Worth It

by Linda Kage

  If I’d never met her in the woods and spent an entire summer learning what love was, I might’ve been a lot more hostile. I might’ve been filled with more hate than Rocket was. But there were so many better things to hold on to than animosity. The part of me that clung to the love we’d once shared would never let me stoop to Rocket’s bitter level.

  “No,” was all I could tell her. There was dark shit in me, but I wasn’t filled with hatred.

  She sent me a small smile and nodded. “Good.” When she turned toward her room, I said, “You need to stay away from him.”

  She glanced back at me as if I’d lost my mind. “Excuse me?”

  “I didn’t like the way he glared at you. He thinks you’re one of them, and he’d probably have no qualms about seeking his misplaced sense of justice by going after you.”

  Shaking her head, she said, “What’re you saying? You think he’s the person leaving the ‘death threats’ on my locker?”

  “I don’t know. But I’m going to find out.”

  An impasse seemed to sprout between Knox and me the night following his encounter with his brother. I stopped pressing him for more and he stopped pushing me away. But there was still a distance between us I couldn’t stand.

  He was gone Saturday morning when I woke, probably working out at the gym he’d yet to tell me he frequented. But he’d brewed my coffee, and it was waiting in its carafe for me when I stumbled into the kitchen. I tried not to let that affect me, but I was still touched by his thoughtfulness.

  The rest of the day, I hung out in my room, only coming out when I heard him leave the kitchen or bathroom, and he seemed to do the same. The living room had become a no man’s land where neither of us spent any time.

  It was pretty depressing, and I wondered how long we could keep this up. It didn’t feel as if it could last forever. In fact, the entire day felt like the calm before a storm.

  I just had no idea the storm would come in the form of a perky brunette named Reese. She called early Sunday morning.

  “Hey, I was just curious if you and Knox could come a little earlier to lunch today?”

  Sitting up in bed and yawning as I scratched my scalp, I tried to wake my brain enough to figure out what the heck Mason’s girlfriend was talking about. I’d only spoken to her a handful of times when she’d visited the club. I couldn’t figure out why she was calling me or even why she was talking about me and Knox together. So I finally just said, “What lunch?”

  “Oh!” She let out an embarrassed sound. “Sorry, did he not tell you about the invite? Such a guy. I should’ve called you Thursday and followed up on the details. Anyway, everyone is invited to our place today for some good eats. But I was hoping you two could come just a wee bit earlier. I have some...information for him.”

  I frowned, really confused and twice as curious. “You know Knox?”

  “Uh...no. We’ve never met. But...still. I’d really like to meet him today.”

  “Well...” I looked around my room, trying to wake up fully. “Okay. I guess. What time did you want us there?”

  After we finalized the details, I hung up. And then I realized what I’d just done. Knox probably wasn’t going to like me making plans for him without his permission. Worried what kind of reaction he was going to have, I stumbled out of bed, fully awake.

  But he was already gone. In the kitchen, my coffee was waiting, but today he’d even set out my favorite mug next to it. I made myself some breakfast, ate it, and then cleaned up after myself before he returned.

  When he finally opened the front door, I was sitting on the couch, the one and only piece of furniture we had in the living room, and sipping on my third cup.

  He paused when he saw me.

  “Morning,” I offered with a vague smile. “How was your workout today?”

  Surprise colored his features, but he finally said, “Fine.” He slowly shut the door behind him, then leaned against it as he eyed me warily. “I’ve been working with a boxing trainer.”

  I totally wasn’t expecting him to just volunteer a piece of information, so I almost cried when he did. After a deep breath of barely keeping it together, I nodded. “So you box now?”

  He shrugged. “I guess.” He glanced away, and I swear I saw his cheeks flush. “I kind of like it.”

  Wow. Two rare gems of information from him...all within thirty seconds of each other, too. This must be my lucky day. “Do you think you’ll take it up professionally?”

  “I don’t know,” he mumbled. “Maybe. My trainer seems to think I have promise.”

