Playing Catch-Up

by Zoey Lennox

  Alexis surged forwards and attempted to grab Ramie’s arm. “No. Of course not. You’ve got to believe me. This has all been one big terrible mistake.”

  Ramie swatted away her hand. “You’re right. This relationship has been a mistake. Consider yourself dumped.”

  Chapter 24

  “Jesus. What’s the matter?” Lauren pulled a sobbing Alexis into her house, slamming the front door shut in her wake.

  Alexis couldn’t speak.

  “Todd!” Lauren called out.

  Todd’s head appeared around the living room door. “What’s happened?”

  “I’ve ruined everything,” Alexis sobbed. Her body shuddered under the weight of her emotions and her knees buckled out from beneath her.

  “Come on, Lex. Let’s get you sat down.” Todd’s calm voice washed over her as strong arms lifted her up and carried her to the sofa. “Are you okay? Are you hurt?”

  Of course she wasn’t okay. She’d just had her heart ripped out. A fresh flood of tears engulfed her.

  “Go and pour us some drinks, babe,” Lauren said in a low tone. “I think we’re all going to need one.”

  Todd’s clomping footsteps sounded on the wooden floor, and then Lauren was pulling Alexis into a tight hug. “Tell me what happened, sweetie. Did you have a fight?”

  Alexis’s sobs subsided, and she let out a hiccup. “Ramie hates me.”

  “That doesn’t sound like the Ramie we all know and love.”

  “I know, but she found out about all the lies I’ve been telling and completely flipped out.”

  “Lies?” A deep line wedged itself between Lauren’s brows. “Oh, Lex. I thought you’d come clean about all that.”

  If only she’d summoned up the courage, maybe she could have avoided this nightmare.

  “I wanted to tell her, I really did, but it was impossible. I was in way too deep to come clean without looking like a compulsive liar. And I’ve been so happy lately. So happy. I didn’t want to risk losing everything.”

  Lauren sighed. “What did she say?”

  “That she hates liars and I’m sick for hoodwinking the kids at the LGBTQ centre.”

  “Oh God. What did you say to them?”

  Alexis pulled back from Lauren’s arms. Damn. Her lies even sounded bad in her head. “I didn’t want to do it, really, I didn’t. But everyone was talking about their coming out stories and asked about mine. I freaked out and made up some over the top story.”

  “Alexis!”

  “I know. But it’s not as bad as it sounds. I was only trying to give hope to this poor boy who had just been rejected by his parents for coming out. You should have seen him, Laur. He looked so sad.”

  Lauren held her head in her hands. “Jesus Christ. What a mess. No wonder Ramie’s angry.”

  “You can’t make me feel any worse than I already do,” Alexis said. “I know what I did was wrong. I knew it at every single fucking stage. But I couldn’t backtrack after that first lie was told. It’s like I was on this runaway train and the breaks wouldn’t work.”

  “Here you go.” Todd re-entered the living room and handed out generously poured glasses of wine before dithering at the door.

  “Do you think she’ll forgive me?” Alexis asked. Life without Ramie wasn’t worth thinking about.

  Lauren exchanged a tense glance with Todd. “I don’t know. That’s for her to decide. I know you had the best intentions going into all this, but you’ve got to admit, it doesn’t look good.”

  A solitary sob got stuck in Alexis’s throat. Surely there was something she could do to show Ramie how much she loved her?

  She imagined Ramie rushing back to inform everyone of her transgression. Maddie and Chris were going to hate her. And what about Kenya? She was going to love Alexis’s fall from grace.

  She wiped her runny nose with the back of her sleeve. “I’ve lost everything.”

  Todd gave her a sympathetic smile. “Things will work out. If you’re meant to be together, the universe will step in. Lauren and I broke up about a dozen times before we finally got our act together. It’ll be okay. You’ll see.”

  “Can I stay here tonight?” She didn’t think she could face going back to her place where everything would be just as she and Ramie had left it. A lump formed in her throat and a new wave of tears welled up.

