VII.
BURLESQUE OF MODERN DRAMA.
We now pass to a department of burlesque writing larger in extent andgreater in variety than any other--that in which the finger of ridiculehas been pointed at poetic and melodramatic plays (other than those ofShakespeare). This department is far-reaching in the matter of time.It goes back, for subject, so far as Lee's high-sounding "Alexanderthe Great" (better known, perhaps, as "The Rival Queens"), which,first produced in 1678, was travestied by Dibdin, in "Alexander theGreat in Little," a "grand tragi-comic operatic burlesque spectacle,"originally seen at the Strand in 1837, with Hammond as Alexander andMrs. Stirling as Roxana. Seven years later there was performed at theSurrey a burlesque, by Montagu Corri, of Lillo's famous tragedy "GeorgeBarnwell" (1730), here called "Georgy Barnwell"--a title which H. J.Byron altered to "George De Barnwell" when in 1862 he travestied theold play at the Adelphi.
Home's "Douglas", which was given to the public in 1756, appears tohave escaped stage satire until 1837, when it was taken in hand byWilliam Leman Rede. The Adelphi was the scene of the production,and the performers included "O." Smith as Glenalvon, J. Reeve asNorval, and Mrs. Stirling as Lady Randolph. The piece does not supplyvery exhilarating reading. The ultra-familiar soliloquy, "My name isNorval," is here put into lyric form, and comes out as follows:--
My name is Norval, sir; upon the Grampian Hills My father feeds his flocks, beside the streams and rills. He often said to me, "Don't roam about at nights." But I had heard of sprees, of larks, and rows, and fights. Tol de rol lol tol lol, tol de rol lol lol lay. Tol de rol lol tol lol--list to what I say.
The moon rose up one night, as moons will often do, And there came from left and right a ragged ruffian crew; They broke into our house, they swigged our beer and ale, They stole our flocks and herds, and caught our pig by the tail. Tol, lol, etc.
The shepherds fled, the curs! but I was not to be chizzled, So with a chosen few after the fellows we mizzled; We fought and larrupped 'em all! indeed, it isn't a flam, I stole the togs of the chief, and, blow me, here I am! Tol lol, etc.
We have already seen that, in his "Quadrupeds of Quedlinburgh," Colmanjunior extracted some fun out of scenes in "The Stranger," "Pizarro,"and "Timour the Tartar." The first of these plays was made the subjectof more elaborate satire in 1868, when Mr. Robert Reece wrote for theNew Queen's Theatre his burlesque called "The Stranger, Stranger thanEver!" This, with Miss Santley as Peter, Mr. Lionel Brough as theStranger, and Miss Henrietta Hodson as Mrs. Haller, had many points ofattraction. In this _reductio ad absurdum_ the lady's chief complaintis that her husband first neglected her and then deserted her, takingaway the children. Moreover, "he taught the infants all the comicsongs," and so, "instead of gloating over Peter Parley, the boydeclared himself as Champagne Charley." In despair the deserted one setto work and took in washing:--
You'll ask, "why washing?"--give your fancy scope: In that profession while there's life there's _soap_! Was I to live?--of course came this suggestion! "_Tub_ be or not _tub_ be?" that _was_ the question. So with a will I turned me to my work, Carried a _blue bag_ like a lawyer's clerk; Yet still I grieved--the trade's of woe prolific, I couldn't sleep, for all this _soap-horrific_; Hard was my lot, for I could plainly see My source of living must end _sud_-denly; And in her downward course, say, what could stop her Whose sole subsistence was a single _copper_?
As usual with Mr. Reece, the puns are excellent. Tobias says of thestranger that
Each evening you may see him sitting so, Under that _linden when the sun was low_; On close inspection, too, you'll also see His noble _eye, sir, rolling rapidly_.
Then the Stranger says to Peter:--
Mrs. Haller's gifts you showed, As hint that _I_ should help you _Haller-mode_.
To the Countess he remarks:--
Madam, this river-water's _eau-de-riverous_!
And of his children he says:--
They're fighting through their alphabet. Oh, lor! I quit them in their _A-B-C-nian war_!
Of his wife:--
When first I married thee (then somewhat shady), Oh, Adelaide! I thought I _had a lady_!
But, in truth, there is no end to these _jeux-de-mots_.
"Pizarro," which nowadays has quite gone out of the theatricalrepertory, was dealt with from the comic point of view by LeicesterBuckingham, whose "Pizarro, or the Leotard of Peru," was seen at theStrand in 1862, with Johnny Clarke as the hero, and Miss Swanborough,Miss Charlotte Saunders, Miss Bufton, Miss Fanny Josephs, Miss FannyHughes, and Rogers, in other parts. Of the "literature" of this piecethe following is a very fair example: it is supposed to be spoken byRolla:--
Tho' to use vulgar phrases I've no wish, I may say, here's a pretty kettle of fish! But then the world's all fishy--poets fail To prove that life is not a tearful _wale_! Though fancy's prospect oft in-_witing_ glows, Experience tends to _mull-it_, goodness knows; Grave moralists aver that from our birth We are all _herring_ mortals here on earth. Dancers stick to their _eels_, and live well by 'em; And most folk can appreciate "_carpe_ diem." Some statesmen--theirs is no uncommon case-- Will give their _soul_ in barter for a _place_, And call, to mend a diplomatic mess, The conger-eel's fond mate--a _conger-ess_. Nay, folks strive even in a college cloister Over a rival's head to get a _hoister_.
