Renegade (Ruthless Tendencies Book 2)

by D. M. Burns

  Realizing that my mouth’s hanging open, I snap it shut and smile. Renegade winks at me. Yeah, he knows my eyes enjoy the landscape. Sightseeing is a pleasure where this man is concerned. Hell, almost everything Renegade, is pleasing and pleasurable. Fumbling with the hairbrush, I start the task of combing out my long-wet locks.

  “Waking up beside you is one of the perks of staying over. Well, that among other things.” He reaches down and adjusts his impressive cock that looks like it’s trying to bungee jump out of his briefs. Jesus. “Come here brown sugar.”

  “I wanted to let you sleep, babe.” I put the brush down and turn to him.

  The look on his face says I better move my ass, but my feet are cemented. For whatever reason, I’m not even sure. The playful chick in me wants to see where this goes. Ren snakes his arm out grabbing me up and lifting me with ease over his shoulder. I let out a heartfelt giggle.

  It feels like we’ve time-warped back to that night at Swanks sans the violent aggression. He moves us out of the bathroom and hefts me onto the bed then quickly uses his body to secure me in place. Those massive hands cradle my head while those silver orbs probe every point of my face.

  “Baby…” He whispers across my lips and damn it I melt. “I know what happened brown sugar.” I close my eyes and my chest caves. This is going to lead to a bad place. “Please talk to me.” He runs his nose across my cheek.

  I’ll give him only what he needs. Anything more will result in life-altering blowback. I won’t allow Renegade to become another Rage situation. Losing years of his life for something that we both cannot change is not an option, incomprehensible. A world without his smile and laugh is no place I want to be. Make no mistake, this man would turn Jake into nothing more than a bad memory in every sense of the word. I’ve lost enough, not him too. I’d never recover.

  “I had a miscarriage five years ago Renegade.” He gulps hard and closes his eyes. “I’m okay.” I’m so not okay. A part of me died along with my baby. Letting you go was the nail in the coffin.

  Brushing my hands through the sides of his hair, I watch it skim through the grooves between my fingers. Taking in the texture and color, cataloging it to memory. He’ll be leaving soon, hurt and hating me once again. His eyes are the color of mercury. Comparable to molten metal being prepared for pouring to take set in bullet form. High cheekbones and strong angular jaw with a straight nose as the centerpiece, perfection. He’s…

  My Sweetest SAFE Kept Secret.

  My Favorite Miscalculation.

  My Greatest Grief.

  My Reasoning.

  My Only One.

  “Was it mine?” He whispers softly. I wished baby.

  I shake my head no as heated tears push at the back of my eyes and I swallow through that round. His thumbs lightly stroke my cheeks giving off a false sense of calm that doesn’t exist in him. But I see it, the manifestation behind his fake facade. The ticking in his jaw even though it’s clenched tight and those eyes flash silver death warnings out like bright sparkling bullets. I’ll save you every day. Mine over Matter. My Renegade.

  “Was Sellers the dad?” I nod yes while staring at his gorgeous lips.

  Closing my eyes, I inhale through my nose then focus on Ren, compose yourself. This is where I’ll surely lose him forever. Infection is starting to spread out into the scabbed over wounds. This is like undergoing surgery of the worse kind without the much-needed anesthesia to kill the pain.

  “Did he rape you, Asia?” His words are barely whispered. My fingers lightly polish across his lips feather-like, and he kisses them. They're so full and soft to the touch, beautiful. “It’s okay, baby. You can trust me. Just tell me the truth.” I can’t. I won’t. I love you.

  Those tears finally fall from the corners of my eyes and I shake my head no. His brows crease with confused scrutiny. His fingers on my cheeks stop moving. His heart rate increases. All at once. It’s funny how I can feel Ryice’s every response, but I feel nothing of myself. That lie slaughtered it all, my everything. I’m numb and effectively empty on the inside.

  What’s worse than a prison sentence for someone with a life full of dreams wanting to live them all out as a free person? In my eyes, it’s someone free with no desire to live out their dreams without their matching person. A free prisoner living a solo sentence. Either way, I go, truth or lie, I’ll end up without him. At least this way Renegade has a life outside of those bars.

