One Thousand and One Nights

by Richard Burton

  So she arose and returned to her house, whilst El Merouzi abode in his place till the night was half spent, when he said to himself, ‘How long [is this to last]? Yet how can I let this knavish dog die and lose the money? Methinks I were better open the tomb on him and bring him forth and take my due of him by dint of grievous beating and torment.’ Accordingly, he dug him up and pulled him forth of the tomb; after which he betook himself to an orchard hard by the burial-ground and cut thence staves and palm sticks. Then he tied the dead man’s legs and came down on him with the staff and beat him grievously; but he stirred not. When the time grew long on him, his shoulders became weary and he feared lest some one of the watch should pass on his round and surprise him. So he took up Er Razi and carrying him forth of the cemetery, stayed not till he came to the Magians’ burying-place and casting him down in a sepulchre there, rained heavy blows upon him till his shoulders failed him, but the other stirred not Then he sat down by his side and rested; after which he rose and renewed the beating upon him, [but to no better effect; and thus he did] till the end of the night

  Now, as destiny would have it, a band of thieves, whose use it was, whenas they had stolen aught, to resort to that place and divide [their booty], came thither [that night], as of their wont; and they were ten in number and had with them wealth galore, which they were carrying. When they drew near the sepulchre, they heard a noise of blows within it and the captain said, ‘This is a Magian whom the angels are tormenting.’ So they entered [the burial-ground] and when they came over against El Merouzi, he feared lest they should be the officers of the watch come upon him, wherefore he [arose and] fled and stood among the tombs. The thieves came up to the place and finding Er Razi bound by the feet and by him near seventy sticks, marvelled at this with an exceeding wonderment and said, ‘God confound thee! This was sure an infidel, a man of many crimes; for, behold, the earth hath rejected him from her womb, and by my life, he is yet fresh! This is his first night [in the tomb] and the angels were tormenting him but now; so whosoever of you hath a sin upon his conscience, let him beat him, as a propitiatory offering to God the Most High.’ And the thieves said, ‘We all have sins upon our consciences.’

  So each of them went up to the [supposed] dead man and dealt him nigh upon a hundred blows, exclaiming the while, one, ‘This is for my father!’ and another, ‘This is for my grandfather!’ whilst a third said, ‘This is for my brother!’ and a fourth, ‘This is for my mother!’ And they gave not over taking turns at him and beating him, till they were weary, what while El Merouzi stood laughing and saying in himself, ‘It is not I alone who have entered into sin against him. There is no power and no virtue save in God the Most High, the Supreme!’

  Then the thieves addressed themselves to sharing their booty and presently fell out concerning a sword that was among the spoil, who should take it. Quoth the captain, ‘Methinks we were better prove it; so, if it be good, we shall know its worth, and if it be ill, we shall know that.’ And they said, ‘Try it on this dead man, for he is fresh.’ So the captain took the sword and drawing it, poised it and brandished it; but, when Er Razi saw this, he made sure of death and said in himself, ‘I have borne the washing and the boiling water and the pricking with the knife and the grave and its straitness and all this [beating], trusting in God that I might be delivered from death, and [hitherto] I have been delivered; but, as for the sword, I may not brook that, for but one stroke of it, and I am a dead man.’

  So saying, he sprang to his feet and catching up the thigh-bone of one of the dead, cried out at the top of his voice, saying, ‘O ye dead, take them!’ And he smote one of them, whilst his comrade [El Merouzi] smote another and they cried out at them and buffeted them on the napes of their necks; whereupon the thieves left that which was with them of plunder and fled; and indeed their wits forsook them [for terror] and they stayed not in their flight till they came forth of the Magians’ burial-ground and left it a parasang’s length behind them, when they halted, trembling and affrighted for the soreness of that which had betided them of fear and amazement at the dead.

  As for Er Razi and El Merouzi, they made peace with each other and sat down to share the booty. Quoth El Merouzi, ‘I will not give thee a dirhem of this money, till thou pay me my due of the money that is in thy house.’ And Er Razi said ‘I will not do it, nor will I subtract this from aught of my due.’ So they fell out upon this and disputed with one another and each went saying to his fellow, ‘I will not give thee a dirhem!’ And words ran high between them and contention was prolonged.

