Fascination Series Boxed Set: Books 1-3

by Sky McCoy

  “I’ll get it, Jack, and there’s nothing wrong with me that a good drink, a good fuck, or—”

  “Don’t say it,” Jack snorted. “I know your pain, and I’ve felt like that way about Thomas and Jarrett forever.”

  I was at the door and opening it when I heard Jack say, “Tell those two cold-hearted bastards to get the fuck in here because I don’t have all night. I have a life unlike those two pretenders.”

  “We heard you, Jack,” Thomas said, dressed in his usual attire, a dark suit, white shirt and blue tie.

  “What are you dressed up for, Thomas? The circus is over. They don’t have it anymore where you can sell your snake oil to the unsuspecting crowd. And you Jarrett, what the fuck is up with you? Do you think that because you wear black that you’ll just disappear into the night scenery? You’re like a white cat going on a hunt at night. You’re not fooling anyone. It’s out about you. Face it Jarrett. That policeman outed you.”

  Thomas and Jarrett sat across from each other and Jack and I stood.

  “I’m innocent.”

  “That’s what they all say when they’re in the closet and get caught for who they are,” Jack said with a wide smile, his eyes on Jarrett when he took a bite of his sandwich, and after a pause he said to Jarrett, “You may be innocent of that transgression, but what were you doing that you would get caught like that? Did your wife get tired of using that dildo on your—”

  “Look Jack, we didn’t come here to have you insult us,” Thomas said, making eye contact with Jack. Jack didn’t waver or look away. He’d always been Thomas’s match in every way possible. When we were young and Thomas tried to bully us, and wanted nothing to do with Carter, Jack was in his face, the way he is now.

  I didn’t interfere in their arguments because I thought they needed to clear the air once and for all, as long as they didn’t come to blows, which I didn’t think they would. My father had laid down rules when we were young that the only fights that were tolerated would be verbal. Throughout the years they had respected his rules, and Jack had perfected his verbal skills.

  After all my father had said we were family, and families argued, fought, and disagreed. That’s what families did, and then they came together to withstand the attacks from outside forces.

  When things had settled down and the air cleared, I said, “Do you want something to eat?”

  “I’ll have a drink, and not beer,” Thomas said.

  “Alcohol. Something strong,” Jarrett added. He followed Thomas in most ways. For years those two were almost as alike in the style of clothes and professions as Jack and me.

  I reached for the last bottle of Scotch in the house. Raising it I said, “This is all I have.”

  “That will be enough,” Jarrett said as he rose and walked around, took the bottle and glass from my hand, then poured a large drink filling the glass.”

  “Whoa, don’t you think that is too much, Jarrett? You’re not going to make that problem of yours go away. I have the best lawyers at my firm on it. Now if it was a case where you pulled your dick out and showed it to a woman, then I’d say you’d be in trouble,” I warned.

  “He hasn’t showed his dick to a woman in years,” Jack said with a chuckle.

  “Enough, Jack. We have a lot to get through tonight, and you can’t snip at everyone because nothing will get solved, and we have to solve this before you go off to New York.”

  “You’re leaving, Jack?” Thomas questioned with a closed smile. His blue eyes sparkling at the news.

  “Don’t get too excited. I’ll be back every so often to take care of my business interests after I get back from my honeymoon.” The room filled with silence, and Thomas, who had been known to trade insults with Jack at any given moment when they found each other in the same room, remained silent until it hit him, and he narrowed his eyes.

  “You’re married?”

  “Don’t get too excited, it’s with a man.”

  “You could have told us,” Jarrett extended his hand to Jack, and Thomas reached for Jarrett’s wrist and pulled his hand away, and aimed a serious glance at Jarrett.

  “No, Jarrett, be careful, you can’t go siding with the enemy,” Jack said, staring at Thomas.

  Thomas turned to me, “I don’t have all night to watch and listen to Jack’s shit so let’s get on with this about Carter.”

