by Holt, Leah
Virgo looked down on me, he treated me like shit, but he always gave me another chance. It was as if he refused to accept that he failed with me, still hoping he could manipulate me into that mindless puppet he always dreamed I'd be.
But other girls, girls who had trouble falling in line, they weren't given room for any extra chances. They got a single do over, that it was it. This was her fresh start, she didn't have any left.
“I don't care, this isn't your fault. It's his fault, he chose to do this to me, not you.”
Taking in a deep breath, I hung my head. “Aubrey—”
“No, Berlin, promise me if you ever get out, you'll just run.”
“I'm not—”
“Promise me,” she said, her tone strong and rigid.
Sucking in a gasp of air, I bit my bottom lip, unable to give her such a promise. I could never promise her that I wouldn't risk everything to save her and everyone else there. It wasn't right, it wasn't what I felt.
I knew deep down that if I had the opportunity, I would take it. I'd die just so all the other girls could go free. There was no one waiting for me outside of this horrible place, I had no family to run back to.
But most of those girls did. They had mothers and fathers, brothers and sisters, people who were probably worried to death and searching day and night for them.
I would gladly trade my life for theirs.
The sharp creek of the floor outside my door caught my attention, making my spine jerk straight. Tipping my head towards the hall, I listened carefully as I watched the door for movement.
Holding my breath, my eyes steadied on the handle as the metallic ping of the lock rang through the air and the door busted open in one wild whoosh.
Taking a jump backwards, the void of the doorway was filled by one of Virgo's men, his shoulders almost touching each side of the frame.
He went by the name Blue, and he was one of the assholes who never blinked at an order. Virgo let him punish me once, and I swear, he smiled the entire time.
“What the hell do you want? Why are you here?” I asked, keeping my eyes on the man as I backed up further into my room.
“You're coming with me.” His voice was harsh and deep as he started forward, walking straight towards me.
“I'm not going anywhere, not until you tell me why.”
Letting out a husky laugh, he growled. “I don't need to tell you shit.”
With long hard steps, Blue swept across the floor in a flash, curling his arms around my waist. My instinct to fight kicked in, causing me to swing, lashing out as hard as I could.
“No! Let me go!” Scratching with my nails, I caught the side of his cheek, feeling his skin rip open as my fingers raked down.
But he didn't flinch, he didn't yell, he didn't teeter on his heels. Blue laughed, releasing me for a mere second to wipe the blood off his face, only to reinsert his fist into my hair.
Tearing my head back, he cocked his fist, letting it rest in the air long enough for me to know what was coming next. Clutching my hair tighter, he let his arm go, driving it right into my face.
I felt his knuckles as they connected with my eye, each one seemingly designed to strike me on their own. The sound that came out of his mouth as he hit me made me cower, worried that there were more on the way.
Covering my face with my hands, I tucked my head under my arm, hoping that I'd be able to block any more punches.
But he didn't hit me again, he traded the violence for an eerie silence, relaxing his arm at his side.
“Why are you doing this? What's going on?” Peeking my eyes out cautiously, I braced myself.
Blue laughed, his smile cold and pleased all in the same breath. He enjoyed watching me fear his strength, he was proud of himself for how he made me feel. Staying silent, he turned in one giant swoop, snapping my neck and yanking me along.
Trying to stay on my feet, I wrapped both my hands around his thick wrist and dug my heels into the floor. “No! I'm not going with you!”
Blue was too strong, jerking my head with a single yank, causing me to fall onto my knees. Keeping his head on the door, he moved like he was rolling a suitcase behind him and not a living person.
“Stop! Let me go!” My screams went unheard as my knees buckled beneath me, forcing my body to flop straight as a board. “No! I won't go! Let go of me!” Kicking my legs, I tried to pull his fingers out of my hair, using my nails to pinch and claw at his wrist.
What is he doing? Where the hell is he taking me?