"The Wood-Demon," by "Monk" Lewis, played originally in 1811, suggestedto Albert Smith and Charles Kenny a travestie, of the same name, whichthey brought out at the Lyceum in 1847. "Timour the Tartar," anotherof Lewis's dramas, received equally satiric treatment at the hands ofJohn Oxenford and Shirley Brooks, whose work made its appearance atthe Olympic in 1860. In the last-named year Messrs. Francis Talfourdand H. J. Byron founded on Pocock's "Miller and his Men" (1813) a"mealy-drama," similarly entitled, which was played at the Strand.
Jerrold's "Black-ey'd Susan," first performed in 1822, waited till 1866for the travestie by Mr. Burnand, to which I have already adverted.This "Latest Edition of Black-eyed Susan, or the Little Bill that wasTaken Up,"[42] was made specially gay by a wealth of song and dance;but it had other merits. Here, for instance, is an amusing soliloquy byDame Hatley:--
[42] See p. 41.
It's very hard, and nothing can be harder Than for three weeks to have an empty larder; I'm in the leaf of life that's sere and yellar, Requiring little luxuries in the cellar. There are no _cellars_ such as I requires, But there soon will be when there are some _buyers_. Destiny's finger to the "work"-us points, A stern voice whispers, "Time is out of joints." I used to live by washing; now, no doubt, As I can't get it, I must live without. The turncock turned the water off--dear me! I showed no quarter--and no more did he. Thus, with the richer laundress I can't cope, Being at present badly off for soap. My son, the comfort of the aged widdy, Is still a sailor, not yet made a middy, But sailing far away; it may be _my_ son Is setting somewhere out by the horizon. He's cruising in the offing, far away, Would he were here, I very _offing_ say.
Here also is the Wolsey-ish speech made by Captain Crosstree, after hehas revealed himself as "alive and kicking," at the close:--
Farewell, a long farewell to all imbibing! This is the state of man as I'm describing: To-day he takes a glass because he's dry, To-morrow, one to wet the other eye; The third day takes one extra, just to shed A tear--he feels it gets into his head: The fourth day takes two extra ones, and feels 'Stead of his head it's got into his heels; And in the morning, with perhaps two suits on, He finds himself--in bed, but with two boots on; Then after that he's nowhere; and that's how He falls as I did--which I won't do now.[43]
[43] Another burlesque on the same subject, called "Ups and Downs of Deal, and Black-eyed Susan," was seen at the Marylebone in 1867, with Miss Augusta Thomson as Captain Crosstree
.
Five years after the production of Jerrold's play, the London stage wassurfeited for a time with adaptations from the French, all bearing uponthe evils of the gaming-table. These bore such titles as "The Gambler'sFate," "Thirty Years of a Gambler's Life," and so on, and were broughtout at Drury Lane, the Surrey (by Elliston), and the Adelphi (by Terryand Yates). They did not last, however; and "The Elbow-Shakers, orThirty Years of a Rattler's Life," in which Fox Cooper made fun ofthem, was scarcely needed to effect their overthrow. Reeve and Yateswere the two Elbow-Shakers, but the piece had little intrinsic value.
In 1867, at the Haymarket, Mr. Gilbert Arthur a'Beckett brought outa travestie of Planche's "Brigand" (1829), under the title of "TheBrigand, or New Lines to an Old Ban-Ditty." In this, Massaroni, thehero, was represented by Compton as a poltroon, objecting very much tothe dictation of Marie Grazia as portrayed by Ione Burke. Young Mr.Kendal also had a part in this production. Nor had we yet done with theold school of melodrama. Yet another specimen thereof was destined tocome under the lash of the parodist--namely, the piece called "My Polland my Partner Joe," written by J. T. Haines, first seen at the Surreyin 1838, and interpreted by T. P. Cooke as Harry Halyard, R. Honner asJoe Tiller, and Miss Honner as Poll (Mary Maybud). The "happy thought"of burlesquing this typical piece came to Mr. Burnand, who, in histravestie named after the original, made, at the St. James's in 1871,a success second only to that of "Black-ey'd Susan." It was in thisburlesque that Mrs. John Wood (as Mary) had so notable a triumph withher song, "His Heart was true to Poll," which she still sings sometimesin public. Miss Emma Chambers was the Harry in this piece, and Mr.Lionel Brough the Black Brandon, with Harry Cox, Gaston Murray, andMiss Sallie Turner in other parts.
Now comes the turn of the poetic drama, as represented in and by theworks of Lord Byron, Sergeant Talfourd, the first Lord Lytton, and Mr.W. S. Gilbert. The first of Lord Byron's plays to be burlesqued was"Manfred," which fell to the lot of Gilbert Abbott a'Beckett in 1834.In the "burlesque ballet opera," called "Man-Fred," which thus issuedfrom A'Beckett's pen, Man-Fred figured as a master-sweep, very muchperturbed and disturbed by the Act in reference to chimney-sweepingwhich had just been passed, and which, he plaintively declares, haskilled the trade:--
That horrible new act has marr'd his pleasure; It really was a very _sweeping_ measure.
His lady-love, Ann Starkie, is equally unfortunate in herbusiness--that of apple-seller. As she remarks:--
"The trade is at a stand," the people whine: If it be at a _stand_, 'tis not at mine. In vain down Fleet Street with my wares I go; Though Fleet they call the street, its trade is slow.
In the course of the piece Ann appears disguised as Mme. Grisi, andsome badinage is directed at the "stars" of the Italian Opera.
