Scared Shiftless: An Ex-Shifter turned Vampire Hunter Urban Fantasy (The Legend of Nyx Book 1)

by Theophilus Monroe

  I imagine whichever human Wolfgang had acquired this ability from, they were probably a good salesperson. Salespeople were naturally good persuaders. The person probably hadn’t taken it so far as to be able to compel people against their will, but when humans have an innate magical quality, it usually manifests as a shadow of its potential.

  I thought better of confronting Wolfgang about it. An ability like that… it’s dangerous. But if he didn’t want me to suspect he had the ability, he wouldn’t have demonstrated it in front of me.

  Fear… that was his tactic.

  He wanted me to have enough fear of him that I’d second-guess double-crossing him.

  So I changed the subject. I wasn’t afraid of him. But seeing how it had worked with Joey, I was resolved to avoid eye contact with Wolfgang. Perhaps that was why he hadn’t looked directly at me since we’d started speaking. “I wish there was a way to know whether the Order had enough intelligence on Alice to eventually send me after her.”

  Wolfgang grinned as he took a sip of his drink. “Don’t worry about that. If you prove to be one of their best, which I’m sure you will, it is an inevitability.”

  I cocked my head. “Sounds like they’ve sent a lot of their best hunters after her.”

  Wolfgang nodded. “You have to play it carefully. They’ll want to get their most out of you first.”

  I huffed. “Because I imagine not a lot of hunters who go after Alice ever come back.”

  Wolfgang nodded. “Not a lot is too generous. So far as I’m aware, no human has hunted Alice and lived to tell the tale.”

  I shook my head. “I mean, a good hunter is hard to find. If they know it’s likely they’ll die, why do they keep sending hunters after her? Why not send a whole army of them?”

  Wolfgang huffed. “I half-suspect that if you get a contract on Alice, it’s something of a crossroads. They either know something about you that they feel needs to be judged, or they believe you will redeem yourself by succeeding.”

  I cocked my head. “Is that why you chose me?”

  Wolfgang shook his head. “I came to you because I knew you had motive. And experience. But I also knew that, eventually, if the Order suspected you weren’t… How should I put this…”

  “Cis?” I asked. “Their standard of what’s supposedly ‘natural?’”

  Wolfgang nodded. “The Order isn’t exactly LGBT-friendly.”

  I chuckled. “You think? They’re affiliated with that God Hates church.”

  Wolfgang nodded. “Sort of ridiculous, isn’t it?”

  I shook my head. “That’s one word you could use. I’d call it tragic. There are real people, good people, hurt by their bigotry. And they imagine it’s justified because they think they’re condemning sin.”

  Wolfgang nodded. “I understand. I used to think like that, myself. But living a few centuries as a vampire has a way of altering one’s perspective on the sort of absolutes, the black-and-white, the good-and-evil binaries they operate with.”

  “No room for shades of gray.”

  “And certainly not fifty of them.”

  I smiled. “I enjoyed those books.”

  “I suspected you did,” Wolfgang said. “My point is this: there is very little in the world that is purely good or evil. The problem with the worldview of those in the Order of the Morning Dawn is that they assume any action must be oriented toward either good or evil. That any condition is either holy and righteous or devilish and damnable.”

  “Doesn’t accord with my brief experience with humans,” I said. “I’ve yet to meet anyone who’s mostly bad but doesn’t have a little goodness in them. And I haven’t met anyone so good that they didn’t have a dark side.”

  Wolfgang nodded. “And the longer you live… Don’t get me wrong, I know you’re technically at least as old as I am.”

  “Probably older,” I said. “But my memories don’t go back so far in my prior existence. It’s all a blur.”

  “Precisely my point,” Wolfgang said. “When it comes to understanding humans, you’re still an amateur. But you’re on the right path. I think you’ll find, in the end, that no one is pure of motive. All humans have mixed intentions.”

  I took a sip of my drink. “Only humans?”

  “Vampires, too,” Wolfgang said. “Despite opinions to the contrary, there’s more that motivates us than a craving for blood. We are looking for love and meaning as much as any other species.”

