by Gemma Rogers
‘Well, what else has been going on?’ he asked, his foot tapping in a slow, steady rhythm. He waited expectantly as I gathered my thoughts.
I began to babble, telling him about my change of address and how I was now caring for my mother. He suggested looking on the internet to see if we could claim any financial aid from the government, although I was sure Helen would be up to date with that.
‘Are you okay, Barry?’ I asked as the meeting came to a close, unable to stand the atmosphere any longer.
He ran his tongue across his teeth, the simple act seemed menacing. Picking up his pen from the table and twirling it in his fingers, he spoke. ‘I’m being let go. Someone has reported me to my employer. It’s been suggested I take bribes and rough up the girls. Some would go so far as to say trafficking.’ An icy smile grew on his lips and I shivered.
64
My knee shook, and I briefly considered making a run for it, but Barry’s eyes held me frozen.
‘You look like a rabbit about to get flattened by my BMW.’
I swallowed, my mouth filling with saliva as he sneered.
‘So, what do you know, Jess? Was it you telling tales?’
‘I’m sorry, Barry, but I have no idea what you’re talking about. I haven’t contacted your employer.’ My voice came out in a squeak, like a mouse, and I gritted my teeth.
‘No, I didn’t think so. It’s safe to say we both know who did though. I’m looking forward to seeing that raggedy little bitch today. I trust she’ll put in an appearance.’ His jaw clenched and I stood, my lungs in a vice unable to take a breath. ‘I hope you girls know what you’ve let yourselves in for, because, if you didn’t know, I’m one of the nice ones,’ Barry mocked as I left.
Who had told the rehabilitation company? I didn’t even remember which one he worked for. I only remember Barry telling me they were contracted by the Probation Service. How on earth had Karla fitted in snitching on him with everything else going on? Like Barry, I couldn’t imagine it being anyone else, though. Maybe she had her own list that she was ticking off before leaving? Either way, I was lighter knowing I wouldn’t have to meet with Barry again. I hated the slimy ginger prick. Without Barry, Terry would never have had access to us. He was an enabler to the worst kind of man.
I headed outside to the yard for a cigarette, calculating in my head the number of meetings I’d have to endure with whoever turned up next week. I’d toe the line, play by the rules and keep my head down. I hadn’t forgotten Karla and I had pretty much got away with disposing of Terry. Detective Wimslow hadn’t been back, nosing around and he said himself their leads had dried up. The pressure had eased and it seemed they were more interested in Terry’s crimes against women, perhaps assuming that was why he’d done a runner. Whatever their theories, they couldn’t prove anything and without a body, the case would remain a missing person.
Soaking up the vitamin D as I leaned against the wire fence, I composed a text to Helen. I reasoned there was no point in staying pissed off and wrote I hoped she’d had a great first night at the Helen and Stuart love nest, and that Mum was fine this morning. I knew she’d appreciate my sarcasm like no one else.
Barry came out to smoke, thankfully staying the other side of the yard as he was on the phone. I took the opportunity to send a message to Karla, to warn her Barry was on the warpath. Dan knew she might be late and as I’d told him she’d need to leave today, I didn’t think he was counting on her working a shift. Thankfully since the towels, nothing else had come in and it looked to be a slow day.
Hanna, Laura, Natalia and Agnes were standing around station five, by the pressing machines, deep in conversation when I went back in. It sounded as though Hanna was trying to teach them some Slovakian swear words. I waved as I went past, wanting to find Dan. It would be lunchtime soon and I wanted to catch him before I went to the café. He was in his office, squinting at his monitor, a can of Coke at his lips. I watched him for a few seconds before he looked up and saw me approach, waving me in.
‘Hey,’ he said, his smile wide and infectious, making the lines around his eyes crinkle.
‘Hi.’ I walked around to his side of the desk and perched on the corner, leaning to brush my lips on his.
I had the urge to straddle him as I recalled the image of him in his overalls from last night. ‘No overalls today?’