A'Beckett further undertook, along with Mark Lemon, a skit uponanother of the Byronic dramas--"Sardanapalus"--which they reproducedas "Sardanapalus, or the 'Fast' King of Assyria." The Adelphi was thetheatre of operations; 1853 was the year; and while Miss Woolgar wasSardanapalus, Paul Bedford was Arbaces, Keeley was Salymenia (mother ofthe Queen), Miss Maskell was Beleses, and Miss Mary Keeley was Altada.Arbaces is here shown as impervious to the charm of melody:--
Such music to my ears is a mere hum; Of minims let me have the minimum.
Salymenia says to the King's favourite:--
Your conduct, madam, 's not at all correct: If you're a Myrrha, why don't you reflect?
Of such are the quips and the quiddities with which the piece abounds.
In 1858 came, from the workshop of H. J. Byron, the first travestie ofhis "noble kinsman's" play, "Mazeppa." This, produced at the Olympic,had Robson for its hero, with other parts in the hands of Horace Wigan,Mr. Lewis Ball, Miss Wyndham, Miss Bromley, and Mrs. W. S. Emden. Ofits punning dialogue, which throughout is in the genuine H. J. Byronicmanner, the following is a fair example. Olinska is conversing with herfather, the Castellan:--
_Oli._ You hate romance,--are one of its deriders. (_Very romantically_) Give me a summer-house with _lots_ of spiders, A poet-husband too, with rolling eyes, In a fine phrenzy----
_Cas._ Poets I despise! And in his phrenzy that you mention, daughter, His _friends see_ often nought but gin and water.
_Oli._ In our sweet bower of bliss what could we fear?
_Cas._ Why, Quarter Day, which comes four times a year! And although landlords show each quarter day, They show _no quarter_ when you do not pay, Your poet-spouse grows thin, and daily racks his Poor brains to pay the butcher or the taxes.
_Oli._ A verse would pay the tax-man all we owed.
_Cas_ (_aside_). I think he'd be _averse_, though, to that mode. To see with _my_ eyes, if I could but make her!
_Oli._ With a few _flowery_ lines we'd pay the baker. (_With enthusiasm_) Tradesmen with _gentle_ feelings we'd pay so, sir; A comic song would satisfy the _grosser_. A poet never yet was a great eater, We'd pay the butcher with a little _meat-a_.
The subject of "Mazeppa" was afterwards treated by Mr. Burnand in aburlesque brought out at the Gaiety in 1885.
Of Sergeant Talfourd's dramatic works the only one, apparently, thathas been travestied is "Ion," which had to submit to the ridicule ofFox Cooper in 1836. In that year Cooper's perversion was played both atthe Garrick Theatre and at the Queen's, in the first case with Conquestas the hero, in the latter with a lady in the _role_--an arrangementquite defensible, inasmuch as, in the original play, the name-part hadbeen played (at the Haymarket) by Ellen Tree.
The pseudo-Elizabethanisms of Sheridan Knowles naturally attracted theattention of the comic playwrights. The opportunities were, indeed,only too tempting; and so I have to record the production of burlesquesbased upon five plays--"The Wife," "Virginius," "Alfred the Great,""William Tell," and "The Hunchback." The first named has for its fulltitle "The Wife: a Tale of Mantua." The "burlesque burletta," by JosephGraves (Strand, 1837), is called "The Wife: a Tale of a Mantua Maker."Mariana (first played by Ellen Tree) here becomes Mary Ann Phipps,the said mantua-maker; Floribel is Flora, a servant-of-all-work.Leonardo and Ferrardo Gonzaga figure as Marmaduke Jago, landlord ofthe Green Man, and Zachariah Jago, usurping that dignity; Count Floriois Floor'em (a police-sergeant), Julian St. Pierre is Jack Peters--andso forth. The travestie is fairly close, but the wit and humour arenot of brilliant quality. Even less to be commended is "Virginius theRum 'Un," perpetrated by William Rogers, the comedian, and performedat Sadler's Wells in the same year as Graves's effort. This is buta tedious assault upon "Virginius." The scene is laid in Islington,and Virginius is a butcher. Appius Claudius, here called Sappyis, isa sergeant of police. Dentatus is "Tentaties"; Icilius is "Isilyus."Claudius claims Virginia as his apprentice, and Virginius stabs herwith a skewer; the instrument, however, sticks only in her stay-bone,and so no harm is done.
"Virginius" had very much more justice done to it when LeicesterBuckingham made it the basis of a burlesque at the St. James's in1859. Then Charles Young was the Virginius, Mrs. Frank Matthews theVirginia, and Miss Lydia Thompson a "Mysterious Stranger," introduced,apparently, only for the sake of a _pas seul_. In this piece the punsare very plentiful, if not always good. Thus, Virginia says:--
Oh, deary me! each day I'm growing thinner: Nurse says, because I never eat my dinner; But that's not it;--in my heart there's a pain Which makes me sigh, and sigh, and all in vain! I've lost the plump round waist I used to prize, And grow thin, spite of my long-_wasted_ sighs. I love--oh! such a nice young man!--but, oh! Does he love me?--that's what I want to know. When we met at a party, I could see That he was just the party to suit me; And to the words I spoke, on his arm leaning, Love lent a sigh to give a _si-lent_ meaning. But he said nothing soft--that's what I cry for; I sigh for one whose heart I can't de_ci-pher_.
Virginius, like so many other burlesque characters, delivers himself ofa reminiscence of "To be or not to be," and at the
close it is foundthat Virginius has not really killed his daughter, because she "pads."
