by C J Murphy
“Sam?”
The blond-headed man looked confused at first before he went wide eyed with recognition. “Noeul Scott! Oh my God.” Sam stepped out of the elevator and wrapped her in a gentle, warm embrace.
She sunk into his arms, as she drew strength from a man she should have been consoling. Instead, it was the other way around and she soaked it up. After a few moments, she held him at arm’s length. “Sam, how is Max?”
Sam’s bright albeit tired smile told the story and alleviated one of her greater fears.
“It seems he’s come out the other side of this. The doctors say they’ll send him home tomorrow if all goes as planned. I was running out for more coffee. I hate the garbage they serve here. I’m pretty sure that’s all that’s keeping me upright, that and the nap and shower I got in when Jordan stayed with him last night.”
The sound of the one name she was desperate to hear perked Noeul up. “Uhm, Sam, is Jordan still here?” The way Sam’s face pinched told her she wouldn’t get the answer she’d hoped for.
“I sent her home about forty-five minutes ago. She came straight here when she got off the plane and wouldn’t leave. She let me go home to rest and shower and stayed until Max told her to go home because she smelled like a horse.”
Noeul tried to cover a grin with her hand. “Oh, that’s probably because she had to ride Thor down the mountain to meet her transportation to the airport. We’re a far cry from what most would consider the civilized world at Topside.”
Sam threaded his arm through Noeul’s and punched the elevator button. “She hadn’t left since the moment she walked through those doors. Good Lord, I had to threaten her to get her to go home for a bit. Come on. Max will want to see you, and Jordan will be back in about an hour. I tried to get her to stay home and sleep.” He shook his head. “Stubborn soul insists she’s coming right back.”
Noeul closed her eyes and breathed a sigh of relief. If she stayed where she was, Jordan would find her this time. “I’d like to see Max.” She hesitated, not wanting to cause Sam more pain. “Do you think he’ll remember me? Jordan’s told me about his condition.”
Sam held up one hand, palm up. “Only one way to tell. He remembers the past much better than simple things like what he had for lunch. I don’t understand it all. It has to do with the difference between long-term and short-term memory. Jordan’s been talking to him about you, so I won’t be surprised if he does. If not, try to let it roll off your back. It’s not intentional.” Sam closed his eyes and sighed.
“Don’t worry, if he doesn’t, we’ll make friends all over again,” Noeul assured him.
“Thank you. It’s hard at times. He is such an incredible man, and I’m losing parts of him day by day. I dread the day he doesn’t remember me.”
“I don’t think that will happen until much later, Sam. Love is the strongest memory and our greatest bond.”
Sam tipped his head at her as they stepped off the elevator. “I keep telling myself that. How about you? It can’t be easy being back here, although I imagine your reason for coming overshadows that some, yeah?”
Noeul felt the heat creep up her neck. “I had a small panic attack on the way here from the airport. I kept thinking that who I was coming for was a stronger pull than the memory of what once was.”
“And here you are. Don’t worry, Jordan will be back soon. Until then, visit with Max. Hopefully it will do you both some good.”
Noeul’s smile felt genuine as they walked into the room. Max still looked very much as he had the last time she’d seen him all those years ago. He was so handsome, with his gray hair and clear blue eyes. She waited to let Sam make the introduction.
“Max, look who’s popped in to see you. It’s Noeul, Noeul Scott.” Sam reached out his hand and brought Noeul closer to the bed.
Max’s smile gave Noeul a second of hope that he indeed might recognize her.
“Oh, I don’t know about that.” Max furrowed his brow.
Noeul’s heart sank at Sam’s deflated countenance and at what she thought was Max’s inability to remember her.
“I’d say she came here for an entirely different reason than to see an old codger like me.” Max squinted and grinned. “I’d say it was more our daughter, Jordan—as you told the doctor, my dear husband—that she’s popped in to see.”
Sam’s laughter mixed with the tears streaming down his face and eased the lump in Noeul’s throat, as she watched him lean up to kiss Max. Sam reached out a hand and drew her up beside him.
