The Hunger

by Melissa Haag

  “Feel the weight of my presence and know who I am, water-dweller.” River immediately fell to her knees. “I am outside of your food chain.”

  Fenris’s fingers dug into my hips as he turned me to face him.

  “Is it time for a swim, Eliana?” he asked. “Or a kiss?”

  I purred and ran a finger over his lips.

  “Both. Let’s get rid of these pesky clothes first.”

  He rested his forehead against mine.

  “Only after you feed some more.”

  Wrapping my arms around his neck, I fed deeply. Slowly, that dark thing inside of me settled enough that I realized what I’d done. Untangling myself from Fenris and ignoring his sigh, I looked at River.

  “We have no quarrel.” I lifted my head, noting the still water in the pools, and tried pushing my will out to all of them. “We have no quarrel,” I repeated.

  River snorted. “The hell we don’t, Eliana. I don’t know what kind of mind-trick spell the druids gave you, but you have five seconds to let me off my knees so I can eat the flesh off your face.”

  “I think you mean or I’ll eat the flesh off your face,’” Fenris corrected.

  River slowly shook her head, the hate showing in her eyes. “Nope. And when I’m done with her, I’m coming after you, Fenris.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  My reaction to River’s threat was swift and completely unplanned. The dark thing rose inside me, so smooth and subtle that I almost wasn’t aware of it. Once I noticed, though, I realized why it had responded. Instinct. Just like Mom had done at the Club, I’d embraced the piece of myself that would give me the tools and power I needed to protect someone I cared about.

  However, my instinct wasn’t only to protect. I wanted to dominate. She needed to learn that I was far superior to her in every way. Thankfully, I managed to shove that part of myself back into its quiet place rather than ordering River to wiggle like a fish on its belly before me.

  Instead of force, I went with finesse.

  “You need more love in your life,” I said, husky notes smoothing my tone. “So much more love. Why don’t you return to the pool and look for the love you’re missing?”

  River’s pupils dilated, and she rose to her feet. Unsteady and breathing hard, she dove into the water.

  “Let go of your hate and embrace each other.”

  My hunger rose along with that dark thing when the scent of lust exploded in the pool room. I opened my mouth, ready to inhale it all, but stopped at the last second. The hunger wanted me to consume it all. But while that dark thing inside of me reveled in what we’d created, it didn’t want what the mermaids offered. No, I didn’t want what they offered. Not when there was something far better nearby.

  Slowly, I turned to face Fenris.

  “Being apart hasn’t been easy on me,” he said, watching me with an intensity that made me want to do so many naughty things. “I’m not as strong as I should be right now, Eliana. Please don’t test me. I don’t want to fail you.”

  My hunger roared with need at those words. I wanted to consume every last drop of his lust then pull him into the water with the mermaids to help him make more.

  “Test you? Never. You’re the only one worthy of me.”

  “And will you be the only one worthy of me, Eliana? From now until forever?”

  The words penetrated through my haze, and I realized what he was asking.

  Gently cupping his face in my hands, I smoothed a thumb over his lips. They were too tempting not to touch in some form.

  “I didn’t mean to push,” I said. “I think I let myself get too hungry again. Would it be all right if I fed just a little?”

  He groaned and reeled me in closer so our fronts were touching.

  “It will always be all right. Take what you need, chipmunk.”

  Very aware of the frolicking mermaids in the nearby waters, I remained focused on Fenris’s lust alone and carefully fed. My fingers continued to caress his skin and brush over his bottom lip. It was a small compromise compared to what I wished I could do. I wanted to kiss him. Without interruption. Without complication. Just my lips against his lips. I wanted it so badly I felt myself leaning in.

  “Yes,” one of the mermaids hissed nearby. “Love me. Need me. Make me yours.”

  I abruptly stopped feeding.

  “Want to go somewhere else for a while?” he asked.

  “Yes, please.”

  On our way out, we almost collided with the druids.

  “You might not want to go in there for a while,” Fenris said. “They’re having a pool party.”

