Death March to the Parallel World Rhapsody, Vol. 8

by Hiro Ainana

  “Hmph. Such foolishness.”

  Shiya grunted at Poa and sank into the bath.

  It sounded to me like a fight was about to break out, but clearly this was just their usual banter, and they began to enjoy the bath without any further sparring.

  “Y-you shouldn’t go that way, Miss Gia. That’s the men’s bath!”

  “Move.”

  Unlike the now peaceful men’s bath, it sounded like there was some commotion taking place on the ladies’ side.

  In addition to Lulu’s and Gia’s voices, I heard Arisa and the beastfolk girls clamoring, too.

  A crash and a loud sploosh echoed through the bathhouse, and a furious-looking Gia appeared.

  She was totally naked, just like Poa was.

  If I were a lolicon, I was sure I’d be thrilled about all this.

  “Heard.”

  “You heard what?”

  Gia stood imposingly in front of us. I politely offered her a towel, but she made no move to accept it.

  “P-please cover yourself up!”

  Before the steam could do its job, Lulu hurried over to cover Gia’s chest with a towel.

  Lulu was wearing a robe, but it was soaked from the bath, leaving it very clingy.

  The sight of her figure was almost enough to lead me down the path of temptation, but I managed to maintain my senses.

  “Hoo boy, is this paradise or what?!”

  “Arisa.”

  Mia arrived and covered Gia’s lower half with another towel, then she scolded Arisa for abandoning their iron-wall duties.

  Through the mist, I could see the beastfolk girls and Nana approaching, too.

  I guess everyone was gathering on this side now.

  “Labyrinth. True?” Gia demanded shortly.

  “If you’re asking whether we’re planning to go to Labyrinth City, then yes, that’s right.”

  Gia and the other elves all frowned at my response.

  Thinking back, I remembered a line in Trazayuya’s notes from the Cradle: Many of our youth have died in labyrinths.

  Maybe the elves thought of labyrinths as death traps, then.

  “I’m sorry. Did hearing that upset you?”

  “No. Dangerous.” Gia shook her head.

  “Calm down.”

  “I know that slow and steady wins the race, but you must be sure that your words are understood if you wish to get anywhere.”

  Miss Poa and Shiya the samurai elf cut in front of Gia.

  “Mr. Satou, are you really planning to go to Labyrinth City Celivera?” the long-spoken elf Hiya asked.

  “Yes, we are.” I nodded.

  “Reckless.”

  The short-spoken elf Guya, who had been silent until now, added a single word to the chorus of dissent.

  “Do you even know what those labyrinths are like? It’s not the kind of place you go just for a lark!”

  It seemed that the elves weren’t angry with us, just concerned for our safety.

  “W-wait a second. We’re the ones who asked master to take us to Labyrinth City.” Arisa interrupted Hiya, taking the responsibility on herself.

  “Indeed. Arisa is not the only one who made the request…”

  Liza and the other kids all chorused in agreement.

  Glancing at Hiya, I saw that his eyes had turned serious, so I calmed my kids down for the moment.

  “Perhaps I should explain…”

  After instructing everyone to enter the water so they wouldn’t catch cold, Hiya explained his experiences.

  A few hundred years ago, he and the other elves present had trained in the labyrinth in Celivera.

  I guess he didn’t become level 40 just by fighting a bunch of low-EXP monsters.

  “It was a terrible place. There are lights that illuminate your path, but it’s actually a trap,” he said.

  “Light makes shadows, ya know,” Poa added after Arisa looked confused.

  “Goblin Assassins appeared from the shadows, and when we tried to retreat to a safe place, we stumbled onto a Hatch Hole. The battle only got worse from there.”

  “It was truly a place like unto hell.”

  “Weak spirits.”

  I would be fine, since I had the map, radar, and so on, but I could see how this would be a hellish place for any ordinary person.

  Incidentally, the Hatch Hole Hiya mentioned was basically a monster spawn point like in video games, where a hole suddenly opens in the wall and tons of monsters appear.