"Alfred the Great," one of Knowles' historical plays, suggestedportions of the burlesque called "Alfred the Great, or the MinstrelKing," which Robert B. Brough wrote for the Olympic in 1859. In this,Robson was the King, Miss Herbert his aide-de-camp, and F. Vining hiscommander-in-chief, with other parts by Horace Wigan and Miss Hughes.Knowles's "William Tell" (1825), or the story embodied in it hasbeen the basis of half a dozen travesties. First came Mr. Burnand's"William Tell," at Drury Lane, in 1856; next, Leicester Buckingham's,at the Strand, in 1857; next, Talfourd's "Tell! and the Strike of theCantons, or the Pair, the Meddler, and the Apple!" at the Strand,in 1859-60; next, again, Byron's "William Tell with a Vengeance! orthe Pet, the Parrot, and the Pippin," at the Strand, in 1867; a fewdays later, A. J. O'Neill's "William Tell," at Sadler's Wells; and,lastly--so far--Mr. Reece's "William Tell told Over Again," at theGaiety, in 1876. "The Hunchback" has been "guyed" less often than mighthave been expected, considering its popularity. Mr. Burnand brought outat the Olympic, in 1879, "The Hunchback Back Again," and this comicversion of the hackneyed old play is not likely to be superseded.
The first Lord Lytton's verse-plays--bristling as they do with fustianand bombast--have naturally been frequently travestied. Note the numberof occasions on which "The Lady of Lyons" has fallen a prey to theirreverent. Altogether there have been six notable burlesques of thisdrama. H. J. Byron wrote two, the first of which--"The Latest Editionof the Lady of Lyons"--was produced at the Strand in 1858. This, in thefollowing year, was freshened up and re-presented to the public as "TheVery Latest Edition" of the popular drama.
In 1878, at the Gaiety, came Mr. Herman Merivale's "vaudeville," "TheLady of Lyons Married and Settled," which is not only quite the best ofthe travesties on this topic, but one of the cleverest ever written. Itsparkles with good things from beginning to end. Claude, it seems, has"taken to philosophy, and says we are all descended from monkeys." Itis not surprising, therefore, to find him singing a long song in praiseof the Darwinian theory:--
Power to thine elbow, thou newest of sciences, All the old landmarks are ripe for decay; Wars are but shadows, and so are alliances, Darwin the Great is the man of the day.
All other 'ologies want an apology; Bread's a mistake--Science offers a stone; Nothing is true but Anthropobiology-- Darwin the Great understands it alone.
Mighty the great evolutionist teacher is, Licking Morphology clean into shape; Lord! what an ape the professor or preacher is, Ever to doubt his descent from an ape.
Man's an Anthropoid--he cannot help that, you know-- First evoluted from Pongos of old; He's but a branch of the _cat-arrhine_ cat, you know-- Monkey, I mean--that's an ape with a cold.
* * * * *
Fast dying out are man's later Appearances, Cataclysmitic Geologies gone; Now of Creation completed the clearance is, Darwin alone you must anchor upon.
Primitive Life-Organisms were chemical, "Busting" spontaneous under the sea; Purely subaqeous, panaquademical, Was the original Crystal of Me.
I'm the Apostle of mighty Darwinity, Stands for Divinity--sound much the same-- Apo-theistico-Pan-Asininity Only can doubt whence the lot of us came.
Down on your knees, Superstition and Flunkeydom! Won't you accept such plain doctrines instead? What is so simple as primitive Monkeydom, Born in the sea with a cold in its head?
This has some claim to rank with the ditties on the same subject byLord Neaves and Mortimer Collins. But Claude has also gone in forsomething less innocent than Darwinianism. He is flirting with Babette,a pretty laundry-maid, the beloved of Gaspar. Of her, Gaspar sings asfollows, in a clever parody of "Sally in our Alley":--
To catch a lover on the hip, There's none like fair Babet-te! You'd love to kiss her rosy lip, But, ah! she'll never let 'ee! Yet shall she wash my Sunday suit, Tho' she my suit refuses, For, oh! she washes far the best Of all the blanchissooses!
For washing-day all round the year, She ever sticks to one day; She takes my linen Friday night, And brings it back o' Monday! When I bestow the lordly franc, 'Tis sweet to hear her "Thankee"-- She mends my hooks and darns my eyes, And marks my pocky-hanky!
She calls the wandering button home, However hard I cuss it; She's good at collar and at cuff, And truly great at gusset! To catch a lover on the hip, There's none like fair Babet-te! You'd love to kiss her rosy lip, But, ah! she'll never let 'ee!
In the course of the piece there is a good deal of direct parody ofLytton's style, both in prose and verse. For example, Claude says atone point to Babette:--
Come with me to my mother's lonely cot! I have preserved it ever in memory of mine early youth; and, believe me, that the prize of virtue never, beneath my father's honest roof, even villains dared to mar! Now, maiden, now, I think thou wilt believe me! Wilt come?
_Babette._ I wilt!
Again:--
In the sweet suburb of Richemont or Tedainton, on the banks of the broad Garonne, one of those expensive spots where, during the summer months, the river is at the bottom of the lawn--during the winter, the lawn at the bottom of the river--but where it is damp-pleasant all the year round; there will we babble to the murmuring stream, and the babbling stream shall murmur back to us, and softly whisper----
_Dowager Morier_ (_coming down_). Hold on![44]
[44] Mr. Merivale was fortunate in the cast of his production (played at the Gaiety in 1878). Mr. Edward Terry was the Claude, Miss Farren the Pauline, Mr. Royce the "Beauseong," Mrs. Leigh the Dowager Morier, and Miss Amalia the Babette, other parts being taken by Messrs. Elton, Maclean, Squire, and Fawcett.
