Sleeping with Monsters

by Hutchins, Amelia

  “No, Lucian. The difference is I never needed you. I wanted you, and there’s a huge difference between the two. I wanted you with every fiber of my being and you fucking broke me, like I was some sort of promise you decided not to keep. Do you have any idea how that makes me feel? I feel worthless, like I wasn’t worth the chance you’d have taken to trust me to follow your lead. And now, now you’re all cozy as a stripper and a dollar bill with my sister. And you get mad when I kiss someone else you forced to claim me? Why are we here right now? Whose choices led us here? Because it sure as shit wasn’t mine. Mine would have been by your side, unwaveringly following you into the depths of Hell if you’d asked. So guess what, if I kiss someone else? You deal with it, because I didn’t push you away, you fucking threw me away like your unwanted trash.”

  “I would never throw you away, Lena. I saved your foolhardy life, and right now you’re making it very hard not to slam you against that wall and prove it to you. You think I want Kendra? I assure you, you couldn’t be further from the truth. She’s even colder than she was before, and my feelings for you didn’t change one fucking iota when you thought you were her. Staying away from you was one of the hardest things I’ve had to do, and trust me, I’ve done a lot of hard things in my lifetime, but none of them affected me as you have. So throw your fucking fit and get the fuck over it, because you and me? We’re far from done. You want me and I want you, and that’s all that should fucking matter right now. People outside are dying and you’re too pissed off to see past your anger to grab what is right in front of you,” he seethed as he boxed me against the wall. “There’s not another woman that roams this world or any other who I want more than you.”

  I swallowed as I closed my eyes against the angry tears. “Then why didn’t you let me choose? Why did you take away pieces of me?” I uttered painfully.

  “Because you would have run right to Lucifer in your pain to get her back, and I couldn’t allow that. You think we weren’t being watched? You think he didn’t have fucking minions up here watching me? I made them keep you away from me until I was sure the glamour we’d cloaked you in had worked on the demons. Once I knew, I made them send you to me every fucking chance I got, every fucking excuse to see you I took. Life isn’t fucking black and white, Magdalena, wake the fuck up and get past it. Be pissed, but get the fuck over it.”

  “You think it’s that easy?” I demanded angrily. “You erased my brother, and then you went even further and you erased my tattoos, which meant something to me. They were proof I’d survived something, and you obliterated it from my past like it was written in fucking sharpie. I was falling for you and then you played God in my world; you didn’t trust me and that hurts the most. You made me into something I’m not, and now you expect me to just go back to the girl I was before. Why? Because your world didn’t change? Mine has been shaken from its foundation and left in a pile of fucking rubble to rebuild alone. You burned my world down, and in the same breath, you didn’t let the flames touch me, but in the end, you were the flames that burned me the most. You protected me and let someone I love take the fall. She’ll never be the same, and neither will I.”

  Footsteps sounded down the hall and Lucian took a step away from me as we watched my grandmother and mother converge on our location. I turned my head from them, wiping away the tears before I walked in their direction.

  “I need to speak to you, both of you. Now,” I announced.

  “Is everything all right?” my mother questioned.

  “We need to talk about Drake,” I growled.

  My mother’s blue eyes grew rounded as she moved hers between me and my grandmother. She knew that I knew she’d lied to me from birth. My grandmother asked Lucian for a room and he directed us to one, which I entered silently. Once the door had closed, I rounded on my mother and stared at her shaken pallor.

  “You need to explain why you would withhold it from the coven and us,” I snapped.

  “Drake was a born dark witch,” my grandmother answered for her sternly. “It was forbidden by the coven. We weren’t aware of it when they first got together; he was awakened by the ancestors, or so we had assumed. He used dark magic to make a deal with a witch; in exchange, he was given a mate of pure blood. He got Fiona. We were unaware of what he was, or what he’d done at the time. They conceived the boys on that very night. They fell in love, Lena. You and I both know the heart doesn’t care what is wrong or right. It goes after what it wants no matter what the brain says otherwise.

