The Essential Jagged Ivory (Jagged Ivory Boxed Set)

by Lashell Collins

  From there, he planted soft, wet kisses in a row down her belly. And as he worked his way down, he allowed his fingers to hook around the elastic waist of her pajama pants, pulling them down as he went. When he had her completely stripped he let his eyes wander over as he stood up. She was every bit as beautiful as he had let himself imagine all this time.

  Without a word he walked over to where his bag sat on a bench near the bathroom, and Fae watched as he quickly retrieved something from it. He walked back to the bed and his eyes locked on hers as he lowered his briefs and stepped out of them. And her breath caught in her throat as she remembered the first time she had seen him naked. She had thought he was impressive then, but now that it was standing at attention, his manhood looked like a monster and Fae felt herself salivating again.

  He slowly climbed onto the bed and lowered his body down onto hers as he stared into her eyes. She could feel the full weight of him on top of her, and she loved it. He kissed her deeply for a long moment before he looked into her eyes once more.

  “Last chance to say no, baby,” he whispered.

  She said nothing as she held his lustful gaze. Then she reached for his hand and took the strip of condoms from it. “Can I help you with these?” she whispered.

  Benji could feel the smile playing at his lips at her bold words, and he took the condoms from her, tearing one off and placing the others on the nightstand. Then he opened the foil packet and kissed her once more, wrapping his arms around her and rolling over onto his back, bringing her with him.

  He handed the open packet to her and looked at her with the sexiest expression, and Fae knew that his eyes were issuing her a small challenge. She smiled at him as she sat up, straddling him. And she removed the latex from its wrapper and tossed it aside as she took his imposing shaft in her hand and prepared to dress him. But the feel of him in her hands sparked something within her and she suddenly couldn't help herself. She moved, positioning herself over him, and took him into her mouth.

  She worked with expert precision, her tongue moving over him rhythmically as her lips hugged him tightly. And Benji felt himself floating as he watched her take an impressive amount of his shaft deeper and deeper. He could feel the head of his penis hitting the back of her throat and the sensations were mind-blowing. But he couldn't take it anymore. He wanted to be inside her. He reached down and stopped her, pulling himself from her mouth and taking the condom from her hands. He wasted no time rolling it on, and then he reached for her.

  Pulling her gently into his lap as he sat up, he whispered gruffly, “Your mouth feels so good. But that's not where I want to be right now.” He kissed her briefly once more, and then positioned himself at her opening. He entered her slowly, and Fae gasped loudly as she felt every blessed inch of him stretching her, filling her so completely. They sat that way for a moment, face to face as they savored their perfect, matchless connection. Their eyes searched one another's as Fae ran her fingertips over his face, through the whiskers on his jaw as she leaned in and kissed him. “You are so beautiful, Fae,” he whispered. “I've wanted to tell you that for so long.”

  “Benji,” she whispered.

  He started to move then, pumping slowly in and out of her as he held her to him, and Fae's body began to rock to his rhythm. And she tried not to be so vocal, but he felt so damn good inside her, and she had wanted him for so long. She simply couldn't help herself. His name became a slow, soft chant on her lips between moans and utterances of pleasure.

  “Oh … yes … Benji … ah … Benji … oh fuck … yes … yes … Benji!”

  Her encouragement spurred something inside him and Benji felt himself losing control as his tempo increased and his mind went blank. All he felt was Fae and the vice-like grip her body had on his cock. He was all sensation and instinct as his animalistic nature took over. Without breaking their intimate contact, he turned suddenly, rolling her onto her back as he continued to drill into her. Over and over, he rode her for the longest time as she writhed and moaned and called his name again and again. And when he felt her entire body beginning to tremble, he knew she was gone.

  Fae shattered beneath him, her body splintering into a million tiny pieces as wave after wave of explosions riddled her senses. He continued to bore into her like a jackhammer until he detonated deep inside her, calling her name as his body went rigid.

