Forbidden Love

by Phillips, Laura

  If Dave gave her a name, she didn’t know what she would do with it. She couldn’t turn it over to the police. Would she be able to go to Jackie?

  “Here you go,” Dave said, turning his laptop back to her.

  Cam’s eyes scanned over all the code and numbers until her eyes fell on a name.

  Megan Donovan.

  “That’s who sent the email,” Dave said, his finger pointing to a series of numbers on the screen. “And that’s her IP address. Do you know her?”

  “No.”

  “Well, it’ll be easy enough to find her. That IP address will seal it if you’re going to press charges.”

  “Thank you. You have no idea,” Cam said, a smile tugging at her lips. “I’ll just take a photo of all this,” she said, holding her phone up to the screen to capture the name and IP address.

  “It’s no problem.” Dave closed his laptop and slid it into this backpack. “I have to get going though. See you next week.”

  “Bye. Thanks, Dave,” she called after him, feeling a rush of emotions.

  She didn’t know whether to be happy or relieved or furious. She had a name. But who was she? Who was Megan Donovan?

  Cam took out her phone and Googled the name in quotations. Pages and pages of results came up, so she tried to narrow it down by typing in some local towns.

  Eventually, after scrolling through pages and pages of results she found something she recognized: her college.

  Megan Donovan worked in the English department at her college. Why would she do this? Cam had to talk to Jackie.

  There was no way that this Megan would be able to follow her every move. Once Cam had taken her threat seriously, Megan probably wasn’t keeping as close an eye on things. Three months had gone by.

  How did she find out that they were having an affair in the first place? Cam still couldn’t figure out how they could’ve gotten caught.

  Chapter 34

  Jackie changed into her running clothes and laced up her white and blue running shoes as she sat on the edge of her bed. Her black hair was already tied back in a ponytail and she made her way out into the living room to do a few stretches before she left.

  The weather was improving, and she was hoping that it would help get her out of the dark funk she’d been in since the holidays. She needed to get back into running. She knew it was good for her both mentally and physically.

  She bent over and did a few more stretches before reaching for her headphones that were on the narrow wooden table beside her front door.

  She pulled open the door as she plugged her headphones into her phone and opened up her running playlist. When she looked up, ready to head out the door, Cam was standing there, on her porch, and she wasn’t sure what to feel.

  She’d only seen Cam from a distance over the last few months when she was crossing the campus parking lot or making her way from one building to another. Jackie’s eyes always seemed to find her in the crowd.

  Jackie knew she should be angry. She could easily slam the door in her face. Cam had ignored every single call and text that Jackie had left her in the last three months.

  Jackie was frozen in place though, not sure what to do. She wanted to say something, but she’d said everything she’d wanted to say in the voice mails she’d left Cam.

  Cam’s eyes were locked onto hers, silently willing her to give her a chance, to not slam the door in her face.

  “I know I’ve been a complete asshole,” Cam said in a shaky voice. “Things got crazy and I know you don’t owe me anything, but can I please come inside for five minutes? I’ll explain everything…”

  Jackie felt her throat tighten as her stomach flip flopped. If she couldn’t slam the door in Cam’s face, she could always run right past her, ignoring Cam like she’d ignored her, continuing on with her plans for a run but Jackie’s feet were cemented in place.

  “Jackie, please.”

  “Okay,” Jackie finally said, stepping back to let Cam pass.

  The scent of Cam’s perfume left Jackie feeling almost dizzy as she walked past her into the living room. The musky aroma brought Jackie back to those nights that they’d spent together.

  “Can we sit down?” Cam asked.

  “Sure,” Jackie said, taking the lead and sitting down on the beige sofa.

  Cam took a deep breath. “I just want to say that you have no idea how much I wish things had gone differently. The last few weeks have been torture… I probably shouldn’t even be here right now but anyway… I got an email at the end of December threatening to make our affair public if I made contact with you again.”