Aubrey was pounding on the wall, her voice shrill as she screamed at the top of her lungs for him to let me go. He ignored her completely, un-phased by her sounds echoing through the hall.
The thud of her fists on the wall soon began to fade as Blue pulled me further and further away from my room.
Reaching the stairs, he stopped and looked down at me over his shoulder. “Are you ready to walk on your own, or are you going to make me drag you down the stairs too?”
“Fuck you,” I said, my breathing heavy and fast paced as my eyes turned to slits.
“Fine, have it your way.” Blue started down the steps, my body dangling behind him.
I felt every step as my body bounced off it. My hips hit the hard edge, the small of back scraped the wood, forcing splinters into my skin.
Except, I didn't scream in pain, I stayed strong. Refusing to give him the satisfaction, forgoing the fucking sick pleasure he would get out of knowing he was hurting me.
You won't break me! I won't let you!
The screams remained in my head, replaced by action. I fought. I fought him just as I had fought every other man that had ever come for me.
Grunting and groaning, I did everything I could, not giving up on getting free. My fingers scratched and sliced at his wrist, my legs flailed, bucking with all the force I could. I had no idea what was going on, I had no clue why he had come to get me.
Yes you do.
He didn't have to tell me. Virgo knew what I had done, and it was time for me to pay for it. He was a man who loved games, and him forcing the anxiety to flow through my veins as I waited for my punishment was his playtime with me.
Reaching the bottom, Blue curled his free hand into my hair, and pulled me to my feet. “Time to walk, Berlin.” Slinking his fingers down my neck, he gripped me around my throat and pushed me forward.
We walked through the house, down a long hall that lead to the basement. I hated going down that hall, I hated the feeling that came over me when I got close to that door. It made my mind go back to that first night in the states when I was brought to Virgo's home.
Blindfolded with my hands tied, my poor nine year old self was petrified. I heard Virgo's voice first, a deep grunt that ricocheted through my skull like an ax splitting wood.
'What's this?' he asked as I felt him stalk around me like a shark circling its prey.
'This is the eldest child,' a man said.
'Why do you have her?'
'You wanted answers, April wasn't talking.'
'And?'
'And we did what you asked us to do.'
'So she's. . .'
'Yes, do I need to spell it out for you?' I heard a weighted breath, feeling the man beside me shift on his feet. 'But just so we're clear, I'm never doing that again. It's not what we do.'
'Don't worry, you'll be paid accordingly, you'll forget all about it when you're eating caviar and drinking gold. But, what about her father?' Virgo asked, softly lifting a lock of my hair and spinning it around his fingers.
'We still don't know where he is, but we'll find him.'
'You need to find the shit stain, Trent. That's all I want.' His voice was sharp, angry and upset. I felt him slide his hand underneath the crease of my arm, the tips of his fingers ice cold, sending a rush of chills down my spine. 'I'll take her, she might be useful.'
'Are you sure? Because I can take—'
'I told you, I'll take her.'
Leading me down a long flight of st
airs, I could see a sliver of the steps through a small crack in the bottom of my blindfold. Reaching the bottom, Virgo tore the cloth off, forcing the light to blind me.
Blinking hard, I tried to focus on where I was. There was a light bulb hanging from the center of the ceiling, dangling back and forth on a thin wire. It smelled musty, like wet clothes that had been left in the washer for days.
Virgo took a step back, his smile thick and coy as he tilted his head and examined me. His fingers ran through my hair, gripping my chin and tipping it up to look at my face. His eyes studied every detail, but he didn't say a word.
'Do you know where your father is, little girl?' I had no words, shaking my head no to answer him. 'Are you sure about that?' he asked, arching a brow.
It felt like I couldn't find my voice. There was no air in my lungs to make a sound, no saliva on my tongue to wet my lips. So I shook my head no again.
'No? Well, let's make this a little easier for you. I know I'm a stranger, so how about I tell you my name, this way I'm not a stranger anymore.' His lips lifted higher as he crossed his arms over his chest. 'I'm Virgo.'
