Magical Midlife Invasion

by Breene, K. F.

  I let it go. It would just be easier. My mom was on board, and my dad had an explanation he could live with. If I couldn’t call that a win, I could at least call it good enough.

  “Anyway,” I said, “Mom says you guys are leaving tomorrow?”

  “Yeah, it’s probably for the best. There is too much excitement around here for me.” My dad patted his belly. “The plumber has our toilet patched up and they’re working on fixing the water damage, so we’re about ready, anyway.”

  “Well, it was nice having you,” I said, aiming for an even tone. It was almost truthful. Next time would be much easier, if there was a next time.

  “Yeah, thanks for having us. Oh, Jessie, where’s that big fella you pal around with? Not the really hairy one, but the other one? What is he, six-two or three?”

  “Austin. He had to head to his bar.”

  “Oh, too bad. He’s a good guy. Well, you know, I don’t like to get involved in these types of things, but if shopping came to buying, I don’t think you could go wrong with a guy like that. You know…” He adjusted in his seat, squinting at the ceiling. “Matt was always a fine choice—” He motioned to Niamh. “Matt was her ex. He was fine. Had a good job, good…” He paused. “He was all right. But that Austin fellow—well, he’s a bit more capable, you know what I mean? He’s a bit more solid regarding the important things in life.”

  “Like helping run the cult, ye mean,” Niamh said. I glared at her again.

  “Not… No, not the cult so much, but… Well, anyway. He seems capable, is all. He’d be one to protect you, not leave you out to dry. From what I’ve seen in the last week, you need it.”

  “Boy, doesn’t she ever,” Niamh agreed. “She’s in up to her eyeballs most times.”

  “Would you stop?” I said through my teeth. She grinned at me.

  “Anyway…” He squinted at me this time. “What is the story with all the people around here in capes? That’s an awfully odd uniform choice for the cult. I think you should let them dress normally.”

  Niamh’s face turned bright red and she shook in her seat, clearly holding back laughter. I didn’t even know what to say.

  Foreign footsteps traveled up the walkway. The humor dripped off Niamh’s face, and I could feel Mr. Tom heading to the door.

  “I’ll be right back, Dad,” I said, stepping out into the hall as someone knocked.

  “Jessie, let Earl get it,” Niamh called.

  Mr. Tom was heading toward the stairs, but I closed the distance to the door anyway, feeling Niamh walking my way. I half expected to find Elliot Graves on my doorstep, tired of all these close calls and cat-and-mouse games, come to grab me himself. It would sure put a fast end to our drawn-out situation.

  But when I opened the door, two boys in blue stood there, one I recognized from a previous house call, under similar circumstances, and one I did not.

  “Ah, fer feck’s sakes, Chuck, what are you at?” Niamh kept walking toward the door as Mr. Tom jogged down the stairs.

  The younger guy with close-cropped brown hair, a large chin, and hands braced on his utility belt gave Niamh a bulldog-type stare. “I’ve had some complaints about the noise,” he said to me.

  “What noise?” Niamh looked around. “We’re just enjoying an evening in, so we are.”

  “Yes, yes, we know the very idea of police officers doing their job is offensive to you, you crusty old woman.” Mr. Tom stepped between Niamh and the officers with a wide, very fake smile. “My apologies. She isn’t housebroken.”

  “They know who I am.” Niamh stepped out of Mr. Tom’s way. “I’ve been mindin’ me manners, haven’t I, boys? Haven’t had to take me in in a dog’s age, have ye? No. So why ye’re comin’ to pick on me now, I haven’t—”

  I walked out onto the porch and shut the door behind me, the officers moving back quickly so I wasn’t in their space. “Don’t mind her. She isn’t great with authority. Which you know, I’m sure.” I smiled nervously, then licked my lips, then wished I hadn’t licked my lips because it probably made me look guilty.

  A light clicked on overhead, and the door opened again, Mr. Tom stepping into the space.

  The officers squinted at us, and I realized we hadn’t cleaned off all the dirt.