  Jackie’s mouth went dry. Her mind was racing as she tried to process everything that Cam had just said.

  Blackmail… Why? Who?

  Cam kept talking when Jackie failed to respond. She had so many things that she wanted to say but she couldn’t get her mouth to move.

  “It could have just been a prank,” Cam said with a sigh. “But I couldn’t risk it. They said you’d get fired, that my life at college would be hell until I graduated. So, I stayed away… As hard as it was.”

  “I’ll fucking kill her,” Jackie said, standing up and pacing the living room.

  “Who?”

  “Linda. She could see the way I looked at you… She knew what was going on even though I didn’t tell her outright. And she took every opportunity to tell me to break it off with you. She must have got tired of waiting for me to do it and took matters into her own hands.”

  “Do you know Megan Donovan?”

  Jackie turned to meet Cam’s eyes. What did Megan have to do with this?

  “Yes. She’s a professor at the college. We dated for a while a few years ago.”

  “That’s who sent the email,” Cam said simply.

  “What? How do you know?”

  “I know someone who was able to trace the email. It came from a computer that she owns.”

  “Megan?” Jackie asked in disbelief, more to herself than to Cam.

  “I don’t know what to do. I shouldn’t have come here but when I knew who did it… I thought I could. I don’t know why. We still can’t go to the police because that would be admitting that we did have an affair.”

  “We could blackmail her,” Jackie said, her heart pounding in her ears.

  “How? We’d have to get some dirt on her.”

  “I have these photos somewhere in my email.”

  “What kind of photos?”

  “They’re… Well, they’re kinky.”

  “Really?” Cam asked, a smirk forming on her face and Jackie knew that she was wondering what Jackie was into.

  “Yes. I don’t think I deleted them.”

  “And you’re willing to use them?”

  “I really don’t want to, but we just need Megan to think that I would.”

  Jackie left the room without saying anything and came back a minute later with her laptop. She sat down and opened it up, logging into her email, searching for the photos.

  It took her a few minutes, but she found what she was looking for and hit print, sending the photos to her wireless printer in her office.

  Jackie went down the hall to retrieve them and stuffed them into a folder.

  “I’m going to meet her, today if I can,” Jackie said as she slid the folder into her bag that was on the coffee table. “She should drop this whole thing when she sees that I still have these.”

  Jackie sank down into the sofa, sitting closer to Cam this time.

  “So, those photos will do just as much damage as you having an affair with a student would?”

  “Definitely. I would die if photos like that of me got out,” Jackie said with a shudder.

  “And do those kinds of photos exist?”

  Jackie laughed. “No… Come here,” she said, her hand finding Cam’s, pulling her towards her.

  Jackie’s hand left hers and cupped her cheek as their lips met for the first time in more than three months. Jackie sighed as Cam’s lips brushed across
hers, sending a shiver through her body.

  She didn’t think she’d ever get enough of Cam. The last three months had been some of the hardest she could remember. She’d been absolutely miserable.

  She knew she’d been falling for Cam, but her absence from her life made it crystal clear that this was so much more than a fling.

  Jackie breathed in slowly, stifling a moan as Cam’s tongue met hers in a searing kiss. Cam’s hand slid under Jackie’s running shirt and she almost lost it, but Jackie broke the kiss, putting some space between them.

  “As much as I want to rip those clothes off you and spend the rest of the day in bed,” Jackie said with a smile, “I’m going to go see Megan and put this all behind us. Will you wait for me? I shouldn’t be long.”

  “Of course,” Cam said, returning her smile. “I already feel so much better, but it would be fantastic to know that it was all over, and we had nothing to worry about.”

  “I’ll give her a call and see if she’ll meet me for coffee,” Jackie said, rooting through her bag for her phone. She strode down the hall and into her bedroom to get changed into jeans and a top, leaving her running gear back in the drawer.