  “Baby… Why are you still lying to me? You’re killing me here god damnit.” He murmurs out across my lips, closes his eyes, and shakes his head in disbelief. His forehead rests on mine. My tears are still rolling into the sides of my hair like a constant drip creating a path all their own, no end. “I don’t believe you. Did he force you to have sex with him? Please… Fuck Asia, tell me the truth. No more hate and no more lies baby please.”

  “No. I had been drinking Ren….” I whisper. It’s not a complete lie. Drugged and unconscious, I remember nothing.

  He pulls back but I refuse to break eye contact. It’s the little signs that’ll give me away. I see acceptance slipping into his eyes mixed with anger. Ren backs off the bed, grabs his pants and covers one leg at a time forgoing the zipper and button altogether.

  “You were drunk and fucked around on me then ended up pregnant? Is that what you’re saying?” Those are declarations, not questions. He’s not looking for answers. He has them already. “WOW… Just fucking WOW… Gotta tell you, babe, that was an unexpected response. It’s becoming a repeat cycle and chain of events where you’re concerned.” He scrubs his hand over his face.

  I just stare at him, unmoving. There’s no sense in answering any further questions. I gave him what he needed. He’s safe.

  “This entire time I thought you were a victim. Which is comical when you think about it really.” Ren jerks his shirt off my dresser tugging it over his head forcefully then pulls his arms through. “Because you’re capable of breaking the strongest motherfuckers I know.”

  Stepping into his shoes, he grabs the hair tie and pulls his hair back while sporting that fake fuckery smile on his lips. It hints of the torture that’s sure to come down the road for me. Or knowing Ren he won’t even bother anymore. When he’s done, he’s done. I won’t exist in his world where he’s concerned. No response is the loudest response you can get. It screams death, non-existence.

  “I should know, hell I’m one of them. I’m done here. I’m done with all of this. I’m done with you. But most of all Asia, I’m done with anything that was us. Stay the fuck away from me lady.” With that, he walks out of my bedroom, out of the front door, and out of my life.

  Hanging on by a shaky tree limb hovering over a steep cliff. I finally let go. The fall is razor-sharp with every edge cutting deeply, one by one repeatedly. This bottomless pit is a very dark place. I stopped wondering around in this desolate space. I simply embrace defeat and took the leap. Accepting the destination of depression and death that has found me. WITHOUT HIM. MY RENEGADE.

  chapter 28 – REBEL

  I hate to interrupt but let me take center stage for a moment. This won’t take too long, promise. While this bitch boy in the background whines like the pussy he is, I have a few things to address. I’ll try to focus and touchdown on the high points but ignoring his squeals is only going to prove difficult and piss me off, I can tell. Just bear with me through it.

  “Damn, dude. Renegade worked that pretty boy ass over in a bad way. No need to respond. That’s a statement.” I make a painful face at Jake as I walk past his chair. “Unless I ask you a direct question you shut the fuck up,” I growl in a low voice. “That request is normally never heard twice fuckface.”

  “What the hell did I do to you Rebel? You’re the good one, man.” I smirk demonically. Did this guy not just hear what I said?

  “Yeah. You never saw me coming huh, Jake?” I chuckle. “I get that shit a lot. You’ll be thinking differently by the time this is all over with, I guarantee it.” I wink at him whil
e picking up the nearby empty chair, placing it in front of him then make myself comfortable. “Now, shut the fuck like I said.”

  His sniffling whiney ass is exactly why I don’t deal with the outside world much. People are pieces of shit with less than honorable tendencies. I know that’s the pot calling the kettle black here, but I’d say this is long overdue justice for him, for Asia. Besides that, fuck Jake. He won’t be missed.

  I may be wicked, but I don’t prey on the weakness of women. Normally, I like a challenge, but I’ve made an exception with Jake. Hell let’s be honest, Reese’s Pieces can inflict more pain on me by voicing a harsh word then this snot-nosed trembling twat in front of me would unrestrained and armed with heavy explosives.