  “So there’s no misunderstanding, everyone will contribute to Carter’s wellbeing. He will stay with me and I’ll handle the money our parents left him and you will turn over what Jack and I are entitled to for me to take care of him.”

  “Does he need that much money? We’re talking about a lot of money,” Thomas said.

  “It’s our money,” I added. “We want to spend it on our brother. What about you, Jarrett? Jarrett glanced over at Thomas.

  “I tell you what, Jarrett, let Thomas handle your case and I promise you that you will pay a lot more trying to get out of this mess. It could cost you your wife, your congressional seat, and your standing in your community.”

  Jarrett, although he’d been a follower all his life, knew the truth when he heard it.

  “Give him my share, Thomas.”

  “You’re doing the right thing, Jarrett.”

  Jarrett took a long drink.

  “I’d say this was a good family meeting. I feel great already. Now it’s time to go home and fuck my husband,” Jack said jokingly.

  “Must you always be so vulgar?”

  “Must you always be a pussy, Thomas,” Jack added. “What the fuck do you do with Alice? Sniff her panties. We know what Jarrett does. He loves a good fucking in the ass.”

  “Let’s go, Jarrett. I think we’re through here,” Thomas said, taking the glass from Jarrett.

  There was one thing about Jack, he knew how to clear a room. After Thomas and Jarrett left I turned to Jack, “Did you have to?”

  “They would have been here all night trying to convince us that we are wrong and that you shouldn’t have control over the money. I need to get home to my man and where the fuck is Dorian? I thought by now he would have told you why he’d didn’t want to fuck you.”

  “What did you say?” My mouth opened and I blinked. “How do you know what goes on in my bedroom? Has Parker been snooping around and mentioned something to you?”

  “No. And it’s not what you think.”

  “Then what is it? If you know something, tell me. Does he have someone? Does he love him?”

  “Slow down, big brother.”

  “He has a man and he loves him.” I slumped down on the sofa. “I need a drink and maybe a cigarette.”

  “You don’t need any of that shit. You have a child to think about, and a man that loves you.”

  I glanced over at Jack. “If you know something then tell me.”

  “It’s true, Dorian had been hiding a secret from you.”

  “I knew something had to be wrong.” I stood. “The very thing that he almost didn’t forgive me for, keeping secrets.”

  “Don’t go off the deep end. He needs to tell you—”

  I couldn’t wait for answers and I was angry and cut off Jack in the middle of his sentence. “If you know something tell me,” I insisted.

  “I don’t like to betray friends.”

  “But you would betray a brother?”

  Jack strode around the room, put his hands in his pockets, and looked out at the terrace. “You have a terrific view here. Someone will get a great apartment.”

  “Will you tell me for fuck’s sake?” Jack bit his lip and took his time, then he finally said, “Dorian thought he was sick, but he only just found out that he wasn’t. That’s all I can tell you. Dorian will have to tell you the rest. Give him time and for fuck’s sake, don’t tell him I said anything. He’ll never trust me again.”

  I’d been confronted with the ugly truth, and if something had happened to Dorian, there was no way I could navigate this life without him. He’d been the one who told me the truth when everyone around
me wouldn’t—the women I’d dated, men I’d fucked along the way, and especially the men in my family who had been living a lie, Jarrett, Thomas, Jack, and myself—I’d been living the most worrisome lie of all. Thinking that Lindsey would help Carter, and I could pack away my guilt for once and live my life—that I could go through life fucking men and women without allowing myself to fall in love with either sex.

  It took one man and the right circumstances to make the planets line up, and I fell irreversibly in love with that one man—Dorian Hart. He had to know that by my ill attempts, and my destructive jealousy, that I loved him, and if he didn’t know, then I had to find a way to let him know that I was totally committed to making him mine, and whatever worried him, whatever hurt him, also hurt me.

  “Where are you going?” Jack asked.

  “I’m going to get a puppy.”

  “A puppy? What for? Jacqueline isn’t ready for one.”