After Mr. Merivale's piece came one on the same subject by Mr. W.Younge (1879); another by Mr. Clifton (Lyne), played in the countryin 1882; and yet another, by Mr. Reece (also played in the country)in 1884. This last was entitled "The Lady of Lyons Married and ClaudeUnsettled."
Ten years after the first burlesque of "The Lady of Lyons" appearedthe first burlesque of Lord Lytton's "Rightful Heir." This was "TheFrightful Hair" of Mr. Burnand, seen at the Haymarket in 1868-9. In1868 also, publicity was given to "The Right-Fall Heir" of Mr. H. T.Arden.
In the autumn of 1873 Mr. Irving revived at the Lyceum Lord Lytton's"Richelieu," and the play was speedily followed at the Olympic by the"Richelieu Redressed" of Mr. Reece. This is remarkable, to begin with,as being written throughout in blank verse--an agreeable departurefrom the time-honoured couplet. The general travestie is close, andthere is a certain amount of direct parody, as where Richelieu is madeto say that
In the great Lexicon of Politics There's no such word as Truth!
In the "curse of Rome" scene, Richelieu draws around himself "the awfulcircle of the Daily Press!" Fun, too, is made of the well-known exitof Baradas at the words "All in despite of my lord Cardinal," and alsoof the various ways in which actors are wont to pronounce the simpleword "Julie." The piece has a strong political flavour throughout,in compliment, no doubt, to the general election, which was then inprospect. Richelieu thus soliloquises:--
A general election! At the word Upspring a thousand hopes--ten thousand fears! From the great Limbo of past sessions rise The ghost of certain Legislative Acts To taunt me with my shifting policy: Amidst them, gaunt and frowning--Income-tax Broods o'er my heart--I cannot take it off! While lesser demons, labelled--Sugar, Tea, Malt, Hops, and kindred duties--hover round And gibber, "Where's your popularity?" For this reward I have to bear the brunt Of deputations--tedious committees, The dull assaults of country members, and Whitebait as large as herrings. Ah, the fish At ministerial banquets should be _Plaice_!
Of Richelieu's genius for suspicion the Duke of Orleans and his partythus discourse:--
>
_Duke._ Breathe not the words "'Tis wet." He'll twist that phrase Into reflections on th' existing _reign_, Or with some public measure discontent Because you chanced to say, "It isn't _fair_!"
_Baradas._ There's truth, sir, in your jest; 'tis hard to say What is a safe discussion nowadays!
_La Foix._ Even the King falls under his distrust!
_Malesherbes._ He treats him like a child in leading-strings!
_Duke._ Ay! at the royal breakfast Richelieu stands, And cracks each egg--to see no treason's hatched.
_All_ (_laughing_). Well said!
_Duke._ His caution o'er the dinner broods, And in each _pate_ sees a dangerous _spy_.
_Baradas._ Escorts the King to bed, and, lest his charge Should dream of _marriage_, secretly removes The _Royal matches_, as suggestive!
It was characteristic of Mr. W. S. Gilbert that he should himself setthe example of burlesquing his own work. I have already made referenceto "The Happy Land," the travestie of his "Wicked World," which he andMr. Gilbert Arthur a'Beckett prepared for the Court Theatre in 1873.It was in this piece that the personal appearance of three prominentliving statesmen was closely imitated by certain of the performers,with the result of bringing down upon the culprits the veto of HisHigh-and-Mightiness the Lord Chamberlain. In 1876 two of Mr. Gilbert'splays were burlesqued--"Broken Hearts" and "Dan'l Druce"; the formerunder the name of "Cracked Heads," the latter under that of "Dan'lTra-Duced"; both being brought out at the same theatre--the Strand,and both being the work of the same author--Mr. Arthur Clements, who,however, had in "Cracked Heads" the assistance of Mr. Frederick Hay."Dan'l Druce" was not a particularly good subject; but "Broken Heads,"with its occasionally overstrained sentiment, was fairly open to politeridicule. In the original, the Lady Vavir feigns love for a sun-dial,while the Lady Hilda expends much sentiment upon a streamlet. In"Cracked Heads" the Lady Vapid bestows her affections upon a clock, andthe Lady Tilda hers upon a pump. Says the latter to the former:--
Why do you love the clock, good sister? tell.
_Vapid._ The earth goes round; the moon, with silvery smile; The p'lice cerulean who the cooks beguile; The turncock, too, precursor of the spring; The German band, and all that sort of thing. Most things go round, in fact; and who shall mock? The clock goes round: that's why I love the clock.
In this genial little piece, presented at the Strand in 1876, Mr.Edward Terry was the monster, here called Monsta; Miss Lottie Venne andMiss Angelina Claude were the ladies Tilda and Vapid, and Mr. Harry Coxwas the Prince Florian, here called Dorian. It will be remembered, bythe way, that it has been the fate of one of Mr. Gilbert's comic operasto be parodied--surely a case of gilding refined gold! The opera was"Ruddigore," which was chaffed, more or less effectively, in the little_piece d'occasion_ called "Ruddy George, or Robin Redbreast," broughtout at Toole's Theatre in 1887.
