The Ugly Duckling

by Iris Johansen

  Kabler instantly released her.

  Richard sat up dazedly, gingerly touching his abdomen. “What the hell has happened to you, Nell?”

  “You happened to me. You and Maritz and—” She turned on her heel. “If you want him in one piece, you’d better get me away from him, Kabler.”

  “It’s not what I want, it’s what I have to have. If I had my choice, I’d run a bus over him.” He took her arm and tried to lead her away.

  She shook him off and looked back at Richard. “I want to know only one more thing. Why did you marry me?”

  He smiled maliciously. “Why do you think? That I’d marry a plain little nobody who’d been stupid enough to get herself knocked up? Your father gave me a fat check and a glowing letter of introduction to Martin Brenden.”

  He thought he’d found a way to hurt her. He didn’t realize that his words cut the last fragile tie between them, freeing her.

  “You didn’t have to tell her that,” Nadine said even as she carefully helped him to his feet. “You can be a real bastard sometimes, Richard.”

  Kabler gently guided Nell out of the room. “I’m sorry I had to put you through this,” he said as he held the front door open for her. “I didn’t see any other way to prove Tanek was lying to you on all fronts.”

  “He knew about this?”

  “Nigel Simpson gave him the information.”

  “How can you be sure?”

  “Reardon was in Athens, talking to the doctor we had on Medas who certified Calder was dead. He’s been snooping, trying to find out where we’d stashed Calder.”

  “Nicholas knew he was alive and he didn’t tell me?”

  “I told you, when you get into that circle, they’re all the same.” He looked back at the house as they walked toward the car. “You were pretty impressive back there. Tanek’s work?”

  She barely heard the question. “Why didn’t he tell me?”

  “My guess is that he had plans for you that didn’t include you being distracted by such a minor thing as a live husband.”

  He was talking about Nicholas using her for bait again. For the first time, she wondered if he was right. Nicholas was very clever. Could he have manipulated her and made her think she was the one in control? She didn’t think she could be that stupid, but—

  Later. She was too shocked and angry to think clearly now.

  “Can I trust you to keep quiet about this?” Kabler asked. “I’ve put my job on the line by bringing you here. You won’t be dropping any anonymous notes to Gardeaux about Calder’s whereabouts?”

  “What makes you think Gardeaux knows he’s alive?”

  “Reardon isn’t the only one who’s been asking questions, and Simpson didn’t get his information from us.”

  She felt another flare of sheer rage. “I promise I’ll not communicate with Gardeaux.” She added coldly, “I don’t promise I won’t kill that bastard myself.”

  “I was afraid of that.” He sighed. “That means I’ll have to move Calder to another—”

  “Are you ready to leave now?”

  She whirled to see Nicholas walking toward her down the street.

  “You wanted proof he knew about Calder. Here he is,” Kabler murmured. “You’re too late, Tanek. I don’t think she’s going to go with you.”

  “You did know,” she whispered. She hadn’t realized until that moment how desperately she had wanted to believe he hadn’t lied to her about this too. “You knew everything and you didn’t tell me.”

  “I would have told you eventually.”

  “When? Next year? Five years?”

  “When it was safe.” He turned to Kabler. “You had to bring her here, didn’t you? You knew Calder was still targeted and you brought her to him. She shouldn’t be anywhere near him.”

  “He’s well hidden here in Bakersfield. It’s you she shouldn’t be near. She knows that now. You can’t use—”

  Nell was knocked to the ground with the force of a giant fist!

  Nicholas had been knocked to the ground too, but was now on top of her, protecting her from flying debris.

  Debris from where? she wondered in bewilderment. What had happened?

  Then over Nicholas’s shoulder she saw the house.

  What was left of the house. No windows. No porch. The south wall was blown away and the entire ruin was on fire. Licking, roaring flames.

  “What happened?” she asked blankly.