'Where am I?' I finally asked, my voice weak and frail as I spoke. I could feel the tears as they welled up, bubbling over the surface. Blinking once, the large drops fell down my cheeks one after the other. 'Where are my brother and sister?'
'Don't cry, sweet child, your tears will get you nothing here.' Running a thumb beneath my eye, he dipped down so we were face to face. 'I don't know anything about your brother and sister, but what I do know is that you're home now, sweet girl.'
The way he said it made me cry harder. The pit in my stomach exploded into dry heaves as I gagged between breaths. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't think, I couldn't run away.
I was trapped in a place that was unfamiliar with a man who scared me to death. A man who would make me the center of his fucked up existence, training me for a future that felt more like being strangled than being alive.
And that feeling, it stayed with me. Every time I was near the basement, or he threw me in the ditch, that feeling would come back. It made me sick, it made me hate him over and over again.
Blue stopped short, knocking on one of the doors. There was movement inside, I could hear rustling and the sound of someone walking around. My heart was beating in my throat and my chest was swelling like a hot air balloon.
The door opened slowly, exposing a sweaty and flushed Virgo. Buttoning up his shirt, he glanced between Blue and myself. “Is it time?” he asked, running his fingers through his hair to fix it.
“You said he would be here at eleven, it's ten of.”
“Mm,” Virgo grunted, checking his watch. “Well, perfect timing then. I'm done here anyway.” Looking over his shoulder, he spoke to someone else. “Now you're ready.” His eyes moved back to me, his smile bold and sinister. “Give the new girl a nice smile, Berlin, she's just been inducted as one of our own.”
Virgo turned sideways, allowing me to see inside. There was a young girl curled up in a ball on the bed, her tears fresh and streaming down her cheeks like roaring rapids. Her gaze was wide and full of sadness as our eyes connected.
Another one. Another poor girl who will have to suffer until she is bought or worse.
This was his ritual, it was how he showed his power and authority, letting you know he was in charge. Virgo always had the first turn with a new girl. He got her before anyone else, and he liked to joke at times about the men in club getting his sloppy seconds.
It made me sick, it filled me with so much disgust, and my experience was no different than hers. Except I fought. I fought and I didn't stop fighting until everything went black.
And I was thankful for that.
But the memory of what happened before everything shut down, burned me from the inside out. I felt so disgusting after, so violated and ruined.
Shadowed fingers traced my shoulder, causing me to look at my arm. Flashes of that night began to pop into my head, taking me back in time, to that single moment where a monster stole my innocence.
* * * *
'You know what day it is, my sweet child?' Virgo asked, gently closing the basement door. 'It's your birthday, the day I took you in, the day I decided you belonged to me.'
'It's not my birthday, my birthday—'
Cutting me off, Virgo laughed out loud. 'When will you learn, Berlin? Your life before doesn't exist, not anymore. You were nine when you came into my hands, a small frightened girl, so lost and alone. Today you're eighteen, you're. . .' Pausing, his smile glistened with excitement as if he had been waiting for this day for years. 'A woman,' he finally said as his feet hit the basement floor.
Climbing off my cot, I kept my eyes on him as I walked backwards. 'What's your point?' I asked, trying to search around in the dimly lit room for anything I could use as protection.
He had gloated about this day for the last two years, talking about it like it was Genesis, a day of reckoning, as if a whole new world was about to open up. I guess I could thank that man, Machi, for allowing me to keep my virginity for this long.
His threat was heard, it was enforced, it was the only time I had seen Virgo show a hint of fear.
'How many times have I warned you about that attitude?' Virgo took gingerly steps in my direction, slowly unbuttoning his shirt with each stride. 'Today things change, today you start your new beginning.'
'Stop right there!' I yelled, knowing exactly what he meant. 'Stay away from me!'
'Or what?' he asked, his smile thickening as moved like a snake across the floor. He stepped with power, making it clear that what I wanted didn't matter. 'You've known this day was coming, stop acting like a fucking bitch.'