The melodrama of the last half-century has received due attention atthe hands of the stage satirists. Buckstone's "Green Bushes," forexample, had its comic counterpart in H. J. Byron's "Grin Bushes,"performed at the Strand in 1864. It was Byron, too, who burlesquedBoucicault's "Colleen Bawn," under the title of "Little Eily O'Connor"(Drury Lane, 1861). The story of Rip Van Winkle, made so popular inEngland by Mr. Jefferson, has been handled in the spirit of travestieboth by Mr. Reece (at the Folly in 1876) and by Mr. H. Savile Clarke(in 1880). "The Lights o' London" suggested "The De-lights of London"(1882), which we owed to the co-operation of Messrs. Mackay, Lennard,and Gordon. After "The Silver King" came "Silver Guilt," a cleverpiece by Mr. Warham St. Leger, in which, at the Strand in 1883, MissLaura Linden imitated Miss Eastlake to admiration. In like manner,after "Claudian" came the diverting "Paw Claw-dian" of Mr. Burnand,which, at Toole's in 1884, gave Miss Marie Linden the opportunity ofemulating (as Almi-i-da) her sister's success. In this piece Mr. Toole,as Claudian, and E. D. Ward, as Coal-Holey Clement, were particularlyamusing. "Chatterton," another of Mr. Wilson Barrett's triumphs, haslately reappeared, disguised as "Shatter'd Un"--the author in thisinstance being Mr. A. Chevalier. "In the Ranks" naturally led to theproduction of "Out of the Ranks" (by Mr. Reece, Strand, 1884); and"Called Back" was found especially provocative of ridicule, no fewerthan three travesties being written--Mr. Herman Merivale's "CalledThere and Back" (Gaiety, 1884), Mr. Yardley's "The Scalded Back"(Novelty, 1884), and Mr. Chevalier's "Called Back again" (Plymouth,1885).
In 1888 Mrs. Bernard Beere was playing at the Opera Comique in"Ariane," a rather full-blooded drama by Mrs. Campbell Praed. This wasat once burlesqued at the Strand by Mr. Burnand, whose "Airey Annie"(as rendered by Mr. Edouin, Miss Atherton, and Miss Ayrtoun) provedto be a very mirth-provoking product. The heroine, Airey Annie thusaccounted for her sobriquet:--
Untaught, untidy, hair all out of curl, A gutter child, a true Bohemian girl, Like Nan, in "Good for Nothing," so I played, And up and down the airey steps I strayed, Until the little boys about began To call me by the name of "Airey Anne."
Among miscellaneous satires upon the conventional stage products may benamed Byron's "Rosebud of Stinging-Nettle Farm" (Crystal Palace, 1862),Mr. Reece's "Brown and the Brahmins" (Globe, 1869), and Mr. Matthison's"More than Ever" (Gaiety and Court, 1882)--the last-named being writtenin ridicule of the modern Surrey-side "blood-curdler."
So much for the travestie of English melodrama. When we come to dealwith the burlesque of melodrama derived from the French, a large fieldopens out before us. Going back to 1850, we find that Hugo's "NotreDame," as dramatised in England, has suggested to Albert Smith a comicpiece called "Esmeralda," brought out at the Adelphi. The subject isnext taken up by H. J. Byron, whose "Esmeralda or the 'Sensation' Goat"belongs to the Strand and 1861. Then Fanny Josephs was the Esmeralda,Marie Wilton the Gringoire, Eleanor Bufton the Phoebus, Clarke theQuasimodo, and Rogers the Claude Frollo. Gringoire was made tointroduce himself in this punning fashion:--
I am a comic, tragic, epic poet. I'll knock you off a satire or ode Venice on, Aye, or write any song like Alfred T_enny-song_. Something from my last new extravaganza-- Come now (_to Clopin_), a trifling stanza shall I stand, sir? Let me in some way merit your esteem: _Ode to a creditor_--a first-rate theme.
_Clop._ Thankee, I'd rather not; the fact is, you're----
_Gring._ But a poor author--that is, _rauther poor_. The baker, a most villainous character, Has stopped supplies.... The milk purveyor to my chalk cried "Whoa," Because I did a trifling _milk-bill owe_. My tailor, who for years this youth hath made for, Closed his account, _account o' clothes_ not paid for. The gasman, looking on me as a cheater, Finished my rhyme by cutting off my _metre_.
Esmeralda, who is a dancer, expresses her "delight in all thingssaltatory":--
Some people like dear wine, give me cheap _hops_, Where fountains spout and where the weasel pops; My love for trifling _trips_ I can't conceal: E'en when I read I always _skip_ a deal; I prefer _columbine_ before all plants, And, at the play, give me a piece by _Dance_.
Phoebus, declaring his love for Esmeralda, makes use of a punsomewhat above the Byronic average:--
Alonzo Cora loved with all his might, And Petrarch was forlorn for Laura quite: You're worth to me, dear maid, a score o' Coras; Yes, to this bachelor, a _batch o' Lauras_.
In 1879, at the Gaiety, Byron returned to the topic, and produced thepiece which he called "Pretty Esmeralda." At the same theatre, in 1887,one saw the same subject treated in the "Miss Esmeralda" of Messrs. F.Leslie and H. Mills--a piece in which Miss Marion Hood, as the heroine,played prettily to the Frollo of Mr. E. J. Lonnen, and in which thelate George Stone laid the foundation of his too brief success.
