Totally Inevitable Intent

by Michele Lenard

  Tasting someone, sharing their breath, is about as intimate an experience you can share with another person, so yeah, I’ve avoided kissing for years, because I didn’t have a desire to get that close to anyone. But Jen’s different. I like her, and I’m curious about what it would be like to get closer to her. So I kissed her, and that kiss is imprinted on me in ways I never thought possible.

  All I want is a repeat, but it’s not until late afternoon that I can break away from Colt's project. When I get to Jen's I find her in the garage just like yesterday, and once again all I can do is stare. Her hair is piled loosely on her head, cheeks flushed, and she's bent over, those shapely legs on full display, teasing my eyes to wander higher. She’s easily the most gorgeous woman I’ve ever seen, despite being a little dirty and glistening with sweat after a long day’s work. It adds to her earthy appeal. She’s priming the cabinets with precise strokes, her movements deliberate. I find her focus incredibly sexy, and I while I want to scoop her up and kiss her senseless, I can’t bring myself to interrupt. But too soon the moment is shattered.

  “Mom,” a girl says as she comes around the corner of the garage. She startles a bit when she sees me but presses on. “Dad’s not answering. I need you to take me.”

  “Sawyer, I have to…oh, hi.” Jen smiles when she turns and sees me. The urge to touch her is painful, but I know better than to approach with her daughter watching. We haven’t had time to discuss what we’re telling our kids about us or what we’re comfortable doing or saying in front of them, and until we do, I don’t want to make any assumptions, especially since their parents having a date would be new for both of them.

  “Hi.” I smile back, hoping my voice sounds level.

  “Um, Sawyer, this is Anthony. He’s in charge of the project. Anthony this is my daughter, Sawyer.”

  I hold my hand out, and Sawyer cautiously takes it. “Nice to meet you,” I greet her.

  “You, too,” she says, giving my hand a firm shake just as her mother had done when we first met. But that seems to be one of few similarities. Sawyer has the same light olive skin as her mother, but her hair is a dark chestnut instead of black and her eyes a pretty green. She’s taller than Jen, too, and Jen isn’t exactly short, so her father must be pretty big. There’s a slightly exotic quality about her that she shares with her mother, and just like Jen, she stands straight and proud. She’s a beautiful young girl, so Jen is bound to have her hands full once the boys notice, if they haven’t already.

  Jen watches us with interest, most likely curious about Sawyer’s reaction to me, but as far as I can tell, she doesn’t have one. I’m just the guy working with her mom, and if she picks up on the electricity between us, she doesn’t comment.

  Jen is the first to move, bagging her paintbrush to keep it from drying out and picking up my sketchbook. “I picked one,” she says triumphantly, coming to stand next to me. She’s just tall enough that the top of her head almost reaches my chin, and I can smell the faint hint of coconut in her shampoo. Damn, she smells good.

  “So soon?” I raise my eyebrows in mock surprise. “I thought you’d need at least a week.”

  “I told you I’d be done by today, and I am. Want to see?” Her eyes sparkle.

  “Of course,” I answer.

  Jen flips to the page with the arbor designs and picks one that was constructed with gnarled limbs instead of flat boards, giving it a more rustic appearance. “This one. I think it would blend into the yard better than something more structured.”

  Her pick is my favorite, too, and I’m secretly glad she picked it. It will be more fun to build. “I agree. But finding those materials will be tough. It might be easier to just go for a hike and see what’s available outdoors.”

  “Ooh, I love that idea. It makes it a more personal gift if we find the materials ourselves.” She turns to Sawyer and points at the design she picked. “Don’t you like that one?”

  Sawyer peers at the page and nods. “That looks like Lisa.”

  “I thought so, too,” Jen says as she turns to me. “But that doesn’t look anything like the samples I sent you. What made you do a rustic version?”

  “You said you wanted it to be something they could keep in their yard, and I thought this might fit. Plus, I remodeled Chris’s house, and I know his style is a hybrid of rustic and modern, so I figured hers might be, too.”

  “Well, you nailed it,” Jen says, looking up at me. “This will be perfect.”

  “Mom, practice starts in thirty minutes, and I have to be there at least ten minutes early to warm up,” Sawyer interrupts. “I need a ride.”

  “Sawyer, I told you I have to go meet Lisa to help her with some wedding details. I can’t reschedule this. I don’t know why your dad didn’t to take you straight to the school, but I can’t do it. You’ll have to come with me.”

  “But Mom, I can’t miss practice.”

  “It’s not practice.” Jen throws her hands in the air. “It’s an optional running club. No one will hold it against you if you don’t go.”

  “But I need to practice as much as I can if I want to make the varsity team in the fall,” Sawyer protests.

  Jen glances in my direction, seemingly embarrassed. “Sorry. Schedules kind of got mixed up tonight.”

  “It’s no problem. Can I help?”

