Shattered Vows

by Kaylea Cross

  Her words turned him inside out. She’d been under so much strain lately, and knowing she was relaxed, that she trusted him to watch out for and protect her satisfied him on the deepest level. “I’m glad. And you are safe,” he vowed, tucking her tighter into him, his chin on the top of her head. “And I’m sorry for being kinda distant lately. It was too hard for me to pretend we could just go back to the way things were before.”

  “I understand, but thank you. And you’re forgiven—as long as you don’t go cold on me again the next time we fight about something. You can’t do that to me again.”

  He winced, knowing she was right. “Fair enough.” There were so many other things on his mind. He’d been careful not to push her about the future, but he had to level with her. “There’s something else you should know.”

  “Okay, do I need to brace myself?”

  He huffed out a laugh. “No. I’m not trying to pressure you for more than you’re ready for, but I’ve got an interview tomorrow with a security firm back east.”

  She twisted around to stare at him, worry in her eyes. “You want to do security work?”

  “I’ve been thinking about it.”

  “And would you have to move?”

  “Yes. To Virginia. And I’d be gone a lot.”

  Her face fell, the worry in her eyes deepening. He had no doubt she was thinking of Carter and how he’d been wounded, the terrible aftermath that had cost them all so much. And that it could be Jase if he went back into harm’s way. “Oh.”

  He stroked his fingers through her curls. “I won’t take it if you don’t want me to.”

  A frown tugged at her brow. “Do you want to?”

  He hesitated. How honest should he be with her? He didn’t want to spook her. “You want the truth?”

  “I always want the truth.”

  “Okay, then no, not really. I accepted the offer of the interview last night, when I thought you and I were never going to happen. I thought maybe me moving back east would be for the best for both of us.”

  She searched his eyes. “And now?”

  “Now it depends on what happens with you and I.”

  “Meaning, if we stay together, then you won’t take the job?”

  “Right, but I don’t want to put pressure on you about that now.” His heart rolled over when she wrapped her arms around him and cuddled into his chest.

  “I don’t want you to go back over there ever again,” she said softly. “I don’t want to live through that kind of worry anymore.”

  Jase closed his eyes and hugged her tight. She did love him a little. “We don’t have to decide anything yet.” The words almost strangled him. He wanted to claim her, lock her down, make her his forever.

  “I guess I’m still a little…afraid,” she admitted.

  It was the first time she’d admitted it. And he wanted to understand. “Of what?”

  “Of getting hurt.”

  Ah, angel… “I wouldn’t hurt you, Moll. Not ever.”

  She was quiet for a second. “I never thought Carter would either. And you served as long as he did. You were exposed to concussive forces a lot too. Part of me worries that you might…” She stopped, as if she was too embarrassed to continue.

  “You’re worried I might wind up like he did one day.”

  She ducked her head lower against his chest. “I’m sorry. I know that probably sounds stupid—”

  “I get it. But I’m not going to wind up like him.” There was no way to prove that to her now, though.

  “Are you mad?”

  “No. I’m glad you told me.”

  She let out a small sigh. “I am too, actually. Although now it sounds really dumb to me.” Then she took his hands and placed them on the mound of her belly, resting hers on top. A thump hit his palm. “Feel that one?” she asked, tilting her head back to look into his eyes.

  “Yeah. It’s so amazing.” He rubbed her belly, awed and overcome by how protective he felt of her and the baby. He already felt like they were both his.

  “Do you miss him?” she asked, taking him by surprise.

  He nodded. “It’s a little easier now, but…yeah. I miss hearing his voice and his laugh. I miss hanging out with him.” He tucked a wayward curl behind her ear. He didn’t mind her talking about Carter. He was actually glad she wanted to, because it meant she felt really comfortable with him. “You?”

  “Sometimes, when I think about how he used to be. He was fun. Remember how fun he was?”

  “Yeah.” Carter had been one hell of a good time before being wounded.