  Most overlook or ignore good old red-eyed Rebel. Which totally blows my THC budded-out membrane. Considering some of the shit I’ve smoked over the years that speaks volumes. Your boy right here is six-foot-four, two hundred and eighty-five-pounds of stout muscled up menacing meat. My hazel red-rimmed eyes glow like that of a demonic entity projecting a vibe that wards off even the worst poltergeist spirits. In other words, you’d think I’d be the last one to get overlooked or fly under your radar. But it’s true, I do. Lucky me…

  People chuckle at the half-baked stoner boy that loves his geeky toys and digital devices. Know this, my half blitzed comatose ways are the only reason why I tolerate the dumb motherfuckers within reaching distance. If you truly knew the extent of my creative fatal fuckery you’d have me sealed up in a white box tighter than Hannibal Lector was after he was caught slurping up brain batter. But just like good old Hannibal, touching you is not necessary for me; my thoughts will fuck with you, hard and deliberate-porn style.

  “What are you going to do?” He whines.

  “One more time, real slow just for you, asshole.” I lean up and stable my elbows on my knees and steeple my hands together while taking in this bruised and busted up waste of space. “SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. I’m in thought Sellers. I won’t repeat myself again.” He snaps his mouth shut and more tears slide down his face. This guy’s a disgrace to all the swinging dicks of the world. He lost the male chromosome long ago. That is if he ever even had it to begin with.

  Where was I at? Oh, yeah… It’s my red-eyed laid-back allure that’ll have you inching my way, confusing me for a loveable life-size teddy bear. That categorized cologne charm smells harmless. It draws you in. The ladies compare me to Ferdinand the Bull which is hysterical. Yo, bitches… That motherfucker is fictional, much like what you believe of me. I assure you that there’s nothing soft about me, facts.

  Neither confirm nor deny. I simply chuckle and nod with my pearly whites shining bright. Works out in my favor for pussy pulling though. Not that I need to bait bitches in. Unlike this fuck in front of me, they line up for the D from your boy. Don’t judge. I like to fuck and do it well, so what.

  A cloudy mind and incoherent man like me are best-case scenario. You’d think, right? Contrary to popular belief, I see everything-miss nothing-ignore all. Leaving the fucknuts of the universe to fight it out another day. That’s the key. Hoping they’ll kill each other off. Weeding out the crazies amongst the crazies, tic for tac. That’s time and tax dollars saving shit right there.

  Back in school though, I knew Sellers was hiding a fucked for life flaw. Digging into that was something I overlooked, my bad. Plus, I thought Rage handled it. I was very wrong. Time to rectify my error in judgment.

  They all say that I’m a mini Rage. And to that I say, get the fuck outta here with that shit. That’s a joke. I’m nowhere close to the good that he is and never will be. Those charges he picked up years ago was just that, a carried charge for sins that man was not responsible for. Rage fights. My brothers and I, we facilitate. We failed to do our job properly. We failed Rage. We failed Reese. If anything, he took that shit on his shoulders to save me and my brothers from doing time, period.

  After I got Rage released there were a few angry individuals. My pushy presence left a shitty aftertaste in the mouth of the legal system. Yeah, that was me that got him released. Rage believes it was Rampage and I’m okay with that, but no. I might’ve funneled some sensitive information around which led to his same-day walking papers, whatever. When I got to where I could help my cousin, I did. He’s my blood. That’s what you do for family, period.

  “You couldn’t get to Reese, so you went after Asia, huh? But you wanted them both.” I tsk him. Jake shakes his head violently while squeezing his eyes tightly shut. “I bet you raped Ansley too. That’s what was wrong with that chick. It fucked her up real good too. It’s all becoming very clear now Sellers. Can’t believe I missed it.”

  Scrubbing my hand across my face, I refocus and continue my assessment of this serial rapist. Because that’s exactly what he is, period. Remember what I said? Just like Lector, I can spot the sadistic fucks too. It’s a twisted gift.

  Let’s put it like this, the government knows full well what I’m capable of. I’m internationally known but not seen. Born to the red, white and blue. I’m a loyal little shit and I stay true. They come to me for problem-solving, not the other way around. Normally their requests are for decoding dirty little secrets and disabling military defenses but that’s not all. That’s also, not important right now.

  To wrap this up, I can profile and technologically fuck your world up beyond repair. My skills are unmatched, and my cyber signature is never the same. I’m your serial profiling cyber Ghost. BOO motherfuckers.

