Pretty in Orange

by J B Trepagnier

  I grabbed Roman and kissed him. It was agony being naked in bed with all four of them and just talking, but I was the one that started this, so I had to finish it.

  “I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to, Roman.”

  Roman sighed and nuzzled my neck. “You smell so good.”

  Skoll tightened his arms around my waist and pulled me closer.

  “He’s right. You do.”

  “The shampoo Alozan makes smells wonderful on you,” Amduscias said.

  “She makes it?”

  “Oh, yes. She always has. She’s been using that recipe since long before they arrested me.”

  “What about the two of you? What are your favorite foods? I know Roman’s is blood.”

  “I’m partial to roast venison, killer.”

  “Roasted mutton is a top favorite,” Amduscias said. “Alozan served it during the feast our first night here.”

  “Oh, yes. Mutton is excellent too,” Skoll said.

  “Which one was the mutton?”

  “The one with the garlic.”

  “Oh, my god. That one was amazing. I could eat that again every night.”

  “As much as I’m detesting being attached to this cell phone and all the infernal calls I have to make, it has its perks. Alozan showed me an app where I can request anything for meals. I’m not sure if I’ll offend Brinok if I ask him to leave grease on food. He’s always taken pride in his cooking.”

  I laughed. Sometimes these men were like little aliens I had to teach about the world. I loved that about them.

  “It’s hard to mess up fries unless you cook them so they are super dry. I’ll bet your chef cooks those fancy fries they serve at places I couldn’t afford to eat at topside.”

  “What is a fry, anyway?” Roman asked.

  “It depends on where you are. In certain parts of the world, a fry is a kind of breakfast. What I’m referring to is called a French fry. It’s slices of potato that have been fried in oil. A cheeseburger is a meat patty served between two slices of bread with cheese and dressing. A milkshake is ice cream that has been beaten so you can drink it through a straw. Sure, it’s not healthy, and it’s not the gourmet food served here, but sometimes, I would beg on the streets for money until I had enough to buy that at McDonald’s instead of digging in the trash for food. It was like a treat for me.”

  Skoll let out a little growl and squeezed me.

  “That will never happen again, killer. I think I speak for all of us when I say we will spoil you rotten. You will only need to think about something, and we’ll get it for you. Roman and I can feel you now, and you and Fergus have a connection. I’m sure Amduscias has ways of sensing things.”

  Amduscias let out a little chuckle.

  “Demons have their abilities. For instance, Serafina was intent on having her wicked way with all of us when she came in here, but she changed her mind. She wants to talk now, but she also intends to get kinky later.”

  “Everyone should get kinky after a cheeseburger. It should be a law or something. After eating that slop in Scorchwood, I think I will gross you all out inhaling my dinner.”

  “I think a woman eating is sexy,” Skoll said.

  “I thought about killing the kitchen staff until they made you better food,” Roman said.

  “I would have disposed of the bodies and understood those kills,” Amduscias said. “It’s like they thought if they over salted it, it would somehow make it taste better. It was like eating salted mush.”

  “That was grade A mystery meat in the meatloaf, and that one slice of baloney they gave us for lunch was probably made from the same stuff they put in dog food,” I said.

  “Ha! We feed the Hellhounds real meat in Hell.”

  “Dog food topside is like this mammoth thing now. Some people cook for their dogs, and sometimes there are fights online about what to feed your pet. The same goes for cats. I’ve never really had a pet, so I don’t know what makes pet food good or bad, and if I see people start to fight about it, I usually just scroll.”

  Amduscias craned his head over Roman’s shoulder.

  “Would you like a pet? Hellhounds and Hellcats are quite lovely. We could go pick one out.”

  Oh, god. I was becoming domesticated in Hell. I was lying in bed discussing food, and now we were talking about pet adoption. Before I got arrested, which wasn’t that long ago, I was single and kept killing plants. I liked animals, but I never adopted one because I moved around so much and because of my Elemental Batwoman hobbies keeping me away from the house.