Max reached out and took her hand in his. He kissed it and let it rest on the bed. “My dear, Noeul, you grow ever lovelier. I dare say the mountain air has restorative properties. Have you found the fountain of youth up there in that rare air?”
“Hi, Max. It’s good to see you. I wish it was under better circumstances.” Noeul leaned up and kissed his cheek.
“Take my word for it, getting old sucks, as does dementia. Be glad we made friends twenty years ago, though it doesn’t feel that long ago. It’s wonderful to see you and opportunistic that you’ve found me on a day when I know who the hell I am.”
Sam smiled. “I’m going to go get that coffee before my caffeine meter runs out. Can I get one for you, my dear?”
Noeul quirked a grin as she turned to Max. “Yes, that’d be wonderful. I’ll sit and catch up here with this smooth talker while you’re gone.”
Sam leaned in past Noeul and kissed Max once again. “Don’t go getting yourself into trouble while I’m gone.”
“And how could I do that when I’m tethered to this hospital bed by a spider web of wires and tubes? Run along and come back to me.” Max raised a shaky hand to cup Sam’s face.
“I’ll never be far away, my love.” With that, Sam exited and Max patted the side of the bed, indicating for Noeul to sit down.
“I’ll sit in this chair beside you.”
Max eyed her. “No, I want you to sit right here beside me, so I can hold your hand and look into those beautiful green eyes, so much like your father’s. I miss my old friends. To see you here would scare me into thinking I was on death’s door, if it weren’t for knowing the true reason you left your sanctuary.”
Noeul sat down on the elevated bed, struggling to get there with her short stature. Once she did, she took Max’s frail hand in hers.
“Now, as much as I would love to walk down memory lane, I never know when I’m going to have lucid moments like now. My thoughts are clearer right now than in a very long time, and it’s important I say a few things to you, while my much younger husband runs down to Café Kôfē to appease his refined coffee addiction. Noeul, I want you to listen to me until I’m done.”
Noeul laughed and shook her head. “Okay, I’m listening.”
“I hope you are, my friend, because I’m going to tell you a story about a young man, a very persistent young man. He was a successful chef and had every red-blooded gay man drooling at his feet, all except one extremely pigheaded mathematics professor. The chef created special dishes, dropped off pastries at the professor’s office, and even managed to be in the right place at the right time on numerous occasions. The stubborn professor felt he was too old for the chef. You see, the handsome young chef, was twenty years younger than the professor. What could they possibly have in common, and what the hell could a charming young man with his pick of the litter want with a fifty-two-year-old professor, who reveled in numbers and formulas?”
Noeul started to shake her head. “I think I know where this story is going, Max, and I…”
“Has living alone all these years affected your ability to follow directions my dear, Noeul?” Max chastised.
Noeul bit her lip and pretended to lock it shut.
Max pushed back into his pillow. “That’s better. The dashing young chef never gave up. He explained to the stubborn old man that age was relative and that it wasn’t the quantity of years they could have together that mattered. What did matter was the quality. He explained that, as a chef,
he could turn out mass-production meals that lacked flavor and distinction. Instead, he’d chosen to do a smaller menu full of dishes that were memorable. That chef has been my husband for the last twenty years, because he chose a life that might never set a longevity record by any means. What it certainly would not lack was substance or memorable experiences.”
Max took a few minutes and rested while the silence hung between them. “Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on how you look at it, our life together has been shorter than we’d hoped for. I’ve had the perfect partner, and most of the memories we’ve made stay with me. Sam has repeatedly assured me I haven’t forgotten a moment of our time together. I believe the reason is because the quality of the time we’ve had far outweighs the span. Twenty years is nothing to scoff at, I know. What I can say, without a doubt, is that I’d give him forty more if I could.” Max stopped and closed his eyes.
Noeul grew worried. “Are you okay, Max?”