  Meanwhile, when the thieves halted, one of them said to the others, ‘Let us return and see;’ and the captain said, ‘This thing is impossible of the dead: never heard we that they came to life on this wise. So let us return and take our good, for that the dead have no occasion for good.’ And they were divided in opinion as to returning: but [presently they came to a decision and] said, ‘Indeed, our arms are gone and we cannot avail against them and will not draw near the place where they are: only let one of us [go thither and] look at it, and if he hear no sound of them, let him advertise us what we shall do.’ So they agreed that they should send a man of them and assigned him [for this service] two parts [of the booty].

  Accordingly, he returned to the burial-ground and gave not over going till he stood at the door of the sepulchre, when he heard El Merouzi say to his fellow, ‘I will not give thee a single dirhem of the money!’ The other said the like and they were occupied with contention and mutual revilement and talk. So the thief returned in haste to his fellows, who said, ‘What is behind thee?’ Quoth he, ‘Get you gone and flee for your lives and save yourselves, O fools; for that much people of the dead are come to life and between them are words and contention.’ So the thieves fled, whilst the two sharpers retained to Er Razi’s house and made peace with one another and laid the thieves’ purchase to the money they had gotten aforetime and lived a while of time. Nor, O king of the age,” added the vizier, “is this rarer or more marvellous than the story of the four sharpers with the money-changer and the ass.”

  When the king heard this story, he smiled and it pleased him and he bade the vizier go away to his own house.

  John Payne’s translation: detailed table of contents

  The Twenty-Second Night of the Month.

  When the evening evened, the king summoned the vizier and required of him the hearing of the [promised] story. So he said, “Hearkening and obedience. Know, O king, that

  John Payne’s translation: detailed table of contents

  STORY OF THE SHARPERS WITH THE MONEY-CHANGER AND THE ASS.

  Four sharpers once plotted against a money-changer, a man of abounding wealth, and agreed upon a device for the taking of somewhat of his money. So one of them took an ass and laying on it a bag, wherein was money, lighted down at the money-changer’s shop and sought of him change for the money. The money- changer brought out to him the change and bartered it with him, whilst the sharper was easy with him in the matter of the exchange, so he might give him confidence in himself. [As they were thus engaged,] up came the [other three] sharpers and surrounded the ass; and one of them said, ‘[It is] he,’ and another said, ‘Wait till I look at him.’ Then he fell to looking on the ass and stroking him from his mane to his crupper; whilst the third went up to him and handled him and felt him from head to tail, saying, ‘ Yes, [it is] in him.’ Quoth another, [‘Nay,] it is not in him.’ And they gave not over doing the like of this.

  Then they accosted the owner of the ass and chaffered with him and he said, ‘I will not sell him but for ten thousand dirhems.’ They offered him a thousand dirhems; but he refused and swore that he would not sell the ass but for that which he had said. They ceased not to add to their bidding, till the price reached five thousand dirhems, whilst their fellow still said, ‘I will not sell him but for ten thousand dirhems.’ The money-changer counselled him to sell, but he would not do this and said to him, ‘Harkye, gaffer! Thou hast no knowledge of this ass’s case.
Concern thyself with silver and gold and what pertaineth thereto of change and exchange; for indeed the virtue of this ass passeth thy comprehension. To every craft its craftsman and to every means of livelihood its folk.’

  When the affair was prolonged upon the three sharpers, they went away and sat down a little apart; then they came up to the money-changer privily and said to him, ‘If thou canst buy him for us, do so, and we will give thee a score of dirhems.’ Quoth he, ‘Go away and sit down afar from him.’ So they did his bidding and the money-changer went up to the owner of the ass and gave not over tempting him with money and cajoling him and saying, ‘Leave yonder fellows and sell me the ass, and I will reckon him a gift from thee,’ till he consented to sell him the ass for five thousand and five hundred dirhems. Accordingly the money-changer counted down to him five thousand and five hundred dirhems of his own money, and the owner of the ass took the price and delivered the ass to him, saying, ‘Whatsoever betideth, though he abide a deposit about thy neck, sell him not to yonder rogues for less than ten thousand dirhems, for that they would fain buy him because of a hidden treasure whereof they know, and nought can guide them thereto but this ass. So close thy hand on him and gainsay me not, or thou wilt repent.’