  “We have time to figure that out. We still have to find those elementals and stop my father. All of you have to get used to not being prisoners. We can discuss pet adoption once we’ve gotten past all of that.”

  Amduscias whipped out his phone again and acted like he was composing a text.

  “You’re getting hungry. Cheeseburgers, fries, and milkshakes are coming up.”

  I realized I would never be able to keep a secret from any of these men. I also realized I didn’t want to.

  Chapter 34

  Serafina

  T

  here would always be a special place in my heart for a McDonald’s value meal with a double cheeseburger and a strawberry milkshake. But Hell’s version? Oh, my God, I almost came in my pants when I bit into that cheeseburger. It was juicy and perfect, and there was no slice of plastic orange cheese on this burger. Sure, plastic orange cheese had a time and a place, but it wouldn’t have fit on this burger. This was some sort of creamy cheddar with just the right amount of sharpness.

  I had to ask because I’d never had fries like this before, and I wanted to sit in a bathtub of them they were that good. Alozan saw how much I was enjoying my meal and brought a small demon out.

  “This is Brinok. He’s been a chef here since Amduscias was a young demon. He was worried you wouldn’t be pleased since this was your favorite meal topside.”

  It worried him I wouldn’t like this? I couldn’t even talk to him because I was trying to chew a mouthful of fries. No one ever said I was a delicate princess when it came to stuffing my face. I took a huge sip of strawberry milkshake, which tasted like it was made from the best ice cream on the planet and made with real strawberries, to wash down my fries.

  “Everything you’ve cooked us so far has been amazing, but this was perfect. What did you do to the fries? I’ve never had them that good before.”

  Brinok was shy. He bowed his head and wouldn’t look me in the eyes.

  “I fried them in duck fat, then tossed them in truffle oil and parmesan, miss. Sir, I know this cuisine is not what I have cooked for you before. I hope it is to your liking.”

  Amduscias just gave him a gentle smile. “This was amazing, Brinok. I would love to try more modern recipes you’ve come up with while I was away. If you knew what they served me in Scorchwood, you would be so offended.”

  Brinok’s eyes lit up. “I’ve developed this wonderful recipe for white pizza.”

  “Excellent. I would love to have that served tomorrow.”

  Roman and Skoll could both see Brinok was nervous. I loved them even more when they buttered him up about how good the food was. Skoll could put away a lot more food than I could, and that was saying something.

  “Are there any more cheeseburgers?” he asked.

  Brinok’s eyes lit up that he was being asked for more food.

  “Does anyone else want more?”

  I did, and so did Amduscias. I would probably regret pigging out in the morning, but right now, I didn’t care. Right when Brinok disappeared, Amduscias’s cell phone rang again.

  “Can’t I even enjoy dinner?” he muttered, glaring at the phone. “It’s Bael again. Hello? Now? Why right this minute? I’ll let her know. We’ll get it done.”

  Amduscias hung up and rubbed his temples.

  “The shadow demon that has volunteered to break into the warden’s office wants to go now. Bael says if Fergus is going, he should leave in
five minutes. The kings of Hell want that prison out of their territory, and they want to find a way out of their contract with the Fae so they own all of Hell again. They aren’t fucking around and are sending the shadow demon in five minutes.”

  Fergus was ready and waiting, but he told me something I didn’t know.

  “Fae contracts are always ironclad, my Ena. The Fae are masters at making deals. People think it’s safe to make deals with the Fae because they can’t lie, but they are masters at twisting the truth so they are not lying, but they aren’t giving one the full picture either.”

  “I lie all the time,” I pointed out.

  “That’s part of why halflings weren’t allowed into the Fae realm when the portals were closed. The Fae may be masters at twisting the truth, but the human part of halflings gave them the ability to lie. It was just another reason for the Fae to look down on them. Bael may be able to get the prison closed, but there is probably some clause in the contract that will forever keep that piece of land in the hands of the Fae. I’d have to look at it.”