  I shook my head. “I wish I could say I hate you for your hypocrisies. But I can relate more than I care to admit.”

  “But you still hunt us,” Wolfgang said. “Is it, perhaps, self-loathing more than your desire for revenge that motivates Nyx?”

  I took a giant gulp from my Bloody Mary and left my glass half-empty on the bar as I stood up and straightened my dress. “You’d have to ask Nyx about that. Tonight, I’m Nicky.”

  “We’ll be speaking soon,” Wolfgang said.

  I paused a moment and turned. “And I presume you’ll find me again when it’s time?”

  Wolfgang nodded. “I know where to find you. Always.”

  I rolled my eyes. It would be one thing if he’d said he knew where I worked. But “always” was mildly disconcerting. Likely by design.

  I intended to spend an hour or so fraternizing with my fans, but I needed to freshen up. People don’t realize how exhausting performing can be. I mean, it didn’t take much for me to sweat since I was water. And while my body odor wasn’t nearly as repulsive as a human’s, and certainly nowhere near as rank as a vampire’s, it still affected my appearance.

  All the performers at Leotards and Lace had their own vanity stations. Mine was next to Gina’s. She was applying mascara in her mirror. Once she was in full drag, you couldn’t even recognize Geraldo. He was dormant. Gina had emerged and she was about to rock the stage.

  “Good to see you’re doing better,” I said.

  “Better?” Gina asked. “What are you talking about?”

  “After the other night,” I said. “The attack…”

  “Ho, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I had a fantastic time the other night.”

  I cocked my head. “Gina, I came and saw you at your apartment. You were still in drag, hours later. You were crying.”

  “Bitch, you’re tripping!” Gina said. “Why would I be upset? The night I had with that man…”

  “That man?”

  “Wolfie!” Gina said. “I’ll have to introduce you. But don’t you go trying to make use of my sloppy seconds, ho.”

  I laughed halfheartedly. “I’d never consider it.”

  Gina leaned over and gave me a friendly kiss on the cheek before heading toward the stage. “Wish them luck!”

  “Them?”

  “Because this bitch is about to knock ‘em dead!”

  I chuckled. “I can already hear them screaming for you. Do your thing, Gina!”

  As she left, I stared at myself in the mirror. Did she really not remember? Why did she think she’d had some kind of romantic, passionate affair with Wolfgang? What had he done to her? I mean, he didn’t just make her forget. He’d replaced her memory with a concocted one of his own.

  He didn’t just compel people. What he could do, the abilities he had…

  If he didn’t only have the ability to compel people, but could literally rewrite their memories… Hell, he could do almost anything to anyone and make them believe they’d been frolicking in a flower garden, visiting the ballet, taking a cruise… anything! And he’d get away with it.

  And could I be sure he hadn’t done it to me? Would it work on me at all? Were there any limits to his abilities? Probably, but I didn’t know what they were. I mean, there must be, otherwise he’d never allow me to suspect he had these abilities to begin with. He’d dropped the hints. He’d compelled the bartender right in front of me. He’d manipulated Gina’s mind, and he had to realize there was a better-than-average chance she and I would talk about it.

  If anyth
ing, he was toying with me. And what was even more frightening… if he couldn’t get Alice on his own, despite how powerful he was, how powerful had she become since I last encountered her? And why did Wolfgang seem to think I had a better chance of staking her than he did?

  My phone buzzed from inside my drawer. I had it on vibrate and could feel it through the surface of my vanity. I didn’t want my phone ringing and annoying the queens while I was performing, and I didn’t want to take it on stage with me.

  One thing my get-up lacked was pockets. And it wasn’t like I could stick it in my bra inconspicuously. Not like I had much up top to show off. I mean, since implants weren’t a viable option for me, I had to work with what I had, which wasn’t much. But I had my tricks.

  Needless to say, I didn’t need my phone on stage, anyway.

