Fascination Series Boxed Set: Books 1-3

by Sky McCoy

  “Jack, do you have something I can wear. I think these clothes are ripe.” I raised my shirt to smell puke and musk. I can’t go out like this.” I rubbed my chin which had stubble from two days of me not shaving because I didn’t have the desire.

  I guessed I’d given up in those weeks of indecision on my part, and said what the fuck, but now I felt I’d been given a new lease on life as they said, and cared how I looked when I walked in the apartment and confessed to Jeremy that I too had held a secret that I didn’t want him to find out or judge me on.

  “Do you have a razor—?”

  Jack walked closer to me and stood over me. He looked at me as if he’d been shopping for that perfect cut of steak for dinner. He smiled, slanted his head to the right, and confessed, “I think you look hot with that day-old beard. If I were you, I’d just trim it. If my brother is angry when he sees you looking fuckable as you do now, he’ll forget that you didn’t call or come home last night.”

  Looking at Jack smiling at me, I was reminded that he wasn’t Jeremy, although they looked remarkable alike. So much so that if I hadn’t studied their mannerisms when they perpetrated that scheme, I wouldn’t have known the difference between the two.

  “All due respect—”

  “Usually when men use that term all due respect, it’s followed by—” I said cutting Jack off because I knew what he’d say next, and I had to get out my next sentence. “What I was saying is that when you talk to me about being hot and you mention fuck in the same sentence, it makes me uneasy, and frankly sounds kind of creepy coming from my fiancé’s brother, who happens to look exactly like him.”

  Jack chuckled, “So I make you uneasy.”

  “Precisely. You and your husband, but not in a good way.”

  “I get it. I’ll find you some clothes.” He turned on the balls of his feet and headed to his bedroom. Before he opened the door I called out.

  “Where’s Austin?”

  “Jet lag. He went back to bed while you were using up all the water in the hotel.”

  Chapter 11

  Jeremy

  It took most of the night to get everything settled with Jarrett. I didn’t have to post bail of any kind because it wasn’t a serious enough crime. The only crime committed was perhaps Jarrett looking at the police officer’s cock who had been urinating next to him. Since when was that a crime to compare your cock to the next man’s. The last time I checked, and I’d had experience with both sexes, it wasn’t how long or thick your cock was that brought a man or woman to orgasm, but how well you used what you had in your toolbox.

  Lesson learned from Dorian.

  My thoughts were it had more to do with the sexual connection, the charm, the appeal, the fascination that existed between two individuals which would bring them together and keep them wanting more of each other, and that’s how I felt about Dorian and hopefully he felt that way about me.

  Waiting for Jarrett to be released had taken most of the night. Once Jarrett was in the system, things slowed down from there. The best thing Thomas had done through this whole ordeal was to talk to a judge he knew where Jarrett was given an early court date.

  Thomas had been good at one thing, knowing the right asses to kiss on his rise to the top. And the way he could kiss ass with powerful men, I questioned him being straight. I chuckled to myself at the thought because that’s the only time I’d smiled lately when thinking about Thomas. Most of the time I wanted to commit fratricide.

  When we stepped out of the local station-house, Jarrett, a smart and careful dresser, looked like a homeless man with one good suit that he’d worn every day. Jarrett remained quiet, not unlike himself. He never was a man to talk much. He never had much to say even as we were young boys, and he’d been unimaginative. He watched, repeated words, and imitated Thomas in manner and dress.

  It was natural to copy after your older sibling when you were young, but Jarrett never departed from that as he became a man.

  He’d been a follower all his life. He followed Thomas in everything that he did. He took Thomas’s directions and would do so again because he never was one to rock the boat, nor did he have his own ideas.

  Jarrett looked at me and didn’t say, “Thank you, Jeremy.” Not that I wanted a thank you or cared. I’d spent my entire night trying to help him because that’s what you did for your family.

  Buckling up, I glanced over at Jarrett and his eyes met mine. I knew he’d been grateful, he just didn’t know how to say it. That had been a page out of Thomas’s play book. Never apologize.

