One Thousand and One Nights

by Richard Burton

  The Six Hundred and Fifty-fifth Night,

  Dunyazad said to her, “Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be other than sleepy, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short the watching of this our latter night!” She replied, “With love and good will!” It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating, that the Sultan sent after the Darwaysh and bade him be brought into the presence and set between his hands, when he said to him, “O Darwaysh, do thou know ’tis mine aim and intention to slay thee: say me then, hast thou any charge thou wouldst send to thy family?” Quoth the Religious, “Wherefore shouldst thou kill me, O our lord, and what of ill deeds hath proceeded from me that thou shouldst destroy me therefor, and do thou make me aware of my sin, and then if I merit death kill me or decree to me banishment.” Quoth the King, “There is no help but that I slay thee,”165 and the Darwaysh fell to gentling him but it availed him naught; so as soon as he was certified that the Sultan would not release him or dismiss him, he arose and drew a wide ring upon the ground in noose shape and measuring some fifteen ells, within which he described a lesser circle. Then he stood up before the Sovran and said, “O King of the Age, verily this greater circle is the dominion belonging to thee, whilst the lesser round is mine own realm.” So saying he moved from his place and stepped forwards and passing into the smaller ring quoth he, “An thy reign, O King of the Age, be not ample for me I will inhabit my own;” and forthright upon entering the lesser circle he vanished from the view of those present. Cried the Sultan to the Lords of the land, “Seize him”; but they availed not to find him, and after going forth in search they returned and reported that they could light upon no one. Then said the Sovran, “He was beside me in this place and passed into the smaller ring; so do ye seek for him again;” and accordingly they went forth once more but could not see a trace of him. Hereupon the Sultan repented and cried, “There is no Majesty and there is no Might save in Allah the Glorious, the Great: verily we have exceeded in the matter of this Darwaysh and we have hearkened to the words of hypocrites who caused us to fall into trouble by obeying them in all they said to me against him. However, whatso they did to me that will I do unto them.” And as soon as it was morning-tide and the Lords of the land forgathered in the Divan, the Sultan commanded to slay those who had counselled him to kill the Darwaysh, and some of them were done to death and others of them were banished the country.166 Now when the Caliph Harun al-Rashid heard this narrative from Manjab, he wondered with extreme wonderment and said to him, “By Allah, O Manjab, thou deservest to be a cup-companion of the Kings:” so he created him from that moment his Equerry in honour to the Grand Wazir Ja’afar the Barmaki, whereof he had become brother-in-law. Now after some time Al-Rashid asked from Manjab a tale concerning the wiles of womankind, and when the youth hung his head groundwards and blushed before him, Harun said to him, “O Manjab, verily the place of the Kings in privacy is also the place for laying aside gravity.” Said Manjab, “O Prince of True Believers, to-morrow night (Inshallah!) I will tell thee a tale in brief concerning the freaks of the gender feminine, and what things they do with their mates.” Accordingly when night came on, the Caliph sent for and summoned Manjab to the presence, and when he came there he kissed ground and said, “An it be thy will, O Commander of the Faithful, that I relate thee aught concerning the wiles of wives, let it be in a private place lest haply one of the slave girls hear me and any of them report my tale to the Queen.” Quoth Rashid, “This is the right rede which may not be blamed indeed!” So he went with him to a private place concealed from the folk, and took seat, he and the youth, and none beside, when Manjab related to him the following

  Richard Francis Burton’s translation: detailed table of contents

  Tale of the Simpleton Husband.167

  It is related that there was a Badawi man who had a wife and he dwelt under a tent of hair168 in the desert where, as is the fashion of Arabs, he used to shift from site to site for the purpose of pasturing his camels. Now the woman was of exceeding beauty and comeliness and perfection, and she had a friend (also a Badawi man) who at all times would come to her and have his wicked will of her, after which he would wend his ways. But one day of the days her lover visited her and said, “Wallahi, ’tis not possible but that what time we sleep together, I and thou, we make merry with thy husband looking on.” — And Shahrazad was surprised by the dawn of day and fell silent and ceased to say her permitted say. Then quoth her sister Dunyazad, “How sweet is thy story, O sister mine, and how enjoyable and delectable!” Quoth she, “And where is this compared with that I would relate to you on the coming night an the King suffer me to survive?” Now when it was the next night and that was

