the truck door, I run into my house and head straight to bed. In the quiet dark is when I really let my tears flow, those awful moans filling my heart and mind until the sun breaks the next morning.
Sawyer
I come awake slowly and wonder why it feels like I’ve been run over by a truck. My eyes drift open then slam back shut, a sharp pain spearing my head.
Groaning, I roll over and hit something. My eyes spring open again and I find a naked chick next to me, one that has regret burning within my blood. It all comes rushing back to me in a flash.
Oh shit!
I shoot out of bed like a fucking rocket, crashing into the wall and it rouses the biggest mistake I’ve ever made.
Jenny sits up with a sleepy smile, dropping the sheet to her waist. “Why are you getting up so early? Come back to bed.”
I shake my head then regret it when the room spins, tilting beneath my feet.
Shit, not a good idea.
“One night, Jenny, remember?” I croak, my throat feeling like sandpaper. “It’s time for you to go.”
Ignoring her sleepy glare, I grab my jeans from the floor and throw them on before walking out. I head into the bathroom to wash up, then make my way into the kitchen, needing some coffee.
Cade sits at the table, his disapproving eyes on me as I reach for a mug from the cupboard above my head.
“Save it. I’m not in the fucking mood,” I grumble, not wanting to hear whatever lecture he’s thinking. I already know what an idiot I am for bringing that crazy bitch back here. Cooper warned me how many damn times, but did I listen? Nope. I let my wounded pride, and drunk ass make a stupid decision.
After filling my cup, I take a hefty sip but the hot contents spew from my mouth when I spot a pie on my counter. A pie I’d know anywhere.
My gaze shifts to Cade, eyes wide. “What the fuck is that?” I ask, pointing at the pie.
“Read the note that’s attached to it.”
Stepping forward, I rip off the folded paper, dread curdling in my gut when I see whom it’s addressed to.
Sexy Sawyer,
This is a brand new pie I created just for you. It’s called Forgiveness Pie. I’m hoping, after you eat it, you will forgive me for being so terrible. I’m sorry I hurt your feelings. You mean an awful lot to me, and I don’t want to lose your friendship.
Please forgive me.
Love,
Grace
I swallow thickly, the sudden knot in my throat excruciating. “Please tell me she gave this to you at the diner?”
I can tell by his expression that’s not the case. “When I got back last night from the gym I found her outside our door about to knock until she heard you fucking someone’s brains out.”
“Fuck!” I drop my head into my hands, shame and guilt snaking through my chest, gripping my heart into a tight vise.
Jesus, I think I’m going to be sick.
A scoff yanks me from my torment. Looking up, I find Jenny reading the note, her lips curled in disgust. “Seriously? She’s pathetic.”
Anger swells in my veins, not just at her but also myself. Grabbing her by the wrist, I jerk he
r closer to me, ripping the note out of her hand. “What did I tell you about saying shit when it comes to her?”
Her eyes grow wide, throat bobbing nervously.
“It’s time for you to leave.” I drag her to the door and thrust her out into the hallway, pointing my finger at her. “Stay away from Grace and keep your mouth shut.” My warning is loud and clear before I slam the door in her face.
She drops her fist on it, giving one solid pound. “You’re a real asshole, Sawyer?”
Yeah, I am. Especially for hurting a girl who is far better than the likes of me. I walk back into the kitchen only to have Cade start in on me.
“It’s bad enough you fuck up, but with her? What part of what Cooper said didn’t sink in?”
“Are you really giving me shit about this? You, of all people?”
I’ll admit I fucked up but he is the last person to judge me considering the torture he inflicts upon himself over Faith.
“I’m the one who drove her home last night and listened to her cry, so I can say whatever the fuck I want to you.”
My anger deflates when I hear she was crying. “I have to fix this.”
“Good luck. However, she did say last night she hopes your dick falls off,” he relays, looking rather amused. “Why don’t you hand that to her on a silver platter? That might help.”