  I hit a button and the motor started, then I headed in the direction of Jarrett’s home. Another large home in the subdivision where Thomas lived. Another place that under different circumstances, Jarrett couldn’t have afforded on his salary. His wife didn’t work and God only knew what she was doing when he’d been away in Washington D.C.

  My mother would die if she had to witness this. All her beautiful sons had turned into idiots, and Thomas and Jarrett led the pack. At least Jack and I didn’t expose ourselves to public scrutiny where we were afraid to live our own lives, but as they said, to each his own.

  I didn’t relish riding with Jarrett since he didn’t have the courtesy to come to my previous meeting to discuss what to do about Carter. He’d been self-absorbed and concerned about being elected. I’d heard from Thomas that his excuse about not making the last meeting was that he might have to return to Washington D.C. to vote on the latest emergency.

  Jarrett removed me from my thoughts when he said, “Can we have a meeting to discuss my case?”

  I turned to him, narrowed my eyes, and then turned back to the highway. “Now you want a meeting when your ass is in a sling. And I mean that any way you want to take it. When Carter needed help, you wouldn’t even come around and discuss the matter.”

  “I was busy.”

  “Yes I know. You were busy in some restroom trying to pick up men.”

  “I wasn’t trying to pick up anyone. I was framed.”

  “And who do you think your constituents will believe?”

  “They’re going to believe me. As long as my wife stands by me, the people of this state will never go against me. And she will.”

  I wondered why he thought his wife wouldn’t see this as a way to rid herself of him unless she knew something I didn’t know.

  “Would you believe me if I told you that I’d never been with a man? Would you, Jeremy?”

  “Fuck no. I spent my whole life denying that I’d ever fucked a man, and that’s all I did when I wasn’t fucking a woman.”

  “That’s you, Jeremy. I’m not like you. I have sex with my wife. She knows that I like to be fucked in my—”

  I blinked, interrupted him, because I didn’t need my brother, who not so much as asked me about women or men in all these years, to suddenly begin confessing to me as if I was a priest.

  “Look, I’m not here to judge you, or your sexual proclivities, but you don’t have to convince me, you need to convince the men and women in your district in this state. They have to believe you. You need a different type of lawyer and it’s not me. I’m a corporate lawyer. I’ll give you his number and you can call and discuss that with him because I don’t think I want to hear my brother tell me about how he and his wife have sex. That is too personal and weird for me.”

  I drove along. I didn’t realize that I’d been at the jail all night waiting for them to bring Jarrett out, and now it was almost dawn. As I pulled up in Jarrett’s driveway and before he got out, I said to him, “You owe me. I want your ass at the next family meeting and it’s not to discuss your fucking case. It’s nothing. Once the policeman who was stupid enough to run a sting, finds out who you are, and that you’re a Westbrook and the brother of the next governor, he won’t even show up. So get some rest and stay inside with your wife.

  Before Jarrett exited the car, he glanced over at me and confessed like I was the bartender on a Saturday night, but today was Monday. “I wasn’t exactly
truthful with you.” What else is new? “I told Thomas that I had desires for men, but he said that I’d get over it, and to find a woman who understood, so I did.”

  “Just don’t go and confess to the judge, or anyone else if you’re not planning on coming out of the closet or wherever the fuck it is. It’s cold out here if you don’t have a man to love.” I’d been happy that I’d found someone and finally owned up to it.

  I took off and headed home hoping to find Dorian waiting with a cup of coffee, a hot shower, and I’d like to get out some of my frustrations the old fashion way—a good rimming before I fucked him into tomorrow.

  Parker should be waking and I hoped that he and Dorian didn’t get into any sort of disagreements before I reached home, where I’d have to settle them. I didn’t need that shit, especially since my phone had died on me, and I couldn’t make any calls out.

  It would be another week before we’d have separate quarters, a little more room to move about where we wouldn’t get in each other’s way, and step on each other every time we passed in the hall or went to the kitchen.

