Diagnosis Wolf

by Macy Blake

  Caleb was pale and sweaty. His hands had come around Andrew’s back, and Andrew could feel the tremble in them. Not from passion, from pain. He pulled away and stood up, his legs shaky. “We can’t do this.”

  His voice was so low, he barely heard his own words, but Caleb sighed and closed his eyes. “So much for a perfect first kiss.”

  Andrew guided him back down onto the mattress and pulled the covers up to Caleb’s chest. “I never said it wasn’t perfect.”

  He brushed Caleb’s hair away from his forehead and noticed the clammy feel of his skin. “God, I don’t know what I was thinking. You’re in no shape for this. I really have lost it.”

  “Andrew, stop it. You haven’t. I want you. Hell, my wolf wants you. I haven’t been able to shift at all until you came along, and now my wolf is screaming to be set free. I shouldn’t have kissed you without asking, though. I’m sorry for that.”

  “Don’t be. But we can’t do that. Not when I’m here working. It’s not right.”

  Caleb started to argue, but Andrew laid his hand across Caleb’s mouth.

  “Shush. I’m right on this. Now, I’m going to go get you something to drink, and then you’re going to tell me what it’s like to be a shapeshifter. Sound like a plan?”

  Caleb nodded but licked Andrew’s hand. Andrew wrinkled up his nose and wiped the drool on his scrub pants.

  “Gross. And childish.”

  Caleb laughed and settled back against the pillow. “I couldn’t help it. You’re tasty.”

  Andrew snorted and rolled his eyes. “If you’re trying to inspire confidence that you aren’t the big bad wolf, telling me I taste good really isn’t the way to go.”

  “I’ll huff, and I’ll puff, and I’ll blow you.”

  Andrew groaned. “Bad, Caleb. So bad. I’ll be back in a few.”

  “Okay.”

  The long white hallway was empty, and even though Andrew had worn his sneakers and not his crocs, his soles still squeaked on the polished marble floors. He twisted his feet a little to ramp up the annoyance factor and skipped down the stairs.

  He slowed down once he entered the kitchen and found Alfonse standing at the stove. His smile faded at the grim expression on the older man’s face. “Something wrong?”

  Alfonse looked up and started to shake his head. His eyes darted down to Andrew’s mouth, and he frowned. Andrew thought for a second that he had something on his face, and then realized that he did. He covered his mouth with his hand and could feel the heat. Caleb’s stubble had reddened his lips and around his mouth.

  “I’m sorry, sir. I acted unprofessionally. I’ll resign.”

  Alfonse sighed and turned back to the stove. “Don’t be ridiculous. Caleb’s shown his first signs of getting better since you’ve been here. Don’t know that I like something going on between you while he’s in this condition, but if it helps him fight harder to get better, I’m not going to complain.”

  Andrew wanted to say more, but thought he should just bite his tongue and move on. He didn’t see how Caleb was getting any better. In fact, to Andrew, he seemed to be weakening as each day passed. The sports drinks in the refrigerator beckoned, as did the knowledge that Caleb was waiting for him upstairs.

  He found Caleb’s preferred grape flavor restocked on the shelves and pulled a bottle out. Keeping quiet wasn’t his forte, so when he turned around again and found Alfonse watching his movements, Andrew decided to ask the question burning in his mind.

  “How is Caleb getting better?”

  Alfonse looked puzzled for a moment but replied, “Look at what he did this morning. Yes, I understand that he injured you, but that is the first sign we’ve seen of his wolf emerging since this began.”

  “So, the fact that he was able to, what, grow claws? That is a good sign?”

  “Absolutely,” Alfonse answered. “We’ve seen zero signs of him shifting, and for his wolf to be so close to the surface now gives me some relief. If he can shift, I believe he’ll be much closer to beating whatever this illness is.”

  With his limited knowledge, Andrew wasn’t sure how accurate Alfonse’s prediction could be. But it gave him some hope as well. “So, I should encourage him to shift? Is there a way to do that? I mean, can I help in some way? I want him to get better too.”