  So saying, he left him and went away, whereupon up came the three other sharpers, the comrades of him of the ass, and said to the money-changer, ‘God requite thee for us with good, for that thou hast bought him! How can we requite thee!’ Quoth he, ‘I will not sell him but for ten thousand dirhems.’ When they heard this, they returned to the ass and fell again to examining him and handling him. Then said they to the money-changer, ‘We were mistaken in him. This is not the ass we sought and he is not worth more than half a score paras to us.’ Then they left him and offered to go away, whereat the money-changer was sore chagrined and cried out at their speech, saying, ‘O folk, ye besought me to buy him for you and now I have bought him, ye say, “We were deceived [in him], and he is not worth more than ten paras to us.”’ Quoth they, ‘We supposed that in him was that which we desired; but, behold, in him is the contrary of that which we want; and indeed he hath a default, for that he is short of back.’ And they scoffed at him and went away from him and dispersed.

  The money-changer thought they did but finesse with him, that they might get the ass at their own price; but, when they went away from him and he had long in vain awaited their return, he cried out, saying, ‘Woe!’ and ‘Ruin!’ and ‘Alack, my sorry chance!’ and shrieked aloud and tore his clothes. So the people of the market assembled to him and questioned him of his case; whereupon he acquainted them with his plight and told them what the sharpers had said and how they had beguiled him and how it was they who had cajoled him into buying an ass worth half a hundred dirhems for five thousand and five hundred. His friends blamed him and a company of the folk laughed at him and marvelled at his folly and his credulity in accepting the sharpers’ talk, without suspicion, and meddling with that which he understood not and thrusting himself into that whereof he was not assured.

  On this wise, O King Shah Bekht,” continued the vizier, “is the issue of eagerness for [the goods of] the world and covetise of that which our knowledge embraceth not; indeed, [whoso doth thus] shall perish and repent Nor, O king of the age, (added he) is this story more extraordinary than that of the sharper and the merchants.”

  When the king heard this story, he said in himself, “Verily, had I given ear to the sayings of my courtiers and inclined to the idle prate [of those who counselled me] in the matter of [the slaying of] my vizier, I had repented to the utterest of repentance, but praised be God, who hath disposed me to mansuetude and long-suffering and hath endowed me with patience!” Then he turned to the vizier and bade him return to his dwelling and [dismissed] those who were present, as of wont.

  John Payne’s translation: detailed table of contents

  The Twenty-Third Night of the Month.

  When the evening evened, the king sent after the vizier and when he presented himself before him, he required of him the hearing of the [promised] story. So he said, “Hearkening and obedience. Know, O illustrious lord, that

  John Payne’s translation: detailed table of contents

  STORY OF THE SHARPER AND THE MERCHANTS.

  There was once aforetime a certain sharper, who [was so eloquent that he] would turn the ear inside out, and he was a man of understanding and quick wit and skill and perfection. It was his wont to enter a town and [give himself out as a merchant and] make a show of trafficking and insinuate himself into the intimacy of people of worth and consort with the merchants, for he was [apparently] distinguished for virtue and piety. Then he would put a cheat on them and take [of them] what he might spend and go away to another city; and he ceased not to do thus a great while.

  It befell one day that he entered a certain city and sold somewhat that was with him of merchandise and got him friends of the merchants of the place and fell to sitting with them and entertaining them and inviting them to his lodging and his assembly, whilst they also invited him to their houses. On this wise he abode a long while, till he was minded to leave the city; and this was bruited abroad among his friends, who were concerned for parting from him. Then he betook himself to him of them, who was the richest of them in substance and the most apparent of them in generosity, and sat with him and borrowed his goods; and when he was about to take leave, he desired him to give him the deposit that he had left with him. ‘And what is the deposit?’ asked the merchant. Quoth the sharper, ‘It is such a purse, with the thousand dinars therein.’ And the merchant said, ‘When didst thou give it me?’ ‘Extolled be the perfection of God!’ replied the sharper. ‘Was it not on such a day, by such a token, and thus and thus?’ ‘I know not of this,’ rejoined the merchant, and words were bandied about between them, whilst the folk [who were present also] disputed together concerning their affair and their speech, till their voices rose high and the neighbours had knowledge of that which passed between them.