  At some point, you must deal with the monster you create though. The authorities deal with me by turning a blind eye. If push comes to shove with this replaceable political, pussy stealing prick in front of me, they’ll ignore my deliverance of evil deeds. My type of crazy craves to play too, ya know.

  “This shit doesn’t stem from an inbred uncle, no.” I slowly shake my head. “This is in your genetic makeup. A fucking DNA disaster if I ever saw one. As soon as your dear old dad shot his wad knocking up mommy dearest, he literally broke the mode with your embryo. It wasn’t really your fault, but your actions once you learned right from wrong were. That’s on you motherfucker.” Jake's eyes widen at my correct evaluation and assessment of his mental health. I shrug as I clean the dirt and weed particles out from under my nails.

  “Rebel… Listen, man… You’ve got it all wrong.” I cut him off by kicking the chair he’s tied to so hard that it sends him tumbling across the room before it comes to a stop colliding into the wall on its side facing me. That’s one sturdy fucking chair.

  “That wasn’t a question fucker. Those are facts. Don’t insult my intelligence.” I tilt my head to the side analyzing his eyes and face. This man has no soul. Zero remorse for the sin when caught up in the act but afterward, maybe. I’ll figure it out with Q & A’s. It still doesn’t explain why he’d develop feelings for Asia. I’ll get to that in a minute though, due process.

  Now if you ask me, Renegade’s more like Rage except with a humane approach. He’s the responsible glue that sandwiches us all in. The guy operates a damn security and protection firm while maintaining eyes over Club Chaos for God sakes. What does that say about him? Guardian. Protector. Our families shield.

  As much as he tries to act unaffected, I see through that shit. Not that he was hiding it well the other night anyway. With his trendy blood-splattered fashion statement, and modernized shard glass kitchen floor. That shit was on full display.

  Renegade runs deep, loves hard and cares more than any of us put together. Our oldest brother by two minutes stepped up and took charge when Rage went away. He didn’t have to, but he did. He could’ve fucked off just like Rampage; just like me. He’s the balanced and controlled one. A damn good man but all good men have a breaking point. Asia is his. She’s the flaw in his defensive armor.

  Nevertheless, I have rich family principles that are my priorities with zero remorse in any of my actions, believe that. After seeing my brother lose his sane side the other night it was go time. I decided to look
after him for once. Plus, I like getting into the mind of these demented fuckers. It’s a learning method and cultivates my experience. And being malicious is a release that I indulge in from time to time with the crazies. Like government hacks, I excel at it.

  You fuck with my family or friends and I’ll put playtime on the back burner. Coming for you will be my new high of choice. People need to worry if they see me stubbing my blunt out. Which I did. For this manic motherfucker in front of me.

  Jake fucked with the wrong one the day he touched Asia, she’s family. All that led me right here. Sitting in his pretentious house. Staring at this slimy suited up piece of shit. Peeling back the crazy onion one layer at a time, debating. Time to give back to my community. He shakes his head and lets out a labored breath.

  “Curiosity is killing me, Jake. Why give a shit, hmmm? Normally, your kind never catches criminal feels for their victim. Why Asia? What made her special?” I rest my chin in my hand a study his every move.

  “She never broke. Nothing she went through ever snapped her spirit.” He smiles wickedly. Yeah, there’s the criminally insane fucker seeping out of him. “Everything I had done… I was going to make it right though.”

  “I gotta call bullshit, you sick fuck.” I growl. He’s a lying bastard.

  Pulling the joint out from behind my ear, I fire it up taking a long toke off my supreme bud. This is much needed THC-TLC. Dealing with this mental mind fuck sprawled out on the floor calls for it. He looks like an evil male version of Emily Rose adorned in a business suit tied to a fucking chair sideways. His face is all busted up from Renegade’s artwork and that neck of his is crooked up trying to talk to me. Fucking priceless portrait.

  Pulling my phone from my pocket, I switch it over to picture mode and point it at Jake. “Smile fucker.” That’s a good one. “What about that? You may be a psychologically challenged motherfucker but your photogenic.” I tuck my phone back into my coat pocket and take another hit off my joint then flick my ashes on his floor.