  I smiled, glad he’d found something he liked and was good at. It was a far cry from opening a tree nursery, but he was no longer that boy, and I was slowly adjusting to the person he’d become.

  “Then you should do it,” I encouraged.

  He looked at me directly, his brown eyes filled with suspicion. “What’s going on?” he demanded.

  Geesh. I had no idea I was so obvious. But...since he was on to me, I just came out and said, “You forgot to tell me we were invited to lunch at Mason and Reese’s house today.”

  His features instantly closed down. Lowering his brows, he said, “Because I hadn’t planned on going.”

  Oh. Relieved his reason for not telling me wasn’t because he hadn’t wanted me to go with him, I blew out a breath, and almost missed him as he started for his room.

  Popping to my feet, I hurried after him. “But what if I want to go?”

  “Then go,” he answered without pausing or turning back.

  I slowed to a stop, really confused. “You really don’t want to go?”

  Finally at the doorway, he glanced back and sighed. “No. Mason acted too weird when he invited me. Felt like some kind of sneak attack.”

  “Huh.” I frowned. “You caught that too? I felt the same vibe when Reese called me this morning, which was weird because I’ve rarely spoken to her, and she said she’d never met you before, even though she seemed very eager to. But she’s really not the kind of person who, you know, sneakily attacks people.”

  He eyed me a second longer. “So you don’t know what it’s about either?”

  “No. I’m super curious now, though. Aren’t you curious?”

  Shaking his head, he glanced away. “No, not particularly.”

  Well, shit. I huffed out a breath before trying one last vein of coercion. “Will you go with me anyway, so I can find out what’s going on?”

  He opened his mouth and I could see a “no” coming, so I pulled out the one last word I had left in my arsenal.

  “Please?”

  So, we ended up going. I was pretty cheerful the whole ride over, thrilled to know I still had so much pull over Knox, even though he seemed determined to push me away in other areas.

  But then he grew tense and his gaze shifty as we approached Reese and Mason’s front door, as if he were looking for a literal sneak attack. It made me feel crappy for forcing him to come.

  His level of comfort really went out the window when Reese opened the door.

  First thing she did after she pulled us inside was hug him.

  Knox stiffened and sent me a shocked glance as if he wasn’t sure what to do. He ended up not hugging her back but allowing her to hug him for as long as she wanted, which was long enough to make me squirm too.

  When she pulled away, she was brushing tears out of her eyes as she smiled at him.

  “I’m so sorry I’m being such a weirdo. I just...I just really needed to hug you.”

  “Okay...” he said slowly.

  Mason took her hand and drew her close, and she leaned against him as if seeking his support.

  Knox and I exchanged a confused glance.

  But seriously. What the hell?

  “I suppose I should explain to you who I am,” Reese added. “In high school, I went out with a boy named Jeremy Walden.”

  I gasped and whirled to her. “Say what? Eww.”

  “I know.” She rolled her eyes and blushed. �
�It’s still mortifying to admit, but he was the older, popular guy in my high school and—wait. Did you know Jeremy? How did you know Jeremy?”

  “He was my father’s lawyer’s son.”

  “Oh, wow. Then that would mean...” She moved a finger between Knox and me. “Weird.”

  “I know. Small world, huh?”

  “Really, incredibly small world.”

  I nodded. “Yeah. And I still can’t believe you went out with that sleazeball. He always, always, gave me the creeps.” And Mason was like a million times the better choice in boyfriends. How the heck had she dated two such polar opposite men?

  Looking ashamed, she pressed tighter against Mason, who wrapped an arm around her waist. “You don’t have to tell me what an idiot I was. I finally realized it...too late. We dated a few years until I finally broke it off with him. But he started to stalk me and terrorize me until...he tried to kill me.”

  Lifting her hair, she turned her head to show us a white scar slashed across the back of her neck. “Got me right here with his knife.”

  Knox lifted his hand to his own scar on his face. “Yeah, he did have a problem with slashing, didn’t he? Never did learn you were supposed to stab.”

  I shuddered, and Reese seemed similarly shaken. “He got you too, huh?” she murmured empathetically. “Bastard.”