  “Looks like you had some issues with your yard.” The older cop in the back clicked his flashlight on and painted light across the dirt lines running through the grass. Someone had, thankfully, turned the base lights off, so the damage wasn’t quite as noticeable or glaring.

  “Yes. Edgar is planning some improvements,” I said quickly.

  “Hello…”

  The cops both flinched, dropping their hands to their guns but not taking them out.

  Edgar waved to them from the corner of the house. “It’ll look worse before it looks better, but don’t you worry, we’ll be a shoo-in to win first place at the garden festival this year. This yard will really sing. I have big plans!”

  “Yes, well…” The officer clicked off his light. “It seems there was some yelling from this area not too long ago.”

  Genuinely confused, if only because there’d been a noise block, I looked back at Mr. Tom. “Did you hear anything?”

  “I most certainly did not. Edgar was howling much earlier than that—he gets in an awful state when he rips at the garden—but we’ve kept to ourselves as normal.”

  The younger one, Chuck, took his hand off his gun. “Well, Niamh has been downright placid since you came to live here, ma’am. We thank you for that.”

  “Oh.” I put my hand to my chest. “I don’t know that that’s necessarily my doing…”

  “It certainly doesn’t seem like it has hurt.” He nodded at me, eyed the front yard, and stepped back. “If there isn’t any trouble…?”

  “No.” I shrugged, also looking around the front yard. “No trouble.”

  Chuck nodded. “Just try to keep it down.”

  “Thank you, officers.” Mr. Tom pushed back into the house, gesturing for me to follow. “We’ll try to keep a leash on her.”

  Edgar waved awkwardly when they glanced back at him. They wisely pretended not to notice.

  I stayed outside for a moment, checking the dark, silent street, wondering if a man with a goatee would appear out of nowhere and whisper on the wind. Nothing happened, though. I waved as the police car pulled out of the circular end of the street, and then closed the door on the crazy aftermath of the day. If Elliot Graves had called the cops this time, he hadn’t done it so he could make an appearance.

  I wondered if he would.

  I wondered if I would actually meet him soon, like he’d promised those many months ago.

  I wondered if I’d escape his next attempt to capture me.

  Twenty-Five

  “Ready?” I asked Ulric and Jasper, the only two gargoyles I’d offered a place on my team. A permanent place, with an assigned seat and Ivy House magic. They were the only two who’d really jibed with the house crew, and who also did great work with very little prompting. They followed me loyally and gave their all when helping me train and in battle. I could do far worse than these two.

  It had been only two days since the battle, but I hadn’t wanted to keep stringing them along. Everyone needed an answer, including the gargoyles I wouldn’t be using. They’d agreed to stay, anyway, and would be joining Austin’s pack once he got around to officially forming one.

  Jasper nodded, as silent and resolute as always, but Ulric shifted in place, a sheen of sweat covering his forehead and his mouth a thin line.

  We stood just outside the council room. The house crew was already seated, waiting for Ivy House to assign roles to these two.

  “You okay?” I asked Ulric quietly.

  He wiped his hands on his crisp black dress shirt—his palms were apparently sweating, and he was too distracted to realize how gross that was. “Yeah. It’s just…” He licked his lips and his eyes turned glassy. “If my mom could see me now. No one ever thought I’d amount to anything. T
hey looked down on me, looked down on her because of me—she’s the only one who believed I’d make something of myself. And here I am, about to join the most elite force my kind could hope for. I get to help protect a female gargoyle, one of only three gargoyles chosen for that task. All my hard work, all the brick walls standing in my way in life, and now…” He wiped away a tear. “This is a dream come true. Beyond a dream come true. Thank you for choosing me, Miss Jessie. It is an absolute honor.”

  I pulled him into a hug. “You earned it.” I didn’t have the heart to tell him that if he wanted an elite force, this wasn’t the place. If he hadn’t figured that out already, he had blinders on as thick as my father’s.

  “Okay, when you get in there, you just let the house steer you, okay? I choose the people; she chooses the seats.”