  “It’s not for Jacqueline it’s for Dorian.”

  “Your life is fucked up without Dorian, and all you can think about is buying a dog? What about a ring? Nothing says love like a ring when you ask someone to marry you. You’re going to ask him?”

  “I’ve asked Dorian several times and I’ve yet to get an answer. I have the ring. I had it the day I first asked him to marry me.” I looked at Jack. “Can you go with me to pick out the dog? I wouldn’t know where to start.”

  “When you see it you will know. It’s just like when you first laid eyes on Dorian.”

  I thought I knew what Jack was talking about. When you saw something, or someone you got an inexplicable feeling where you couldn’t do without them.

  “I can’t go with you, Jeremy. I need time to pack because I’m going back to New York with my husband. That does sound great. Going back with my husband. See, I said it again,” Jack admitted, as if his words were magical, and by saying it, he’d live happily ever after.

  I watched Jack and smiled. The look of sheer joy and happiness took over him. I’d never seen Jack at peace before. He’d fought against everything, and now it was like in war, he’d grown tired of fighting, he’d raised the white flag when he knew he couldn’t win, or didn’t want to win. He’d probably gotten tired of running and fighting against falling in love. I thought he just wanted some semblance of peace between himself and Austin, so they could begin to live their lives together.

  War just created an unstable climate for all involved, and I was just plain exhausted too, and like a fighter who’d had too many blows to the body or head, I was ready to throw in the towel. I wanted Dorian and I’d do anything to get him back. And I planned on leaving my jealousy at the door.

  Jack looked around, “It’s quiet, where’s Parker and Jacqueline?”

  “I saw no reason why they had to stay here today when the house is ready. I’m waiting here for the movers to cart everything away, and then I’m putting this place up for sale. Goodbye to my old life and hello to new beginnings.”

  When Jack left I was dying to see Dorian. However, I needed to get over to the house and sleep in my own bed. And be with my little girl. The movers would have everything out by tomorrow, and I could put this apartment up for sale. The way the housing shortage was around Seattle, once this apartment went on the market someone would snap it up the next day.

  Standing and looking around, I said goodbye to my single life and to my youth. With a home and the expectation that I’d beg Dorian to forgive me and marry me, and if he did, I would enter into a new phase of my life. I prayed I’d have the courage to handle a child, a spoiled husband, and my brother Carter.

  I closed up the house and headed to the garage parking lot. Once I climbed into the car, I knew that I couldn’t waste any time. I needed to see Dorian and ask him what the fuck he was doing by hiding his health problems from me.

  Chapter 16

  Dorian

  I texted Jack early and told him not to meet me at the doctor’s office because I could handle everything now, the news I would get from the specialists on my team who were in charge of interpreting the imagining.

  I could face that because Jack had given me advice and a shoulder to lean on. Now I knew I could walk upright. I just needed to get to Jeremy and tell him everything I’d been afraid to tell him before. Finally, I’d found the courage with Jack’s help to face Jeremy.

  If I needed to talk to anyone after I’d gotten my results, I had Christian. He had scheduled me in to see him after I’d spoken to my team. Christian had to be the best friend I could have met on an online dating app. Go figure. You met the finest people in some of the strangest places.

  I’d met Jeremy on a stage, then in the bathroom of a country club, and I didn’t know then that he’d be the finest man I had ever come across, or probably would ever encounter in my life. I’d known immediately that I’d been attracted to him physically. He was handsome all dressed up in his best and most expensive suit, standing there alone on that stage, the light hitting that exquisite face and body. It was as if it was yesterday and it wasn’t that long that I’d fallen in love with him, and given myself to him completely.

  Damn, he was hot when he’d walked off that stage and the stage lights caught those deep blue eyes, but not as hot as he was now, and if he left me after this, I’d understand because I could only imagine how angry with me he would be, as I’d been with him for not telling me about the pain he’d experienced with his family, and the hurried decisions he’d had to make.

