Roped In

by A. M. Arthur

  “So I guess you’re the foreman now,” Colt said. “As the next oldest.”

  “Yeah, I got the position two years ago,” Brand replied, smugness in his voice now. “I admit, I was pissed at you for giving me that responsibility at first, because I wanted to go to college, maybe be a teacher. But I got a business degree instead, and it’s really helped us here at the ranch.”

  “That’s great.” Colt silently cheered his brother’s success.

  “So what do you do? You used to talk about being a cop when Father wasn’t listening. That happen?”

  “It did. Took a few years, but I made it to the police academy. Even worked all the way up to SWAT, before I needed a change. Now I’m a handyman at a dude ranch and horse rescue in northern California. Got some great friends up there, too.”

  “That’s cool. Is it like a working dude ranch?”

  “Yup.” Colt nattered on about his second favorite topic in the world: Clean Slate Ranch. His favorite topic was Avery, but it was safer to stick to work for now, until he’d properly sussed out his brother’s thoughts on the situation. He also mentioned the ghost town attraction opening, if all went well, in the beginning of April. “I know it’s a long way, but y’all are obviously invited to opening day.”

  “I’ll keep that in mind.” Brand seemed interested in everything Colt was saying but he kept glancing at the main barn.

  “So where is everyone else?”

  “Rem and Dad are down on the north fence getting a trapped heifer out of the wire.”

  “Hell.” Colt had seen more than one tangled-up animal in his day. “Can they save her?”

  “Dunno, they haven’t radioed in for a while.”

  “How about Mom?”

  “In the house, probably starting on lunch.” Brand glanced at the three-story home. “You, uh, want to come in and say hi?”

  “I’d love that.” Colt’s heart jumped into his throat as he followed Brand to the familiar porch. Up three wide steps, Avery close behind him.

  Brand opened the wide, glass-paned door Colt had entered and exited hundreds of times during the first eighteen years of his life. Kitchen door, too, which led out to the patio and backyard. Colt was amazed at how little the house had changed in terms of furniture and decor. The only major change was the arrangement of family photos along the interior hallway leading to the kitchen. While Colt’s baby picture was still there near his siblings’, his high school graduation photo was not.

  It hurt, but he also understood. At least he hadn’t been completely erased from memory.

  “Hey, Mom,” Brand called down the hall. “We’ve got a surprise guest for lunch.”

  “We do?” Mom’s familiar, if somewhat more brittle voice floated toward him, and Colt swallowed back tears.

  Brand stepped into the sunny kitchen, and Colt followed. Mom stood near the sink with a towel in her hands, and the moment he appeared, she dropped it. Older, plumper, with more silver in her hair, she still looked exactly the same, down to her faded floral apron. “Oh, my word,” she said. “Colton, baby?”

  “Hi, Mom.”

  With a sharp cry, she launched herself across the room, and Colt barely had time to brace for the force of her hug. He held her close, unsurprised when tears rolled down his cheeks and she started shaking in his arms. Her own tears soaked the front of his shirt. “My boy, oh my boy,” she said, over and over.

  Colt held on until she let go and stood back to look him up and down. He wiped his own face on his sleeve, unsure what she saw. Brand and Avery were standing nearby, both of them obviously affected by the open display of emotions happening.

  “You look amazing,” Mom said. “Tan and healthy. Baby, where have you been?”

  “California. I lived in LA for a while, and now I work at a dude ranch near San Francisco.”

  “That’s quite a journey.” She finally seemed to notice Avery, and her smile slipped. “Hello. I’m Rose Woods.”

  “Avery Hendrix, ma’am.” Avery took her hand, and instead of shaking, raised it to kiss. “It’s a true pleasure to meet you.”

  The hand-kiss made Mom smile. “And how do you know Colton?”

  “They’re boyfriends,” Brand said. “How come you and Dad never told us Colton was gay?”

  “Because good folk don’t speak about such things.”

