Not the Marrying Kind

by Jae

  Ash had a feeling Sasha had wanted to continue her teasing by kissing her thigh, but Sasha sucked in a breath and seemed to forget her little game. Her nostrils flared, and she let out a hum of appreciation that sent warm breath across Ash’s damp heat.

  She shuddered and groaned helplessly.

  Eyes blazing, Sasha looked back up at her, then dipped her head. Her warm tongue swirled through Ash’s wetness.

  The pleasure was so intense that Ash cried out. She clamped her teeth onto her bottom lip to hold back the loud moans rising up her throat.

  “No,” Sasha said fiercely. “Don’t hold back. I want to hear you.”

  When she closed her mouth over Ash and slid two fingers into her at the same time, holding back wasn’t an option anyway. With a strangled gasp, Ash arched up against her and clutched at Sasha’s hair, her shoulders, anything she could reach.

  Sasha matched the rhythm of Ash’s hips with her fingers and her mouth.

  Much too soon, tension uncoiled from deep inside of her. Her legs shook uncontrollably. Her senses blurred, and her entire world was reduced to the pleasure caused by Sasha. She bucked her hips against Sasha one final time, then shouted out her name as her entire body seemed to melt into one pulsating ball of ecstasy.

  Sasha stayed with her, letting her ride it out as Ash continued to shudder and quake against her. When the tremors finally stopped, she carefully withdrew and slid up Ash’s body.

  Ash swallowed against a dry throat. She lifted her arms, which felt heavy with pleasure, and tightly wrapped them around Sasha.

  Lovingly, Sasha kissed her shoulder, her neck, her forehead. She took Ash’s face between her big hands and caressed her cheeks with her thumbs. “Again?”

  Ash groaned, half enthusiasm, half protest. “Oh God. I might need a moment to recover first. That was pretty intense.”

  Sasha laughed, but her gaze was concerned. “No, I mean, you’re crying again.”

  Dazed, Ash reached up and touched her face.

  Sasha brought Ash’s hand to her lips and kissed the dampness off her fingertips. “Are you okay?”

  “Yes. More than okay. I don’t know why this keeps happening. I promise it won’t always—”

  Sasha kissed her, slowly and deeply.

  Tasting herself on Sasha’s lips made new heat rush through Ash.

  “Don’t apologize,” Sasha said fiercely. “I want you to feel everything when we’re together. No hiding, no holding back.”

  Ash kissed her back. “I don’t think I could hold anything back with you, even if I wanted—and I don’t.”

  “Good.” Sasha rolled onto her back, drew Ash half on top of her, pulled the blanket up over both of them, and turned off the light.

  Ash cuddled close. She slid her leg across Sasha’s thighs and laid her head on what was quickly becoming her favorite spot on her shoulder. Every inch of her body felt languid, and she knew that, for the first time, no doubts, regrets, or concerns would keep her awake after a night of passion.

  Sasha’s heartbeat settled into a calming rhythm beneath her ear, and the soothing caresses along Ash’s back slowed and then stopped.

  Sleep tugged at Ash’s eyelids too, but she fought it, because as content as she felt, there was something clawing at her chest that needed to come out. “Sasha?” she whispered into the darkness.

  “Hmm?”

  “Um, would it be very cliché of me to tell you that I think I love you?”

  The peaceful breathing beneath her ear stopped and was then replaced by a startled gasp. Sasha darted her hand around until she found the light switch. When the light flared on, she stared up at Ash with wide eyes.

  Oh shit. Ash stared back. Sasha clearly hadn’t been ready to hear that. “I mean, I know it’s probably too soon and not very original to say it right after we…you know, but…”

  Sasha smiled. “Well, then I’m just as unoriginal, because I love you too.”

  “You…you do?”

  “Yeah.” Sasha looked deeply into her eyes, radiating so much love that Ash nearly teared up again. “I’ve probably been in love with you since Florida—that first night, not the second—but I didn’t want to admit it, even to myself.”

  “I think it was even sooner than that for me,” Ash admitted with a smile. Now that she could look back at it without fear, it was easy to recognize.