  The Six Hundred and Fifty-sixth Night,

  Dunyazad said to her, “Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be other than sleepy, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short the watching of this our latter night!” She replied, “With love and good will!” It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating, that the man which was the friend of the Badawi’s wife said to her, “Walláhi, ’tis not possible but that when we make merry, I and thou, thy husband shall look upon us.” Quoth she, “Why should we suffer at such time of our enjoyment either my husband or any wight to be present?” and quoth he, “This must needs be, and unless thou consent I will take to me a mistress other than thyself.” Then said she, “How shall we enjoy ourselves with my husband looking on? This is a matter which may not be managed.” Hereupon the woman sat down and took thought of her affair and how she should do for an hour or so, and presently she arose and dug her amiddlemost the tent a hole169 which would contain a man, wherein she concealed her lover. Now, hard by the tent was a tall sycamore tree,170 and as the noodle her husband was returning from the wild the woman said to him, “Ho thou, Such-an-one! climb up this tree and bring me therefrom a somewhat of figs that we may eat them.” Said he, “’Tis well;” and arising he swarmed up the tree-trunk, when she signed to her lover who came out and mounted and fell to riding upon her. But her mate considered her and cried aloud, “What is this, O whore: doth a man cavalcade thee before me and the while I am looking at thee?” Then he came down from the tree in haste, but he saw no one, for as soon as the lover had finished his business the good-wife thrust him into the hole amiddlemost the tent and covered him with a mat. When the husband went inside to the booth and met his wife he found no stranger with her so said she to him, “O man, thou hast sinned against me, saying, ‘Verily, some one is riding thee’; and thou hast slandered me by falsely charging me with folly.” Quoth he, “By Allah I saw thee with my own eyes;” but quoth she, “Do thou sit here the while I have a look.” Hereupon she arose and swarmed up the trunk and sat upon one of the branches, and as she peered at her spouse she shrieked aloud crying, “O man, do thou have some regard for thine honour. Why do on this wise and lie down and allow a man to ride thee, and at this moment he worketh his will on thee.” Said her husband, “Beside me there is neither man nor boy.” And said she, “Here I am171 looking at thee from the top of this tree.” Quoth he, “O woman, this place must be haunted,172 so let us remove hence;” and quoth she, “Why change our place? rather let us remain therein.” Hereupon the Caliph said to Manjab, “By Allah, verily, this woman was an adulteress;” and the youth replied, “Amongst womankind indeed are many more whorish than this. But of that anon; and now do thou hear from me and learn of me this marvellous tale anent

  Richard Francis Burton’s translation: detailed table of contents

  NOTE CONCERNING THE “TIRREA BEDE,” NIGHT 655.

  Scott refers to a tale in the “Bahar-Danush” (Bahár-i-Dánish); or, “Garden of Knowledge,” translated by himself, story viii. lesson 4; chapter xii. vol. iii. p-68. Cadell & Co., Strand, London, 1799. Five women come from a town to draw water at a well; and, finding
there a young Brahmin, become his teachers and undertake to instruct him in the “Tirrea” or fifth “Veda” — there being only four of these Hindu Scriptures. Each lesson consists of an adventure showing how to cornute a husband, and the fourth runs as follows. I leave them in Scott’s language: —

  The fourth lady through dread of the arrow of whose cunning the warrior of the fifth heaven173 trembled in the sky, like the reed, having bestowed her attention on the pilgrim bramin (Brahman), despatched him to an orchard; and having gone home, said to her husband, “I have heard that in the orchard of a certain husbandman there is a date tree, the fruit of which is of remarkably fine flavour; but what is yet stranger, whoever ascends it, sees many wonderful objects. If to-day, going to visit this orchard, we gather dates from this tree, and also see the wonders of it, it will not be unproductive of amusement.” In short, she so worked upon her husband with flattering speeches and caresses, that nolens volens he went to the orchard, and at the instigation of his wife, ascended the tree. At this instant she beckoned to the bramin, who was previously seated, expectantly, in a corner of the garden.

  The husband, from the top of the tree, beholding what was not fit to be seen, exclaimed in extreme rage, “Ah! thou shameless Russian-born174 wretch, what abominable action is this?” The wife making not the least answer, the flames of anger seized the mind of the man, and he began to descend from the tree; when the bramin with activity and speed having hurried over the fourth section of the Tirrea Bede,175 went his way.