  Colt’s stomach churned; Avery frowned at her. The mood in the room downshifted from joyous to awkward.

  “I understand your hesitation in speaking about something that makes you uncomfortable,” Avery said, “but his sexuality is part of his life. You have an amazing son, Mrs. Woods. He’s kind, generous, loyal, and I’m honored to love him every single day.”

  She studied Avery a beat. “How do your parents feel about you loving a man?”

  “They support our relationship. My mother didn’t understand at first, but after she met Colt, she saw how we feel about each other, and now she’s on our side. You don’t have to understand something for it to be real, ma’am. I think I can speak for Colt in saying we’d both love your support, but we didn’t come here expecting to get it.”

  “Then why did you come here?”

  “Because you’re my mom,” Colt replied. “It’s been half a lifetime, and I needed to come back to see if I still have a place here, or if all my existing family is back in California. And I wanted you to know I’m happy, safe, and in love with the best man on the planet.”

  Mom’s eyes watered again. “Well, you’ve both come all this way, you might as well stay for lunch. I’m putting together leftover pot roast sandwiches, and there’s plenty to go around.”

  “Thank you, Mom.”

  “You boys have a seat at the table. I’ll get you some fresh lemonade.”

  Colt led Avery to the eat-in kitchen table, which was a U-shaped wooden built-in set into one corner near the entrance to the dining room. Avery scooted inside, Colt remaining a barrier between him and anyone else who might enter the room. Brand sat across from them, and Mom quickly delivered three frosty glasses of lemonade.

  “So how are LeAnne and Sage?” Colt asked.

  “Both happily married,” Brand replied with a grin. “LeAnne works at the grocery store in town, and her husband is Seth Miller’s oldest, and he works over in Daisy at the feed mill. They’ve got two kids and a third in the oven.”

  Seth Miller had been the mayor of Weston for most of Colt’s childhood, and he mostly remembered the man for having six sons with his wife. Colt tried to imagine his cherub-cheeked little sister married, a mom, and pregnant again. Even having seen some photos online, it didn’t compute.

  “Sage married a guy from Daisy,” Brand continued, “and they live there with their three kids, plus one from his previous marriage. He’s a good guy, hard worker.”

  “Good, I’m glad to hear it. I don’t suppose you have pictures of their kids?”

  Brand grinned. “Sure do.”

  They were going through Brand’s copious photos of his nieces and nephews when the kitchen door squealed open. Colt froze, his heart in his throat, as his father entered the kitchen, followed by his youngest brother Rem.

  Showtime.

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  Father and Rem both muttered greetings to Mom as they removed their hats, and Colt braced himself. Father was the reunion he’d feared the most. He hadn’t forgotten the power of the man’s belt.

  Rem turned in their direction first. He stared at Colt, then Avery, and then Colt again, his eyebrows puckered. It didn’t hurt Colt’s feelings, because Rem had only been ten years old when Colt left. He probably didn’t remember as much about his eldest brother. “Who are your friends, Brand?” Rem asked.

  Brand snorted.

  Father turned, his curiosity melting into open shock as he peered over Rem’s shoulder. The man had gained some weight around the middle an
d lost some hair on his head, but he hadn’t changed all that much otherwise. Instead of the instant anger that Colt had anticipated, Father looked like he was going to burst into tears. Colt stood, ready to face whatever his father would hurl at him.

  He did not expect his father to hurl himself at Colt and hug him. Colt froze a beat, then raised his arms to embrace his father, shocked at the greeting.

  “Seriously, who is that?” Rem asked in a silly stage whisper.

  “It’s Colton, you idiot,” Brand replied. “Your long-lost big brother.”

  “What!?”

  Colt found himself smothered from the backside by Rem, and his heart twisted tight at the unexpected reactions from his family. When Father finally released him, his eyes were dry but his cheeks were red, and he had an odd expression, as if stuck between joy and anger.

  Rem looked pissed, but not necessarily at Colt. “Where the hell have you been all this time?”