  Lauren wrapped her in a safe embrace. “Of course you can, sweetie. We can get drunk and watch Michelle Rodriguez movies. That is, unless you’d rather head straight to bed of course.”

  “No. Oblivion sounds perfect right about now. I don’t think sleep will come voluntarily with all that’s going on in my head.”

  “Right. That’s sorted then,” Lauren said. “You get yourself nice and comfy on the sofa with some blankets while Todd and I rustle up some snacks.”

  Chapter 25

  Four days had passed since the breakup and Alexis was still inconsolable. She had gotten better at hiding it—a must if she was going to make it through the gauntlet at work—but although her tears had dried, a hollowness had taken their place. She was a shell of the person she’d once been. Her life consisted of work, a bottle of wine to drown her sorrows, and half a pack of paracetamol to wipe out the side effects when the next morning rolled around.

  “Are you going to tell me what’s up?” Shay asked as they were clocking out. “All you’ve done is mope around this place all week.”

  Alexis shrugged on her coat as she made a beeline for the basement door. She figured if she was speedy enough, she might be able to shirk Shay and the million questions she’d been directing at her all afternoon.

  “Well?” Shay prodded, jogging to catch-up. “Something’s obviously wrong. Is there trouble in paradise already?”

  Shay was only teasing, but it hit a nerve.

  “Just leave me alone, all right? I don’t want to talk about it.”

  She stomped down the pathway towards the bus stop and let out a sigh of relief when Shay’s footsteps no longer clipped behind her.

  Her relief lasted only a few minutes before a car pulled up level with the bus stop. Shay opened the passenger door.

  “Get in!” Rain pelted the ground, and she had to yell to be heard over the increasing wind.

  “No thanks.” Alexis pulled the collar of her coat higher up her neck. One of the things she had quickly learned about Shay was that she was a master at getting what she wanted. If she didn’t succeed using one method, she would simply employ another.

  “I mean it,” Shay yelled. “Hurry up and get in.”

  The half dozen people standing with Alexis beneath the bus shelter were eying her curiously now. She could only guess what they were thinking.

  “Alexis Lenz! Don’t make me get out and drag you in here. You know I will if I have to.”

  Alexis wouldn’t put it past her. Unease flared inside her chest, but she managed to hold her nerve until the driver’s door of the beat-up Citroen opened.

  “Oh, for fuck’s sake. I’m coming, all right? This is ridiculous!”

  The driver’s door promptly shut, and Alexis ignored her fellow commuters’ sniggers as she left the safety of the bus shelter.

  “Are you happy now?” she grumbled as she threw herself into the passenger’s seat. She slammed the door harder than necessary and crossed her arms in front of her chest.

  Shay preened and directed a sunny smile at her. “Ecstatic. Now, where are we off to?”

  “I don’t know. You’re the abductor. You should have figured that out before you kidnapped me.”

  Shay furrowed her brow in contemplation as she pulled out into the steady stream of traffic. “You’re right, but this was a spur of the moment thing.” She drove in silence for a few minutes before her face lit up and she tapped the steering wheel. “I know where we can go. There’s this cool gay bar not too far out of town. We can prop up the bar and have a few drinks while I get to the bottom of this little situation.”

  Alexis scowled. “Number one, I told you a billion
times already I don’t want to talk, and number two, I’m not up for drinking.” She’d had more than her fill of the strong stuff over the past few days. Just the mention of booze made her stomach churn.

  Undeterred, Shay shrugged. “Okay. No problem. Let’s hit a coffee shop instead.”

  Fifteen minutes later, Alexis followed Shay through the door of a small, boutique style coffee shop located down a narrow side street on the outskirts of town.

  “How did you know this place was here?” she asked.

  The place was bursting with life, almost every table taken. That’s when she noticed not a single man was present.

  She grabbed Shay’s arm. “Is this a lesbian coffee shop?”

  Shay gave her an impish smile. “You’ve smashed it, Einstein.”