  Lauv glanced through the window, and whatever she saw amused her.

  “Your work, I assume?” she asked me.

  “It was an accident.”

  “A happy one, by the looks of things. Hopefully, they’ll keep at it for a while. We need to do some spell work before we meet Zayn later today.”

  “Megan’s Zayn?”

  Lauv nodded.

  “We’ve heard the rumors about him. Apparently, the Council has an insanely high bounty out for his capture.”

  “Please tell me you’re not thinking of turning him in.”

  “Are you crazy?” Meg demanded. “The man’s brilliant and a source of knowledge we would sell our families to obtain.”

  “We are definitely not going to turn him in. We want an alliance.”

  “As long as whatever you’re planning won’t screw up finding Ashlyn, I don’t care. She’s the priority.”

  “We know. Megan made that very clear.”

  They hurried into the pool room, and I glanced at Fenris.

  “I don’t feel reassured.”

  He chuckled and threaded his fingers through mine.

  Rather than go to the current session’s classroom, we went to the cafeteria and sat at one of the empty tables. The cooks gave us long looks, and I saw one pick up her phone.

  “You don’t smell even a little worried,” Fenris commented, studying me.

  “I don’t think they’ll do anything. Adira can’t touch you. Anwen won’t touch you. And unless your father has another gifted frost giant on speed-dial, there’s not much he can do to stop you from sitting here with me.”

  “I like this new version of you. What changed? Why do you think Adira can’t touch me?”

  “Did she portal you home after school yesterday like she said she would?”

  “No. She never showed. I went home with the girls to keep the peace. It paid off. That was the only reason my dad even considered going to your parents’ place for dinner last night. Honestly, I think he was hoping to talk your mom over to his side.”

  “That will never happen. She thinks you’re perfect for me. Too bad your dad is so set against it.”

  “He’ll come around.”

  I knew one way to ensure he would, but no matter how much I wanted Fenris permanently in my life, I would never purposely use my power to sway Raiden like that.

  “You asked what changed,” I said. “My understanding did. Feeding on you in my sleep wasn’t the only truth I’ve been hiding from. Do you remember how Mom ordered those people to protect me? Apparently, I’ve been doing that same thing without realizing it. Well, without realizing it some of the time. I think I was purposely ignoring the weirdness the rest of the time.”

  The way he was looking at me and not acting surprised tipped me off that this revelation was no secret to him.

  “You already knew I could do that, didn’t you?”

  He cocked a grin at me.

  “There’s very little about you I don’t know, Eliana. You may have been ignoring yourself, but I wasn’t.”

  I scowled and crossed my arms, which only made his grin widen.

  “No,” I said stubbornly. “You don’t get to know stuff about me before I do. That’s not right. What else don’t I know?”

  “When I lean in like this, it drives you crazy with need. You want to grab me by the shoulders and kiss the daylights out of me
, which I encourage, by the way. But you’ll resist that urge with every fiber of your being. Do you know why?”

  I couldn’t answer. My heart was pounding too hard.

  “You’re still afraid of what people will think of you if you do.”

  Nothing he said was a lie. The way he’d closed the distance between us and spoke so each exhaled word brushed against my cheek made me want to shiver. I did want to grab him by the shoulders and kiss him. And when I really thought about why I didn’t, I knew he was right. I was worried about the cooks reporting something to Adira, and Adira, despite my assurances to Fenris, actually doing something about it.

  “I don’t like that you see me so clearly.”

  His smile softened. “I know. Do you want to know more about yourself?”

  The way his gaze heated and his lust bloomed warned me the next thing wouldn’t be something I was comfortable discussing in the cafeteria.

  “I think one self-awareness revelation a day is enough.”

  “Chicken,” he whispered.

  “Chipmunk. Get it right.”

  He gave a laughing growl, plucked me off the bench, and sat me in his lap. Before I could figure out a dignified escape, he wrapped me in a hug. It should have been stifling but, instead, felt comforting and safe.

  Giving in, I slid my arms around his back and returned the hug.