  “A bomb.” Kabler was on his knees, his face cut and bleeding. His hands clenched into fists as he gazed in helpless fury at the house. “Dammit, they got him.”

  He was talking about Richard. Richard had been in that house. Richard was dead. Nadine was dead.

  She had just been talking to them and now they were dead.

  She was vaguely aware that Nicholas was standing up, pulling her to her feet. “Come on. We’ve got to get out of here.”

  Kabler was getting to his feet slowly, painfully, staring at the ruin. “Damn them. Damn them to hell.”

  Nicholas grasped her arm and was pulling her down the street toward his car.

  “Where do you think you’re going?” Kabler asked, whirling toward them.

  “Away from here. Or do you want them to get her too?”

  “Maybe it wasn’t Gardeaux. You showed up very conveniently. Maybe it was you.”

  “You’d like to think so. Then you wouldn’t be blamed for leading them to Calder.” He met Kabler’s eyes. “But you don’t think it was me. You know you made a mistake when you brought her here. She was probably watched from the time she showed up at Lieber’s house. They followed you here and set the bomb up next to the gas main while you were in there talking to Calder.”

  “They couldn’t have followed us here. I’ve ordered that all DEA flight plans are sealed.”

  “They wanted Calder. Offer anyone enough money and seals can be broken. You know that as well as I do.”

  Kabler opened his lips to protest and then closed them. “Yes, I know that,” he said. He suddenly looked old, beaten.

  “Now, are you going to let me take her out of the battle zone before they kill her too?”

  Kabler didn’t speak for a minute and then nodded jerkily. “Get out of here.” He turned to Nell. “I have to do damage control, but I’ll catch up with you later. If you’re smart, you’ll remember what you saw here tonight and not let him use you.” He glanced back at the burning house. “Or you’ll be as dead as Calder.”

  “I’ve kept her alive for five months.” Nicholas half pulled, half nudged her toward his car.

  People were coming out of the neighboring houses, she noticed numbly. A siren wailed in the distance.

  Nicholas opened the passenger door. “Get in.”

  She hesitated, looking back at Kabler.

  He was no longer staring at the house. He was bending over the open door of his car, talking rapidly into the car phone.

  Damage control, he had said.

  What could be controlled in that inferno? Richard and Nadine were both dead.

  She got into the car and Nicholas slammed the door shut.

  Fifteen

  “Are you okay?” Nicholas asked quietly as he maneuvered the car through the residential street.

  She didn’t answer directly. “Will Kabler get into trouble for this?”

  “Maybe. He made a big mistake. But he wields a lot of power in the agency. They’re not going to jettison him.”

  “It’s not his fault. He couldn’t know we’d be followed.”

  “I don’t want to talk about Kabler. I don’t give a damn about him. How are you?”

  “Fine.” Her hands tightly clutched the leather strap of her shoulder bag. She had to hold on to something, anything. Everything seemed to be sliding away from her. “Where’s Jamie? Did he come with you?”

  “He’s waiting at the airport. That’s where we’re heading.”

  “I’m not getting on any plane with you.”

  “Christ, do you think I’
m going to kidnap you?”

  “I don’t know what you’ll do.”

  “I just want to get you out of this town.”

  “How do I know that? How do I know anything you say is true?”

  He muttered a curse and suddenly pulled over to the curb beneath a streetlight and shut off the engine. “All right. Let’s talk.”

  “I don’t want to talk.” God, she felt as if she were falling apart.

  “Look at me.”

  She stared straight ahead.

  He took her chin and turned her to face him. “It’s all right. I’m not going to force you to do anything you don’t want to do.”

  “You couldn’t.”

  “It’s true I might have trouble. I’ve taught you too well.” His finger traced the line of her cheek. “But I couldn’t teach you how to handle this. You just have to breathe deep and wait until the shock passes.”

  “Why should I be shocked? Because I saw two people blown up? I might have considered setting the fuse myself. Richard started all this.”

  “Very hard. Very tough.”