  The barista produced two coffees, and they headed to the only open table at the back of the café near the toilet door.

  “Fantastic,” Alexis muttered as she sat down.

  “Quit complaining,” Shay scolded. “We’re out of the rain and surrounded by our peeps. What more could a girl want?”

  Alexis rolled her eyes. “Whatever.”

  “So…tell me what has you so depressed. And before you give me any bullshit, you can think again. I won’t stop hounding you until you fess up.”

  Silence reigned for several long moments before Alexis sighed and slammed her coffee cup onto the table.

  “Okay, Ramie and I broke up. The whole thing was my fault. End of story.”

  Shay chewed on her lower lip. “That’s shitty. How do you plan on winning her back?”

  Alexis sighed. “I’ve lit up her phone all week with texts and voice messages. She never answers and her inbox by now must be full up.”

  Any hope she’d had of talking Ramie round was practically gone, but she still couldn’t accept that their relationship was over.

  Shay took a sip of her coffee, made a face, then added a spoonful of sugar. “And?”

  “And what?”

  “And what else have you got planned? That’s not the extent of your win-Ramie-back campaign is it? Because if it is, it’s kind of pathetic.”

  Alexis bristled. “I can’t make her speak to me.”

  “No, but you can choose to not give up.”

  “I haven’t given up. I’ve accepted her decision.”

  “Same thing.”

  “No, it’s not. I can’t keep throwing myself at someone who has no interest in me. It’s humiliating, not to mention degrading.”

  “Maybe, but from your tight-lipped explanation of the break-up, I’m guessing you totally deserve it. Maybe your ex wants to see you grovel. I know I would if my girlfriend had wronged me in some epic way.”

  “No. Ramie’s not like that. She might hate me, but I think she’d be just as embarrassed as I would be if I threw myself at her feet.”

  Shay cradled her cup with both hands. “You think, or you know?”

  Hope flared inside Alexis’s chest. Maybe there was still a way of salvaging things.

  “What do you think I should do?”

  Shay held up her hands. “Only you can figure that out. You know her best. What do you think it would take to wear her down? To prove you’re sorry and all that shit.”

  Alexis mulled over her options but drew a blank. “I have no idea.”

  “Then you’d better start brainstorming. Ladies like grand gestures, if you hadn’t already figured that out. Whatever avenue of recourse you decide to go with, you’d better give it your all. You don’t want to be sat here in a few weeks’ time kicking yourself because you were too scared to look like an idiot.”

  “I know.” Alexis held her head in her hand. “I’ve got a lot of soul searching to do.”

  “That you have, my friend.” Shay downed the end of her coffee and folded her arms. “Now that we’ve dealt with this little mishap, how do you feel about getting something to eat? My stomach’s doing some serious rumbling over here.”

  “How about that pizza place on Chain Street?” Alexis’s mouth was already watering.

  Shay’s eyes lit up. “Let’s get moving, lady.”

  “You can do this. You can do this.”

  Alexis held her breath as she repeatedly muttered her mantra whilst walking down the riverside towards Ramie’s narrowboat. She held a bunch of red roses at her side and a million explanations on the tip of her tongue. She had been up half the night thrashing out her game plan and had decided a good old-fashioned apology, paired with some serious grovelling, was her best chance of winning Ramie over.

  The stretch of water was teaming with people with it being the weekend. More than once, she garnered curious glances, but she didn’t care. She was on a mission. She’d do whatever it took to win the love of her life back.

  Ramie’s familiar red and gold boat came into view and a flutter of butterfly wings took flight in Alexis’s stomach. It had been an age since she’d last bathed in Ramie’s aura, and knowing she’d soon be back in her presence had her holding her breath with anticipation.

  The narrowboat was quiet when she reached it. The pretty flower pots that had once adorned the rooftop were gone, and in their place hung two large Christmas wreaths decorated with red bows and blue and silver baubles.