Max smiled at her again. “Yes, dear, I’m gathering my thoughts, or what’s left of them. I only regret one thing…that I waited the year I did. Don’t make my same mistake. Jordan loves you, that much I can assure you. She had her heart ripped out many years ago by someone who didn’t deserve her. You had yours ripped out by Aggie’s death. No one ever said life was fair. As I face my own mortality, I can tell you living is certainly better than the alternative. The only thing stopping you from having what I’ve been able to enjoy with my wonderful chef, is you. Don’t look back on this five, ten, fifteen years from now and ask what if. Look back and be grateful for what has been.”
Noeul felt a burning in her chest, igniting a fire that had been little more than warm ashes moments ago. Max’s words were exactly what she needed to hear. She leaned up and wrapped an arm around him and hugged him gently. She sat back down in the chair at his bedside and closed her eyes. “Now if I can convince Jordan.”
“Convince me of what?”
Noeul was afraid to open her eyes, afraid that the voice she’d heard was an illusion. Afraid that her lack of sleep in the last forty-eight hours had caused her to hallucinate. Could that voice belong to the one person she wanted to see more than any other? She clenched her eyes tightly closed and felt Max squeeze and release her hand. Another sensation passed through her body as a very warm hand cupped her cheek.
“Convince Jordan of what?”
The voice came again, the one Noeul hadn’t been able to get out of her thoughts. She opened her eyes and leaned into the touch. Dark eyes danced and darted from her own green ones to her lips. “Convince you to give me another chance to say I’m not only falling in love with you, I am in love with you.”
Warm sunshine crept across Jordan’s face and pierced the storm clouds. When it broke out into that full Kodak-moment smile, Noeul let her heart beat again.
Jordan leaned close, so close only a whisper could pass between them. “Say it again?”
This time, it was Noeul’s face that broke out in a wide smile. “I love you, Jordan Armstrong, for all you are and for the joy you’ve brought back into my life. For the first time in a very long time, I feel alive. And that is completely your fault. I love you so very much.” Noeul punctuated her words with a brush of her lips against Jordan’s, leading to a much deeper and more passionate kiss.
When a throat cleared, Noeul smiled and turned to Max. “What? You said don’t look back on the what if. You said revel in what is. Excuse me for following your instructions, Professor.”
“I think she’s got you there, Max. How about we take this someplace a little more private?”
Noeul felt Jordan lean into her and whisper along her jawline. Words felt more clearly than heard made her body shiver and her center pulse.
“I love you too, and I want to feel you in my arms with nothing between us.” Jordan kissed her again.
Noeul felt herself being pulled to her feet and wrapped up in strong arms. She pressed her face into the warm chest in front of her and luxuriated in the smells so uniquely Jordan, rich earth and sunshine. Not close enough, she wanted to crawl inside Jordan’s skin to feel her everywhere. Before she could get lost in the sensation completely, she loosened her grip and turned to Max. She leaned over, kissed his cheek, and whispered, “Thank you, my friend, for making me see exactly what I would be missing out on.”
Max looked up to her and to Jordan, as Sam came to his side. “Be good to each other. Love and cherish every moment.”
“You two get out of here before you cause a scene ripping each other’s clothes off. I seem to remember someone has an apartment above ours and nobody other than Bandit is home.”
Noeul blushed, as Sam winked at her when he leaned over and hugged them both. She looked back to Jordan and slid her arm around her. “I think we have our marching orders.”
***
Jordan kissed the top of her head and stepped over to hug Sam, before she came to Max’s side. When she leaned down, she looked directly into his eyes, trying to convey all the love and gratitude she could. Close to his ear, she whispered, “Thank you for whatever you said.”
Max looked back at her. “Remember, she came looking for you. I reminded her what’s possible when you get out of your own way. Be happy, Jordan, love’s a precious gift, and I don’t know anyone more deserving. Now go, take that woman home and remind her why she came.” He winked and embraced her before shoving her back and reaching for Sam’s hand.
Jordan stood and took Noeul back into her arms. “I love you both. I’ll check in on you later.”