  “Shut up.” She was starting to shake. “Start the car. I told you I didn’t want to talk.”

  He tried to draw her into his arms.

  She stiffened. “Let me go. Don’t touch me.”

  “When you stop shaking.”

  She backed to the edge of the seat.

  “Okay, I’m a liar and you don’t trust me. Then use me. Take from me. That should make it all right.”

  “Get your hands off me.”

  His hands dropped away from her. “All right. Talk. Sometimes that helps.”

  “I don’t want to talk.”

  “Tell me about Calder.”

  She shook her head.

  “I wouldn’t have thought the bastard’s death would have upset you this much.”

  “I hated him,” she said, stung. “Jill wouldn’t have died if he hadn’t been dealing with Gardeaux. I would have killed him if Kabler hadn’t stopped me. I wanted him dead.”

  “Did you want her dead too?”

  “Nadine? No. I don’t know. I don’t think she meant to hurt.… I don’t know.”

  “But it was taken out of your hands.”

  “Yes.”

  “And that scares you because it makes you feel helpless. It will happen again. You can’t control everything all the time. Sometimes you can only react.”

  “Start the car.”

  “Where are we going?”

  “You’re going to drive me to the airport.”

  “Will you let me take you back to the ranch?”

  “You’ve got to be kidding.”

  “I didn’t think so. What are you going to do?”

  “My plans haven’t changed.”

  “But I’m not involved in them any longer.”

  “I can’t trust you.”

  “But you need me. That hasn’t changed. You’re letting your emotions get in the way of your reasoning.” He glanced at her. “All right, I lied to you. Principally by omission, but that’s a cop-out. I lied. Do you believe Kabler that I’m trying to use you as bait?”

  “I believe you’re capable of anything.”

  “You’re not answering me.”

  “No,” she said curtly.

  “Have I done anything to endanger you?”

  “No.”

  “Then what have I done that’s so heinous?”

  “You robbed me. You shut me out,” she said fiercely. “This is my life. I had a right to know about Richard. I had a right to go to Tania when she was in danger.”

  “Yes, I robbed you of those rights and I’d do it again.”

  “And you expect me to just go on as if nothing had happened?”

  “No, I expect you to realize that I’ll lie and cheat if it means keeping you safe. And I expect you to learn to adjust and defend yourself against it. But I also expect you to use me the way you planned to in the beginning. Why shouldn’t you? Think calmly and logically. Aren’t I right?”

  She wanted to yell and hit out at him. She didn’t feel like being logical. She felt alone and betrayed, and she wanted him to suffer for it.

  “It’s my ballpark. I know the way around the bases. Didn’t Calder’s death teach you anything?”

  She shuddered as she remembered her last glimpse of that blazing inferno. The explosion had come out of nowhere. She had never dreamed—But Nicholas had known at once what had happened. All right, put aside the hurt and anger. She did need him. Everything else might have changed, but that had not.

  “I won’t go back to the ranch.”

  “That’s already a given.”

  “And I won’t wait until the end of the year. I’m going to leave for Paris immediately.”

  “If that’s what you want.”

  She stared at him suspiciously. He was being too accommodating.

  “I’ll make the reservations as soon as we get to the airport. Do you mind if Jamie comes with us? He can be very helpful.”

  “I don’t mind,” she said slowly.

  “Good. Then lean back and leave everything to me.”

  “That’s the last thing I intend to do. I won’t make that mistake again.” She met his eyes. “There are a lot of mistakes I won’t make. Don’t think that anything is going to be the same, Nicholas.”

  “You don’t have to tell me that.” He started the car. “Like you, I’ll learn to adjust.”

  “Where are we going to stay?” Nell asked as she got into the dark blue Volkswagen Jamie had rented at Charles de Gaulle airport.

  “I keep a flat on the outskirts of the city. Nothing pretentious, but it has the advantage of privacy. We’ll stay there tonight.”

