Blood and Cupcakes

by Taj McCoy El

  Margaret gagged, then wiped her mouth with the back of her hand as she drew an arrow. The bodies were slowing the rush of attackers, but not enough. More arrows, a doll fell, another one rose. Two dolls fell. Two more dolls rose, more dry heaves. More arrows, one more doll, and more dry heaves. The turmoil in her stomach reminding her too much of real life and her frail mortality. Hunching over with a quick heave after every cast of Resurrection Doll, she was reaching for an arrow at the same time. Unbeknownst to Mayah, Margaret was seeing all of the blood that was considered too graphic for Mayah’s innocent eyes. What was worse was that she was smelling the creatures who had a ripe and putrid smell like a dead, bloated frog stuck in a mucky puddle during a heatwave—and let’s just say that there was more than blood on the floor. Her tongue stuck out between her teeth like she was choking on it. She gasped and sputtered for air like a fish out of water while moaning and whining through her discomfort. Mayah thought she looked like she was chanting in some unknown, arcane language.

  She shot at as many imps as she could before a doll fell. Then she would cast and heave and repeat.

  Watching her Mayah thought, I don’t know how long she can hold out, While swinging Crushing Blows in the gaps between the dolls, Grax stabbed any imp flesh that got past the dolls. They’re going to break through.

  “Grax, I’m making the push! Mags! ...dolls on this line!” She noted a line across the aisle between the back wall and the cage, ninety degrees from the one they were now holding. “We’re gonna walk backwards and make them pay for every step.”

  The old dolls and imp corpses were littered across the floor in front of them, a blockade of bodies across the aisle. The few imps that had made it past the pile were beaten down as the trio moved to the left where fewer imps were in their way. The cages blocked the imps from running directly at them and gave them a little breathing space. The imps slipped on the wet floor and bodies of their fallen comrades, but they didn’t even seem to notice they were being led. As the volley of arrows up the main aisle decreased, the horde made a push. Imps spilled onto the back aisle, pushing each other out of the way. They were all just following the crowd and away from the intersection that Mayah wanted to go past. Some imps were being forced away from them by the clawed hands of their brethren. They climbed and clawed over each other with no compassion, so great was their desire for silver.

  Margaret was firing arrows into the thickest parts of the advancing danger behind them and resurrecting the fallen. She achieved Achilles Heel and saw blue pop up on her target. She was tired of seeing the blood fall from wounds in this game. So, she stopped noticing the blood that rained down and just aimed for the blue and fired, ignoring the rest. There were instantly more headshots that plagued the imps.

  Mayah stood in front of Margaret to meet the silver imps on their way to steal everything they had, including their lives. She was dealing critical hit multipliers literally left and right with Whack-A-Vole and Crushing Blow. She was taking some hits and losing silver, but nothing to be worried about in the HP department. Grax was working her right flank and keeping any imps off of Margaret. The imps tried to rush them, but arrows and dolls slowed their advance as they retreated towards the corner, bleeding their number the whole way.

  They cemented their escape in the corner as the imps didn’t seem to be that smart and just followed whatever imp was in front of it. They were all on the back wall when the trio started retreating towards the exit. They worked their way along the wall, fighting the enemy that hounded their steps like a mindless mob. Grax started just hobbling the imps and letting them fall to be trampled and trip up the others. Margaret was trying to finish everything with one shot. They slowed at each aisle to battle the imps and create more obstacles. Mayah was between Grax and Margaret tagging, any imp that got too close.

  With only 20 or so silver imps left, a roar mixed with sharp dog whistle tones echoed up from the man holes. The silver imps cowered from the sound. They stepped out of range, growling back at the trio, then dashed for the open sewer holes. The trio stood there and watched the grates slide back into place. The only imps left standing were Margaret’s four dolls.

  “Huh, that’s weird.” Grax whipped the ichor off of his blade.

  “It was all weird,” Margaret responded.

  “Fluff, you ever seen a mob run away unless they’re running to protect something?” He studied Mayah’s silent face. “I didn’t think so. Are you thinking what I’m thinking?