Grunting, I head to my room to change and think of a way to fix it without having to cut my dick off. I can’t lose her friendship. I can’t lose whatever we almost had.
Hours later, I pull up to the diner and still have no clue how I’m going to make this right. My stomach is in fucking knots thinking about how much I hurt her, just like so many others have.
I walk up to the door and find Kayla and Julia as they exit the diner. They come to a hard stop at my approach.
“Hey,” I greet them, waiting for the blast I deserve.
“Sawyer,” Julia replies quietly, disappointment strong in her voice.
It makes me feel even more like shit.
Kayla, however, has no problem telling me exactly how she’s feeling. “Well hello, douchebag.”
Julia gives her a slight elbow but I ignore it, knowing I deserve it.
“How is she?” I ask, my eyes remaining on Julia, since she’s probably the only person who will give me an answer at the moment.
“She’s sad,” she answers honestly. “Especially after Jenny came here and was so cruel.”
I tense. “What do you mean?”
Kayla is the one to answer. “That stupid whore came walking in here earlier to rub it in Grace’s face that the two of you shared her pie this morning, after fucking each other’s brains out.”
An unrelenting fury takes hold of me, my blood pumping violently. “That’s not true. She’s lying.”
“We know that,” Julia says. “I think Grace does too, but it didn’t stop it from hurting her.”
“I fucked up. I know that. I’ll fix it.”
“It’s not going to be easy, Sawyer,” she whispers, her voice growing thick with tears. “It takes a lot for Grace to trust someone and she trusted you easier than anyone else.”
The truth of her words hit me like a painful blow to the chest. I swear I’ve never felt this much fucking guilt in all my life.
“I know but I swear to you, I’m going to fix this. I won’t stop until I make it right again.”
She offers me a sad smile and gives my shoulder a squeeze before walking past me to Kayla’s car.
Taking a deep breath, I step forward and brace myself for what awaits me behind the diner door.
Grace
My heart is heavy as I wipe down the table that Julia and Kayla just left. I’m thankful for their company this morning and even more thankful they were here when Jenny walked in, spewing all her nasty hate. I’m not in any shape to fight with her. Not today.
I head for the kitchen, shoving my towel in my apron and run straight into a brick wall, the breath knocking from me on a whoosh.
Strong arms come around me, holding me steady while my hands clutch a soft T-shirt. A familiar scent penetrates my senses, making my heavy heart skip a beat. I know without looking who the brick wall is. With my stomach in knots, I slowly lift my gaze and connect with a pair of intense green eyes.
“Hi, Cupcake.”
A storm of emotions plagues me at the sound of Sawyer’s deep, smooth baritone. His usual upbeat persona nowhere in sight.
“Hi,” I reply quietly.
Neither of us makes an effort to move from our embrace. Even though I shouldn’t, I can’t help but want to soak in the safety of his arms and find myself zeroing in on his perfect lips.
Lips that were just on Jenny’s.
The reminder is like a bucket of cold water. I tear my gaze away from his handsome face and move to step back but he tightens his hold on me.
“Can we talk?” His soft voice contradicts his fierce expression.
I nod, knowing we can’t avoid having this conversation. “Yeah, I can take a quick break. Come on.”
We head into the back where Mac stands at the grill, filling orders.
“Mind if I take a break?” I ask.
He shoots a cold look Sawyer’s way before his eyes shift back to me, softening with affection. “Not at all, darlin’. Take as much time as you need. Shelly will be all right on her own for a bit.”
“Thanks.” I lead Sawyer out back and open the big steel door, needing the fresh air. My attention is focused on the sunny sky since I’m too nervous to look at the man behind me.
“Has the dog come back?” he asks, breaking the heavy silence.
“Not yet. I’ve been checkin’ every night. I’m worried about him.”
When he doesn’t say anything else, I glance over my shoulder and find him watching me, so many emotions etched across his face.