‘Didn’t think they were suitable for the office.’ He laughed, reaching up to weave his hand into my hair and pull me in for a longer kiss. The stirring in my stomach making me wish we were somewhere more private. ‘Right, enough of that, I’ve got work to do. Oh, have you seen Karla yet? I’m going to put an advert on Indeed for her replacement once I’ve spoken to her.’
‘No, not yet,’ I replied.
‘I’m here,’ came a voice from behind us, and I turned to see Karla looking smaller than ever in the doorway.
‘Are you okay? How’s John?’ I asked, jumping up.
‘He’s stable, that’s the main thing. They brought him round, the swelling on the brain has come right down. When he woke up, he told me to go.’
Karla looked on the brink of tears and I led her to the chair in front of Dan’s desk and sat her down.
‘You look like shit. Have you eaten anything? Do you want a cup of tea?’
‘Coffee, if you’re making,’ she replied, rubbing her eyes.
Dan moved his monitor around so Karla could see the screen.
‘This is the place we’ve found.’ He tapped his keyboard. I hurried to the kitchen to make a strong coffee, relieved the photos were still up when I returned.
‘It looks perfect,’ I said to Karla, leaning over to look at the photos.
Dan told her the monthly rent; Natasha had reduced it as a favour. As long as Karla could find work, she’d be able to afford it. With the leftover money after paying Leon, she had enough to keep her going.
‘And I can move in today?’ She seemed in shock as Dan and I both nodded vigorously. Karla clapped her hands over her mouth and tears filled her eyes. She was much changed from the girl I’d met three months ago. The streetwise firecracker who wouldn’t take any shit from anyone. Karla looked tired, worn out and ready to collapse, her already tiny frame appeared fragile with the pounds she’d lost in the past two weeks. I worried she’d drop from the stress of it all.
Dan and I beamed at each other, both of us knowing we’d helped in our small way, that in a matter of hours Karla would be living another life. It hadn’t got past me that Dan had no idea what Karla had been involved with; he’d sought out Natasha and arranged the rental on the boathouse all because I’d asked him to. Trusting my word was enough. My chest swelled and I squeezed his shoulder. Pulling my phone from my pocket, I noticed I had a missed call from Helen. I’d ring her back, swiping instead to Google Maps and typing in Middleton-on-Sea.
‘Is it far enough away? It’s only an hour and a half.’
‘It’ll be fine,’ Karla said, looking at her own phone. ‘It’s a train to Bognor and a short bus ride apparently,’ she added, and I noticed her duffel bag at her feet. She was packed and ready to go.
The office fell quiet for a second, the atmosphere serious.
‘Try not to miss me too much.’ Karla’s mouth twitched and for a second the girl was back, filling the room with her exuberant personality. The spark not quite extinguished from her eyes.
‘Believe me, I won’t. You’re a pain in the arse!’ I replied, pulling her to her feet. I hugged her, the exchange feeling awkward and although she stiffened initially, she wrapped her arms around me and squeezed me tight.
‘Right, let’s get you out of here before Barry sees you.’
65
We all left the office, exiting Bright’s by the front door, the sun glaring down at us. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky, and I raised my face to bathe in it. A vibration came from my back pocket – Helen again, checking up on Mum. Jesus, she was relentless! Why move out if she was going to call every five minutes? I’d ring her bac
k once Karla was safely on her way to the station.
‘Can I give you a lift?’ Dan offered.
‘Nah, it’s fine. I can get the bus; the train isn’t until two thirty. There’s plenty of time.’
‘And you’ll be okay? You have enough money?’ I asked.
‘Yes, Mum!’ Karla smirked and I tutted.
‘Natasha will meet you at the property at five, that’ll give you plenty of time to get there, but here’s her number and the boathouse details.’ Dan handed Karla a printout of what we’d viewed online, including the address and telephone number.
She took it, nodding, and folded it, slipping it into her duffel bag.
‘Thank you, for everything.’ She looked from me to Dan, and back again. The sincerest I’d ever seen her.
I bit down on my lip; it wasn’t the time to joke about what a nightmare she’d been ever since I’d met her. All the dodgy dealings, the backstabbing, lies and hatred between us now pushed aside. I’d never be able to make up for killing Eddie and I owed her for coming to my rescue with Terry. Even if she did have an ulterior motive at the time. Hopefully now the scales were even.