  “Who are you, Eliana?” he asked softly.

  “Your mate.”

  He dropped his lips to my neck and nipped my skin. A flash of fire raced through me and ignited my sharp vision. I pulled away from him just enough to meet his gaze.

  “If you know my discomfort with public displays of affection, then why do you persist?”

  He grinned mischievously.

  “I like troub—”

  A session bell sounded, drowning out the rest of the word but punctuating his intent. Mere seconds later, the first trickle of students entered the large space.

  I scrambled wildly to get off Fenris’s lap and ignored his chuckle as I smoothed my hair from an appropriate distance beside him. With my attention divided between the first people who’d entered and what they might have noticed, and Fenris’s hand creeping closer to me on the bench seat, I almost missed Jenna’s entrance with Eugene.

  Happy for a diversion, I stood and waved the pair over.

  “Hey, Eliana,” Eugene said. “You look really pretty today.”

  “You’re not supposed to notice that,” Jenna scolded without rancor. “One, it’s dangerous. And two, you’re not supposed to be looking at anyone, right?”

  “Ah, yeah. Right. Sorry, Jenna.”

  She rolled her eyes and gestured for him to sit. Then she faced Fenris.

  “Aubrey had Laurel looking for you and brought Willow to the ground.”

  “But not you?” he asked, far from amused.

  “No. I told her to have fun with her little man hunt. She could kick my ass from here until Saturday, but it wouldn’t change a thing. I’m done playing her games; and if she somehow manages to snag you this weekend, I’m leaving to find my mate. And, I will not be back to turn belly up to her megalomaniac ego.”

  “Nice,” Eugene said.

  I kicked him lightly under the table.

  “You’re supposed to be pretending we’re not here, remember?”

  “Ignoring you guys and all your drama is way too boring. I’d rather be in the thick of it.”

  “He’s not going to make it more than three months,” Jenna said, plopping down beside him. “It was nice knowing you, Eugene.”

  He chuckled and unpacked his sandwiches. I gave the stack of six a weird look.

  “Want one, Fenris?” he asked.

  Fenris didn’t have to be asked twice. He snatched one off the stack and ate a quarter of it in one bite.

  “He’s been a lot hungrier since you started feeding more consistently,” Jenna said.

  Fenris must have kicked her because she twitched and scowled at him.

  “One dictator in my life is enough. Besides, Eliana would want to know that. She likes you too much to let you go hungry.” She abruptly switched topics and looked at me. “Do you mind if I invite Willow and Laurel to join us? Twenty minutes out from under Aubrey’s thumb will make them feel like they’ve reached Valhalla.”

  “I don’t mind at all. I like Laurel and Willow.”

  “Me too,” Eugene said. “In case anyone was wondering.”

  “Three weeks,” Jenna said, shaking her head as she texted.

  The pair joined our table a few minutes later. Both looked agitated and ready for a fight.

  “I can’t stand Aubrey,” Laurel said. “I think you’re making the right decision, Jenna. I’m going to tell my parents I want to go with you. I know I’ll end up at the bottom of the pack wherever I am, but at least it won’t be the bottom of her pack.”

  “Same,” Willow said, sitting beside me while Laurel took the spot on the other side of Eugene. Both girls reached for one of his sandwiches at the same time.

  “Don’t worry,” Eugene said, catching my look. “It’s why I made extra.”

  “Thanks for that, by the way,” Jenna said, bumping his shoulder with hers.

  “No problem. Like I said, your life drama is fun to watch. Oh, there she is.” He immediately looked down at his plate.

  I glanced at the door he’d been watching and saw Aubrey pause just inside of the cafeteria. Her gaze swept over the room teeming with people and somehow found mine. The slight narrowing of her eyes didn’t bode well for anyone at our table. Based on the sudden surge of fear and panic from Willow, she knew it, too.

  Reaching out, I placed my hand on hers and stole both negative emotions before Aubrey could smell them.