  Sasha caressed her back with long strokes. “When?”

  “When we made cupcakes together and then got into that food fight. I’d never done anything so crazy before. And then that kiss…” Ash let out a little moan. “I don’t think I’ll ever be able to eat a cupcake again without thinking about it.”

  “Hmm. I don’t have any cupcakes in the house right now, and that might be a problem because you,” Sasha rolled them over and captured Ash’s mouth in a deep, heartfelt kiss, “are going to miss breakfast.”

  “I am?” Ash gasped out, her hips already rocking against Sasha’s thigh.

  Sasha nodded and leaned down to nibble her throat. “And possibly lunch.”

  That was the last thing either of them said for quite some time, with the exception of “oh God,” breathless gasps of each other’s name, and whispered words of love.

  Chapter 22

  Sunlight filtered through Sasha’s closed lids. She blinked open her eyes and realized she was on her side, facing the bedside table, where the alarm clock showed it was eleven o’clock. Wow. She hadn’t slept that late since culinary school.

  Her gaze fell on the empty spot in bed beside her.

  Sasha tensed.

  Then she felt the warmth against her back.

  They had changed positions while they had slept, and now Ashley was cuddled up to her from behind, her leg tucked between Sasha’s and her face pressed between her shoulder blades.

  Relief flowed through Sasha. She exhaled sharply and only now realized how worried she’d still been, even after Ashley’s declaration of love and her promise to stay. Apparently, the fear of being left sat deeper than she’d thought, but she trusted them to work through it together.

  “Morning,” Ashley mumbled behind her and sleepily pressed her lips to Sasha’s back.

  Sasha turned in her arms and kissed her. “Good morning. Hmm, I love waking up with you.”

  Ashley looked her in the eyes, and Sasha could tell Ashley sensed the deeper meaning behind her words. “I promised.”

  “You did.” Sasha caressed her cheek, and Ashley leaned her face into the touch, her eyes fluttering closed. “But that doesn’t mean it’s going to be easy for you. People will talk, and I know that will bring up a lot of painful memories for you. If you’d rather not make it public yet…”

  “Thank you.” Ashley took Sasha’s face between both hands and kissed her tenderly. “I know what that offer cost you. But I don’t think it’s how we should do this. It’s not going to work anyway. Half of the guests at the wedding probably saw us kiss in front of the barn last night, and Brooke already guessed days ago.”

  “Wow. She did?” Sasha would have loved to have been a fly on the wall during that conversation. “How did she react?”

  “She said she’s shipping us, whatever that means.”

  Sasha chuckled. “She’s a woman of taste. I’m shipping us too.” Then she sobered and studied Ashley’s face. “Are you okay with that? People finding out, I mean.”

  Ashley leaned her head against Sasha’s shoulder and sighed. Her warm breath fanned over Sasha’s skin, making her shiver pleasantly. “It’s going to be hard for me. Not being able to hide that part of me that I’ve kept hidden for so long. It feels like suddenly everyone can see me naked.”

  “No.” Sasha trailed her hand down Ashley’s bare side. “Only I get that privilege.”

  Ashley smiled. The worry lines on her forehead disappeared. “Are we feeling a little possessive?
” she asked, her tone teasing.

  “Maybe a little.” Sasha held her thumb and index finger a fraction of an inch apart. “Is that okay?”

  “Yeah. Because I don’t want anyone else to see you naked either.”

  Sasha kissed her. “Don’t worry. The two of us are having steak, and no one else is invited to dinner. And if you want to dine in private for a while, that’s fine with me.”

  “Like I said, I’m not sure that’s even an option anymore. By Monday, half of Fair Oaks will probably know. I’ll get used to it. I just…”

  “What?” Sasha trailed her fingers through the hair at Ashley’s temple. “Talk to me, please.”

  “I’m worried about Mrs. Beasley. Everyone else could hurt my feelings, but she could really hurt my shop. What if she convinces her husband and her friends to get their flowers elsewhere?”

  Sasha grimly shook her head. “Your flower shop is the best one in town.”