  “As private as you can get in Paris.” Jamie climbed into the backseat. “You can’t count on Gardeaux not knowing about the flat.”

  “I don’t count on anything.” Nicholas negotiated the car out of the parking lot. “That’s why I want you to scout around and find something in the country tomorrow. I don’t want to risk one of Gardeaux’s men seeing Nell. They know she’s alive, but they don’t know what she looks like. That could work to our advantage.”

  She looked at him inquiringly.

  “If I decide to send you into the cage with the tigers.” Nicholas added, “Maybe I’ll do what Kabler told you I’d do and stake you out.”

  She shook her head. “No, you won’t.”

  “Why should I bother, when you’re willing to do it yourself?” He shrugged. “But, despite Kabler’s concern, your value as bait has diminished. You should no longer be a prime target.”

  “Why not?”

  “You were targeted first as a punishment to Calder. Maritz went after you a second time to try to squeeze information about Calder’s whereabouts.”

  “But you saw that I didn’t know anything about it, didn’t you?” she said bitterly.

  “They didn’t know that. It was logical that a wife would know where her husband was.”

  “Then you think she’s safe?” Jamie asked.

  “Maybe. She shouldn’t be on Gardeaux’s list anymore.” He shot her a look. “But you may still be on Maritz’s. He tends to get obsessive.”

  He really is the bogeyman.

  “I know.” She shook off the chill the thought brought. “But that may work to our advantage too.”

  “On the other hand, he may regard you as just another job and leave you alone.”

  “I might as well start looking for a place today,” Jamie said. “When we get to the flat, I’ll drop you off and take the car and see what I can come up with.”

  Nicholas unlocked the door of the flat and stepped aside for her to enter.

  “Very nice.” She looked around the living room. Comfortable, elegant, spacious. She should have expected the latter. Nicholas always liked plenty of room. “Which is my room?”

  Nicholas gestured to a door to the left. “There’s a bathrobe in the closet. We’ll buy whatever else you need tomorrow.”


  “Okay.” She moved toward the door he’d indicated.

  “Come to the kitchen when you’re finished freshening up. The landlord keeps the refrigerator stocked with the basics. I’ll make an omelette. You didn’t eat on the plane.”

  “I’m not—” She stopped. She was hungry and there was no use starving herself to avoid Nicholas. “Thank you.”

  “Yes, you have to keep up your strength,” Nicholas murmured. “After all, the game’s afoot.”

  She ignored the hint of irony and carried her bag into the bedroom. Lord knows, she didn’t have much strength at the moment. The effort to maintain control of herself was taking its toll.

  She went into the bathroom and washed her face. She didn’t look as haunted as she felt. The face staring back at her in the mirror was pale and a little haggard but the same beautiful image Joel had given her those many months ago.

  Joel. She felt a sharp pang of regret as she remembered how bitter he had been at the hospital. Not that she could blame him. He cared about Tania and she had almost gotten Tania killed. But if Nicholas was right and Nell was no longer a target, then Tania should also be safe now. She could only hope.

  She dried her face and went to find the kitchen.

  “Pour the coffee and sit down at the bar.” Nicholas was taking plates down from the cabinet. “Food will be ready in a minute.”

  She poured coffee from the automatic maker on the counter and carried the two cups to the breakfast bar.

  Nicholas set the omelettes down on the bar and sat down on the stool across from her. “Bon appétit.”

  She picked up her fork. The omelette was filled with mushrooms and cheese and surprisingly tasty. “It’s good. Did you learn to cook in that kitchen in Hong Kong?”

  “I picked up what I could. Omelettes are easy.” He began to eat. “What are you going to do?”

  “Get Maritz.”

  “You have to have a plan, dammit.”

  “I know that. I’ll have one. I haven’t had time to think yet.”

  “Will you listen to mine?”

  “Not if it means waiting.”

  His hand tightened on his fork. “It’s only a little over a month, dammit.”