  “How are Scorchwood and everything my father is doing such a big secret if he can’t lie? Wouldn’t someone in the Fae realm have asked him something by now that he said something that tipped them off?”

  “The same way I could keep the secret of your parents from you for so long. You never asked the right question that I would have had to try to lie. A half-truth is not the same as a lie. Eiltan is probably giving out money and just enough information that no one knows exactly what he is doing.”

  “Yeah, but why hasn’t any Fae asked about all the money he’s using to pay people off? If his network is that big, it’s probably a lot of money.”

  “Hopefully, we will find those answers when we get the phone, my Ena. I must leave you now, but I’ll be back. Enjoy your burger and fries and drink more of that milkshake for me.”

  I always felt this emptiness when Fergus left, even if I knew he was coming right back. It was less now that I had Skoll, Roman, and Amduscias to fill the void. I didn’t feel empty at all, sitting here, enjoying my favorite meal with them.

  But I still wanted Fergus to hurry back. I would miss him, and I wanted to know what was on that phone.

  Chapter 35

  Fergus

  B

  ael must really want the Fae out of Hell if he was sending the shadow demon right this minute. I hoped Bael got to be a king of Hell because he was cunning and knew how to negotiate when making a contract with the Fae. Sure, Hell had something the Fae wanted, but the Fae had something Hell needed with demons being sick. I would have to look at the contract between the Fae and Hell for any loopholes. I just glanced at what was being exchanged when I found it.

  I had already given the safe location and combination to Serafina, who had gotten it to Bael. I hoped the shadow demon had everything they needed. I went to the warden’s office, and it was dark. Perfect for a shadow demon to get in and out by shadow. She was small and covered in tattoos. She looked like a deadly fighter if it came to that, but I had no intention of any demons dying to get to that phone.

  I disappeared out of the warden’s office to watch the door. Anyone who tried to enter this office would get burned alive. I checked, and cameras weren’t installed in this office. I could see wires, like the warden took Eiltan’s advice and was having them installed in this wing.

  The demon was quick. She got into the safe, downloaded the content of the phone, and installed the spyware in record time. As soon as I sensed the office was empty, I thought about returning to Hell, but I decided to do a little more spying. The last time I was here, Warden Skinner wasn’t upset that we killed all her guards. She was more pissed off she would have to replace them when people weren’t lining up to work here.

  Had she managed? When I checked, the guard’s wing was woefully understaffed. Where did Warden Skinner sleep? Did she keep something in her room that wasn’t in her office? I’d been through the computers and files in her office and found out a lot. Did she keep the really nasty stuff in her personal quarters?

  Warden Skinner gave off a nasty, corrupt vibe. I focused on it. It was late at the prison, and the only people awake were the people listening in on the hidden mics. Warden Skinner wasn’t in the prison. So, where was she? I pressed out further, seeking her out topside. She was near the Hellmouth, but she didn’t live here like the other guards. She had an apartment and commuted.

  I visited her apartment and learned a little more about Warden Skinner and why she was working for Eiltan Sunshadow. I didn’t even have to go through her things when I appeared in her apartment. The answer was money. She was living in a lavish, penthouse apartment suite and had anything she could ever want. She helped him for pure greed.

  She was sleeping next to a warlock on silk sheets. She wasn’t wearing a wedding ring. I had no idea if he was a long-time lover or just a plaything. Did he know what she was up to? I scanned the bedroom. Not a toy. There were photos of the two of them on travels all over the world.

  She had another laptop by the bed. I jumped into the hard drive and started scanning. It was mostly photos, but I found something exciting in her accounting program. Scorchwood wasn’t supposed to be this windowless, antiquated nightmare with no heat.

  King Ior was the majority shareholder in Scorchwood, but there was also a board of supernaturals. They had ordered several billion-dollar upgrades to the prison over the years. Indoor heating should have been installed, and money was being skimmed from the food budget. Ior and the rest of the board were giving her money for a much better menu. She was cooking the books and giving the money to Eiltan.