  Ashley’s lips curved up into a small smile. “It’s the only one in town.”

  “Yeah, well, it would be the best even if it wasn’t the only one,” Sasha said with conviction. “And I’m not just saying that because I’m biased. Yes, you might lose some customers, but I think you’ll keep most. People like going with what they know. Plus you have friends. Leo’s mother is in the choir, and Holly’s mom has helped every pet owner in town at some point. I also know a little bakery who’d love to do some fun promotions with you—buy a bouquet, get a cupcake free or something like that. The possibilities are endless.”

  “Endless, hmm?” Ashley looked at her with so much tenderness that Sasha’s chest swelled. “Have I told you how much I love you?”

  “Not in the last,” Sasha glanced at the alarm clock, “five hours.”

  “How negligent of me. Can’t have that.” Ashley kissed both corners of Sasha’s mouth, then nibbled her lips. “I love you.”

  “I love you too.” Hearing the words—and saying them—still made Sasha’s heart sing, and she didn’t think that would change anytime soon, if ever.

  Their lips met in a long kiss.

  “You are right,” Ashley said when the kiss ended. “I’ll be fine, no matter what. Even if things are tough for a while, we’ll think of something.”

  “I like the sound of that,” Sasha said softly. “We.”

  “That’s how I want to handle things from now on. Together. That’s why it’s not just up to me to decide how we’ll handle people. What do you want?”

  Sasha thought about it. “You know I’m not the type to make a huge public declaration either. Why don’t we play it by ear and just do whatever feels right at any given moment?”

  Ashley smiled and cuddled closer. “Hmm. Do what feels right. Sounds good to me. Because this,” she let her hands wander over Sasha’s bare back, “feels very right.”

  “Yes,” Sasha breathed out as Ashley’s leg slipped between hers, “yes, it does. But I think you need to call your parents first and tell them you’ll be missing lunch.”

  Ashley lifted her head and stared across Sasha at the alarm clock. “Oh shit. I didn’t realize it was so late. Sasha, I’m so sorry. There’s nothing I want more than to stay in bed with you all day, but my parents are really struggling with my sexual orientation, and if I skip lunch because of you, it’s not going to help them accept it—or you.”

  As much as Sasha wanted to ignore the rest of the world and keep Ashley in her arms for the entire weekend, she knew Ashley was right. She threw back the covers and swung her legs out of bed.

  “You don’t have to get up,” Ashley said.

  “I do. Because I’m going to introduce you to the pleasures of a quickie in the shower.”

  Ashley jumped out of bed with a speed that made Sasha laugh.

  Early on Monday morning, Ash sang along with one of Leo’s songs on the radio all the way to the farm. Twice, a yawn interrupted her enthusiastic singing.

  After two nights with little sleep and getting up at four a.m. this morning, when Sasha’s alarm clock had gone off, she was tired, but at the same time, she felt more alive than ever.

  Maybe she could keep up her good mood by slipping in and out of the barn without her parents noticing.

  Lunch with them yesterday had been tense, with her parents going out of their way to avoid mentioning Sasha, the wedding, or Ash’s coming-out. Apparently, they had decided that the way to handle her sexual orientation was to ignore it.

  Ash had let them get away with it—for now. But in the future, she would try to weave Sasha into the conversation whenever she could. Not that it would be difficult since Sasha was pretty much all she was thinking of right now.

  The sun was just rising over the horizon when she parked her car in front of the barn and began gathering her centerpieces and containers left over from the wedding.

  The catering tent was gone, and so were the white drapes and the strings of fairy lights.

  Ash stood at the entrance of the barn and stared inside, almost unable to believe that this had been the magical place where she’d worked up the courage to dance with Sasha.

  A gum paste alstroemeria rested on the barrel next to the barn doors. Ash picked it up and lifted it to her nose, then laughed at herself. Of course it didn’t have a scent, no matter how real it looked.

  But then her nose detected a hint of cinnamon.

  Mmm. Ash closed her eyes and inhaled deeply.