  I pulled out my phone. Multiple texts. All from Devin. Apparently he was a little antsy that I hadn’t replied yet.

  The handler—aka Mina—had another hit for us.

  And they needed me to meet them at the church at dawn.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  I’d barely had a chance to clean off my makeup after the night I’d had at Leotards and Lace. Since sleep was more of a luxury than a necessity for me, I opted to enjoy the rest of the night before I’d have to undergo the inevitable transition back to “Nick” in the morning.

  A lot of flirtation.

  While I was flattered by it, I didn’t reciprocate it much. I don’t know why I was so fixated on Devin. He wasn’t that impressive as a hunter. He’d mostly followed my lead. And he came with baggage. More, frankly, than I had the patience to deal with. And besides, did I want to be the one that forced the issue with his family? Especially if it was “Nick” he was into anyway—and technically speaking, Nick didn’t exist.

  Nick was to me as Captain Kirk was to William Shatner. A character. Not particularly well played, but no less unforgettable.

  Pursuing Devin didn’t make sense on any level. There wasn’t a single rational reason why pursuing him was a good idea.

  But it wasn’t about what my head was telling me. I suppose the heart wants what the heart wants. If my heart had anything to do with it. I mean, what else would it be?

  Don’t answer that question.

  I try not to even think about that part of me… much less with it.

  When I pulled into the church parking lot, Devin was already waiting, his passenger-side door wide open. I parked my bike, grabbed my duffel, and almost tripped over my own feet—not used to those damned man-boots—as I turned and climbed into his car.

  “You ready for this?” Devin was speaking more quickly than before. The eagerness in his eyes was endearing, if not downright cute.

  I grinned a little. “Of course! Another daytime stake and bake?”

  Devin raised a single eyebrow and cocked his head. “A stake and bake?”

  I snorted. “Sorry, I guess we don’t do the baking part. That’s the job of the inner circle. But it’s what I call a quick kill. Stake the vampire, burn his heart. Stake and bake.”

  Devin laughed out loud. “That’s good. I’ll have to remember that one. But the answer to the question is yes and no.”

  “What do you mean by that?” I asked, buckling my seat belt.

  “It should be quick, but I don’t believe there will be any staking going on. Today’s mission is about intelligence gathering.” Devin shifted his car into drive and eased on the gas.

  “Intelligence on what?”

  “A vampire we’ve been after a while. Not to worry, they won’t send us after her. I mean, I hope they won’t. Surely not, since my dad is a part of the inner circle.”

  I scratched my head. Could I really be so lucky that they’d already gotten us involved in the hunt for Alice? “What can you tell me about this vampire we’re hoping to find?”

  “Turned by another equally notorious vampire. This vampire used to be a nightwalker.”

  “A nightwalker?” I asked, feigning ignorance. If he knew that I knew what nightwalkers were, well… it might give away that my familiarity with the Order of the Morning Dawn was more than it should have been.

  “Nightwalkers are vampires the Order turned to have them hunt other vampires,” Devin said. “Kind of fucked up, if you ask me. But the Order has always believed that the ends were more important than the means.”

  I nodded. “I can see why that might be a controversial project for the Order to be involved in.”

  “It is,” Devin said. “I mean, it was. Technically the nightwalkers were disbanded four or five years ago. Shit went south with one of the originals. It’s a long story, but she’s the one we’re trying to get information about.”

  “So the Order doesn’t know where she is?”

  Devin shrugged. “They know exactly where she is. And now, so do we.”

  “We do?”

  Devin tossed me his phone. The order from the handler, who I knew was Mina, was open on his screen. “So this vampire is still in Kansas City?” I asked.

  Devin nodded. “Well, she’s back, anyway. She comes and goes. She apparently has some business here that keeps bringing her back. Convenient for us.”

  “So if we know where she’s at, why are we being sent for intelligence gathering only?” I asked. “Why not send us in for the kill?”

  “Because we’re not ready,” Devin said. “But I think what you’re really asking is what information we’re trying to get so that someone can go after her later.”

  “Of course,” I said. “That’s what I intended to say.”