  “I don’t know that there is a way you can help. I’m his alpha. He should be responding to my command to shift. The sway of the moon should also make his shift easier. Neither of those things is working.”

  “Hmm. Well, I guess if he starts showing those signs again, I should just let you know and see what happens?”

  “Yes. My instincts this morning were torn. I wanted to encourage him to shift, to force him to. However, I could tell how unstable he was at that point and didn’t know how bad it would be. I fear that if he turns feral in his shifted form, we might not be able to get him back.”

  “Feral?”

  Alfonse scowled. “You need to understand something, Andrew. Although we do retain some of our humanity when in our animal form, we are, in essence, mostly animal. There is more reasoning ability, but the instincts are pure wolf. Protect, defend, fight, eat, fuck. Whatever our animal requires is what our sole focus turns to. Now, we are not completely ruled by these instincts, but they do play havoc with our ability to reason when our animal side is injured or fears danger.”

  Andrew tried to remember anything he knew about animals and injury, but his knowledge was sadly lacking. He’d never had pets growing up, other than a hamster Danny had talked his mother into getting at the fair one year. The poor thing hadn’t lasted a week in their house.

  “Okay, so if Caleb shifts now, the wolf side of him will know he’s hurt, and that’s all he, or it, will be focused on?”

  “Exactly. There will be part of Caleb inside, but the wolf will want to heal most of all, and any perceived threat will be dealt with by the animal side of him. You must be careful. If Caleb begins to shift, you need to have me or one of the guards in the room.”

  “Understood.”

  The squeak had left Andrew’s step when he went back upstairs to Caleb. His patient lay sleeping, so Andrew sat the drink aside and stared at him for a long moment. His confidence in Caleb’s ability to control himself had waned a bit, but something in him told him to hang in there.

  Caleb slept through the end of Andrew’s shift, so they didn’t get to continue their conversation. Part of Andrew was relieved—he had no idea what to say.

  Chapter Four

  Andrew stopped by the library on his way to work the next morning and checked out the cheesiest werewolf movies he could find. He’d spent most of the evening sitting on his couch, pondering why it hadn’t shaken him to the core to learn werewolves were real.

  Truth was, it had thrown him for a pretty big loop, but it wasn’t the first time in his life he’d been faced with something monumental, and something told Andrew it wouldn’t be the last.

  It wasn’t like Caleb had just thrown the information out there and expected Andrew to believe it. No, he’d seen the proof both in the changes in Caleb’s body and when Jed had shifted completely.

  The librarian actually recommended a film he’d not heard of when he went to check out, and Andrew happily left with a stack of movies in his bag. Andrew continued his drive to the DiMartinos’ with a smile on his face, unexpectedly excited to see Caleb’s reaction when he showed him what he’d brought. He hadn’t been able to make sense of the trust he felt for Caleb. Hell, with his history, it was more than likely that Caleb would shift and eat him for dinner.

  With a brother like Danny, Andrew had gotten accustomed to lies and betrayal. This latest money-stealing incident was the last in a long line of examples of Andrew’s family letting him down. Growing up, no one had believed him when he said Danny had done something wrong. Danny would blink up at them and say it was Andrew and he’d be punished.

  Andrew knew he was too bighearted for his own good. He should have gotten rid of Danny as fast as h
e could. He’d tried—God knows, he’d tried—by getting into school and moving on campus immediately after he’d graduated from high school.

  It had been two years of peace. He’d found summer jobs and a crummy apartment so he didn’t have to go home during the time off. It had enabled him to take extra classes through the summer months and graduate that much faster.

  Then Danny had graduated and shown up at Andrew’s school. The cycle had started all over again. Danny had lied about him many times, but his brother had never stolen from him. Andrew didn’t count the few dates he’d had that ended up sleeping with his brother as soon as they’d met him. Somehow, for Andrew, the theft of his money was the ultimate betrayal.

  Andrew parked in front of the DiMartinos’ home and stared up at the gleaming white structure. Maybe he was being foolish and trusting, but he needed to believe. Something about Caleb touched a place in Andrew that he’d closed off. The attraction was strong, but Andrew thought there was more to them than just lust. Again, he hoped. But hey, if shapeshifters betrayed you, maybe they wouldn’t leave a mess in their wake.