  I should have trusted that Jeremy would understand how horrible I felt when I learned about my health issues because he’d just gone through some soul-sucking problems of his own.

  Too much time had passed and now I didn’t think he would understand why I hadn’t told him about myself or why I’d pushed him away when we’d been so close.

  I had no reason to hide my health issues from Jeremy, not to tell him everything. I should have asked him to come with me to talk to the doctors, especially when he’d asked me to marry him.

  It was that reason that I accepted if he walked away, and refused to talk to me as I’d done him.

  However, I’d be willing to stalk him or even beg him to take me back. When it came to Jeremy Westbrook, I’d have no respect for myself and no decency. I’d let him fuck me in a back alley and use me for the rest of his life just to be a part of him, I thought, as I drove to valet parking for the medical clinic.

  I just hoped it would never come to that.

  FUCK ME. “IT’S OVER,” I murmured as I strutted out after meeting with the doctors assigned to my team. I had a smile on my face and I was sure people were wondering if I’d won the lottery. And hell if I hadn’t. The way I felt when they said, “There’s nothing wrong with you, Mr. Hart, except you may have gained more weight than you should have for your height and weight.” I’d stopped going to the gym when I thought, What the hell, who am I trying to look good for? I could be dead soon.

  Boy, was that a crazy thought. And I realized, just because you’d been diagnosed with something you didn’t die just like that, unless you were in an accident on your way home, and the probabilities of that happening were far more likely than dying from cancer.

  One thing I realized, was that no matter what, I should care about my health. I had a man and a child to think about. It was time to go back to eating right, exercising because I had more than myself to consider. I wanted to shout, as I strutted, heading for parking, I had a man. I had a man. Or not. I planned on finding out soon enough.

  I couldn’t accept Jeremy’s offer of marriage before because a man like him deserved a partner who took care of himself and looked good. However, I was more than just a pretty face and I hoped Jeremy knew that.

  When I stopped at the bathroom and passed a mirror, I thought about how I would look in my tux when I walked down the aisle to stand beside the most handsome man alive. I posed until someone entered the restroom and narrowed his eyes at me and I rushed out.

  I couldn’t feel my steps. I knew they wer
e light as if walking on air. I’d just dodged the worst thing that could have happened to a young man, and I wasn’t about to waste this time on petty bullshit. I had more time now and I would use it to be happy.

  After Phillip and I had that talk about Parker, I realized that Parker had been standing between me and Jeremy being happy. Phillip might have mentioned Parker just to rile me because I’d been hard on Eric.

  I’d been critical of Phillip’s lifestyle. I got it. I had no right to get involved in his life or anyone else’s for that matter. Nevertheless, after Phillip had moved in with me I felt justified to say something. I knew that I was a bit heavy-handed when it came to Eric, because he reminded me of all the things I didn’t want in my life when I met a man I cared about. I didn’t want the fucking around, the cruising bars and bathhouses, looking for men to spice up my life with my partner.

  Phillip had wanted me off his back, and he didn’t want to be reminded that I could be right about everything that had to do with Eric. Phillip had mentioned Parker because he needed to distract me where I wouldn’t pay close attention to him, and whatever it was that he’d been doing with the company. When it came to Phillip and his misplaced love for Eric, I had to watch my ass all the time.

  The only way to do that was for Phillip to make me see things I hadn’t seen. A man had to be happy in his life to function properly with his partner and I wasn’t happy because there were interferences coming from outside, and inside. That outside was Parker, that inside was me.

  Jeremy was my partner. I’d never really had a partner before. Phillip was never that to me unless it had to do with business where he had a stake in whether it flourished or not. Living with Phillip had skewed my ideas on how a partner was supposed to behave, and Phillip had to be the worst example of one.

  Phillip fucked around, lied to me, and turned his back on me when I needed him the most. And he was the worst friend ever, yet I remained his friend and I still loved him, not for what he was to me now, but for what he’d been to me years ago when my parents disowned me.