I hate myself a little more for noticing how good he looks today. Instead of the usual jeans he always wears, he’s sporting black athletic pants and a red T-shirt that stretches across his broad shoulders. A black backwards hat covers his unruly hair, the sleep-mussed strands poking out beneath it, hitting the sharp angles of his handsome face.
My eyes lift back to his and I find him wearin’ a sly grin.
Busted!
Clearing my throat, I look down at the ground, paying special attention to how dirty my white shoes are. “I’m assuming you got my pie?”
“Yeah, I did,” his voice is quiet, thick with regret. Or maybe that’s just wishful thinking on my part.
“Did you eat any of it yet?” Dread tightens my stomach as I think about Jenny’s mean comment this morning.
“No, I didn’t,” he answers, his tone hard—angry. “That bitch lied to you, Grace.”
My head snaps up, surprise infiltrating my chest. It’s not long before I realize he must have run into Julia and Kayla outside.
Nodding, I return my attention to my feet again, hating the awkwardness between us. I decide it’s time to get this over with. “I’m really sorry for what I said yesterday, Sawyer. I let my humiliation run my mouth. I didn’t mean it.”
“You don’t need to apologize, Cupcake. I’m the one who’s sorry; I was an asshole. I showed up here yesterday, pissed off because you were ignoring me, and I let it bruise my ego. Even though I have a really big one, I still don’t like it to take a beating.”
My lips twitch with a small smile but it fades quickly with what he says next.
“It didn’t mean anything, Grace.”
I put my hand up to stop him from going further. “You don’t need to explain anything to me. We’re nothin’ more than friends.”
“Bullshit! What I feel for you is a lot more than a fucking friend and we both know it.”
My eyes snap to his, all the anger from last night returning with a vengeance. “Are you really sayin’ you care for me more than a friend, after you just shoved your dick in someone else, Sawyer Evans?”
“I know I fucked up and I regret it more than you’
ll ever know. I still don’t understand how it happened.”
I scoff, the words the worst cliché I’ve ever heard.
“It’s true, damn it.” He starts pacin’ back and forth, jaw flexing. “One minute I’m at Badass Jack’s, drinking my face off, spewing shit to Jack about delicious pies that can kick your ass and blonde chicks who smell like cupcakes. Then the next thing I know that bitch walks in, comes on to me, and I start comparing her to cupcakes. She is the complete opposite, by the way,” he adds, feeling the need to throw that into his tirade. “I was so pissed off at you that I let it fuck with my judgment and it’s something I’ll regret for the rest of my life.”
The explanation should make me feel better but it doesn’t. “That’s the thing, Sawyer. She’s the complete opposite of me,” I choke out, my tears beginning to slip free. “She’s your type, I’m not and I’m not ever gonna be.”
“She is not my fucking type. I like fucking cupcakes!”
The ridiculous words elicit a small laugh from me but it quickly trails into a sob. I drop my head into my hands, unable to keep my composure any longer.
He comes to stand in front of me, his warm fingers encircling my wrists. “Look at me, Grace,” he demands, pulling my hands away. “It—didn’t—mean—anything. I know you don’t understand that, but it’s the truth. She means nothing to me and never will.”
I peer up into his green eyes that shine with regret and sincerity. I desperately want to believe him, a part of me does, but the pain from last night is too fresh.
“I’m sorry she came in here this morning,” he adds. “She was mad at me and took it out on you.”
I sniffle and wipe my wet cheek. “Don’t worry about it. Kayla put her in her place.”
“Yeah?”
I nod. “She told her if she didn’t leave she was gonna rip off her fake boobs and beat the shit out of her with them.”
A husky laugh barrels from his chest. “That girl is really hard not to like. Even when she’s calling me a douchebag.”
I wince, imagining just how bad she laid into him. She was furious about the whole situation. “I’m sorry. She’s upset and just being a good friend to me.”