  “But mostly I miss him now whenever I think of him not knowing about the baby. I wish I could tell him. I still wonder whether he drove over that cliff on purpose. If he did, part of me wonders if he would have made a different choice if he’d known.”

  Jase was quiet a moment. “Remember when I told you I promised him I’d look after you?”

  “Yes.”

  “He asked me to.”

  She twisted around to face him more. “He did?”

  “The night we deployed for the first time after you guys got married. He pulled me aside just before we left base and made me promise to look after you if something ever happened to him.” Back then neither of them had imagined Carter would ever kill himself.

  “And you have.” She lowered her gaze. “I’m not sure this was exactly what he had in mind, but you know what? I think he would have been okay with it. Knowing we got together after he was gone. He trusted you more than anyone.”

  Jase nodded. “I know.” That’s why all the damage between them hurt so damn much. “And as far as him being okay with this?” He eyed her. “Not a fucking chance. He’d have torn my head off and reached down my throat to rip my heart out while it was still beating for ever getting near you like this.”

  She laughed. “Okay, you’re right.” He put her hand to her belly. “Oh, God, that feels good to laugh.” She sighed, still smiling. “He would have found that description funny as hell.”

  He loved her. Loved her so much it hurt, and there was nothing he wouldn’t do to show her that. “Right?”

  “I trust you too, by the way.” Her lips curved up in a grin as she stretched up to press her lips to his.

  “Thank you.” He deepened the kiss, cupping the back of her head to take possession of her mouth. Seducing her with every bit of skill he had.

  When he released her a minute later her pupils were dilated and she was breathing faster. “I think you should take me home now. I’m getting hungry again, and it’s bad to make an expectant mother go hungry.”

  Her tone made it clear she didn’t mean food, and she didn’t have to ask him twice.

  Even though he was already thinking about them naked and tangled together in his bed, he still had the wherewithal to watch for anyone following them on the way back to the house. A miracle, considering most of his blood had rushed from his brain to between his legs. The gentle stroke of Molly’s fingers over his as he drove was distracting as hell, making him imagine them gliding over more enjoyable places.

  By the time he made it home he was aching, desperate for the relief only she could give him. She wrapped her arms around him from behind as he let them into his suite, and his brain almost shorted out when she slid her palms down his chest over his stomach, pausing before she dragged them teasingly over the strangled length of his erection shoved against his fly.

  Somehow, he got the security system set to home mode, locked the door then grabbed her around the hips, hoisting her off the floor and carried her to his bed, their mouths fused together, her hands in his hair.

  He laid her across the sheets and reached for the buttons on the flannel shirt she wore, but she sat up and impatiently grabbed the hem of his shirt instead, tugging it upward. He helped her, tossing it over his head to land on the floor, his heart trying to hammer its way out of his chest at the look of feminine hunger and approval on her face as she stared at him.

  She sat up on her kne
es, pushing at his shoulders until he rolled and lay down on his back. Immediately she straddled his hips, her center pressed against the strangled ridge of his cock, and began undoing the row of buttons on her flannel shirt.

  Jase barely resisted the urge to rip it off her, his gaze riveted to the line of smooth skin she revealed. A tempting glimpse of cleavage. The rounded swell of her belly.

  She paused as she started to shrug the shirt off, the tiniest flare of shyness flickered across her face. Jase shook his head, not ever wanting her to hide from him. “Let me see you. I need to see you.”

  She pulled the shirt open, slowly exposing the lush perfection of her breasts cradled in the deep purple bra, and the swell of her belly. Jase groaned and reached for her, gently cupping the sides of her breasts as he sat up to nuzzle the tops of them. She smelled of his soap and salty sea air.

  Molly hummed and reached back to undo the bra, pausing for a heart-stopping moment before pulling it free and leaving her soft flesh to slide into his hands.

  God.

  It had been too dark to see her clearly last night. Jase drank in the sight of her now like a man dying of thirst, stroking his thumbs across the creamy brown mounds, her tight nipples making his mouth water.