  “Wait, what are you thinking?” Margaret asked both of them apprehensively.

  “Time to go into the sewers,” Grax said with his cheeriest smile.

  “You’ve got to be kidding me.” Margaret moaned.

  Mayah put a hand on Margaret’s shoulder, “If we do this right, I’m sure there’ll be a great payoff. Let’s check the loot and regen before we proceed.”

  Everyone walked towards the imp bodies that remained. “It’s a good thing they weren’t faster.”

  “Yeah! No kidding,” Grax agreed.

  “The copper imps have coppers.”

  “And the silver imps have silvers and coppers.”

  “You guys expecting to find a gold imp?” Margaret asked.

  “Yup,” Grax smiled “Loot and treasure make the game worth it.”

  “Yes, it does.” Mayah was finally smiling again.

  Margaret was beginning to understand as well, now that the battle was over. The rush of satisfaction for surviving what seemed impossible odds made her think one thought. Thank God. I’m alive!

  …..

  They collected the loot and all but four corpses for their reluctant necromancer while they let their stats regen. Margaret didn’t look at all happy about climbing down into the sewer.

  “How’s everybody’s HP?” Mayah asked.

  “I’m almost full,” Grax said.

  “Even after the beating you took from those imps?”

  “Well, I beefed up my constitution and endurance. It really helped with my health points and my regen.”

  Margaret said, “I don’t really like it here.” She sniffed and rubbed her bow arm absently.

  “Look at it this way Mags, these dungeons have been deserted for a long time. It probably doesn’t even stink down there.”

  “You may be right. But I still don’t like it.”

  “Neither do I. But with the loot we get, we’ll be able to buy almost anything we need for a long time. Look how much these silver imps have given us already.”

  “You ladies ready to descend into the bowels of Majesta?” Grax asked in a creepy vampire voice.

  “Does he have to come with us?”

  “We could just tie him up and force him out of the party. He wouldn’t get any more loot or XP if we did that.”

  “Try and stop me!!” Grax went to the nearest manhole and lifted the grate. He proceeded to drop his torch down the hole. “I’m gonna go scout it out. Be right back.”

  “Hey, Mags, let me recharge my torch hammer? Don’t want to get caught in the dark, now do we?”

  Two minutes later Grax popped back up. “What are you ladies waiting for? Get your heinies down into the sewer. Time to get this gold!”

  Mayah, Margaret and four silver imps climbed into the dank, wet drain. They descended to the bottom using handholds they found carved into the stone. They touched down in a large, empty underground cistern. There were tunnels lining the walls on both sides for a far as she could see with Shadow Eye.

  Grax waved them forward. “C’mon ladies. Be quiet, I can hear them this way.” Quiet as a cat he crept through the scummy mud that covered the ground.

  “Can you tell how many there are?” Mayah inquired.

  “Not many more than we saw up top. A few sound different though.”

  “Gold imps?”

  “Maybe,” he shrugged and then made a crazy, deranged face at Margaret. “Could be something worse….”

  Fluff slapped him. “Stop it! This is her first dungeon. We need her c
alm,” she quietly hissed with force when she whispered.

  It’s a hissper. A hiss and a whisper…

  A tunnel on the left had a faint, reddish-orange glow that she could see reflected on the walls halfway down in a curved tunnel.

  “Over here.” Mayah padded towards the entrance.

  “That is definitely where the sound is coming from,” Grax concurred.

  “Okay, Margaret last bit of coaching. If Grax or I say to do something, do it. No questions. You’ll see what we mean after you do it. I’m trusting you to remember to keep calling dolls and switching your weapons as you see fit. But if one gets too close, don’t stop your dolls from doing what they’re doing. Use your sword, and either Grax or I will come help you. No boss stage is ever easy, but we’ll get by as long as we stick together. Besides, if you die and we win the dungeon, you’ll still get your share of the glory.” She looked into Margaret’s eyes. “This is all or nothing. You know why?”

  “No, why?”

  “Because we don’t want to come back here tomorrow and do this again. Capisce?” Mayah said in a mafioso voice.