  Richard Francis Burton’s translation: detailed table of contents

  VERSE. The road to repose is that of activity and quickness.

  The wife during her husband’s descent from the tree having arranged her plan, said, “Surely, man, frenzy must have deprived thy brain of the fumes of sense, that having foolishly set up such a cry, and not reflecting upon thine own disgrace (for here, excepting thyself, what male is present?), thou wouldst fix upon me the charge of infidelity?” The husband, when he saw no person near, was astonished, and said to himself, “Certainly, this vision must have been miraculous.”

  The completely artful wife, from the hesitation of her husband, guessed the cause, and impudently began to abuse him. Then instantly tying her vest round her waist she ascended the tree. When she had reached the topmost branch, she suddenly cried out, “O thou shameless man, what abominable action is this! If thy evil star hath led thee from the path of virtue, surely thou mightest have in secret ventured upon it. Doubtless to pull down the curtain of modesty from thy eyes, and with such impudence to commit such a wicked deed, is the very extreme of debauchery.”

  The husband replied, “Woman, do not ridiculously cry out, but be silent; for such is the property of this tree, that whoever ascends it, sees man or woman below in such situations.” The cunning wife now came down, and said to her husband, “What a charming garden and amusing spot is this! where one can gather fruit, and at the same time behold the wonders of the world.” The husband replied, “Destruction seize the wonders which falsely accuse man of abomination!” In short the devilish wife, notwithstanding the impudence of such an action, escaped safely to her house, and the next day, according to custom, attending at the well, introduced the bramin to the ladies, and informed them of her worthy contrivance.176

  Richard Francis Burton’s translation: detailed table of contents

  THE LOVES OF AL-HAYFA AND YUSUF.177

  I had a familiar in the Northern region who was called ‘Abd al-Jawád and he was one of the greatest of merchants there and made of money; also he loved voyage and travel, and at whatever time I visited him and we forgathered, I and he, we exchanged citations of poetry. Now one day my heart yearned to visit him, so I repaired to his place and found him there; and as we came together we both sat down in friendly converse, I and he; and he said to me “O my brother, do thou hear what happened and was accomplished for me in these times. I travelled to the land of Al-Yaman and therein met a familiar who, when we sat down to talk, I and he, said, ‘O my brother, verily there befel me and betided me in the land of Al-Hind a case that was strange and an adventure that was admirable and it ran as follows. There was erewhile a King of the kings of India and one of her greatest, who was abundant in money and troops and guards and he was called Al-Mihrján.178 This same was a lord of high degree and a majestic and he had lived for a long while of his age without having issue male or female. Wherefor he was full of cark and care wanting one who after him would preserve his memory, so he said in his mind one night of the nights, ‘Whenas I die cut off shall be my name, and effaced shall be my fame nor shall anyone remember me.’ So saying he raised both hands to Heaven and humbled himself before Allah (be He extolled and exalted!) to vouchsafe him a child who should outlive him with the view that man might not lose the memory of him. Now one night as he was sleeping a-bed dreaming and drowned in slumber behold, he heard a Voice (without seeing any form) which said to him, ‘O Mihrjan the Sage, and O King of the Age, arouse thee this moment and go to thy wife and lie with her and know her carnally, for she shall indeed conceive of thee at this very hour and bear thee a child which, an it be a boy shall become thine aider in all thine affairs but will, an it prove a girl, cause thy ruin and thy destruction and the uprooting of thy traces.’ When Al-Mihrjan heard from the Speaker these words and such sayings, he left his couch without stay or delay in great joy and gladness and he went to his wife and slept with her and swived her and as soon as he arose from off her she said, ‘O King of the Age, verily I feel that I have become pregnant; and (Inshallah — if Almighty Allah please!) this shall prove the case.’179 When Al-Mihrjan heard the words of his wife he was glad and rejoiced at good news and he caused that night be documented in the archives of his kingdom. Then, when it was morning he took seat upon the throne of his kingship and summoned the Astrologers and the Scribes of characts and Students of the skies and told them what had been accomplished to him in his night and what words he had heard from the Voice; whereupon the Sages one and all struck tables of sand and considered the ascendant. But each and every of them concealed his thought and hid all he had seen nor would any return a reply or aught of address would supply; and said they, ‘O King of the Age, verily appearances in dreams hit the mark at times and at times fly wide; for when a man is of a melancholic humour he seeth in his sleep things which be terrible and horrible and he waxeth startled thereat: haply this vision thou hast beheld may be of the imbroglios of dreams so do thou commit the reins to Him who all overreigns and the best Worker is He of all that wisheth and willeth He.’ Now when Al-Mihrjan heard these words of the Sages and the Star-gazers he gifted and largessed them and he freed the captives in prison mewed and he clothed the widows and the poor and nude. But his heart remained in sore doubt concerning what he had heard from the Voice and he was thoughtful over that matter and bewildered and he knew not what to do; and on such wise sped those days. Now, however, returneth the tale to the Queen his Consort who, when her months had gone by, proved truly to be pregnant and her condition showed itself, so she sent to inform her husband thereof. He was gladdened and rejoiced in the good news and when the months of gestation were completed the labour-pains set in and she was delivered of a girl-child (praise be to Him who had created and had perfected what He had produced in this creation!), which was winsome of face and lovesome of form and fair fashioned of limbs, with cheeks rosaceous and eyne gracious and eyebrows continuous and perfect in symmetrical proportion. Now after the midwives delivered her from the womb and cut her navel-string and kohl’d her eyes, they sent for King Al-Mihrjan and informed him that his Queen had borne a maid- babe, but when the Eunuchs gave this message, his breast was narrowed and he was bewildered in his wits, and rising without stay or delay he went to his wife. Here they brought to him the new-born when he uncovered her face and, noting her piquancy and elegancy and beauty and brilliancy and size and symmetry, his vitals fluttered and he was seized with yearning sorrow for her fate; and he named her Al-Hayfá180 for her seemli
head. Then he gifted the midwife’” — And Shahrazad was surprised by the dawn of day and ceased to say her permitted say. Then quoth her sister Dunyazad, “How sweet is thy story, O sister mine and how enjoyable and delectable!” Quoth she, “And where is this compared with that I would relate to you on the coming night an the King suffer me to survive?” Now when it was the next night and that was