  Upgrades had been ordered for Scorchwood for years that hadn’t been carried out. A library was supposed to have been built. Computers and Wi-Fi were supposed to have been installed for the prisoners. A plan for a heated prison yard that had windows and was supposed to look as much like they were outside as possible had been commissioned and never built.

  I only knew this because I’d spent time in Scorchwood with my Ena. If Ior and the rest of the board had come down to see if any of their upgrades had been carried out, Warden Skinner would have been out of a job and probably ratted Eiltan out. As it was, Warden Skinner did a damned expert job, making it look like all the work had been done. The only thing she hadn’t done was provide photos. No one cared enough to ask for photographic proof the work was done.

  I guess they wanted to make sure no one was suffering needlessly down in Scorchwood, but they either didn’t care enough to check in on the work or Warden Skinner came highly recommended, and they trusted her.

  Since when did Ior trust Eiltan with these kinds of things? Eiltan was the one Skinner was sending the cooked books to, and I guess he was bringing them to Ior. The Ior I knew when I left wouldn’t have trusted Eiltan with choosing dinner, but it sounded like Eiltan had been his ambassador on Earth for a while now, and typical Eiltan was playing everyone for a fool.

  I needed to get back and find out if there were answers on her phone. I also needed to share what I found out from Skinner’s hard drive. Everyone needed to know Eiltan was acting alone, and the Fae tried to update Scorchwood so that the people there weren’t suffering.

  Chapter 36

  Amduscias

  T

  hat fucking cell phone. I’d enjoyed almost everything about being out of prison, especially sex with Roman and Serafina, and there was so much I had planned. I hadn’t forgotten him sucking my cock while she sucked his when he fed off me. I wanted more. I wanted so much more. I wanted to tie them both down and use all the fun things in my dungeon until they were screaming my name. I was picturing Skoll watching and getting off on it.

  Every time my cock got hard thinking I had time to whisk them all away for a romp, that fucking phone started ringing. I answered every time because I knew I had a duty to save those elementals and end this plot. If I could help close Scorchwood and prevent people from having to live like that, then I needed to do that. The people there
might have been criminals who committed horrible crimes, but there was such a thing as basic dignity if you would not kill them for it.

  My phone went off again right when we were enjoying a round of ale after dinner. Apparently, while we were in Scorchwood, Serafina promised Skoll she’d help him navigate the modern world of beer. Thankfully, that had changed little in the time I’d been in prison. We were just finishing up, and I thought I’d get to bring them upstairs. It was late, and I thought surely Bael would wait until morning before sending for me.

  As soon as I hung up, Serafina perked up.

  “Fergus has news too. Scorchwood was supposed to be a much better place than what we stayed in. Bael and the other kings need to know this.”

  Even if they made Scorchwood a paradise, Bael and the other kings would want it gone. It was a part of Hell they didn’t control, and they would hate that. The Fae had besmirched the land they were given, and it was time to kick them out of Hell. If they couldn’t control their prince, they had no place in our domain.

  I sighed and opened a portal to Bael’s. I wished this could all be over soon so that Serafina could be safe and everyone who hurt Roman and the other elementals would pay for it. I just wanted to enjoy finally being free of Scorchwood with the people I cared about, but I kept getting dragged back into it because of one misbehaving Fae prince who had no issues experimenting on his daughter.

  Bael was waiting in his office with a small shadow demon sitting in front of a laptop. I didn’t know her. She was relatively young. She was glued to the computer and didn’t even look up when we portalled in.

  “Solron is one of our best spies, and she’s an excellent hacker. Don’t let her size fool you. She could best even you in several forms of fighting.”

  “Like I would need some Fae spirit for protection,” Solron scoffed.

  Oh, that was totally the wrong thing to say. Fergus might be Serafina’s guardian, but she was also fiercely protective of him too, and she would start a fight with Solron if she continued to badmouth him. Serafina’s battles usually ended with someone getting burned alive. Solron wasn’t fire born and would be burned to a crisp.