  As much as I thought my apartment was huge before, it was for one person and maybe a guest now and then, but with three men and a baby and everything in disarray around them, it had become intolerable just to move around all the packed boxes.

  I parked and headed for the elevator, and once inside my apartment I entered the bedroom to find that Dorian hadn’t slept in the bed. When I charged my phone, no text messages or calls of any kind telling me where he’d gone off to.

  After staying up all night I knew I needed a rest, but I couldn’t until I found out where Dorian was. I rushed, dropping my clothes in the hamper, and jumped in the shower. I didn’t bother to shave, then I reached for something in my closet that was easy and comfortable. I dressed in a pair of black slacks and black sweater.

  I called into my office after dressing and said that I’d be in the office later, or if it was important I had a few minutes. Thank goodness no one had any emergencies. I left instructions with my secretary that if anyone needed me, they should text me. The only one I had to answer to was Max, and that would be later today.

  On my way out of my room, Parker walked out of the nursery carrying Jacqueline. She reached up, stretching her little arms in my direction, and wiggled her little fingers waiting for me to pick her up. I gathered her in my arms, kissed her, and handed her off to Parker. She seemed happy for that moment, but I had to find her other daddy. “I have to go, Parker. Dorian didn’t show up last night. Did he call?” I questioned Parker.

  He hesitated for a moment. “Not on the landline.” Then he raised an eyebrow. I took that as meaning he knew something and he didn’t want to say after I’d warned him about getting involved in my relationship with Dorian.

  “I’m going to go to his apartment and see if he spent the night there. I hope I’m not too late, and Phillip hasn’t left yet. Maybe something happened to him,” I said, my voice showing my urgency and concern.

  As I turned on my heels and headed for the door quickly, I heard Parker say, “Did you check at Jack’s? Why don’t you check there first?”

  “Why would he be at Jack’s?”

  Parker shrugged his shoulder, kissed Jacqueline on the cheek, raised her hand at me, and said, “Tell Daddy bye.” Jacqueline looked at me walking away and cried, then Parker turned with her in his arms and headed in the direction of the nursery.

  THAT QUESTION REMAINED in my head as I drove, not to Dorian’s apartment, but to Jack’s hotel. Why would Dorian be at Jack’s? Parker appeared happy to disclose that bit of information. I didn’t want to ask him anymore questions because I didn’t want him to hear the insecurity in my voice and see the self-doubt in my eyes, but then Parker was no fool. He knew how I felt about Dorian, and he knew that by Dorian not calling me or returning to the apartment it would impact our relationship.

  Through worrying about Dorian, and whether he’d been in an accident, and couldn’t call, I couldn’t help but think about what Jack had said about finding Dorian attractive. I really didn’t need that in my head now as I raced across town. I didn’t know that I was jealous.

  I’d never been jealous about Annalisa or any of the men I’d met along the way, but now my heart raced and thoughts filled my headspace. I began to imagine Dorian as he’d lain across the bed on his back and I’d seen his wonderful body, looked into his beautiful green eyes, bit his full lips, when I’d lined my shaft against and pushed inside his tight hole as I lay over him, loving him, fucking him in ways I’d never imagined before. My breath hitched and I thought my heart was beating so fast that it ceased to beat any longer. I had to hold my chest to make sure I was alive.

  My skin was now covered with chill bumps, and my scalp tingled from the thought of Dorian lying with Jack. How could I come back from this? There was no way I could forgive either of them. I had to shake off those thoughts like a footballer who’d gotten hit and knew he had to get to his feet.

  I told myself I was dying a thousand deaths, to just die one. Get to the hotel in one piece and put that shit you’re thinking to rest. The way I was driving now, I could get in an accident. I slowed the car down.

  When I wasn’t driving nearly as fast my mind slowed too. Deep within my core, I knew Dorian wouldn’t be caught dead with Jack, even if Jack had thought about seducing Dorian, which I doubted. So I relaxed on the remainder of my drive to the Millennium Hotel.