  They nodded, and I turned, walking slowly into the room in a pantsuit that somewhat matched the color of my gargoyle skin. Mr. Tom had tried to sew rainbow-colored sparkly streamers to the back, signifying the eddies of light, but I’d refused. There had to be lines drawn against the weird in this house or it would run amok.

  A tray of champagne sat on the little table by the window. I passed it and made my way into the center of the circle, smiling at Austin in his number one seat, and glancing at the others—Edgar in the twelfth seat, Mr. Tom in the ninth, and Niamh in the third.

  I put my hand out toward the door.

  “Please welcome our newest members to the circle.”

  Ulric and Jasper walked in slowly, their path leading them around the outside of the seats until they reached the little flag behind Austin’s chair, a space separating him and Edgar, allowing the two gargoyles to enter the circle, one at a time.

  Ulric went first, pausing three steps in, as though he were listening. Then he kept walking until he about-faced in front of the sixth seat, wiped another tear, and sat.

  “He is your balance,” Ivy House whispered to me. “When the team is fraying, look to him to pull you back together. He has kept his head through much strife in his life, and he will continue to keep his head for this cause.”

  I nodded even as he wiped away another tear.

  Jasper entered next, pausing where Ulric did. He turned before walking to the seventh seat.

  “He’s strong and stoic, he is loyal to a fault, but he needs to be near his kind or he will lose his way. For that reason, I am placing him near Ulric, who will keep as close to him as a brother. Who will pull the gargoyles together much like he will pull the team as a whole together when they fray. You have one or two gargoyles yet to come. Most heirs chose a solid gargoyle team, but this approach you’re taking is wise. Land and sky, many different strengths and weaknesses—I approve of it.”

  “What about Austin? You never gave commentary when he joined.”

  “You must find your own way with him.”

  I put my hands out in an are you serious kind of way. That made literally no sense, given she’d just provided me with a rundown of the other two.

  The silence of the room jogged me out of my annoyance.

  “Welcome,” I said again, smiling at Ulric and Jasper. “Champagne?”

  The celebratory drinks were short-lived before Austin approached me, face stern and chest pointed at the door.

  “I better get going,” he said.

  The energy between us heated up the air. “Sounds good. It was nice seeing you.”

  He looked like he was about to say something, but instead walked past me, out of the door. He didn’t get far before I felt a stranger on the walkway.

  “Man, what happened to a quiet life?” I muttered.

  “Wicked, you can feel where people are in the house,” Ulric said. “And where Jessie—”

  “Wait, Austin.” I caught up to him in the hallway.

  “Listen, Jess, I really feel like we need to give each other some space at the moment,” he said in a gush of words. “We’re getting a little too close in the wrong ways. We just need to take a step back and regroup, I think. We work together, and I know you didn’t want to cross that line. And I’m… I live a solo life. For good reason. For an important reason. I don’t want to cross that line.”

  The words were a machine-gun-fire affirmation of what I’d suspected he had been thinking. They were completely true, and more, they were responsible. I couldn’t help that they still hurt.

  I tried my best to brush it off.

  “Awesome, yeah, that sounds good, but wait before going out the door. I’ve got a visitor.” I pushed past him.

  A man started when I pulled open the door, his brown delivery service uniform wrinkled and his truck crookedly parked by the curb. He eyed the scarred lawn for a moment before holding out a letter. “I’ll need a signature.”

  “Allow me.” Mr. Tom stepped around me, took the letter, and held out his hand for the tablet to sign.

  “Uhmm…no.” The man read his tablet. “Jacinta Evans. I need a signature from her.”

  “Give the thing over to him,” Niamh said, passing by the door. “Since when do people like you care about your work?”

  “Ignore that insufferable old woman.” Mr. Tom smiled kindly at the deliveryman. “Though she does have a point. I sign for the letters and packages at this house. It is my role. I am protected against those sorts of curses.” He took the tablet. “I’m sure you understand.”

  “There is no way he understands,” I said, standing off to the side while Mr. Tom took care of it. I knew better than to fight him about it.