  “We didn’t know what had happened until it was too late, and even then, they were in love. When Benjamin turned dark, it was too late to drive the darkness out of him. Drake took him to the cottage for a while, hid him from the others. I myself took them food and supplies. Months later, I watched Joshua as your mother snuck up to see him, to tell him it was time to go away from here, as the others had begun to notice his presence, or lack of. Your mother became pregnant that very night as they said their goodbyes. That was why, on summer solstice every year, we took you girls to the seer in the woods. You were both protected from the darkness. So, when Drake and Benjamin disappeared, we vowed to find her another mate immediately and claim he sired you and Kendra.”

  “You could have told us,” I whispered through the thickening in my throat. “What if we’d changed? What if we’d formed a darkness inside of us and had to hide it to remain here?” I asked.

  “Then we’d have handled you as well,” my grandmother answered coldly. “No witch can be born of darkness without being evil. It’s written from the beginning of the tales of witches, Lena. Those born to darkness will destroy us all. They cannot fight the evil within their veins and souls for more than a few years, but as children it’s worse. They are the truest form of evil, and why the humans have tales of evil witches from the dawn of man. Understand this: Benjamin should have been drowned to purify and release his soul, yet we didn’t have the strength to do it. So we let him live, and not a day has gone by that we have not wondered what kind of monster we allowed to live. He is of our bloodline, which means he is very powerful, and with his father driving him, there’s no telling what he has done.”

  “You think he unleashed the demons on us?” I asked in disbelief.

  “Who else would have done this?” my mother finally asked.

  “Benjamin is mortal,” I announced. “Mortals do not hold enough power or magic to unleash Hell on earth. He didn’t do this. He is darkness, but he is not what you think. He pulled me from the wreckage and did his best to keep me alive. He allowed me to leave without any argument.”

  “But not before he filled you with discord. He told you who your father was, and he probably told you a million other lies. Of course he let you go, Lena. He made sure you were questioning things before he did so, didn’t he?”

  “What he said to me made sense,” I replied. He’d shown me proof, which one of those things had already been proven to be correct.

  “He isn’t what you think, granddaughter,” my grandmother whispered. “He’s tried to turn you against us, do not let him win this fight. He showed up right before the gates opened and allowed a few more demons out, and now again as the gates have failed. That is a truth as well. Now, tomorrow we will hold a dance for the new witches and ours to become united in a cause worth fighting for. You will be in attendance, and you will cease leaving this place, do you understand?”

  “But I—”

  “Enough!” she shouted and glared at me. “I’ve been patient with you, Lena. It ends here. You are not to leave here anymore. You will stop forcing Kendra to join you and taking her from the safety of this place in her condition. It’s not safe for either of you out there.”

  “I didn’t want to leave, she did!” I snapped, and both regarded at me as if I was losing it.

  “Kendra reported less than an hour ago that you forced her to leave here three times. I was also to
ld that you were just witnessed in the club glaring at her as Lucian showed her attention and then we find you and him together, arguing. If you continue, you will be confined to the room you are staying in.”

  “Yes ma’am,” I said, spinning on my heel as I exited the room. That bitch set me up! Maybe she didn’t have a devil’s trap on her body, because this shit? This shit was low, and no matter what had happened, I didn’t deserve it from her.

  I made my way through the heavily crowded club, full of witches. Once I’d taken a seat at the bar, Spyder pulled up the stool next to me and glared at me. He rapped his knuckles on the bar and I smirked as I gave him my attention.

  “You want to explain what the fuck that was?” he demanded as the bartender approached. I shook my head as I gave Vlad a small smile.

  “Get me drunk,” I said as Vlad gave me a lopsided smile.

  “Now why would a pretty girl like you want to get drunk?” he asked, pushing his long black hair away from his face as he watched me.