  “Well, isn’t this quaint. A picnic with the human again. Your dad is going to appreciate the effort you’re putting in to rebuild the relationship between the humans and the pack,” Aubrey said, sounding sincere.

  “The relationship you wrecked by eating a human, you mean?” Eugene asked without lifting his head.

  That boy had guts. And if he didn’t watch himself, Aubrey would be feasting on them.

  “Is there something you wanted, Aubrey?” I asked, redirecting her growing anger toward me. Willow’s hand twitched under mine, and I continued to steal her fear.

  “You know what I want, but to prove I’m not the monster I once was, I’ll leave you to your lunch. Enjoy him while you can, succubus. Once he scents his mate, he’ll be mine.” Her gaze shifted to the girls. “Fenris and I will run the pack a lot differently when Raiden steps down. Be ready to show your subservience come Saturday.”

  She turned and walked out of the room. Willow heaved a sigh and whispered her thanks as I released her.

  “Why don’t you two mate already and put us out of our misery?” Jenna asked. “The rabid bitch needs to go.”

  “I don’t know about Eliana,” Fenris said, “but I’ve had enough of people telling me what to do and when to do it. If we don’t put a stop to it, what are our kids going to face?”

  The whole kids thing knocked the wind out of me. There I was trying to grasp all the changes happening in such a short time while Fenris already had us in a house with a white-picket fence and a passel of kids. Of course, he would. Thanks to his nose and his instinct, he had no doubts.

  That thought made me pause.

  Everyone’s doubts about us would disappear if Fenris and I took that final step. When I’d said I didn’t want to go that far right away, I hadn’t realized how much it would complicate our lives. Things would be so much easier if I just gave in. Waiting was only making everyone, including me and Fenris, miserable.

  Yet, Fenris was right, too. Like him, I was tired of being pushed. I wanted our relationship to be on our terms, not someone else's.

  “Lately, I’m discovering I have a stubborn streak when it comes to listening to Adira,” I admitted. “I want to be able to make my own choices for a change.”

  Jenna’s understa
nding poured from her.

  “I get it. The few weeks Aubrey was gone were really nice.”

  The way Willow and Laurel quickly agreed had me recalling my conversation with Jenna. They’d all hated Aubrey, but they had never really been friends with each other. Maybe that could be different now.

  “We should do something fun tonight,” I said. “What about the Roost?”

  Willow’s expression lit up.

  “The Roost could be fun. And with Fenris there, Aubrey won’t be so bad.”

  I glanced at Fenris. “You never stop her from doing anything. Why would your presence make any difference?”

  “By not criticizing her, she thinks she has a chance and stays focused on me instead of turning on the other girls and making their lives worse,” Fenris said.

  All three girls nodded.

  “It’s all pack hierarchy,” Jenna said. “If Aubrey thought Fenris was actually considering any of us weaker females, she would continue to torment us to prove to Fenris how weak we are. The strongest always lead the pack. There’s never a strong alpha with a weak mate. It’s like nature just doesn’t let that happen.”

  Raiden’s words at dinner rang in my ears again. Was that what he meant when he said I wasn’t strong enough? Did he mean that I wasn’t strong enough to stand up to Aubrey?

  “So am I invited to the Roost?” Eugene asked, interrupting my thoughts. “I’m keeping my head down and staring at this extremely boring tuna fish sandwich, just like you wanted.”

  Jenna snorted. “You’re supposed to be ignoring us, not just staring at your food.”

  Despite her scolding words, I could feel her humor, which was how Eugene secured his invitation to the club. To keep him safe and give the girls some breathing room, I offered to drive everyone to the Roost.

  “She’s going to be so angry when she finds out,” Jenna said.

  “She’s always angry,” Willow said with a shrug.

  Some of that indifference faded when Willow got a text several minutes later.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked, feeling the shift in her mood.

  “Adira wants me in Principles of Public Integration. Apparently, Aubrey needs a babysitter.” She groaned and stood. “As soon as I get home tonight, I’m talking to my parents. One way or another, I’m done with this crap after Saturday.”