  “Capisce,” Margaret smiled. She finally had the look of someone who was starting to have fun, and fun was what you played games for.

  Grax stalked down the hall followed by Mayah and Margaret with her bow strung. Her dolls were in the rear. He motioned for them to stop right behind him and held out five fingers and then another four, and pointed forward around the bend. His hands told Mayah to go left. He was going to take the right and told Margaret to send in her dolls and shoot the ones in the center first and then anything but them afterwards.

  Mayah saw Margaret’s confusion and went to party chat.

  Fluff: Tell us the plan in here so Mags doesn’t get it messed up.

  Grax facepawed.

  Margaret: Thanks Fluff.

  Fluff: No worries.

  Grax: We have nine silvers, three right in front of the opening and six further back. Fluff, you take the left, I’ll take the right and Mags you follow up the center. Shoot anything but us.

  Margaret: Got it.

  They ran into a small antechamber. The first three silver-blue creatures sat on their haunches side by side facing the tunnel. The other six sat on some steps leading up to wide double doors 15 yards off. Totally a dungeon.

  Mayah led the way, drawing all of the attention while Grax shot out unseen by the imps and Margaret sent in her dolls then stepped into the opening and let fly her arrows. With all three imps trying to go left after Mayah, Margaret’s arrow hit the center imp in the left hip. It fell, tripping up the one following it. The last standing imp was distracted by the scuffle. Mayah activated Crushing Blow and smashed the imp’s head to the stone floor. Grax jumped on the wounded and now rightmost imp with both blades piercing its spine. Another arrow thwapped into one of the imps that was approaching from the door. Mayah smashed the last of the first trio in the shoulder, dropping it cold. Margaret’s dolls intercepted the five other imps, causing a small scrum to form. Grax quickly dove in and went to work. There was only one imp left for Mayah to smash before it was finished. They looked around to make sure there were no more enemies in the antechamber.

  They approached the wide doors on the far side of the room. The doors were set about ten feet high in the wall. There were three tall steps that looked more like a boat would dock here than something for someone to walk up.

  They took the time to loot and store the bodies.

  “Everybody regened?” Mayah asked

  “Yeah,” Grax mumbled

  “Yes,” Margaret answered.

  “You ready?” she asked Grax

  “Of course.” Grax waved her off dismissively

  “What about you, Margaret?”

  “Well it’s either now or tomorrow and I’m gonna be really busy tomorrow.” A smile cracked on her lips.

  “That’s the spirit,” Mayah punched her in the shoulder. “Let’s do this.”

  They scrambled up to the doors and Mayah pushed them open slightly to get a look inside the room. The inside opened into a large, circular nave. At the far end opposite the door, three yellowish imps guarded the crossing to the apse. Behind them, something big lay curled up on a heap of rags.

  She stepped back towards Margaret and let Grax take a peek. “You’re really gonna have to work on that lightning arrow,” she whispered to Margaret.

  “What am I looking at?” Margaret whispered after she peered into the room.

  “Looks like a lot of work, is what you’re looking at.” Grax hissed.

  “Look, Mags, this doesn’t look scaled for a training village. This could be a major wipe.” Mayah’s eyes went to the door to make sure they remained undiscovered.

  “It looks like we’ve got 14 silver imps, 3 gold imps and I would love it if that that thing in the back is a platinum imp!” Grax asked. “Did anybody get an ID?”

  “The door is too far away for me to get it,” Mayah shook her head

  “Maybe we can pull them and take them out one by one? A train, like you were talking about,” Margaret suggested.

  “Maybe we can. If this is a training village, they’re not gonna make us fight all of them at once. ...I hope.”

  “We can get the first couple from the door. If it gets crazy, we can run. Hit them at the door and the mouth of the tunnel.” Grax took another peek inside the door, “The gold imps are level 14, 260HP. the silver imps only have 145.”

  “Okay, Mags, you stay by the door. We’ll feel the room out. Just keep shooting arrows and lightning and dolls. Lots of dolls.”