  “Because I just kissed Spyder, got berated by the High Priestess, and because some people have lost their integrity,” I muttered as I stared him down in open challenge. “So get me a drink, please. Something strong,” I frowned as I turned back to Spyder, deepening the frown. He had a black eye, which wasn’t healing as fast as his other injuries had before. “Someone hit you?” I asked, wondering if I was misjudging it, or if the shadows were playing games on me.

  “I ran into a fist,” he said before he swung his glare to Vlad. “Jack Daniels, on the rocks,” he grumbled as he turned to face the crowd. There was no music playing, which seemed off. Every time I’d been in here the music had been bumping.

  I dismissed him, observing Vlad as he poured two fingers of Jack into the glasses and then pushed them in our direction. I took the cup and tipped it up, swallowing it in one gulp before I set it back down and pushed it back.

  “More,” I said, ignoring the two sets of eyes that stared at me.

  After the fourth, I slowed down and turned, taking in the witches who mingled or flirted. There were so many of them that I didn’t even know who was who anymore, or which coven they were from. My head swayed as I tipped the glass and swallowed deeply.

  “You’re not going to drink it away, kitty,” Spyder said as he surveyed me with hooded eyes. “That pain of betrayal, it’s not going anywhere.”

  “I wasn’t betrayed,” I stated, watching him as his lips tipped up, forming an alluring smile. “I never said anything about being betrayed.” What the fuck, did the walls have ears?

  “You didn’t have to,” he laughed as Vlad nodded.

  “Girl drinks like that, she’s either hiding something or she’s hurting. Sometimes, it’s both,” Vlad tossed in.

  “What if the girl just wants to get drunk?” I pointed out defensively.

  “Girls don’t get drunk without other girls,” Vlad countered.

  “Then there are things like clothes coming off, hooting and hollering, and the fun starts. You’re not doing any of those things, and you’re drinking with me,” Spyder retorted as his forehead creased as he struggled not to laugh at the disgruntled look I gave him. “Go to bed, kitty. Before I end up with another black eye,” he warned.

  “Fine,” I grumbled as I pulled out a few dollars and started counting change.

  “I got this,” Spyder announced as he pushed the money back into my pocket and gave me a gentle push in the direction of the sleeping quarters.

  “He shouldn’t have hit you,” I said.

  “It was fucking worth it.”

  “If you say so,” I muttered as I started to walk away from him.

  “I say so.”

  Chapter 27

  I strode down the hallway, oblivious to everyone and anything happening around me as anger simmered to the front of my mind. I hadn’t wanted to leave the club or the security it offered, which was absolute. Lucian was a sure bet against Lucifer, and yet Kendra kept throwing it in my face that I owed her for what she’d endured for me.

  The worst part was, I’d thought we had been making progress on fixing what we’d broken, but we hadn’t. The first chance she’d gotten, she’d thrown me under the bus. Kendra had forced me to go and then turned it around and made it look as if I had been the one pushing it. On top of that, she’d made a move on Lucian, which I knew I shouldn’t care about, but I did.

  Watching them together had made me feel eviscerated, sickened to the point that I wanted to physically hurt her, my own flesh and blood. It shouldn’t ever be like that, and yet the red hot rage as her fingers traced Lucian’s hand had made my magic unfurl from deep inside of me. As if it wanted release to do harm, which white magic never did.

  I slammed into something solid and stammered as I righted myself, holding onto what I had hit. Emerald green eyes watched me as I lifted mine to see what I’d run into.

  “Whoa there, little lady,” he said with a soft laugh as he held me up. “Not that I mind being ran into by something like you, but you might want to pay attention when you’re walking,” he joked and I stepped back, away from him. His touch felt oily, as if he was tainted.

  “Sorry,” I mumbled as I tried to sidestep him, only for him to block my way as I did so. “Problem?” I asked as I gave him a curious look.

  “Weren’t you beat up the other day?” he asked as he slowly slid his gaze down my face to my breasts which were pushed up by the top I wore. “Damn, girl. You’re beautiful.”