  “Wait, I’m confused.” Shaking my hands, I stepped forward. “How can you be that girl? The news said Jeremy’s ex-girlfriend was named—”

  “Teresa Nolan?” Reese sent me a small smile. “I changed my name and moved halfway across the country to Florida to escape him. But...he found me there.”

  “And shot some other girl while he was there,” I murmured, remembering what I’d heard on the news when Jeremy had been arrested.

  “Eva,” Reese said, making my mouth drop open in shock. “But obviously, she turned out okay.”

  “Shit,” I heard myself murmur, because, well...shit. This was not what I was expecting to hear when I’d come here today.

  Knox also seemed dazed from all the news. “Well, that explains why Pick told me he owed me one.”

  “Exactly.” Reese blew out a deep breath. “You killed the guy who shot his woman.”

  I studied Knox’s face as she said that, and he blanched badly.

  “And I don’t have nightmares any longer because of you,” Reese went on. “I used to obsess and get so paranoid, and with good reason, since he always found me no matter how far I ran or where I hid. I didn’t think even prison could keep him away.”

  “She would wake up, gasping for breath and crying,” Mason said, rubbing Reese’s back. “But after he died, all that went away. You gave her peace of mind.”

  Knox nodded, but he still didn’t look well. He reached out as if he needed a wall or something to support him, so I took his hand. He jumped at the contact and sent me a sharp glance, but a second later, he tightened his grip.

  “I wasn’t sure if I wanted to meet you when I first learned you were working at Forbidden.” Reese rubbed her arms as if she were cold. “I mean, you literally took my nightmares away, but...” She shook her head. “I still didn’t know anything about you. I didn’t know if you were like him or—”

  “I understand,” Knox said quietly.

  “But then I listened to Eva describe you and Mason talk about you, and I heard about what you did for Zoey, and Asher, and Felicity. Eva even told me about some of the history between you two that Pick had told her... So I decided maybe I could face you enough to thank you. But then...then my mother came to visit a few days ago, and after what she told me and gave me, I knew I owed it to you to have this meeting.”

  “What did your mother tell you?” I asked.

  Reese blew out a breath and sent Knox a cautious glance. “Do you know why you were released from prison?”

  Knox’s eyebrows furrowed. “I was let out on parole.”

  She shook her head. “No. You’re not out on parole. Is that what they told you?”

  I could feel the confusion ooze off him as he stared at Reese. “Well...no. They just told me I was being released that day, but I had over twenty years left. Wouldn’t it have to be...?”

  “They fucked up. They fucked up bad. So you’re out, completely, free and clear. My mom,” she paused to roll her eyes, “has kind of been obsessed with Jeremy’s family ever since he was arrested. She hated the way they protected him for so long. So when all this went down, she had an inside track.”

  “When what went down?” I asked, shaking my head.

  “Apparently Bancroft Walden, Jeremy’s dad, and the head warden at Statesburg where Knox was kept were close golfing buddies. When, uh, when what happened between you and Jeremy happened, there was a video...of the whole thing.”

  Knox’s fingers clamped down on mine. “A video?” he echoed, turning gray.

  Reese sent him a sympathetic wince, then shared a look with Mason before nodding. “It showed how you didn’t kill them in cold blood, how the entire thing was self-defense, and...well, the warden hid the video so Jeremy’s super dirty lawyer father could charge you with manslaughter and you’d have to stay in jail longer. But after the warden died of a massive heart attack a week or two before you were released, the video was found in his office, and the truth behind that...event finally came to light to other authority members. There is a complete clusterfuck going on in that penitentiary right now, finger pointing, more illegal stuff coming to light, all kinds of things. I wouldn’t be surprised if the whole place was shut down soon. If you wanted to, you could probably sue them for, like, beaucoups of money.”

  Knox’s hand suddenly fell slack from mine. I lost my grip on him as he shifted backward. Instead of mentioning anything about taking legal action, though, all he could repeat was, “A video. There’s a fucking video of it?”