  Then said the sharper, ‘O folk, this is my friend and I deposited with him a deposit, but he denieth it; so in whom shall the folk put trust after this?’ And they said, ‘This is a man of worth and we have found in him nought but trustiness and loyality and good breeding, and he is endowed with understanding and generosity. Indeed, he avoucheth no falsehood, for that we have consorted with him and mixed with him and he with us and we know the sincerity of his religion.’ Then quoth one of them to the merchant, ‘Harkye, such an one! Bethink thee and consult thy memory. It may not be but that thou hast forgotten.’ But he said, ‘O folk, I know nothing of that which he saith, for indeed he deposited nought with me.’ And the affair was prolonged between them. Then said the sharper to the merchant, ‘I am about to make a journey and have, praised be God the Most High, wealth galore, and this money shall not escape me; but do thou swear to me.’ And the folk said, ‘Indeed, this man doth justice upon himself.’ Whereupon the merchant fell into that which he misliked and came near upon [suffering] loss and ill repute.

  Now he had a friend, who pretended to quickwittedness and understanding; so he came up to him privily and said to him, ‘Let me do, so I may put the change on this trickster, for I know him to be a liar and thou art near upon having to pay the money; but I will turn suspicion from thee and say to him, “The deposit is with me and thou erredst in imagining that it was with other than myself,” and so divert him from thee.’ ‘Do so,’ replied the merchant, ‘and rid the folk of their [false] debts.’

  So the friend turned to the sharper and said to him, ‘O my lord, O such an one, thou goest under a delusion. The purse is with me, for it was with me that thou depositedst it, and this elder is innocent of it.’ But the sharper answered him with impatience and impetuosity, saying, ‘Extolled be the perfection of God! As for the purse that is with thee, O noble and trusty man, I know that it is in the warrant of God and my heart is at ease concerning it, for that it is with thee as it were with me; but I began by demanding that which I deposi
ted with this man, of my knowledge that he coveteth the folk’s good.’ At this the friend was confounded and put to silence and returned not an answer; [and the] only [result of his interference was that] each of them paid a thousand dinars.

  So the sharper took the two thousand dinars and made off; and when he was gone, the merchant said to his friend, the [self-styled] man of wit and intelligence, ‘Harkye, such an one! Thou and I are like unto the hawk and the locust.’ ‘What was their case?’ asked the other; and the merchant said,

  John Payne’s translation: detailed table of contents

  STORY OF THE HAWK AND THE LOCUST.

  ‘There was once, of old time, a hawk who made himself a nest hard by that of a locust, and the latter gloried in his neighbourhood and betaking herself to him, saluted him and said, “O my lord and chief of the birds, indeed the nearness unto thee delighteth me and thou honourest me with thy neighbourhood and my soul is fortified with thee.” The hawk thanked her for this and there ensued friendship between them. One day, the locust said to the hawk, “O chief of the birds, how cometh it that I see thee alone, solitary, having with thee no friend of thy kind of the birds, to whom thou mayst incline in time of easance and of whom thou mayst seek succour in time of stress? Indeed, it is said, ‘Man goeth about seeking the ease of his body and the preservation of his strength, and in this there is nought more necessary to him than a friend who shall be the completion of his gladness and the mainstay of his life and on whom shall be his dependence in his stress and in his ease.’ Now I, albeit I ardently desire thy weal in that which beseemeth thy condition, yet am I weak [and unable] unto that which the soul craveth; but, if thou wilt give me leave, I will seek out for thee one of the birds who shall be conformable unto thee in thy body and thy strength.” And the hawk said, “I commit this to thee and rely upon thee therein.”