  “What was your name?” I asked as his smile faltered.

  “Falcon,” he announced as he held out his hand. I accepted it, shaking it as I felt a spark ignite the moment we touched. It was nothing like the one when Lucian touched me; no desire unfurled or unraveled inside of me. It was something else, as if I knew him and yet I couldn’t place him anywhere before the day we’d all come to Club Chaos for sanctuary. “And you’re Magdalena Fitzgerald, in the flesh. You’ve caused quite the stir of chatter with your power in the community. One of the strongest witches in the bloodlines to date, or so some are saying.”

  “Is that what they’re saying?” I asked, wondering why this guy’s vibes were giving me the creeps and hitting all of my alarm bells.

  “And that you’re single and unmated,” he replied smoothly as he grinned impishly. “Tomorrow I hear we will have a mixer and your grandmother had made it known that she’d like you to be considered as a mate to those of us who hold power, real power,” he continued pointedly. “I plan to place my hand in that pool for a night with you, or longer.”

  “She is telling people that?” I quizzed as I tilted my head.

  “Seems she doesn’t much care for the one who you fucked, and would prefer you pick from your own species,” he replied with a hint of something in his tone.

  “Species? I thought we were all human here,” I returned.

  “Are we?” he countered as he bowed and walked away, leaving me to puzzle over his cryptic words.

  Great; so my grandmother, who had begged Lucian to bring us here, was trying to hook me up with some magical dick. Kendra was carrying Lucifer’s child, and it was widely known. I was the last Fitzgerald available to carry on the line at the moment, until Kendra birthed whatever she was carrying.

  My feet moved as I considered how to get out of my grandma’s scheme, which she hadn’t bothered to inform me of, when someone stepped out from around the next corner and blew something into my eyes. I coughed as my face burned with liquid fire.

  Pain erupted as whatever it was continued to burn as my legs gave out and I hit the floor on all fours. I looked up, seeing Kendra with a male as they watched me. I tried to ask her what the hell was going on, but nothing came out other than a stifled sob.

  I rolled to my side as pain burned through me, enveloping my mind until I felt it, a darkness rising inside of me. It foug
ht to save me from whatever was happening to me. Voices began shattering from inside my head, and popping erupted in my ears as if I was rapidly rising in altitude. The voices grew louder, clearer, and then, as the darkness rescinded, so too did they. I lay there on the floor until the whispered voices became further and further away from me.

  I pushed off of the ground, touching my face as I sat on my knees in the middle of the hall floor, blinking as my vision swam with the fading silhouettes of my attackers. I used the wall for support as I held myself up, leaning against it as I wiped at the filmy sand that they’d used on me. My hands came away clean and I swung my face towards the laughter that sounded from the end of the hallway.

  “Kill them before they kill you,” a small voice whispered, and I looked around, peering down the hallway in both directions.

  “She is safe from you,” a female’s voice ran out, echoing inside my head. I clapped my hands over my ears as my eyelids closed.

  “We protect her!” another shouted, and I doubled over.

  “Who will protect it from me? You cannot save them both,” a small voice whispered, and nausea swirled inside my stomach as they chanted.

  “Stop!” I screamed and then listened as everything grew silent inside my head. Fucking hell, the grimoires I’d managed to hold silent were now active in my head? How? I’d bound them to be silent, to be unable to communicate, which was why I’d ignored Synthia’s warning. I wiped at my nose as something ran from it, drippling over my lip.

  I stared at my hand as red flowed from my nose onto it. It flowed steadily, and with effort I managed to push from the wall and head in the direction of my room. My hands dropped as I swayed precariously on my feet, slowing as the wall gave way to another hallway. I stumbled, collapsing onto the floor, and began crawling.

  When the wall was back, I grabbed on to it and made my way back to my feet before I heard footsteps approaching. I paused, unsure if I should bolt or if I even could. I turned towards the wall, resting my head against it. Slowly, I crumpled and hit the floor hard.