We stood awkwardly, as though no one wanted to be the first to say goodbye. Dan scuffed the kerb with his shoe, and I chewed my nail. My phone buzzed again. Scowling, I pulled it from my pocket. This time it was a text from Helen.
Ring me. Urgent
My heart lurched as I swiped to call her back. What was so urgent? Shit, why hadn’t I bloody answered the phone?
My stomach flipped like I was on a coaster as I waited for Helen to pick up, then I saw Karla’s face pale.
‘Fuck,’ she breathed, and her eyes closed for a second. Before I could turn around to see what was behind me, a voice boomed over the noise of the traffic.
‘Finally decided to show up, have you?’ Barry strode over, his eyes wild, rubbing his hands together.
I ended the call as Helen picked up. It would have to wait; I knew Barry wanted to tear Karla limb from limb.
‘Hi, Barry,’ Karla said flatly, her face giving away the annoyance at his interruption.
‘Little smoking break, is it?’ He lit a cigarette and glanced around at each of us, waiting for a response that never came.
I followed suit, pulling a cigarette from the pack in my back pocket and handing one to Karla.
‘Well, this is nice,’ Barry said, glaring at us.
Dan and I exchanged a look, in which I tried to convey I wanted him to stay. However, he must have misread my signal because with a slight nod of the head towards Bright’s, he said: ‘I better get back. See you later, Karla, take care, okay,’ and he was gone.
Alone with Barry, who looked like a boxer gearing up for a fight, my heart hammered in my chest, making my ears buzz.
He looked from me to Karla and back again. ‘You know I’ve been wondering what’s going on between you two? Why Karla was so keen for me to be your rehabilitation officer, Jess. I had to pull in a few favours of course. I don’t normally cover new releases from HMP Bronzefield. Why was she so eager to have you working at Bright’s?’ Barry paused, waiting for an answer, his eyes narrowing when none came.
Karla and I exchanged looks. I’d guessed when I found out she was Eddie’s sister that she might have been keeping an eye on my release date, that much was obvious, but she’d managed to engineer me coming to Bright’s? What had she promised Barry to make that happen? I closed my eyes. It was in the past now, but it still burnt to know how intent she’d been on ruining my life.
‘At first, I thought you two might have been friends, that’s what she told me, but after seeing you at each other’s throats I realised that wasn’t the case. It must be important; she paid in kind after all,’ Barry sneered, and I felt my throat close up.
Karla looked at the floor, her skin pasty, like she was about to throw up.
Barry stepped towards Karla, blowing smoke out of his nostrils. ‘Well come on, I can’t just go without solving the mystery, not now you’ve got me the fucking sack.’ His booming voice reverberated through me. He looked deranged, eyes dark and malicious. A loose cannon and I had no idea how far he’d go.
It didn’t matter now, whatever Karla had done, however I’d ended up at Bright’s. Things had changed; Terry had gone and Karla and I had made our peace as best we could.
‘Karla’s just leaving,’ I said, taking a protective step towards her.
‘She’s not going anywhere,’ Barry countered, reaching out and grabbing a hold of Karla’s wrist before she could turn.
It all happened so fast. I lunged at Barry, to try and loosen his grip on Karla’s arm. She tried to twist away, shouting at him to let her go. We were all so caught up in the moment, the three of us tugging at each other, that none of us saw the black 4x4 mount the kerb. There was no time to move or even a chance to react as it ploughed into us all.
Barry was tossed up in the air like a rag doll, taking the brunt, as I bounced on top of the bonnet. The car sprawled us out like bowling pins across the pavement before speeding away. I landed awkwardly, searing pain, like I’d never experienced, shot up my arm and shoulder as I skidded across the concrete, smashing my head on the bin. I stayed conscious long enough to see Barry hit the deck, his eyes wide with shock as he face-planted the pavement, his limbs at awkward angles, before the world went dark.
Blinking away sleep, I struggled to regain focus beneath the bright lights. Helen leaned over me, her face tear-stained, and a tissue she’d been twisting wrapped around her finger. For a second, I thought I was dead, my head throbbed and I had a dull ache along my right side.