  “We’ll find theeem.”

  “That’s right, sir! Tama and Pochi will find all the monsters, sir!”

  Hiya smiled sadly at the beastfolk pair, patting their heads.

  “That’s right. Beastfolk have such sharp senses. They were very helpful in places without a lot of spirits, at first.”

  At first…?

  “But even beastfolk can’t go on forever with their nerves constantly on edge. People can’t live without sleep. And if you want to get to the depths of the labyrinth, you’ll need to be in there for days.”

  In retrospect, when I got caught in the labyrinth under Seiryuu City with the beastfolk girls, I hadn’t slept for several days.

  My current body seemed to be able to stay awake for around five days easily enough, aside from a bit of strain on the mind.

  “And monsters aren’t the only enemies there.”

  “Are there bandits as well?” Liza asked.

  “Plunderers,” the short-spoken elf Gia responded.

  Plunderers must be to labyrinths what pirates were to the high seas, I guess.

  “Yes, those too. But I’m actually talking about fellow explorers. They normally won’t attack you, but if you let your guard down after a monster battle, there are those who might try to entrap you. You mustn’t trust anyone in the labyrinth.”

  The younger kids looked like they might cry at that.

  “But those people are the minority, of course,” Hiya added to reassure them, seeing me embracing the frightened-looking Tama and Pochi.

  When we explored a labyrinth, we should probably build our base camp in deep enough that other explorers weren’t likely to come through.

  I had Teleport Magic, too, so it should be relatively easy to avoid interpersonal problems.

  “Thank you for worrying about us, truly. If it’s all right, would you mind telling us more about your experiences in the labyrinth?”

  Hiya looked at me like I was starting to give him a headache.

  “D-didn’t you hear everything I just told you?”

  “Yes, it was very useful information…”

  How strange. Why were they reacting like this when we were just trying to gather information for safety’s sake?

  After a moment of silence, the elves formed a huddle and started discussing something.

  Left with nothing else to do, I absently patted Tama’s and Pochi’s heads.

  Before long, the contact seemed to cheer them up. Tama started purring, and Pochi’s smile returned with a little giggle.

  Finally, Shiya the samurai came over in Hiya’s place.

  I guess the elf meeting had come to a conclusion.

  “You are truly determined to go to the labyrinth, no matter what?”

  “Duuuh.”

  “O-of course, sir.”

  Tama’s answer was immediate, though Pochi’s came with a bit of a delay.

  The other kids all answered “yes” in near-perfect unison.

  For some reason, this even included Mia, who was supposed to stay here in the Bolenan Forest.

  “Yes, since that’s what the children want.”

  Personally, I’d rather go on a pleasant aboveground journey than explore a dark, damp labyrinth crawling with monsters, but if my friends were going to travel with me in this dangerous world, they did need to raise their levels.

  “Then whilst you are here in Bolenan, we shall train you ourselves. None of us wishes to send you on your way only to hear of a tragedy later, like in Traya’s time.”

>   It was an unexpected offer, but we all gratefully agreed.

  I wasn’t that concerned about myself, but it’d be wonderful to have my kids learn the techniques the elves had honed over countless years.

  Fairy Training

  Satou here. When I played games, I could hardly ever bring myself to use max-recovery potions. It must be because of that time I used them all up on the last boss only to get my ass handed to me when the boss turned out to have a second phase.

  “I’m not done yeeet?”

  “Quite a skilled fighter, aren’t you? You lack a bit of attack power, but you make up for it with tremendous spatial awareness.”

  Shishitouya the samurai elf, or Shiya for short, fended off Tama’s short sword and shield easily as he gave her advice.

  We were at an elf training ground near the edge of the Bolenan Forest, bordering monster territory.

  It had already been about five days since the events in the public bathhouse; since then, the elves had been instructing my party and me at this training ground.

  Today we were having one-on-one matches with our trainers, but most days we just did practice combat.

  Our opponents on those days were dummies the elves magically constructed out of grass, mud, and so on.