  A pang of regret hit her hard. She had so been looking forward to spending Christmas with Ramie, but unless she could convince her to give her a second chance, she would be all alone instead. Her father had invited her to dinner, but as much as she wanted to reconnect, she wouldn’t go if Carol was going to be shooting daggers at her across the table. That just left Lauren and Todd, and she refused to ruin their Christmas by playing third wheel.

  She stepped onto the wooden deck with unsteady legs and descended the narrow set of steps which led to the front door.

  “She’s not in!” a gruff voice called out when Alexis rapped on the door.

  She looked over her shoulder and came face to face with an elderly man standing on a barge just a few metres over.

  “Excuse me?” Alexis wasn’t sure whether he was addressing her or someone else.

  “She’s not in,” the man repeated. He held a thick enamel mug in his hand and steam pooled out of the top, clouding his features. “I saw her take off an hour or so ago, so I doubt she’ll be back for a good while yet.”

  Defeated, Alexis dropped the arm holding the flowers. This whole escapade had been for nothing.

  Climbing back onto the deck, she forced a smile. “Thanks for letting me know. I suppose I’ll have to come back another time.”

  “Those are some lovely flowers you’ve got there, love. Are you two courting?”

  “That’s the plan.”

  “I remember when I used to pick up my Beryl for a night at the dance hall. I was always sure to bring a bunch of carnations and a box of her favourite chocolates. Ahh, those were the days. We were married for fifty-six years before the cancer took her from me. We never know how much time we have left with our loved ones. You make sure you hold onto your sweetheart, girly.”

  The ache in Alexis’s heart strengthened. She may never get the opportunity to share her life with Ramie because of her stupid lies.

  The man ambled closer. “Are you in the doghouse?”

  Alexis wanted to deny it but didn’t see the point. She’d parroted off enough lies over the past couple of months. If she was turning over a new leaf, she needed to start as she meant to go on.

  “Yeah. How did you guess?”

  The man chuckled. “I’ve been there myself more than a time or two. I know that downtrodden look like the back of my hand.”

  “Do you have any advice?” She’d take any she could get right now.

  The man rubbed his stubbly chin. “Hm…the best advice I can give you is to not give up. Too many young people expect things to come to them easily these days, but a good relationship takes a great deal of work. Make sure you tell her you love her. Go out of your way to make her feel like the most important woman alive. If you get it right, then
this will be no more than a bump in the road.”

  God, she hoped she was going to get it right. Adding her relationship with Ramie to her long list of failures would be devastating.

  She clambered off the boat and held up a hand in farewell. “Thanks. That sounds like some sage advice. I should probably introduce myself. I’m Alexis.”

  “Frank,” the man called back. “I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you, my girl. Good luck!”

  The hand by Alexis’s head morphed into a salute. “Thanks. I’m going to need it.”

  Chapter 26

  “Hi, Lex, just calling to see how you’re doing. You’ve been radio silent all week. You’re not still wallowing in self-pity, are you? I know you’re heartbroken, but you need to dust yourself off and get back out into the world.”

  Alexis flicked through the channels on her TV and held in a sigh. Lauren had bawled her eyes out for weeks over blokes in the past. Where was her compassion now that Alexis needed a shoulder to cry on? It hadn’t even been a full two weeks yet.

  “For your information, I’m getting ready to go out.” She wasn’t, but Lauren didn’t need to know that. She’d slogged her guts out at work all week. She deserved to curl up under her duvet in peace.

  A tut drifted down the line. “Okay. I believe you.” Lauren’s tone of voice begged to differ. “I’ve just had a phone call from Maddie I think you’ll be interested in.”

  Alexis’s stomach twisted uneasily. “What did she want?”

  Maddie had attempted to call multiple times and even dropped by the library to try and talk with her, but Alexis had avoided her, too scared to face her judgement.

  “She just asked how you were coping and if you were as devastated as Ramie is.”

  “What did you tell her?”

  “What do you think I told her? I said you were heartbroken. If it makes you feel any better, I think she believed me when I told her you meant no harm. She knows you’re a good person.”