  He carried the movie boxes in and wondered if Caleb would get the humor. What if he offended Caleb? That was the last thing he wanted to do, but after their conversation the day before, Andrew thought he might get the joke.

  When he put them in Caleb’s lap, Caleb laughed and pulled Andrew close. Andrew let out a sigh of relief and rubbed his hand down Caleb’s arm.

  Caleb wanted to watch one right away. He flipped through the choices and handed over Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man.

  As the spooky credits began to roll, Caleb laughed again. “Lon Chaney, Jr.! The most famous werewolf of all time.”

  Andrew chuckled and settled in his chair next to Caleb’s bed. “Well, I wanted to get The Wolf Man, but it wasn’t available.”

  “I didn’t know you were a werewolf aficionado.”

  “Yes, well, there’s a lot you don’t know about me. Hey, can you do that half-man, half-wolf thing like they do in the movies?”

  Caleb rolled his eyes. “Don’t believe everything you see on screen. No, we can be man or wolf. No middle man for us.”

  “Well, I guess that’s okay.”

  “You guess?” Caleb smirked. “I apologize for our lack of wolf-man talent.”

  “Oh shut it,” Andrew sputtered. “I just meant that it was kind of cool. But hey, at least you aren’t like those wolves in The Howling.”

  “Very true. Or we could be like the ones in that London movie and not have any memory of what we do in shifted form. That’s scarier for me.”

  They watched Chaney’s wolf man try to track down Frankenstein. “Hey, what about silver? Does that hurt you guys like the legends say?”

  “That one is true. Although a bullet doesn’t have to be silver to kill us. We’re not unstoppable. But yeah, sensitive to silver. I think it’s something in our metabolism? I don’t know exactly.”

  Caleb reached over for Andrew’s hand. Andrew placed it in Caleb’s with a smile. “You sure you’re okay with all this?”

  Andrew shrugged. “Okay? I don’t know if I’d call it okay. Part of me is freaked out, part of me is really curious, and then there’s the part of me that wonders just how far in over my head I am.”

  The howls from the movie drew their attention for a moment. Caleb smiled at the snarling beast on the screen. “So fake,” he mumbled.

  “Is it weird that I’d like to see you shift sometime?”

  Caleb smiled over at him. “Not at all. I wish I could. You’d see I’m not crazed like this guy.” He nodded his head toward the television. “Maybe soon.”

  It hurt Andrew to hear the wistfulness in his tone. “We’ll figure this out.”

  “I hope so. Pop says they were able to get the security tapes. The guards are looking over them now. I’m still not sure that guy had anything to do with what’s wrong with me, but I can see how it would look that way. I don’t know.”

  “The only thing we can do is talk to him and find out.”

  “Kind of like how you should talk to your brother?”

  Andrew pulled his hand away from Caleb’s and leaned back in his chair. “There’s nothing to talk about.”

  Caleb sighed. “Sorry. That was shitty of me to say. I’m overly sensitive right now, I suppose.”

  “No, you’re right. Here I am prying into the most private part of your life, and I don’t want to talk about mine in return.”

  Caleb hesitantly reached for Andrew’s hand again. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but I really wish you’d let me help. I hated seeing you that upset. Weird, huh?”

  His words were a strange echo to Andrew’s desire to see Caleb shift.

  “I guess we’re both a little weird.”

  Caleb squeezed Andrew’s hand. “I don’t mind. Do you?”

  Andrew’s stomach fluttered at the intense look in Caleb’s eyes. “No. I don’t.”

  “Good.”

  They turned their attention back to the movie, laughing at the makeup and special effects. Caleb fell asleep part of the way through, and Andrew stopped the film and fussed over his patient for a few minutes. Who was he kidding? Caleb was so much more than a patient to him already.

  In the couple of days they’d known each other, Andrew had connected with Caleb in a way that he’d not done too many times in his past. He stared over at Caleb’s sleeping form, wondering how he’d let his guard down so fast.