  On days when we practiced against monsters, the hunting master Hishirotoya and I would go out into the monster territory outside the forest and bring back enemies.

  The only options in that territory were two extremes: The monsters were all either less than level 10 or higher than level 40.

  “Take this, ma’am!”

  “Good charge, but pay more attention to your surroundings. If there had been a trap in the grass between us, you’d already be caught.”

  Pochi, who was holding a one-handed sword with both her small hands, was sparring with the curly-haired Portomea, or Miss Poa.

  “I eat traps for breakfast, ma’am!”

  “Don’t be a fool! Minus one point.”

  Poa emphasized her scolding with a smack from the paper fan in her hand, one of Arisa’s latest works.

  “Aren’t you the real fool for calling me a fool, ma’am?”

  “Oh, be quiet. You must mind your teacher’s words. If I tell you to give me your hamburg steak, you have to do it, even if you’re hungry!”

  At this shocking declaration, Pochi turned pale and teary-eyed.

  Seeing this, Poa hastily corrected herself.

  “Sorry, I didn’t mean that about the steak. If it was a rice ball, maybe.”

  “All right, ma’am. A rice ball would be fine, ma’am.”

  I guess hamburg steaks were extra-special to Pochi.

  “She can use Spellblade at her level…?”

  “Promising.”

  Yusek, a short spear–wielding spriggan, and Gurgapoya (Guya), a short-spoken elf who used a helix spear, were impressed with Liza’s moves.

  We’d just met Mr. Yusek today, but he was as skilled with a spear as Guya and said to be the strongest of the spriggans living in the Bolenan Forest.

  When he introduced himself, he even showed us his trick of making Spellblade fly off the tip of his short spear.

  I asked him to show us again, but he simply told me to “steal it.”

  Easy for him to say when he hasn’t done the trick again since.

  It was pretty neat, so I’d definitely like to learn how eventually.

  “Combine with magic.”

  “You can’t stop a charging monster with a shield alone! You have to use your magic at the same time and not worry so much about preserving all of your magic power. Don’t be stingy with the Body Strengthening!”

  “Advice accepted.”

  The other short-spoken elf of the party, magic swordsman Gimasarua (or Gia), was teaching Nana, along with the shield-using dwarf Keriul. He was pretty strong at level 38.

  As it turned out, Keriul was also the uncle of Zajuul, the lovestruck smith I’d met in the dwarves’ independent city of Bolehart.

  There weren’t any elves who specialized in shields, so Hiya, who had a lot of connections, had brought the dwarf from the leprechaun village where he was studying.

  “Miss Lulu, be careful not to bend your knees.”

  “Y-yes, Miss Nea.”

  “Nnngh, I can’t help it! They’re gonna breeeak!”

  “Arisa, one must be flexible if one wishes to excel at martial arts. Try to be more bendable.”

  Surprisingly, Nea the cook was the one training Lulu and Arisa.

  Despite the elves’ magical excellence, there were very few who could use Space Magic, and all of them were away on business with the high elf Aialize, so none could train Arisa.

  Miss Nea had offered to teach Arisa self-defense instead and ended up roping in Lulu as well.

  Lulu’s Magic Gun and Arisa’s chant-less Space Magic weren’t well suited to close combat with humanoids, so this worked out perfectly.

  Mia was away with her mother at the stone stage, where she was being initiated in the art of Spirit Magic.

  Impressed by the convenience of Spirit Magic, Arisa briefly considered acquiring the skill but abandoned that idea as soon as she saw that it cost even more skill points than Space Magic.

  “Now, Satou, shall we begin our training as well?”

  “Yes, sir.”

  Hishirotoya, the long-spoken elf, was my teacher.

  “… Breeze Soyokaze.”

  “… Breeze Soyokaze.”

  “… Breeze Soyokaze.”

  Yes, he was training me in using chants.

  I’d been using scrolls as a loophole to increase the amount of spells I could use from my magic menu, but I still wanted to learn to use magic properly.

  Scrolls could be made only for spells up to intermediate magic, not to mention that I had to personally request them from Viscount Siemmen’s scroll workshop.