  “Good morning,” her mother’s voice from behind her made her jerk.

  Ash turned and automatically hid the gum paste flower behind her back. Then, when she noticed what she was doing, she withdrew her hand and returned it to the front. No more hiding. “Morning, Mom. You’re up early.”

  Her mother gave her a puzzled look. “You know we keep farmer’s hours. But what brings you out here so early?”

  Keeping baker’s hours, Ash nearly answered, but despite her resolution to not hide anymore, she didn’t want to rub it in her mother’s face where she’d spent the night…or rather the last two nights. “I thought I’d get my stuff before work so Dad can have the barn back.”

  Her mother nodded and helped her get the flower arrangements to the car. They worked in silence until all the centerpieces were stowed in the back of the SUV. Ash missed the easy chatter they normally kept up. It would probably be a while before things between them returned to normal. But at least her mother was trying.

  Ash carefully set the gum paste alstroemeria in a safe corner of the trunk.

  “It’s beautiful,” her mother said quietly.

  “Sasha made it.”

  “I know.” Her mother’s expression was stony.

  Ash swung the hatch closed and shuffled her feet. “Is it okay if I take Casper with me now? Thanks for offering to take him all weekend, by the way.”

  “Of course. We always love having him.” Her mother sighed and added, “Since he’s going to be our only grandchild.”

  Ash bit her lip, totally unprepared for that topic. She had never allowed herself to think about kids, and she had no idea if Sasha would want any, so she pretended she hadn’t heard her mother’s mumbled words.

  Silence settled over them as they crossed the yard and entered the house. Ash was glad for Casper’s excited whining when he saw her. She greeted him, then looked around for his leash.

  Her mother leaned against the sink and watched her every move, as if comparing what she saw to the Ashley she had thought she knew. “Do you want to stay for breakfast? Your father and I already ate, but I still have a bit of leftover tater tot casserole from yesterday.”

  Ash’s stomach let out an enthusiastic growl, answering for her. She pressed her hand to her belly and fought a blush as she remembered what had made her skip breakfast. “Thank you. I’d like that.”

  She sat at her customary place at the table and dug into the casserole while her mo
ther nursed a cup of coffee and watched her.

  Neither of them said anything beyond “This is great” until Ash had cleared her plate.

  It was only when Ash rinsed her plate and put it into the dishwasher that her mother said softly, “You look good. Different, but good.”

  Ash kept her back to her to hide the blush climbing up her throat. Could her mother really see a change in her? Ash certainly felt different.

  When she slowly turned, her mother ran her fingers through Ash’s hair, as she’d done when Ash had been a little girl.

  Oh. She means my hair. She self-consciously fingered the shorter strands. “Thank you. I like it.”

  “Well, I’ll admit I liked your hair better when it was longer.”

  “You’ll get used to it,” Ash said.

  Her mother studied her for several seconds, then she sighed. “I suppose I will.” She walked Ash to the door and kissed her cheek.

  Ash could feel her gaze following her all the way to the car. With Casper in the passenger seat, she drove back into town and steered down Main Street. When she passed the bakery, she couldn’t resist and stopped the car. “Casper, stay. I’m gonna get us a treat.”

  Her real treat, of course, was getting to see Sasha.

  As she crossed the street, she could see her behind the counter, selling her delicious baked goods to several early-morning customers. Ash’s heart skipped a beat at the sight of her.

  She drank in Sasha’s tall form, her confident stance, her easy laugh, and the way she didn’t slouch even though her height made her stand out in the crowd.

  Before she could even pull open the door, Sasha looked up, and their gazes connected through the glass.

  A broad smile crinkled the corners of Sasha’s eyes.

  The person in front of the counter turned, probably to see who had made Sasha smile that way.

  Oh shit. It was Mr. Beasley, of all people. Ash swallowed down the lump in her throat and forced herself to pull the door open.

  There was a line in front of the counter, typical for a Monday morning, and Ash felt as if everyone was watching her as she got in line. Cindy Kaufman, the choir leader, leaned across one of the small tables to whisper something to a friend of hers.