  He collapsed on top of her and felt her arms tighten around him as she held him close. And Benji had the strangest feeling of peace and contentment as he lay there in her arms and tried to catch his breath. This felt so right to him. So perfect and natural. Why had it taken them so long to get here? He raised up and looked uncertainly into her eyes for a moment, suddenly anxious about what they'd done. But when she smiled at him, all uncertainty went out the window. It felt right to her too, and he could see it. He returned her smile, and then leaned down to kiss her.

  That kiss quickly turned into a sweet make-out session and their bodies were soon entwined as they lost themselves in each other once more. Benji was discarding the spent condom and reaching for another when his cellphone rang, shattering the enchanted bubble they were adrift in. He frowned as he finally picked it up, seeing Buzzy's name on the caller ID.

  “Hello?” He knew that his voice probably sounded gruff and irritated at being interrupted.

  “Hey, man. Where are you?” Buz said. And Benji could hear the concern in his voice.

  “I'm in my room,” he fired back, feeling his frown growing deeper. “Where are you?”

  “I'm in the room down the hall,” Buz answered. “You know … the one we agreed the camera crew could set up in for the interview this morning?”

  “Aw, shit!” Benji muttered disgustedly, lowering his head as he mentally kicked himself. “I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I will be there in five minutes. Ten minutes, tops! I swear. I am so sorry!” He hung up abruptly and looked at Fae. “I've got to go. I completely forgot about that damn interview.”

  He sprang out of bed and began rushing around the room, pulling on his jeans from yesterday and digging a fresh shirt out of his bag. And his mouth never slowed down as he moved from the bedroom to the bathroom and back again. “Shit! We talked about it right before we came back to the room last night. How did I forget to set the alarm? I hate it that they're down there waiting for me! Like they used to have to do when I was wasted,” he said angrily as he turned on the water and began washing his face and brushing his teeth.

  Fae said nothing as she climbed out of bed and gathered up her t-shirt, slipping it on over her head. Then she found her pajama pants and pulled them on just as Benji came rushing out of the bathroom. He grabbed his shoes and sat on the edge of the bed as he pulled them on, and Fae nervously ran a hand through her hair as she watched him.

  He looked up at her as he tied his shoes. “I'm sorry, Fae. I hate that I have to run out like this,” he said quietly.

  “It's okay,” she replied with a small, nervous smile. “It's a good thing you have to leave. Otherwise I'd be late for load in, so … it's not a big deal.”

  “It is a big deal,” he said as he stood up and walked toward her. He reached out and caressed her face with his hand as he looked into her eyes for a moment. There was so much he wanted to say to her. So much that they needed to talk about. But he knew that neither one of them had the time right now. He had an interview to get to. And she had to get to work. It would likely be several hours before they would be able to talk about what had just happened between them. “I'm sorry. I have to go,” he whispered, still touching her face. She nodded silently at him. He leaned in and kissed her gently. Then he smiled at her as he turned and walked out the door.

  Fae stood watching after him for a long moment after he had gone. And she could feel the tears welling up as she opened the door and went back to her own room.

  Benji sprinted down the hall to the empty room at the end. And as he neared the open doorway he could see the guys all milling about as the camera crew completed their setup as
he rushed in.

  “I'm sorry, I'm sorry,” he said as he ran in and the guys all turned to look at him.

  “Benji, what the hell, man?” Otis asked him. “We talked last night about this interview starting promptly at 8 this morning.”

  “I know. I'm sorry, O,” he repeated apologetically. “I have no excuse, man!”

  “You sounded pretty distracted when I called just now,” Buzzy told him.

  Benji smirked at his choice of words. “Yeah. I guess you could say that,” he mumbled, running a hand over his face and scratching his well-trimmed beard as his mind replayed the morning's events in his head. And he tried not to smile as he thought about the feel of his hands on Fae's soft skin. But when he looked up he could see the guys watching him intently. Each of them held the same cautious, worried expression on their faces and Benji knew instantly what they were thinking. And he hated himself for it. He hated himself for making them wonder. But he knew that he couldn't blame them.