  “No, it’s fine.”

  “Does she just need to get to the school?” I ask. “I can drop her on my way home.”

  “Yes, can you?” Sawyer jumps at my offer. I look to Jen. I maybe shouldn’t have put her on the spot like that, but I wanted to help. Besides, if I’m going to see more of Jen, it only makes sense for me to get to know Sawyer a bit, too.

  “Are you sure?” Jen asks. “I don’t want you to go out of your way.”

  Actually, what I really wanted to do was crush Jen up against the wall and kiss the hell out of her, but if she has plans, then I’m glad to help her out of a bind. “I’m sure. It’s not out of the way at all.”

  “Okay, thank you.” She smiles, her eyes lingering on mine just a fraction longer than they should have in front of her daughter. “Sawyer, go get your bag out of my car.”

  “Thank you,” Sawyer calls as she bounds off, leaving Jen and I alone.

  “I’m sorry about this, I don’t know…” Jen starts, but before she can finish, I pull her to me and crush my mouth to hers to taste those sweet lips. I couldn’t physically wait any more, and it’s only because I’m able to satisfy that craving that I feel like I can finally breathe.

  “I’ve been wanting to do that all day,” I growl. “I’m sorry I couldn’t get here earlier.”

  “I’m sorry I have to leave so soon.” She kisses me back.

  I brush my finger across her cheek. “Hike Saturday?” I ask. “We can look for things to make the arbor, and I can have you all to myself with no interruptions.”

  “I’d like that.” She nods.

  “Okay. I better go before your daughter catches us in a compromising position.” I kiss her softly. “Have fun tonight.”

  “Thank you,” she breathes, giving me one last, tender kiss before I go.

  I turn and jog down the drive just as Sawyer shuts the door to her mom’s car. I’m not sure what Jen may or may not have said about me, so I’m hoping this little jog down the driveway will help explain my breathlessness.

  I nod toward my truck. “Hop in.” I open the door.

  “I like your truck,” she says as I climb in.

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah.”

  “What do you like about it?” I ask, for lack of anything better to talk about. I should have realized before I offered to help that I have literally nothing to say to a teenage girl. This will be interesting.

  “The grill. The tires. The lift.”

  I feel my eyebrows shoot up toward my hair. “You noticed all that?”

  “Yeah, my aunt Lisa likes trucks, and she’s always pointing out nice ones.”

  “I didn’t know that abou
t Lisa, but now that I do, I’m sure the rustic-looking arbor is definitely the way to go.”

  “You know her?” Sawyer sounds surprised.

  “I’ve met her. But I’ve worked with Chris for years.”

  “Oh right. That's how you ended up working with my mom.”

  “Actually, my son Wes is doing most of the work, but I do stop by every day to see how things are going.”

  “But there wasn’t anyone else there today.”

  “They were there this morning. We’re sort of stuck until the plumber finishes his work, so I let them go early. Do you have a summer job?”

  “I babysit sometimes. Mostly just in the neighborhood. It’s hard to have a job when someone else has to drive you to it. Thanks again for taking me to practice.”

  “I’m glad I could help. So, how’d you get into running?” I ask.

  “Mom said I had to do something at school, like a club or a team, and I wasn’t sure what to try. I think she meant cheerleading, but I couldn’t see myself getting people excited about a sport I don’t even like, so I tried running.”

  “Do you run because you have to or because you like to?” I ask.

  “I like to. It’s peaceful.” She plays with the strap of her bag.

  “My wife used to say that,” I volunteer, and I’m momentarily shocked to realize it didn’t even hurt to say. I smile.

  “You’re married?” Sawyer’s jaw drops.

  I glance sideways at her, surprised by her tone. “Widowed,” I answer softly.

  “Oh. Sorry.” She blushes and looks down at the bag sitting in her lap. “I didn’t mean to sound so shocked.”

  And then it hits me. She’s offended on her mom’s behalf. She must have seen us. I feel terrible about being so careless, because I never intended to put Jen or Sawyer in an awkward situation. And now, because I hadn’t been thinking, my first conversation with Sawyer has started down a path I’m not ready for. I have no idea what to say next. We ride in silence for a few minutes, me with my eyes on the road, her fiddling with her bag.

  “Um, do you want to take my mom out?” Sawyer glances at me briefly then looks back at her bag.

  I still didn’t know what to say. I nod, almost imperceptibly.

  “Okay.” Sawyer chews on her lip.

  I hesitate a moment. “You’d be okay with that?”

  “I guess.”

  On the surface, this is great news; Sawyer seems to be giving me permission. But I’m so out of practice in this area I still don’t know how to react. Do I say thank you? Do I reassure her that I’m not trying to replace her dad or take her mom away from her?

  I settle on, “I’m not really sure how this works. I haven’t really dated since my wife died, and I’m afraid I’m going to mess it up.”