  I did use magic in front of Hishirotoya during the hunting trip the other day, but he assumed that was just a hero’s unique skill of some kind, so he didn’t comment on the fact that I couldn’t use chants.

  “… Breeze Soyokaze!”

  A gentle breeze brushed against my cheek, but it definitely wasn’t I who’d caused it.

  “Easy.”

  It was Goya, who’d officially developed a grudge against me when I beat him at buffalo hunting.

  “Goya, if you’re going to get in the way, just go home.”

  “Mrrr. Demonstrating.”

  Hishirotoya frowned at Goya’s smug expression.

  The scolding did nothing to lessen his smirk, though.

  Clearly, he was pleased to have found something he could beat me at.

  I was privately a little irritated, but I used my “Poker Face” skill to deflect his taunting with the attitude of a mature adult.

  “Don’t let it get you down, Satou.”

  “I’m not particularly upset.”

  I brushed off the consolation of my teacher, Hishirotoya, as lightly as I could.

  Training might make you think of working from dawn till dusk to master something, but the elves’ idea of it was a bit more relaxed, probably because they lived more than a hundred times longer than humans did. Our training lasted only a couple of hours each afternoon.

  The elves’ training began with a lecture explaining the point of the exercises we were about to do, then it moved on to more hands-on training, concluding with a sort of review meeting summarizing the day.

  Today, as it often did, the final meeting took place in the steamy tubs of the public bathhouse.

  “Satou.”

  With a little sploosh, Mia plopped down next to me, along with her mother, Lilinatoa. They’d just returned from Spirit Magic training.

  Perhaps it was because she was an elf, but Lilinatoa definitely didn’t look like a woman who had ever given birth.

  After I greeted the pair, I resumed my conversation with Hishirotoya.

  “Why, it took Goya more than thirty years before he could chant properly.”


  “Th-that’s quite a long time.”

  I was surprised he’d been willing to keep at it for thirty years, honestly.

  That knowledge would probably soften the blow next time he showed up grinning smugly at me.

  “Phew, you finally smiled!”

  Arisa looked up at me with a relieved expression.

  “The bath is one of the only times our master ever lets his feelings show on his face, you see,” she added to Mia, speaking around me.

  “Mm. Got it.”

  Since we’d gotten into the habit of all bathing together after training, I explained things to the elves and got permission for everyone to use bathrobes.

  None of the elves was wearing one, however.

  Hishirotoya gave this explanation:

  “We elves are like one big family, and we don’t lust after the opposite sex as intensely as most other races do.”

  Most likely, this meant that elves had a low reproduction rate, as was often the case in stories.

  If they bred like humans, the world would be full of elves by now.

  “I’m amazed you have children at all, then!”

  “Well, elves do fall in love. If those feelings remain for a hundred years or so, marriage is usually the next step.”

  Hishirotoya’s answer seemed to miss the point of Arisa’s remark ever so slightly.

  “Marriaaage?”

  “We saw a wedding parade in the old capital, sir!”

  Tama and Pochi, who were playing around with their towels in the water, perked up at the mention of a familiar word.

  “What are elf weddings like?”

  “Aaze.”

  “Blessing.”

  The two short-spoken elves answered Arisa’s question.

  Of course, their meaning was unclear, so we asked the more verbose elves to explain.

  “The couple takes an oath of marriage in the World Tree, and Lady Aaze confers a blessing upon them. Then the pair pours their magic into the Holytree Stone they receive and nurtures it along with their love.”

  If I remembered correctly, the Holytree Stone was also known as a Philosopher’s Stone, the object that was the base of the powder Aialize had me use at the stone stage.

  The stone must be used as a sort of wedding ring or registration.

  “Once a couple has been married for between ten and fifty years, they will generally enter the mating season. It is easy to tell when a child has been conceived, as the bearer will experience a craving for the Holytree Stone. It’s believed that if the mother consumes water containing the powder of the Holytree Stone while pregnant, the child will be happy and healthy.”