Boucicault's version of "Les Freres Corses" was produced in London byCharles Kean in 1852, and was quickly followed by a travestie. This wasfurnished by Gilbert Abbott a'Beckett and Mark Lemon at the Haymarket(April, 1852), unde
r the title of "O Gemini! or the Brothers ofCo(u)rse." Those who did not witness the production can neverthelessconceive how droll Buckstone must have been as the Brothers, and howwell he was supported by Bland, also in a dual _role_--that of Meynardand Montgiron (or Montegridiron, as he was called)--and by Mrs. L.S. Buckingham as Chateau Renaud. The burlesque was not wholly of thepunning sort; it relied chiefly upon its travestie of the incidentsin the original play. Fabien was made to give (to the sound of "lowmusic") the following account of the extraordinary sympathy existingbetween himself and his brother:--
Listen! this hour, five hundred years ago-- It may be more or less a second or so-- In the Dei Franchi family there died, I think it was upon the female side, The very greatest of our great-great-grandmothers, Leaving ('tis often thus) two orphan brothers. They took an oath, and signed it, as I think, In blood--a horrid substitute for ink. They swore if either was in any mess, If either's landlord put in a distress, Or of their goods came to effect a clearance, They'd to each other enter an appearance.
_Maynard._ But you have never seen a ghost--
_Fabien._ That's true; But I shall see one soon, by all that's blue: For 't is a fact not easily explained, The ghost has in the family remained, We've tried all means--still he has stalked about, And nobody could ever pay him out. We let apartments, sir; but deuce a bit Will the ghost take our notices to quit.
Later, just before Louis' apparition, Fabien says:--
I feel a pain about my ears and nose, As if the latter had repeated blows. I'm sure my brother's in a fearful row-- I shouldn't wonder if they're at it now. I'll write to him. (_Writes_) "Dear brother, how's your eye? Yours ever, Fabien. Send me a reply." I'm sure he's subjected to fierce attacks, For as I seal my note I feel the _whacks_!
H. J. Byron, who travestied nearly everything, of course did not letthe "Corsican Brothers" escape him, and his "Corsican 'Bothers'" dulyfigured at the Globe in 1869. Messrs. Burnand and H. P. Stephensfollowed, at the Gaiety in 1880, with "The Corsican Brothers & Co.,"and in 1881 (at the Royalty) Mr. G. R. Sims made his _debut_ as awriter of burlesque with "The Of Course-Akin-Brothers, Babes in theWood." In this he began the action with Fabien and Louis as the Babesand Chateau Renaud as the Wicked Uncle, introducing a certain RosiePosie, who is maid to Mme. dei Franchi and sweetheart of AlfredMeynard. At the end of the first scene Father Time came on, and summedup the situation in a song:--
Kind friends in front, you here behold a figure allegorical: Excuse me if at times I pause and for my paregoric call. I want to tell you all about this story Anglo-Corsican, And do the best in spite of cough and voice that's rather hoarse I can. Old Father Time I am, you guess; 't is I who rule the universe, And cause the changes which I sing in this the poet's punny verse! So while the scene is changing, here I sing this song preparative, To help you, as a chorus should, to understand the narrative. Ha, ha, ha! Ho, ho, ho! As chorus to this tragedy, to act my painful doom it is. In spite of cough, sciatica, lumbago, and the rheumatiz.
The little boys who in the wood the robins saved from perishing Are two young men for one young girl a hopeless passion cherishing. In Corsica with his mamma young Fabien dei Franchi is; The other one in Paris lives, and growing rather cranky is.
G. R. SIMS.]
Sweet Rosie Posie followed them. The ma of these phenomena As lady-help accepted her for foiling the abomina-Ble plans the wicked uncle laid the brothers to assassinate, And Rosie still in Corsica contrives all hearts to fascinate.
To Paris went the uncle, too, to let coiffeurs their talent try, And now he is an aged buck and famous for his gallantry. He's bought a wig, and paints his face--three times a day he'll carmine it, He asks young wives to opera balls, and swears there's little harm in it.
In the second act Meynard brings a friend with him to Corsica, and thuspresents him to Mme. dei Franchi:--
A friend of mine who's come this trip with me, The customs of the country for to see. The customs, when he landed, landed him-- He's _cust 'em_ rather, I can tell you, mim!
_Friend._ 'Tain't pleasant when a chap on pleasure's bent To find the call of duty cent. per cent.
_Mad._ You're welcome, sir, although our customs seize you: A triple welcome, and I hope the _trip'll_ please you.
Previous to the first entry of Louis' ghost, Fabien says:--
I feel so strange, I know poor Loo is seedy; I dreamt I saw his ghost all pale and bleedy. I'll write him. Where's the ink? Lor, how I shudder! (_Looks about for ink_) I'm on the ink-quest now--poor absent brudder. The ink!--the quill! Ah! this, I think, will do. (_Sits and writes_) "Louis, old cock, how wags the world with you?" (_Music--he shudders_) I feel as if a ghost were at my elbow handy. This _goes to_ prove I want a drop of brandy.
Of the other puns in the piece the following are perhaps fairspecimens. At the _bal masque_, Louis, meeting Emilie de Lesparre,says:--
Why are you here?
_Emilie._ I came because I'm asked (_puts on mask_).
_Louis._ This is no place for you to cut a shine; 'Tain't _womanly_.
_Emilie._ I know it's masky-line.
Again:--
_Louis._ My dagger awaits you--for your blood I faint!
_Renaud._ Your dagger awaits--you'_d aggerawate_ a saint.
In the final tableau, Chateau Renaud is advised to take some brandy;but he asks instead for "a go of gin--I want the _gin-go_ spirit."
The latest of the burlesques on this subject was supplied--also forthe Royalty--by Mr. Cecil Raleigh, whose "New Corsican Brothers"played in 1889, had more than one whimsical feature to recommend it.One of the brothers (Mr. Arthur Roberts) was supposed to be an Englishlinen-draper, who, whenever anything was happening to the otherbrother, had a wild desire to measure out tape--and so on. The dialoguewas in prose.