  “California,” Colt replied. He studied the young man in his midst, still able to see hints of the chubby kid he remembered leaving behind. “God, you’re all grown up.”

  “That’s what happens when you’re gone for so long, asshole.” Rem’s words were angry, but his tone less so.

  “Language, Remington,” Mom said.

  “Sorry.”

  “California,” Father repeated. “You always used to dream about being Los Angeles County SWAT. Never thought it was more than talk.”

  “It was my dream, Father,” Colt said. “And I made it. I was SWAT for four years, and I worked with the best of the best. We saved a lot of lives, and I made two of the best friends I’ve ever had while in Los Angeles.”

  “He one of those friends?” Father asked, nodding past Colt’s shoulder where Avery was standing.

  This was the moment it all crumbled. “That’s Avery Hendrix. I did meet him in LA, yes, but he isn’t just a friend.” Colt swallowed hard. “He’s my boyfriend.”

  Father’s face went slack. He squinted. “I thought you’d outgrow that phase.”

  “Being gay isn’t a phase. Knowing I’d never be accepted here for my sexuality is half the reason I left the way I did, and the entire reason why I stayed away for the last sixteen years. I left to be myself, and I came back to tell you that I’m happy. I have a job I love, a man I love, and a family waiting for me in California. I guess I needed to find out if I still had one here.”

  “You’re gay?” Rem asked. Brand smacked him across the back of the head to keep him quiet.

  Father stared at Colt, his expression flat and unemotional, and Colt didn’t know what to make of that. He seemed to be struggling with his own emotions, as if his joy at seeing his firstborn again was warring with his own ingrained homophobia. Mom had come to some sort of middle ground by inviting him in for lunch, but Father had the potential to be much more…dramatic.

  “May I speak to you outside, Colton?” Father asked. “In private?”

  That he asked permission at all surprised Colt. Father was a demanding person, declaring what would happen and when. Colt glanced behind him at Avery, who smiled reassuringly and nodded. Less to reassure Colt that Avery felt safe being left behind, and more Avery giving him the courage to speak to his father alone.

  “Yes, okay,” Colt replied. “I’d like that.”

  They went out through the back door, and Colt silently followed Father past the house to the start of the east fence. It overlooked a large swath of the rolling property, and it was one of the family’s favorite views. Father stopped there and rested his elbows on the top of the wooden fence, which came up to about mid-chest. Colt gazed out at the view he’d missed, so different from the tall mountains and rocky terrain of northern California.

  For a while, no one spoke.

  “I used to practice what I’d say to you if I ever saw you again,” Father said, his voice soft, almost hollow. “Now I can’t think of a single thing.”

  “You didn’t chase us off with a shotgun, so right now I’m calling this a win.”

  Father’s exasperated look made Colt do something he never imagined doing during today’s visit: he grinned. This was going a thousand times better than he’d hoped. “Thank you for wanting to speak to me again.”

  “You’re my son, Colton. Firstborn son, and that means something. I may not understand what drives you, but I never stopped loving you.”

  Colt’s eyes burned, and he blinked hard.

  “Help me understand why you left like you did,” Father said. He angled his body to face Colt. “I woke up one morning, two days after you turned eighteen, middle of June, and you were gone. Just a note saying you’d left to chase your dream and live an honest life.”

  “I didn’t think I could do either of those things if I stayed here. The way you reacted when you caught me with Davie, the beating… I knew you’d never accept me, and I couldn’t stomach the idea of being someone else. Of marrying a nice girl, having kids, and taking over the ranch. It wasn’t what I wanted. I couldn’t stay here and be accepted, and I couldn’t stay here and live a lie.”

  “But to just leave, Colton. Your mother mourned you for months. Your siblings didn’t understand, and we didn’t know what to tell them about why their big brother up and disappeared one night. You put us in an untenable position.”