Moving against the back wall, I felt around with my hands, praying that something would jump out for me to grab. 'I'm warning you, don't come any closer!'
His chuckle sent shivers down my spine as his eyes twinkled in the shadows. 'The more you fight, the more it's going to hurt.'
'I don't care, I won't let you fucking touch me. You'll never fucking touch me. I've done what you asked. I've been quiet, I've followed the rules, but this! I won't let you!'
Stopping a few feet away, he gripped his belt and unbuckled it, pulling it out of the loops with ease. 'You're being very disrespectful right now, I don't like it.' Folding the belt over his hand, he clutched it firmly. 'Come here.'
'No!'
'I won't tell you again.'
'Fuck you!'
'I warned you about that, you sound like a cheap whore. And cheap whores get punished for talking with filthy mouths.' Throwing his arm out, he whipped me across the top of my thighs with the leather belt.
I felt the material first, then the stabbing burn that radiated over my skin. The welt began to swell instantly, but he just kept coming.
Strike after strike, Virgo slapped my bare legs. Each lashing the skin turned red and raw, and I could feel warm blood trickling down my calves.
Moving against the wall, I tried to cover my body the best I could. My eyes kept scanning, looking for anything I could use as weapon. With my back to the old brick wall, I turned around, squishing my chest into the rock as he continued to hit me.
Pressing my palms into the wall, I felt a brick as it moved loosely in place. I didn't have to think about it, my brain knew what to do instantly. Working the small stone free, I gripped it in my palm.
'Stop! Just stop!' I screamed, jerking my body around quickly and chucking the brick blindly in his direction.
'Fuck!' Virgo yelled, dropping his belt to the ground and grabbing his face.
I stood stunned, unsure if he was screwing with me to make me drop my guard, or if I had actually hit him.
Pulling his hand away, blood was spilling from a wound under his eye. 'You little fucking bitch.' Grinding his teeth, he glared at me.
'Kill me! Go on, just kill me already! I can't live like this!'
Growling, Virgo charged forward, curling both his hands around my throat before
I could even react. 'Kill you?' Whispering through his teeth, his eyes turned to ice. 'Killing you would be too easy, I'm going to make your life living hell.'
The air thinned, the room swayed, growing fuzzy and purple as he kept squeezing. Raking my fingers over his wrists, I tried to pull him off, but it didn't work.
The look in his eyes was terrifying. There was nothing there. No emotion, no care, no love. All I saw was control.
The room slowly began to fade, and for a moment I was actually happy. I thought I was leaving for good, I thought I was going to see my mother again.
I thought I was going to be free. . .
I was none of those things.
Opening my eyes, I was laying in my bed, with the old blanket pulled up to my chin. My body hurt all over, my throat was sore and scratchy, but I wasn't dead.
Sitting up, I felt different. It was a feeling I couldn't explain, but one that a girl just knows deep inside her being.
Removing the blankets from my lap, a small pool of blood was on the sheet between my legs. Leaning my head over the side of the bed, I threw up all over the floor.
He had done the unthinkable. He had taken me without permission. He had taken me while I was unconscious and couldn't fight.
He was a fucking monster.
And that was when I knew I had been captured by pure evil.
* * * *
Virgo chuckled, drawing me back into reality as he looked between the frightened girl and myself. “This is Blue, he's going to show you to your room. Don't forget what I told you, listening keeps you safe, fighting gets you hurt.” Winking at the girl, Virgo let Blue pass by. Holding out his arm for me to take, he said, “You've seen better days. I take it you weren't too happy to see Blue at your door.” His laugh sent chills up my spine as he glanced over my new bruises and open cuts. Wriggling his arm, he let out an annoyed sigh. “Come on, I don't have all day.”
“What's going on?” I asked, nervously fiddling with my hands, reluctant to place my arm in his. “Why do you need me right now?”