  The delivery guy glanced at me from under his eyelashes, his eyes so pale blue they almost didn’t register as a color. He shrugged. “Whatever.”

  Once the letter was signed for, Mr. Tom worked at the top, trying to open it.

  “Would you…” I grabbed it. “I can open it myself, thanks.”

  He scowled at me, sniffed, and re-entered the house. “Who would like some snacks? Caviar, anyone? The parents are gone and we have two new additions, so I think that calls for a little something extra.”

  The delivery guy glanced at the tablet before making his way back to his truck.

  Austin joined me on the front porch, pausing for a moment. “Sorry about that,” he said softly.

  “What’s that?” I opened the envelope as the delivery truck started up.

  “About what I said in there. Or…actually, the way that I said it. I came off as obtuse. I just have a lot of things going on right now. I don’t have a lot of time.”

  “Austin, it’s fine. Don’t worry about it.” I pulled a second envelope out of the delivery envelope, this one square and a matte black. “You were absolutely right.” I met his eyes, tucking the delivery envelope under my arm so I could get at the other one. “We’ve been getting close in the wrong ways. You have your lone cowboy thing, and I want to keep things professional. We both know this.”

  “It’s just…”

  I peeled back the flap on the black envelope, looking up as the delivery truck started forward. The driver waved as I pulled out the card inside.

  I waved back with the card before glancing down at it. My world went white and hazy for a moment.

  “What is it?” Austin asked.

  I pulled the delivery envelope from under my arm. It didn’t have an address on it. Not a return address or one for delivery.

  “It’s from Elliot Graves.” I handed off the card as I ran forward. “Stop!” I sent a jet of magic, a wall, to drop in front of the truck. A hand lazily drifted out of the truck window, flicking. My spell vanished and, a moment later, so did the truck. Vanished like it had never been there.

  “Oh crap.” Breathing heavily, I stopped on the sidewalk, looking down the street. “Was that Elliot Graves himself? He looked twenty! The guy I remember from before seemed like he was in his forties. With a goatee. That guy looked like someone completely different.”

  Austin crouched beside me, then straightened up and shook his head. “No smell.” He brought the card to his nose, then the envelope that h
e’d taken from me. “No smells on anything. The best mages can alter their appearance.”

  Austin looked down at the card before handing it over.

  I took it.

  Roses are red,

  Violets are blue,

  Your growth is startling,

  I thought I had you.

  -Elliot Graves

  P.S. Protect yourself. It’s a madhouse out there.

  All I could do was stare. He’d been on my property. He’d hand-delivered me mail!

  “He’s playing games with me,” I said, something in my middle clenching. “This is all a game to him.”

  “For now.” Austin’s voice was rough. “Nothing changes. We still need to prepare. Given his schedule so far, it seems like we’ve got a couple months before his next move. That’s enough time.” He put a hand on my shoulder. “I’ll be well underway with a pack by then, Jess, and you’ll have grown leaps and bounds again. In two months, we’ll be ready.”

  I hoped he was right. Even if he wasn’t, Elliot Graves was clearly much too invested to walk away. He would come for me eventually, and when he did, I had no choice but to be ready.

  “Best get some champagne,” I said, heading into the house. “It’ll dull the anxiety.”

  Austin didn’t follow me inside, and I paused to say goodbye. He stared down the street for a beat, his body tense, as though indecisive. When I opened my mouth to speak, he sagged, as though defeated. He turned toward me.

  “I’ll tell Mr. Tom to pour me a glass, too,” he said.

  I started in surprise. “Oh. Are you sure— Wait.” I smiled, suddenly warm and fuzzy. “You’re using his made-up name!”

  A grin worked at his lips. “A good friend asked me to. It’s hard to say no to her.”

  I beamed at him. “He’ll be so happy. After the stress with my parents, he’ll really appreciate it.”

  “Jess, listen.” He clasped my arm. “I don’t want to mess anything up with you. You are incredibly important to me. That’s all I meant earlier. I want to be the man you need me to be, not the mess that I am. A little bit of space will get my head back on straight, that’s all.”