  The Six Hundred and Sixty-third Night,

  Dunyazad said to her, “Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be other than sleepy, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short the watching of this our latter night!” She replied, “With love and good will!” It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating, that King Al-Mihrjan largessed a robe of honour to the midwife and gifted her with a thousand gold pieces and went forth from beside his daughter. Then they committed her to wetnurses and drynurses and governesses who reared her with the fairest rearing, and after she had reached the age of four they brought to her divines who lessoned her in the art of writing and of making selections181 and presently she approved herself sharp of wits, clever, loquent of tongue, eloquent of speech, sweet spoken of phrase; and every day she increased in beauty and loveliness and stature and perfect grace. And when she reached the age of fourteen she was well read in science and she had perused the annals of the past and she had mastered astrology and geomancy and she wrote with caligraphic pen all the seven handwritings and she was mistress of metres and modes of poetry and still she grew in grace of speech. Now as her age reached her fourteenth year her sire the Sultan chose for her a palace and settled her therein and placed about her slave-girls, high-bosomed virgins numbering an hundred, and each and every famous for beauty and loveliness; and presently she selected of them a score who were all maidenhoods, illustrious for comeliness and seemliness. These she taught in verse and poetry and in the strangenesses of history and in striking instruments of mirth and merriment until they surpassed all the folk of their day; and she assiduously enjoined upon them the drinking of wine pure and new and boon-companionship with choice histories and strange tales and the rare events of the time. Such was the case with Al-Hayfa; but as regards her father, King Al-Mihrjan, as one night he was lying abed pondering what he had heard from the Voice, suddenly there addressed him a sound without a form and said, “O King of the Age,” whereat he was fully aroused by sore terror and his vitals fluttered and his wits were bewildered and he was perplexed as to his affair. So he took refuge with Allah from Satan the Stoned and repeated somewhat of the Koran and fenced himself about with certain of the holy names of Allah the Munificent; then he would have returned to his couch but was unable, even to place cheek on pillow. Presently sounded the Voice a second time, saying, “O King of the Age, O Mihrjan, verily shalt thou die by reason of her;” and forthwith improvised the following couplets,