  “And that’s not the worst part,” a worried-looking Reese reported, bringing her hands to her mouth. “Copies were made and...distributed. My mother somehow got her hands on one. She gave it to me. And before you ask, no, I’m sure none of her resources obtained it legally.”

  A strangled sob tore from Knox’s throat. I thought he was going to pass out; he looked so pale. But when I reached for him, he held up his hand, warding me off. His gaze never left Reese. “Did you watch it?”

  Mason and Reese exchanged guilty glances.

  “Oh...shit,” Knox rasped as he whirled away to pace the room, rubbing his hands over his head. “You saw... you...?”

  “We didn’t watch all of it,” Reese rushed to reassure him. “We...couldn’t. It was too awful. We just saw—”

  “Enough to know what fucking happened?” Knox snapped.

  Mason stepped between himself and Reese. “We only saw enough to know that whatever happened after that point, those bastards deserved it. It was self-defense; they were going to kill you.”

  I gasped and slapped my hands over my mouth. Knox seared me with a sharp, wild glance but turned right back to Reese and Mason. “Destroy it. I want that fucking video destroyed.”

  “You got it. Absolutely,” Reese was quick to say, bobbing her head rapidly.

  Knox nodded too, but that seemed to be all he could take. Mumbling something about how he had to go, he turned for the door and took off, slamming it behind him. I was so tempted to go after him, but I knew he wouldn’t talk to me. And besides, my curiosity was killing me.

  I whirled to Reese. “I want that video.”

  Her eyes widened, and she opened her mouth before glancing at Mason. But he shook his head emphatically.

  Wincing, Reese turned back to me. “That...might not be such a good idea, Felicity. I mean, it’s...wow. Extremely violent, graphic, and disturbing are understatements for what this video shows.” She shivered and hugged herself. “It’s probably best if you don’t see it.”

  Pfft. As if that would stop me. “I don’t care what it shows. I have to see it.” It held the key to the new Knox. I knew it. “I need to know what happened.”
/>
  Reese looked tempted. But when she opened her mouth, Mason said, “No. He asked us to destroy it, and we should. If I were him, I’d never want it to see the light of day, either.”

  “But if I knew a video of something bad happening to you existed, I’d want to see it, too,” Reese argued pleadingly.

  “And I would never want you to go through that,” Mason argued. Then he glanced at me. “You’re not watching it.”

  “Mason!” Reese yelped, setting her hands on her hips. “You’re not being—”

  “Look, I watched the whole thing, okay.”

  “You...you what?” Reese shook her head, frowning. “When did you do that?”

  “Later. After you went to bed. I don’t know why, but I had to see it through. I just...I couldn’t end it like that, after seeing what we saw.”

  “What did you see?” I demanded, about ready to tear down their apartment around them to look for this video myself.

  Reese gulped, and Mason wouldn’t meet my gaze as he ran his fingers through his hair.

  “They raped him,” Reese finally mumbled to her feet.

  “Reese,” Mason gritted out.

  I had to wait until my ears stopped ringing before I took a deep breath, licked my dry lips and carefully said, “Excuse me?”

  Reese was having a stare down with her man. “If it were you, I would want to know.”

  Mason growled out a sound and whirled away as he clutched his head. “It wasn’t our place to tell her, sweet pea.”

  “Wait.” I held up my hand, which I realized was quivering like crazy. “You’re joking, right? I mean, that doesn’t really happen in prison. That only happens in the movies?” When neither Reese nor Mason answered, I bit out, “Right?”

  Tears coated Reese’s lashes. “I am so sorry, Felicity.”

  I shook my head. “No. That’s not...it’s not even possible. It couldn’t have happened. No! Not to Knox.”

  “I don’t think it was the first time either,” Reese whispered.

  Mason made a sound from across the room, letting us know he didn’t approve of her giving me more details. But Reese hugged herself and kept watching me. “At the beginning of the video, there were three of them who ganged up on him. And their leader guy...the way he talked to Knox, he made it sound as if he’d caught Knox before, and you know...raped him before. And Knox made it sound that way too. He said he wasn’t letting that guy touch him ever again, not over his dead body.”