  “Okay, I know what you're thinking, but you're wrong,” he said as he looked each of them in the eye. “I'm clean. I just forgot about this interview this morning, and I didn't remember to set the alarm last night, that's all.”

  “The phone rang a while before you answered it, man,” Buz said, eyeing him closely.

  “Yeah, well, like you said, I was distracted,” Benji answered, looking him in the eye. He took a deep breath as he tried not to get upset with the interrogation. They had every right to question him. He made eye contact with Noah and held his gaze for a moment. “I promise I'm clean, man.”

  “I believe you, brother,” Noah smiled at him.

  “You do?”

  “Of course, I do,” he nodded. Then his sly smile grew bigger as he asked, “This distraction of yours this morning … it wouldn't happen to be a petite brunette with lots of tats and pretty blue eyes, would it?”

  Benji tried his best, but he couldn't keep the smile from coming. And he knew that he was blushing.

  “Ooh, the truth comes out,” Cory mumbled.

  “Shit,” Otis chimed in with a roll of his eyes. “After that song and dance you gave us yesterday afternoon about needing to be just friends?” Otis' voice was slightly shocked, and Benji said nothing as he watched him. What could he say? O had a very valid point. He looked at Benji with a shake of his head and a small laugh.

  “Man, I told you to put a stop to the sleepovers,” Noah said, looking him in the eye.

  “I know that,” Benji replied. “But it just happened.”

  “It just happened?” Noah repeated, studying him carefully.

  “Yes.”

  He glanced around at the others and then looked back at Benji with a serious expression. “Do you know what you're doing, man?” he asked quietly.

  “Noah, I'm fine. It was just sex, alright?”

  “It was not just sex, Benji. You care about this girl,” Noah told him. Then he sighed as he shook his head slightly. “I'm just thinking about you, man. Yesterday you said you were trying to keep things platonic for a while, so that you could focus on you.”

  “And I still am,” he insisted. They eyed each other silently for a moment. “I'm still focused on my recovery. That is still my priority. But what happened this morning happened. And I don't regret it!”

  “I don't want you to regret it, Benji,” Noah said quietly. “I just want you to be careful. And not just for you but for Fae too.”

  *****

  Back in her own room Fae showered and dressed quickly, and then dashed off to make it to the Garden on time. And she couldn't get what happened off of her mind. She thought about it all morning long as she worked. She had just made love with Benji, and it had been every bit as incredible as she imagined it would be. But now, she had no clue what to do next, or what any of it meant. Would he want to do it again or was this morning a fluke?

  For weeks now she had been reminding herself that she understood his reasons for the “strictly friends” stance he had taken with their relationship. And that was true; she did understand it. She knew that his sobriety was so important and she would never want to be the reason he relapsed. But he had run out awfully quickly this morning, so maybe he was feeling remorseful. Maybe this morning had been wrong in his eyes and he was grateful for the interruption. Maybe he thought what happened this morning was a mistake? Did she think it was a mistake? They had built such an amazing friendship over the past month, and she really didn't want to do anything that might jeopardize it. But at the same time, she knew that she was completely over the moon for him, despite her rules of not getting involved with someone who's using.

  But Benji's not using.

  That thought floated through her mind for about the millionth time since they had started hanging out. It was an internal conversation that seemed to run through her head constantly. Every time she found herself entertaining the idea that she and Benji could be more than friends, the fact that he was an addict would creep into her mind. And then the mental argument would begin.

  She was still preoccupied with it when the guys finally showed up for soundcheck, and her heart nearly fell into her stomach when she turned around and saw Benji walking toward her.

  “Hi,” he said quietly, smiling at her as he stared into her eyes.

  “Hi,” she answered, finding it hard to meet his gaze. “Um … which bass would you like for soundcheck?”