  Andrew stopped himself from overanalyzing, knowing he’d end up with another sleepless night if he kept it up. He’d tucked a novel in his bag that morning, leaving the damning letters from creditors at home. Pulling it out now, he settled back in the chair to read until Caleb stirred again.

  A couple of hours into Caleb’s nap, Jed and Monty returned with a screen capture from the club’s surveillance tapes. They woke Caleb up to show him the photograph. Andrew looked over his shoulder, curious to see the man Caleb had picked up at the bar, the one they suspected of poisoning him, and he felt the strongest burst of jealousy. The guy was young and blond. Gorgeous. He’d been wearing nothing but leather pants and with the rest of his styling—perfect hair, dark eyeliner—Andrew didn’t think he compared at all.

  Caleb seemed more embarrassed about it than anything else. Especially since his father had come into the room to see the photo and hear Caleb’s confirmation.

  Once Caleb agreed that they’d found the man he’d gone into the bathroom with that night, Alfonse and the bodyguards had retreated from the room to begin the search.

  Andrew had forced the image from his mind and tried to stay professional. Caleb gave Andrew the strangest look and gestured him over.

  “Do you need something?”

  “I need you to not look at me like I’m scum.”

  Andrew flinched and looked away. “I don’t think you’re scum.”

  “It didn’t mean anything, Andrew. He was just some random hookup in a bar. I don’t even remember his name.”

  “Is that supposed to make me feel better?”

  Caleb grumbled under his breath before forcing himself into a sitting position. Andrew didn’t offer to help this time. He hated that he was letting this impact him so deeply. Who was he to say anything about who Caleb spent time with, especially before they’d even met? It was ridiculous and childish, but Andrew couldn’t seem to force the big green monster back into his cage.

  “I don’t normally do stuff like that. I was lonely. It’s hard to meet people when you have a secret as big as mine. And don’t get me started on my father’s family. My uncle and cousin are waiting for the opportunity to put me out on my ass because of my ‘weakness’.”

  “Weakness?” It was the first time Caleb had mentioned anyone other than his father or the bodyguards. Andrew couldn’t help his curiosity.

  “They think being gay is some kind of crime. I’m supposed to be alpha one day. After my dad gets older. Since I can’t carry on the line, they don’t think I sho
uld qualify. It’s ridiculous and old-fashioned, but there it is. If they knew about this? God, Pop would never hear the end of it.”

  As he spoke, Caleb paled further, and his breath began to come in short gasps. Andrew gave himself a mental slap and rushed to Caleb’s side.

  “Don’t worry about it. We’re going to get you better, and then they can go fuck themselves.”

  Caleb smiled up at him. “I don’t want you to think badly of me.”

  “I don’t. Not really. I’m more jealous than anything, and yes, I know it’s ridiculous.”

  “Nah, it just means you fit right in around here. I don’t want to know about your past relationships. I’d have to kill some asshole who’d hurt you, and then where would we be?”

  Andrew grinned as he reached over and squeezed Caleb’s arm. “You need to rest. We’re getting closer to an answer. Your dad and the guys will find this jerk from the club and find out what he did to you.”

  “I hope so.”

  Andrew walked up the steps to his apartment with zero spring in his step. After several more days of illness, Caleb’s condition wasn’t improving. Well, Alfonse thought it was. Caleb had moments of his wolf trying to surface over the past few days, normally in Andrew’s presence. There hadn’t been any other injuries to Andrew, which he counted as a win.

  In the loss column were the numbers. The numbers didn’t lie, even though Alfonse was convinced the emergence of Caleb’s wolf would make everything better. Caleb grew weaker with each passing day. His blood pressure and pulse rate were sporadic, at best, but the lows were lower and the highs were higher. Andrew didn’t know much about shifters, but he sensed a desperation in Caleb’s other side that didn’t sit well with him. It was as if the wolf knew it was dying. It didn’t give Andrew very much confidence, especially considering they still hadn’t found the missing twink.

  He unlocked the door to his apartment and dropped his bag onto the floor. His spine clenched, and the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end. Something told him to leave, this sudden urge that burst through him and told him he was in danger. His gaze darted around the room. He wasn’t alone.