  Devin nodded. “We need to figure out her patterns. See if we can observe her using any newfound abilities. She’s managed to acquire some kind of shapeshifting ability which, I should say, has made tracking her a thousand times harder than I’m told it used to be.”

  I shook my head. “I can imagine.”

  Little did Devin know, of course, I didn’t have to imagine very hard. Since she could change her shape, she could appear as anyone. I mean, I’d smell her. And every vampire has their own sort of stink. I’d never forget hers. But still, asking around for information when you don’t have a firm grip on her appearance is pretty much pointless.

  It’s not enough to know where a vampire might be found,” Devin continued. “If you’re going to make an attempt to eliminate her, especially one as powerful as she is, you need to know everything.”

  “I concur,” I said. “But vampires have exceptional hearing. All their senses are heightened. Won’t she realize we’re on her tail?”

  “Probably why we were chosen for this,” Devin said. “I’ve never been involved in anything to do with Alice before.”

  “Alice?” I asked. “This order on your phone refers to her as Night’s Bane.”

  “A code for her,” Devin explained. “Or more like a nickname. She insisted, when she was a part of the Order, that she not be called by her human name. Alice was dead, she’d said. She was no longer that girl.”

  “And when did she die, exactly?” I knew the answer to that question, but it seemed like a question that someone who’d never heard of Alice should be asking. So I did.

  “Early eighteen-hundreds,” Devin said. “The story goes she barely survived a case of consumption. Her roommate at the sanitarium didn’t. Not exactly. Her roommate was a witch, and her coven had arranged for her to be turned into a vampire to spare her life. Alice just happened to be in the room when it happened. And, so the story goes, Alice tried to eliminate her. As a member of the Order, she saw it as her solemn duty. But she failed. Twice, actually.”

  “Twice?”

  “First they caught her. Cut out her heart. But again, the vampire witch’s coven found a way to revive her. When Alice went after her again to finish the job, she got bit.”

  “And the Order healed her?”

  Devin nodded. “Which turned her into a vampire. Mercy, the vampire who’d bitten her and technically sired her, was unstoppable. The Order thought it would take an
other vampire to eliminate her. And that’s how the nightwalkers were born—pardon the pun. I mean, since they were technically dead. Or undead, anyway.”

  “I knew what you meant,” I said, nodding along to his story. I knew most of the details, and a few others. Though I’d first learned the story from Mercy’s perspective. The way she told it was a bit more emotional, of course. I mean, Mercy’s father was a part of the Order, too. And it was he who saw to it that her heart was cut out. Mercy and her sire ended up killing him. I think it haunted her still. I mean, no one really gets over killing their own parents. Even if her father was a bit of a dick, from the way it sounded, he was still her father.

  Of course, I never really knew my parents. Elementals don’t rear their own young like humans do. But I could imagine, having spent enough time around humans, that the memory of that must’ve haunted her for the better part of two centuries.

  Devin, of course, didn’t have any empathy for Mercy’s side of the story. I didn’t blame him, exactly. The first time I met Mercy in the asylum I tried to stake her with my stiletto heel.

  Since she didn’t have a heart, and thankfully since she had more patience than I did, the conflict became an odd pretense for the beginning of our friendship. It was a short-lived friendship, and not one we would have likely entered into if we didn’t have mutually beneficial interests. But it was a friendship no less.

  At first I was eager for the mission. But then I started thinking about something Devin had said. We were probably chosen for this because Alice wouldn’t recognize us. We hadn’t been on her case before.

  Well, considering that I was still in the form she desired most, that she’d made me this way, she’d recognize me in a heartbeat. I mean, insofar as her heart beats at all. Vampire hearts beat incredibly slowly. I have good hearing, but not good enough. And from what I understand, the beats slow down the longer one has been a vampire. I don’t think it ever stops completely. In the end, perhaps, beats might be separated by hours, even days. But the heart would still beat a little. Not necessarily because their bodies require it, but because some semblances of humanity remain, even after centuries.