  Mayah activated Shield (F) and burst into the room. Summoning Acid (D) she hurled it into the nearest creature’s face. She swung Happiness in front of her in a wide arc and caught another on the shoulder. The silver imps screeched in rage and attacked. Grax entered the fray, spearing Acid Face in the belly and turning to the right to face the four silver imps over that way. Margaret's dolls lumbered into the fray and went toe-to-toe with the four headed for her. Mayah activated her dangerous duo, Whack-A-Vole and Crushing Blow, to slap the imp on her left with the cheek of the hammer for a critical hit. Then, pulling straight back, she impaled a charging imp in the face with the crowned spikes on the end of the handle.

  An arrow flew over her shoulder and into the mouth of her third opponent. It didn’t kill it, but the arrow was lodged in its throat and it rolled on the ground in agony. Mayah finished off the imp she had impaled. Grax had two imps left. Margaret was peppering the ones in front of her who were being held by her two remaining dolls. Arrows hit them all over until they fell.

  As she turned to shoot the imp writhing on the ground Mayah said, “Whoa!!!!!” and waved her arms wildly.

  “What?” Margaret asked lowering her bow.

  “Strategy lesson. If you’re in a room full of monsters and only some of them attack, that usually means the other ones will attack once you kill off the first ones. Right now, we breathe for a sec, regen, and then move forward. That’s why we stayed by the door. We weren’t close enough to draw aggro because they had guards. But when their guards are gone, it’s battle time!!!! We don’t shoot, go near, or kill the last guard until we’re ready. “

  “This is such a retro boss stage. So broken.” Grax was totally enjoying himself.

  “Yeah, no kidding. Okay, Mags, whenever you’re ready, send our little friend home.”

  “Lightning arrow?”

  “Yeah, yeah, lightning arrow.” Mayah nodded greedily in anticipation.

  “I’m just gonna step over here.” Grax walked to the far right of the door, afraid of what the outcome might be on this experiment.

  Margaret nocked her arrow, aimed at the silver imp and then changed her target to a gold imp. “Better not waste it.”

  “Good idea.” Mayah agreed

  Grax put his fingers in his ears and squinted his eyes. Margaret’s eyes collapsed down to slits as she concentrated on casting Shadow Lightning and holding it in her hand. The Shadow
Lightning condensed into a single point and grew to a softball sized, crackling, black sphere around Margaret’s fingertips. Mayah’s eyes were wide, her mouth in a fearsome grin of impending joy.

  As Margaret released the arrow, it grew a tail of black lightning. The black coils of crackling shadow raced up the shaft to surround the head until it was covered in a nimbus, of shadow. It struck the center gold imp full in its chest. Sinking in all the way to the fletchings, a crackle of shadow lightning burst from its mouth and eyes as it fell to the ground, dead.

  A seven-foot tall monster with 260 HP dead with one shot? Must've have been the lightning ignoring the armor and going straight for the vital organs. Maybe a Critical Hit multiplier. Mayah's arms shot out to the side, her fists clenched, her head rolled back. Like a warrior princess she trilled, “LALALALALALALALALALALALALALA…… yeeeeeee …….yeeeeeeeeee!!!!!”

  Her ears almost burst at the sound of the platinum imp’s roar of rage. The large creature’s chirps sounded like bass drops with the volume cranked up to 11. It stood up and beat its chest. It was at least 12 feet tall. A silvery necklace made of one piece of metal with a pale, pink crystal hung at its neck.

  Platinum Imp

  Name: Boss Tunbayk’d’beens

  Level 17

  834/857HP

  “I guess we’re doing this the hard way,” Mayah grunted as the gold imps surged forward. “I’ll get the platinum imp. You two finish off the golds.” She raised two fingers to her eyes and then pointed them at Margaret. “Dolls, Margaret, I don’t see four dolls.”

  She leapt forward with Shield (F). Grax cast Petal Storm on the imp on the right. Blinded, it made an easy target. She slammed the imp on the hip with Crushing Blow. It fell back on its butt, and she left it to Grax as she ran straight for the boss.