Max scowled at her. “Unless you hear from the chef, all is well. Now go.”
“Yes, Dad.” Jordan winked at him and kissed Noeul’s head. “I think it’s time we go get reacquainted.”
Noeul looked up at her. “I’m all for that.”
Hand in hand, they made their way out of the hospital and down to Noeul’s rental. Jordan accepted the keys and held open the passenger door for the woman she had only imagined might be there with her. Before shutting the door, she leaned down and kissed Noeul soundly again, parting the soft lips and drawing out a small groan from the woman she loved.
“Jordan?” Noeul questioned.
Breathing hard, Jordan tried to answer. “What?”
“Get in this car and get me somewhere I can rip that shirt off you. Now.”
Jordan stood up so quickly, she hit her head on the roof of the car. She nearly knocked herself down, running around the front of the vehicle to stumble into the driver seat. The keys fell onto the floor, as she fumbled to get them into the ignition. Her hands trembled with need as she searched for the keys.
Noeul’s laugh filled the interior, and Jordan couldn’t help joining in with her. When she looked at the woman beside her, the smile she saw was so wide, it reminded her of a child being allowed to stomp in a storm puddle. Pure joy was all she could see, and she wanted more of it. The key found its way into the ignition, and they were off to give in to the growing desire forty-eight hours apart had created.
Fifteen minutes later, they drove up to the house, and Jordan pulled Noeul from the car and up the stairs. Bandit danced around them at the threshold. Jordan sent him outside and pinned Noeul against the door, attacking her mouth with need and passion. Her tongue was met stroke for stroke, and she felt Noeul fumble with the buttons on her shirt. Impatience sent the small pieces of plastic bouncing off the hardwood floor, as Noeul ripped fabric away from sensitive breasts. Warm lips covered Jordan’s nipple, nearly dropping her to her knees.
Jordan scooped Noeul up in her arms, carried her to the bedroom, and laid her on the soft comforter. “Trust me, I want you so much. I prefer it to be in my bed and not there in my kitchen. Well, at least not the first time.” She covered Noeul’s body with her own and drove her knee between the smaller woman’s legs, eliciting a deep groan. She kissed down Noeul’s slender neck until her lips met fabric. She pulled Noeul up and stripped the shirt over her head, throwing it to the floor, as she moved in to taste the skin now ex
posed.
Their heated kisses were interrupted only long enough to remove some piece of meddlesome clothing. Noeul’s hands were pulling off the rest of the opened shirt that still hung on broad shoulders and started on the buttons of Jordan’s jeans. “God, I missed you. I’m so sorry.”
“Shh, don’t talk.”
Jordan kicked off the final leg of her jeans and pulled on the hem of Noeul’s pants legs, stripping them off until a pile of denim lay on the floor. She could smell Noeul’s arousal and buried her face at the apex of the thighs below her. Jordan wanted to taste her, feel her, drink her in. Noeul’s hips were bucking under her touch, and she took advantage of the rise and fall to pull off the red lace bikinis that covered her final destination. When she’d removed the last piece of fabric, she sat up long enough to let her eyes consume the beautiful body that lay across her bed. She watched Noeul’s chest rise and fall in deep gasps. Hands reached for her, pulling her up, until once again her body covered the woman she loved. Yes, I do. I love her with everything I am. Jordan shuddered with the arousal coursing through her body.
Noeul’s tongue snaked up her neck and swirled around the curve of her ear. The sensation of Noeul sucking that earlobe into her mouth sent Jordan into overdrive, and she shifted her mouth until she met the warm, soft lips with intensity born of passion and desperate need. Tongues danced in and out, and hands searched for purchase.
Jordan felt blunt nails scrape over her shoulders and down her back, as their naked bodies slid along sweat-dampened skin. Jordan felt a searing heat around her breast, down her side, and across her back. The phoenix on her skin was being consumed by fire and reborn in the touch of the one woman for whom her desire could never be quenched.