  He looked at her curiously for a moment, and Fae suddenly wanted to crawl under the floor and hide.

  Benji wasn't sure what to make of her sudden awkwardness, and it made him instantly uneasy. They needed to talk. But he knew this wasn't the time to do it. “Five string,” he answered softly.

  She nodded and quickly turned to retrieve the bass from the crate. When she handed it to him, he subtly placed his hand over hers and held it there for a brief moment as he took the instrument from her. The action caused her to look up into his eyes, and he tried to will her to hold the eye contact for longer than a split second. But she blushed and looked away.

  Benji was troubled all through soundcheck. He couldn't keep his mind off of her, and he wondered almost frantically what was going through her mind. Why was she acting so uncomfortable with him all of a sudden? Did she regret what they had done? Was she sorry that she had let him make love to her?

  Soundcheck seemed to last forever. It was the longest hour Benji could remember in a long time. It was also the first time since the Crank incident over a month ago that he found himself craving a hit of something. Anything, to take the edge off these confusing feelings. And he hated to admit that Noah was right once again. It wasn't just sex, because he cared about her. And suddenly he knew that he needed to be extremely careful going forward. His careless actions this morning had just changed everything, and Benji wasn't at all certain that he hadn't fucked everything up.

  When soundcheck finally ended and he handed his bass off to Fae, he hung around for a moment while the other guys headed down to the Green Room. And he could easily see that she was nervous as hell.

  “Look, Fae … I know this is not the time or the place but … we need to talk,” he said quietly as he watched her.

  She glanced around anxiously, looking at her fellow backline techs. They already believed she and Benji were sleeping together since her upgrade in accommodations, so she wasn't sure why she cared if they were listening now. “I know,” agreed.

  Reading her anxiety and following the trajectory of her eyes, he glanced around at the rest of the backline crew. He kept his voice low as he looked back at her and continued. “I know that neither of us really has the time right now, but … I want you to know that I don't regret what happened this morning.” He paused for a moment before he softly added, “And I hope you don't either.”

  Fae felt relief wash over her and she finally looked up and met his gaze. “No, I don't,” she whispered. “But you ran out so fast …”

  “That was not by choice, Fae,” he insisted quietly as he searched her eyes. “I wo
uld never have left you if I hadn't been late for that interview. But I couldn't make them wait for me anymore; I've put them through enough of that shit as it is!”

  “I know. I get it. I just … I have a fragile ego,” she said softly, feeling the embarrassed flush of her cheeks. “I suppose I should have warned you about that.”

  He smiled at her then, feeling reassured by her words. And when she shyly returned his smile, Benji felt almost comforted. “I really want to touch your face right now,” he whispered as he took a step closer to her, looking into her eyes as he covertly ran a finger over her the back of her hand. “I want to kiss you. But I don't want the other backline guys to get jealous. You know, if I kiss you then I've got to kiss them,” he quietly joked with a playful roll of his eyes. And he smiled at Fae's explosion of giggles.

  “Well, I wouldn't want you to be accused of playing favorites or anything,” she softly laughed.

  “Okay,” he said softly as he smiled at her. “I should get going.” He found it hard to leave though, and he stood for a moment looking into her eyes. Then he shook his head slightly. “I can't wait to get you alone so we can talk,” he muttered.

  Fae bit her lip as she smiled at him. He was so loveable she couldn't stand it. He smiled at her as he turned and walked away. And Fae silently let out the breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding. She sighed heavily and looked at the time. She needed to grab a bite to eat. Especially since she had skipped breakfast this morning because they were running late. Not that she believed for one minute that she'd be able to eat a single bite. But she had a long day ahead of her and she knew that she needed to eat something or she would pass out by the time Jagged Ivory took the stage.

  She made her way to the designated lunch area, and as she sat at a table in a secluded corner eating a pasta salad and apple juice, she suddenly felt the need to talk to a friendly ear. Quickly picking up her phone, she dialed home and waited for someone to answer.