  She tried to sound sincere when Megan answered the phone and Jackie suggested that they go for a coffee and catch up. Megan was all for it and they agreed to meet at the Starbucks that was ten minutes away.

  Jackie hung up and walked back into the living room, dropping her phone back into her bag. Cam was standing beside her now.

  “I won’t be long,” Jackie said, leaning in to brush her lips across Cam’s.

  “Hopefully, we’ll have something to celebrate.”

  “I’m pretty sure we will. Make yourself at home while I’m gone,” Jackie said as she kissed Cam one last time before making her way over to the front door. “I’m so sorry that you got that email.”

  Cam shook her head. “We’ll talk about it when this is all over.”

  “I’ll see you soon.”

  “Good luck.”

  Chapter 35

  Jackie sat in the back corner of the coffee shop, wanting to have as much privacy as possible if Megan caused a scene.

  When Megan pushed open the door, she smiled when her eyes found Jackie’s and Jackie managed to smile back. She watched Megan order her drink and she wondered how she was going to play this.

  Jackie had the envelope with the photos in her bag by her feet, like a loaded gun on her hip, just within reach when she needed it.

  “Hey Jackie,” Megan said with a warm smile as she sat down across from her, flicking her blond hair over her shoulder. “How are you? We should get back to making this a regular thing.”

  Jackie concealed her anger as they chatted. She listened to Megan go on about the drama in the English department for ten minutes before Jackie couldn’t take it anymore and had to say what she was here to say.

  “Megan, you know I don’t like confrontation but… We have a problem.”

  Jackie retrieved the brown envelope from her bag containing six photos of Megan in a very compromising position. She slid it across the wooden table.

  “What’s this?” Megan asked, taking a sip of her coffee.

  “Just open it.”

  Jackie eyes watched Megan cautiously open the envelope, slowly taking them out. Megan hadn’t even fully removed them before she jammed them back into the envelope.

  “I uh,” Megan said with a weak smile. “I didn’t think you still had these… Are you finally interested in this? Five years later?” Megan asked, her eyes meeting Jackie’s.

  “Not exactly.”

  “What then?”

  “I’d like to call a truce,” Jackie said in a serious tone. “I know you sent a threatening email to Cameron Lucas. I can’t believe that you did… I didn’t think that you hated me that much but anyway, here we are. If you don’t back off, those photos are getting leaked.”

  “You think I hate you?”

  “Yes. Why else would you do that? You made my life and hers miserable for the last few months…”

  “I did it because I’m crazy about you and I wanted you back.”

  Jackie’s eyebrows rose.

  “I showed up on your doorstep on Christmas,” Megan said softly. “I remembered that you said you usually spend the night on your own. I had a bottle of wine. I thought we could catch up. And there you were, kissing a woman who looked a lot younger than you. It took me a few days, but I figured out who she was.”

  “You had no rite,” Jackie said, her jaw stiff with anger.

  “You shouldn’t have slept with a student.”

  Jackie looked around her. Their conversation was getting a little too loud for a public place.

  “Look, we’re both screwed if either of these things go public,” Jackie said, pushing a lock of her black hair behind her ear. “Let’s just call it even. Leave Cam alone and I’ll make sure no one ever sees these photos.”

  Jackie waited for Megan to say something. Her eyes were cold, emotionless.

  “Okay,” Megan said finally.

  Jackie nodded and pushed back her chair. “I’m sorry that it had to come down to this but obviously, I don’t want to see you again. Ever.”

  Jackie slung her bag over her shoulder, leaving the envelope with the photos sitting on the table in front of Megan, and left the coffee shop.

  Chapter 36

  Cam couldn’t sit still while Jackie was gone. She tried to think of something productive she could do, organize her emails or delete old photos from her phone but she couldn’t concentrate on anything.

  She kept wondering how Jackie was doing? What if this whole thing backfired and they couldn’t be together? Not until Cam had graduated, anyway, and what were the chances that Jackie would wait for her? That was too much to ask.