  However, I hoped for the best, and I’d check just to get my mind under control. I couldn’t help but think how Dorian hadn’t let me make love to him, and when I’d touch his chest he’d pull away as if my touch had been agonizing and unbearable. He could have told me that he couldn’t stand for me to touch him. Instead he just left me.

  My thoughts now were muddled. I attributed it to not having much sleep.

  The lack of sleep had been working against me and my conclusions had to be wrong. I couldn’t trust my thoughts. There must be something I’d overlooked in my state of mind. The body and mind needed to work together, and so far, my body was exhausted.

  Speaking of overlooking things, I’d had a consultation with Carter’s doctor over the phone. We’d worked on a plan where I could bring him home with me. How the fuck could I do that now? Here I had Dorian, Thomas bothering the fuck out of me every minute about going to a fundraiser, and now I had fucking Jarrett to contend with.

  Parking with the valet and rushing into the lobby of the hotel, into the elevator, I found myself standing in front of Jack’s suite. I paused before ringing the doorbell. I needed time to run this through my mind. Should I look for Dorian? What would I do if I found him with Jack? Would that be the end of my relationship with my brother, or should I let him have Dorian and walk away. I sucked in a large breath as if I took all the air from the hall, and let it out. Then I rang the bell. It took two rings before Jack opened the door.

  “What are you doing here this early? I’d thought you’d have better things to do than to drop in on me this early on a Monday morning.”

  “Are you going to let me in, or do you plan on having this conversation out in the hall? You look nervous.”

  “Now what the fuck do I have to be nervous about?” Jack said as I walked past him and looked around like a burglar casing the place. “Do you want coffee? You look like you need a cup,” Jack added, standing behind me as my eyes roamed around the large room.

  “Yeah, I think I’ll take a cup.” I sat on the sofa that had a blanket and a pillow. I pulled the pillow around, clutched it in my arms, and then smelled Dorian’s scent. I’d known Dorian’s smell in a den or cave even if I’d been surrounded by the undeniable musky scent of wolves. It was Dorian alright. He’d spent the night with Jack.

  I’d tried to act calm as if Dorian being here was no big deal. “Well I guess you won.”

  “What the fuck did I win big brother?”

  “Don’t call me that?” I insisted, staring and locking eyes with Jack. It was as if I’d loo
ked into a mirror. For the first time I’d seen Jack and myself.

  “You won my Dorian. You can have him because I can’t trust him. I thought he loved me and now I find him with you. Sleeping at your place when he should be with me at home.” When I looked to the side there was Dorian standing with his eyes narrowed, and his brow furrowed.

  “You’re giving me to Jack?” he bellowed. “You have no right to give me to anyone. And furthermore, I’m not a prize where you can hand me off. You of all people should have trusted me, but instead you barge in here and accuse Jack of fucking me before you know why I’m here.”

  “I didn’t say he fucked you. I’m wrong but this looked awfully suspicious wouldn’t you say? You have on Jack’s clothes—”

  “Don’t say anything, Jack. It’s none of his business. He’s giving me to you. Isn’t that fucking priceless. If he ever could. If he ever could give me to anyone. I’m my own man. I go with whom I choose, and now I choose not to be with you Jeremy Westbrook. Will you please leave? I haven’t finished my breakfast, and I’d like to eat it without looking in your face.”

  I didn’t know what to do. Like a bull in a china shop I’d managed to run through and break all the fine irreplaceable china—Dorian. I’d been fucking this up with him from one thing after the next. The only thing I knew to do was to go to the office or go home. I turned and headed for the door when Dorian sat to eat.

  When I walked into the hall headed for the elevator, my heart sank when I heard the door open and I thought I’d hear Dorian’s voice, but instead it was Jack.

  “I’ll call you later, Jeremy. You look tired. Get some rest.” How the fuck was I going to rest. The way my mind worked today, I’d be lucky if I could sleep for a week.

  “I’ll try to sleep, Jack, but I don’t know that I can. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”