"Belphegor," the generic name bestowed upon the numerous adaptations of"Paillasse," gave birth to at least one travestie of importance--thatby Leicester Buckingham, which saw the light at the Strand in 1856,the year in which Charles Dillon played in one of the adaptations (atthe Lyceum). "The Duke's Motto," in which Fechter "starred" at thesame theatre, was the origin of H. J. Byron's "The Motto: I am 'AllThere'"--a piece seen at the Strand in 1863, with Miss Maria Simpson asthe Duke Gonzaque, George Honey as Lagardere, and Ada Swanborough andFanny Josephs as Blanche and Pepita. Among much which is mere punning,though deter enough for that commodity, I find this little bit ofsocial satire:--
Receipt to make a party:--First of all, Procure some rooms, and mind to have 'em small;
Select a good warm night, so draughts may chill 'em; Ask twice as many as it takes to fill 'em; For though the half you ask may not attend, The half that comes is sure to bring a friend; Select a strong pianist, and a gent Who through the cornet gives his feelings vent; Give them some biscuits, and some nice Marsala; Make a refreshment-room of the front parlour; Garnish with waltzes, flirtings, polking, ballads, Tongue, fowl, and sandwiches, limp lobster salads, Smiles, shaking hands, smirks, simpers, and what not; Throw in the greengrocer, and serve up hot.
It is to H. J. Byron that we owe the burlesque of "Robert Macaire,"which, with Fanny Josephs and J. Clarke as Macaire and Strop,brightened the boards of the Globe Theatre in 1870. The drama of whichRuy Blas is the central figure has been twice travestied among us--oncein 1873 by Mr. Reece ("Ruy Blas Righted," at the Vaudeville), and morerecently (in 1889) by Messrs. F. Leslie and H. Clark ("Ruy Blas, or theBlase Roue," at the Gaiety). "Diplomacy," adapted from "Dora," appealedto Mr. Burnand's sense of the ridiculous, and the result was "Dora andDiplunacy" (Strand, 1878), in which the weak spots of the original weredivertingly laid bare. In the same year, Mr. Burnand burlesqued, at theRoyalty, his own adaptation, "Proof, or a Celebrated Case," under
thetitle of "Over-Proof, or What was Found in a Celebrated Case." To 1879belong two clever travesties--"Another Drink," by Messrs. Savile Clarkeand Clifton (Lyne), suggested by "Drink," and brought out at the Folly;and "Under-Proof," Mr. Edward Rose's _reductio ad absurdum_ of "Proof."In the latter piece, besides many well-constructed puns, there are manypleasant turns of humour, as when Pierre satirises the conventionalstage pronunciation of his name:--
In my native land, as you're aware, My Christian name's pronounced like this--Pi-erre, But here I'm made a nobleman of France, For everybody calls me _Peer_ Lorance.
Of the Anglo-French melodrama of recent years, Mr. Burnand has been thefrequent and successful satirist. He capped "Fedora" with "Stage-Dora"(Toole's, 1883), "Theodora" with "The O'Dora" (same theatre, 1885), and"La Tosca" with "Tra la la Tosca" (Royalty, 1890). This last containedsome of the happiest of its author's efforts, in the way both ofingenious punning and effective rhyming. Here, for example, is a songput into the mouth of the Baron Scarpia, the "villain" both of the playand of the travestie:--
I am the bad Baron Scarpia! You know it at once, and how sharp y'are. Than a harpy I am much harpier-- How harpy I must be! There never was blackguard or scamp To me could hold candle or lamp. I'm equal to twenty-five cargoes Of Richards, Macbeths, and Iagos! For nobody ever so far goes As Scarpia--meaning me.
I'm chief of the Italiani Peelerini Me-tropoli-tani! Around me they wheedle and carney-- They'd all curry favour, you see. And, buzzing about me like flies, Are myrmidons, creatures, and spies.
They're none of them mere lardy-dardy, But cunning, unprincipled, hardy, And come from Scotlandini Yardi, La Forza Constabular_ee_.
During the present year, the interest gradually excited by successiveperformances of plays by Henrik Ibsen has culminated in the productionof the inevitable burlesques. More than one clever travestie of Ibsenhas been printed--_e.g._, those by Mr. J. P. Hurst and Mr. WiltonJones; but the first to be performed was that entitled "Ibsen'sGhost, or Toole up to Date," which is from the witty pen of Mr. J.M. Barrie. This starts as a sort of sequel to "Hedda Gabler," whichit mainly satirises; but there are allusions also to "Ghosts" andto "A Doll's House," with some general sarcasm at the expense ofIbsen's peculiarities. The dialogue is in prose, with a concludingvocal quartett; the writer's touch is as light as it is true; and thecomposition, as a whole, is thoroughly exhilarating. The three-actpiece, "The Gifted Lady," in which Mr. Robert Buchanan sought toridicule not only Ibsen but other "emancipating" agencies of the time,was, unfortunately, not so successful as Mr. Barrie's slighter andbrighter work. It abounded in excellent epigram, but lacked genialityand humour. In "Ibsen's Ghost" Mr. Toole and Miss Eliza Johnstonerenewed old successes, while Miss Irene Vanbrugh gave signs of aptitudefor burlesque. In "The Gifted Lady" Miss Fanny Brough, Miss CicelyRichards, Mr. W. H. Vernon, and Mr. Harry Paulton showed all theirusual skill, but, unfortunately, to no purpose.
A Book of Burlesque: Sketches of English Stage Travestie and Parody Page 9