  Colt’s temper tweaked. “You put me in an untenable position by demanding I take over the ranch from you, and by trying to beat me straight. I know you were scared, and maybe you thought the devil was in me, but what you did was wrong, sir.”

  “Men loving men isn’t the natural order of things, son. It’s not what the good Lord intended.”

  “The Bible also says He made us all in His image, right? So God made me gay. I was meant to be this way, and I’ve tried to honor that by being the best man I can be. I’ve made mistakes. Life-changing mistakes, but loving Avery is not one of them, and I will not apologize for loving him. Or for being gay.”

  “No one’s asking you to apologize. I asked for an explanation and you gave me an honest one. Can’t say I understand or accept gay folk’s lifestyle, but you’re still my son. You’re my son and I love you. I’ve missed you something fierce since you left.”

  “Then may I ask you a question?”

  “Of course.”

  “Why didn’t anyone respond to the Christmas card I sent? It came back marked return to sender.”

  “That was my fault. I missed you, but I was bitter, and your mother was so upset by you leaving. When I saw your name on the return address, I didn’t even open it. I stuck it back in the mailbox out of anger and spite, and that was wrong. I regretted it soon after, but the family was rebuilding. So I tried to forget about it. Never could forget you, though. All I could do was say a prayer every night that you were safe, happy, and healthy. But about four years ago, I was diagnosed with non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma.”

  Colt startled. His father looked incredibly healthy, so he’d obviously beaten the cancer, but damn! “Are you okay?”

  “In remission these past three years. But the cancer got me thinking hard about you, and I quietly asked Rem to try to find you on the internet. He didn’t know where to start, and it took a while before he found your name in a few newspaper articles about a bank robbery gone bad in Los Angeles.”

  “That was the worst moment of my life,” Colt said. His chest squeezed with regret as it always did when he remembered Geoff. “I killed a man that day.”

  Father’s entire body jerked. “You did what?”

  Colt never thought he’d admit this truth to his father, but now he couldn’t hold it in. He’d admired his father his entire life, not only for how diligently he provided for his family, but also how strongly he loved them all. “The teller who was shot, he was the boyfriend of my best friend Mack. He was completely broken by it, and usually those investigations are kept internal, but I thought by finding out
who’d fired the shot, I could help give him peace.” Tears welled up and closed his throat. “Instead I found out I’d killed my best friend’s lover. It turned my life upside down.”

  “Oh, son, I’m sorry.” Father pulled him into another hug, and Colt allowed himself to be comforted. He didn’t cry. Somehow his father’s simple, steady presence absorbed those tears and his old grief over what he’d done.

  “I don’t think I could have gotten through finding that out if I hadn’t known Avery. He was my rock back then.”

  “Back then?”

  Colt straightened, grateful for the hug, but he needed to look his father in the face. He and Avery had already agreed upon a simple “how we met” story that didn’t include ropes and floggers. “Five years ago, before the bank robbery, I’d met Avery online in a chat room. We were friends first, and the relationship grew from that. He was there for me when I didn’t know what to do, and I loved him back then. Fiercely. But we didn’t work out for a lot of reasons, and we broke up. I didn’t see him again until last summer, and it was like no time had passed. We were different people, but the love was still there, and getting him back was like a sign from the universe—or maybe God—that we were meant to be. Avery makes me want to be the best man possible.”

  Father smiled warmly. “Your mother makes me want to do the same. Has since our very first date. I knew I’d marry her, raise a family with her. And I did. And I never thought I’d grow up to be the kind of man who chases off his own son. I’m truly sorry for that.”

  “Thank you.” Colt braced for a but.

  “As I said, I don’t understand you loving a man, but I lost you once, and I can’t lose you again. I’m gonna try.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes. I don’t want you driving away and never coming back. It’s gonna take time.”

  “I’ve got time.” This was more than Colt imagined possible. “Thank you, Dad.”

  Father stuck out his hand, and Colt shook without hesitation. Then Father turned to lean against the fence again. “So tell me more about this Avery,” he said.