  Jackie had been gone for almost an hour and Cam was wondering if things weren’t going to plan.

  Cam stood up and put her phone back in the front pocket of her jeans. Maybe she should just leave? She didn’t know how she could be here if Jackie came back with bad news.

  Cam would have to say goodbye, putting that space between them again and Cam knew she wouldn’t be able to handle it.

  Jackie opened the front door just as Cam started walking towards it, ready to run from all this.

  “How’d it go?” Cam asked.

  “We’re free,” Jackie said, almost glowing, as her lips moved into a smile.

  “Really?”

  Cam crossed the room, wrapping her arms around Jackie.

  “Yes,” Jackie said, leaning back so that she could look into Cam’s eyes. “As free as we can be anyway. We’re still walking a fine line… I need to talk to Linda, see if there’s any way that this could be okay now that you’re not in any of my classes.”

  “But I probably will be next year.”

  “I can’t think about next year,” Jackie said with a lopsided smile. “Not yet, anyway,” she said, cupping Cam’s cheek. “Right now, I just want to kiss you.”

  Cam’s hand slid from Jackie’s shoulder up to her neck, pulling her into an emotional kiss. She could feel tears welling up in her eyes as her lips parted against Jackie’s.

  She couldn’t even allow herself to dream of this in the last few weeks. It hurt too much to think about what might have been, to remember the way their lips seemed to fit together so perfectly.

  Cam broke their kiss, breathless, resting her forehead against Jackie. “I’m so sorry,” she breathed.

  “Shh… Megan’s my crazy ex,” Jackie said softly. “You have nothing to apologize for.”

  “I missed you so much.”

  “I know… I thought I was going to have some sort of a breakdown,” Jackie said, her lips finding Cam’s again, brushing across them lightly, her arms still wrapped around Cam.

  “I know we still have to be careful,” Cam said, breaking their kiss. “But I’d like to pick up where we left off… If you still want to…”

  Cam swallowed as she took a step back
, waiting for Jackie’s response.

  “You have no idea how much I want to,” Jackie said, pulling Cam back into her, her hand resting on Cam’s cheek as she dipped her head, finding Cam’s lips again.

  Cam sighed as Jackie’s lips met hers. She couldn’t remember ever being this happy.

  Jackie’s hand slid around her waist, keeping her close as Cam’s hands rested at the nape of her neck. Cam moaned softly as Jackie’s tongue met hers in a slow, sensual dance.

  Cam felt like she could finally relax. The worry of the last few months was already starting to drift away.

  Cam broke their kiss, meeting Jackie’s stunning green eyes. “I thought I’d get to say this in New York… And I don’t want to wait any longer… I love you, Jackie.”

  Jackie’s eyes pooled with tears and she blinked them back. “I love you too,” she said, leaning in to find her lips again. “We’ll figure this out… I promise.”

  Epilogue

  September

  Spring and summer had come and gone. Now, Cam was back at college, ready to start her second year.

  She’d played softball on Kayla’s and Jackie’s team, picking up where she’d left off last summer. It didn’t take Kayla long to figure out what was going on. Neither Cam or Jackie could hide their feelings.

  She’d had to win Linda over, but it was worth it. Not only was she one of Jackie’s closest friends but she’d helped them figure out what to do about their situation.

  They’d talked it through one summer’s evening over a bottle of wine, going through all of the ways that they could handle this. Linda had thought that they’d be better off coming forward with their relationship.

  She thought it made sense for Jackie to say that their relationship had started in January when Cam wasn’t her student. The college frowned upon professors dating their students, but Linda was almost positive that if they came forward before the school year started, they’d be okay, even though Jackie would be her professor in September.

  Linda was right. Jackie made her case, reasoning that she always graded her papers without knowing who wrote them until after the fact. She’d been asking students to attach a cover letter for years so that she could turn over the first page of all the papers sitting on her desk and then grade them based on the content and not the student.