  He teased her with his tongue, tracing it around the rigid peaks, enjoying every gasp and shift of her body until she fisted his hair in her hands and pulled him closer. When he closed his lips around one center, her soft moan sent a shiver ripping up his spine.

  “That feels so good,” she breathed, arching her back, pushing harder against his tongue. He sucked at her tenderly, rubbing his tongue over first one nipple, then the other.

  She made a rough sound and pushed away, leaning down to give him a deep, searing kiss before nipping and licking her way across his chest and down to his abs. His muscles contracted, his breathing turning shallow when her delicate fingers undid his jeans and began to drag them over his hips. He helped her, lifting, biting back a groan when his swollen cock sprang free.

  Molly hummed in approval and bent to suck at the skin just below his navel, her soft, cool hands curling around him. He hissed in a breath and gritted his teeth as pleasure surged throughout his body.

  His hands went to her hair, tugging the ponytail free so he could slide his fingers into those tight, clinging curls. He stroked them, urging her on, dying for the moment when that sexy mouth he’d been fantasizing about for years finally wrapped around him.

  She drew the moment out, making him wait, pausing to look up at him with those gold-green eyes for a heart-stopping moment before her tongue darted out to lap at the flushed tip. Jase fisted his hands in her hair, the breath exploding out of him on a strangled groan.

  Her eyes gleamed with a mischievous, playful light, a knowing smile lifting one side of her mouth. She brushed her lips over him, watching his eyes the whole time, then slowly, so slowly it killed him, she parted and closed her mouth around the flared, swollen head.

  Jesus.

  His eyes slammed shut, ecstasy flooding him at the wet heat surrounding him. She sucked, flicking her tongue over the sensitive underside, her hand stroking the shaft.

  He wanted to come down her throat so bad, but he didn’t want to waste this chance—he wanted to watch her face as she slid down on him, watch her eyes go hazy as she took every inch of him inside her.

  He wanted to claim her. Imprint the feel of him into her mind and make her crave the pleasure he could give her.

  Sucking in a deep breath, he pulled her head up. He was panting, his hands a little clumsy as he reached for the waistband of her stretchy jeans. She shifted aside to shimmy out of them and the purple boy shorts she wore, and his gaze shot straight to the strip of dark hair between her thighs.

  “Come here,” he ground out, his voice harsh and guttural, his control almost gone.

  He grasped her hips and hauled her up his body, positioning her thighs on either side of his shoulders. She moved willingly, and he loved that she wasn’t shy with him now, or about communicating what felt good for her.

  Stroking his hands over her sleek curves, he lifted his head and pressed fervent kisses across the firm mound of her belly, the top and inside of her thigh. The scent of her arousal made him insane, the sight of her glistening folds and seeing the evidence of her wanting him almost too much.

  With a soft groan he grasped her hips and tugged her upward until he could kiss the tender flesh between her thighs.

  Molly’s gasp immediately turned into a broken moan, one hand sliding into his hair while she reached for the top of the headboard with the other.

  “I love that sound,” he whispered against her. “Do it again.”

  Jase tongued her gently, licking and caressing, using her movements and noises to guide him, drawing that same, perfect sound from her. Her thighs trembled slightly, her eyes closed as she arched, reaching back to grasp his length in her fist. His whole body contracted as he thrust up into her grip, pushing his tongue into her at the same time.

  “Oh, Jase,” she moaned, her voice unsteady.

  “Sink down on me,” he commanded. “Take all of me inside you.” He helped her shift down his body, mesmerized by the sight of her, her breasts swaying with her movements.

  Straddling his hips, she raised him up in her hand, looked directly into his eyes and began to sink down on him.

  Jase gripped her hips, fighting the urge to take over and thrust upward as she surrounded him, inch by torturous inch. Her lips parted, her eyelids fluttering closed.

  Tight, wet heat engulfed him. A low groan tore from his chest as pleasure swelled.