‘Karla?’ I asked, throat stinging. I hadn’t seen Karla after the car ploughed into us, had she been flung into the road?
‘She’s fine, been discharged. She had a mild concussion. The other guy who was with you, he’s in intensive care, fractured skull.’
‘Where’s Dan?’ I tried to sit, and Helen flapped, getting me to lay down again. Why was she crying? Had I been badly hurt? Lifting my head, I tried to look at myself, but my eyes wouldn’t focus. The beeping machines sped up as I tried to untangle myself from the wires.
‘Jess, stop, you’re fine. A broken arm that’s all, maybe concussion but otherwise okay. They’ve operated on you already; you’ve got a pin in your arm and you’ll have to wear a cast for six weeks.’
I tried to lift it, the cast heavy on my arm, but I had no strength.
‘I’ve got something to tell you.’ Helen’s chin wobbled, like it always did when she was upset. The memory of missing her calls flashed into my mind.
‘Mum?’
She nodded slowly. ‘When Grace arrived, Mum had brought all her pills down from the bathroom and taken every single one. They told me she would have been unconscious when she passed, her heart simply stopped.’
I let out a half sob, half howl and tears came in an avalanche.
Helen lowered her head and reached out for my hand, gripping my fingers as we cried together. It was my fault, my first day caring for Mum and I’d failed her.
‘She left a note, explaining she didn’t want us looking after her. She missed her independence and didn’t want us to waste our lives. Apparently, she was happy to go.’ Helen heaved, great wracking sobs which made her entire body shake.
‘I’m so sorry,’ I said, my words seeming weak, unable to even scratch the surface of our grief.
We cried together for a while and, worn out, sat in silence as I stared listlessly up at the ceiling tiles and ultraviolet lights. The machine attached to me had returned to a rhythmic monotonous beep.
‘Where’s Dan?’ I asked again. Why wasn’t he here? What time was it?
‘He was here before you went for your op. He’ll be back soon.’
‘What time is it?’
‘Eleven?’
My mouth gaped, eleven at night! ‘Helen, go home. I’m okay. You must be exhausted. Where’s Stuart?’
‘He’s outside.’ Helen let go of my hand and stood, brus
hing my hair away from my face. ‘I am tired,’ she admitted. ‘I’ll come back in the morning, soon as I can.’ She smiled at me, her eyes awash with pain. I smiled back and watched as what was left of my family walked out the door.
66
It was surprisingly easy to drift back into sleep. Anaesthetic was an amazing thing, although I woke again hours later, the lights now dim, with the driest mouth I’d ever had. It took me a few minutes before I noticed a sleeping Dan, curled up in the chair Helen had sat in, his jacket over him like a blanket.
‘Hey,’ I croaked, and he opened his eyes straight away, jumping up. I pointed to the water jug on the bedside table and he filled a plastic cup. I drank it in one go and nodded again for more.
‘How are you feeling?’ he asked, his face a mask of concern.
‘Okay.’
‘I’m so sorry about your mum, Jess.’
As soon as he mentioned Mum, my eyes filled again. He dabbed at them with a tissue and stroked my hair, kissing my forehead every so often until I stopped crying.
‘Where’s Karla?’
‘She’s fine. After the accident, you and Barry were taken in an ambulance, but Karla barely had a scratch, amazingly she got up and brushed herself off. The paramedics wanted her to go and get checked over in case of concussion, so I drove her to the hospital. There were loads of witnesses to the incident, other drivers and pedestrians, they got the number plate. Leon’s been arrested already.’
‘How do you know about Leon?’
‘Once she was discharged, Karla and I had a long drive down to Middleton-on-Sea,’ he said by way of explanation. ‘She told me everything. I had no idea what she was mixed up in.’
My teeth clamped together, surely he didn’t mean everything. She wouldn’t have told him about Terry, would she? ‘Everything?’
‘Leon, Eddie, the drugs. How many years she’d spent hating you.’
I coughed and Dan let me have another drink before continuing.