  “You’re so thick,” she whispered, her words dissolving into a plaintive moan that made him shudder.

  She was so fucking gorgeous.

  Pushing back the need to come, he reached up to squeeze and roll her sensitive nipples, the feel of being buried inside her so much better than he’d ever imagined. Molly eased all the way down then lifted slowly, rocking her hips. He guided her with one hand on her hip, the other delving between her flushed folds to gently rub at the swollen bud of her clit.

  “Ohhh, that’s… Mmhmm.” She bit her lip and flexed around him, her muscles clenching his cock as she splayed her thighs wider apart. Seeking just the right spot and angle.

  God. She was so beautiful, so sensual as she sought her pleasure. “Moll. Ride me,” he rasped out.

  She grabbed his hand, pressed it more firmly between her legs, rubbing against his fingers as she rode him. He watched her climb to the peak, watched her face contort in ecstasy and felt her thighs tremble as he pushed her over the edge, her cries of release ringing through the room.

  Jase sat up and rolled them, still joined, coming up on his knees and taking care not to put pressure on her belly. Molly melted back into the sheets with a sigh and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, a sated, dreamy look in her eyes.

  “Moll,” he said in a ragged whisper.

  She smiled up at him. A secret, intimate smile that twisted him up inside as she wound her legs around his hips and sank her hand into his hair, drawing him down into her hold.

  Jase clenched his hand in her curls and covered her smiling mouth with his, moving slow and deep, each slick, sweet glide magnifying the building sensation. He groaned into her mouth, their tongues twining as he pumped in and out, savoring the feel of her slick walls hugging him.

  He teetered on the edge of release for an endless moment, not wanting it to end. Molly’s hands caressed him, her tongue teasing his, sucking at him. He drove deep, his guttural shout of ecstasy lost in her mouth as he started coming. Every muscle in his body locked tight, pleasure punching through him in endless pulses.

  Struggling to catch his breath, he was finally able to force his eyes open. Molly gave him a soft, tender smile, curling her arms around his neck with a satisfied murmur as she lifted her head to kiss him again.

  Groaning, Jase rolled them onto their sides and tucked her into his body, dreading the moment when he had
to pull out of her.

  I love you.

  Utterly and completely. There would never be anyone for him but her. He wanted everything with her. A future, a home, a family.

  Wrapping his arms around her, he held her tight and closed his eyes, trying to stay in the moment and not leap ahead. It was damn near impossible to hold back the words crowding his throat but he had to be patient a little while longer and wait for her to catch up to him.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Her first shift back at the hospital the following evening was not for the faint of heart.

  Noah had dropped her off more than an hour early so she could get settled and organized. The ER was uncharacteristically busy for a Monday night, with two fractures, a serious stroke and a heart attack patient all arriving within an hour of each other.

  “Ms. Boyd?”

  Molly looked up from her paperwork at a young nurse approaching the counter of the nurse’s station. “Hey. What’s up?”

  “Mr. Brown is up.”

  She groaned. “Again? I just settled him twenty minutes ago.” She’d been sure that dosage would have knocked him out for at least a couple of hours.

  “Yep, again. We’re trying to get him back into bed but it’s so busy and he seems to respond better to you—”

  “I’ll handle it.”

  The nurse gave her a grateful look. “Thank you.”

  Molly chuckled. “Don’t mention it.” She set aside her charts and exited the nurse’s station. Partway to the patient area, she spotted Mr. Brown, a dark-skinned man in his late seventies, standing there in his hospital gown, looking around in consternation. He also showed signs of dementia.

  “Mr. Brown,” she said as she approached. “What are you doing out of bed?”

  His dark eyes focused on her, clouded with cataracts and confusion. “What?”

  “I just put you in bed for the third time a little while ago. Why are you up?”

  A frown wrinkled his forehead as he glanced back at the bed he’d climbed out of. “This isn’t my bed.” He lifted his left forearm and reached for the IV as if he was going to tear it out. Again.