  “She’s pretty easy to please. Just follow through on what you say, and you’ll be fine.”

  “That’s it? That doesn’t sound too difficult.”

  “You’d be surprised.”

  “Sounds like you have some experience with that,” I venture.

  “It’s why my parents split up. Dad’s unreliable. Plus, he has too many girlfriends.”

  Again, I’m at a loss for words. Sawyer said that so matter-of-factly I’m not sure if it bothers her or not. So I ask her.

  “Does that bother you?”

  “I’m kind of used to it by now. What bothers me is they aren’t much older than I am.”

  “Really? That’s…”

  “Creepy,” she supplies.

  “I suppose. So, if I have your permission to ask your mom out, does that mean I’m age appropriate?” I relax a bit, now that we seem to be talking openly.

  “You seem to be.” She studies me. “How old are you?”

  “Isn’t that a question you aren’t supposed to ask someone you just met?” I laugh.

  “You can’t answer a question with a question,” she states. “Besides, you want to go out with my mom. I think I’m allowed to ask questions.”

  “Touché.” I chuckle. Sawyer is proving to be just as witty as her mom. She seems like a good kid, and since I really want to take her mom out, I’ll indulge her. “I’m thirty-four. Do I pass?”

  “That’s totally acceptable.” She nods.

  “Good, because I wanted to take your mom hiking Saturday to pick out some branches for that arbor. Is she available?”

  “Probably,” Sawyer says. “You can ask her.”

  “Actually, I have a confession to make.” I rub my jaw. “I sort of already did. But I’ll be sure to ask you first next time.”

  Sawyer laughs, and I get the feeling we are off to a great start.

  ***

  It’s just before nine a.m. when Jen throws the front door open, grabs my shirt, and pulls me toward her to mumble good morning against my lips. The kiss quickly turns intense because I haven’t kissed her in a few days, and after that first time, I discovered that I really, really like kissing her. But I pull back because if I don’t, we’ll never get to our hike.

  “Morning,” I finally reply, running my fingers through her silky hair.

  “Where are you taking me today?” Her eyes sparkle.

  “Bailey. My friend has some property up there, and he’s going to let us root around and see what we can find.”

  “We’re not hiking?” She looks confused.

  “Of course we are. Just not on a state trail. I know people take souvenirs from those trails all the time, but that’s a huge problem that destroys the trail. My buddy has some brush that needs clearing, so we can take what we want and help him with his fire mitigation at the same time.”

  Jen nods in understanding. “Okay. I have to finish getting my stuff together. It’ll just take a minute. Come in.”

  I step inside and take a seat on the couch while she goes into the kitchen. While I wait, I look around the room, taking in the wood floors, the elegant baseboards, and the crown molding. Jen really does have a knack for restoration.

  As I’m studying the room, Sawyer comes down the stairs and plops in the chair across from me, dressed for a run.

  “Practice today?” I ask.

  “Nothing official. I’m just going to do a few miles to loosen up.”

  “How many miles is a few?”

  “I’ll see how I feel. Maybe eight or nine.”

  I stifle a laugh. “My wi…Katie used to say the same thing. I guess ‘a few’ has a different definition for runners than it does for non-runners.”

  She looks at me curiously. “What’s your definition of a few?”

  “Two,” I answer without hesitation.

  “That’s only a warm-up.” Sawyer wrinkles her nose. “You’re barely doing anything if you stop at two.”

  “For me, two is an eternity.”

  “You don’t just get lost in the motion of running and let your mind wander?” she marvels.

  “All I can think about when I run is how much longer until I can stop,” I tell her honestly. She looks at me as though I’m some sort of alien.

  “Don’t couples usually do their stuff together? I mean, if your…Katie was a runner, didn’t you do that with her?”

  It strikes me then that Sawyer has no idea what it’s like to be in a couple. Her dad’s parade of girlfriends must insist on doing everything together if she has that impression.

  “Couples do lots of stuff together, yeah, but they can have their own interests, too. We didn’t run together often because I hated it, but we both liked to ski, so we did that together.”

  She seems to consider this as Jen comes in from the kitchen swinging a backpack. “All set,” she announces. We say our goodbyes to Sawyer and head out to the truck. As Jen’s climbing in, she asks, “How do you know so much about trails and stuff?”

  I consider her question as I back out of the drive. “I think part of it is growing up here and being taught about those things from an early age. And the other part is watching some of the places I love get destroyed by overuse or people just not respe
cting what’s around them.”

  “And that’s happening here?” she asks as we settle into what will be about a thirty-minute drive.

  “Yes. It happens when an area gets bombarded with a lot of people in a short amount of time, and they naturally want to explore, but when they do it, they’re careless.”

  “How do you mean?”

  “Well, take Hanging Lake for example. Ever been?” She shakes her head no. “It’s a crystal blue lake perched right on the side of a mountain, almost like its hanging over the edge. It’s one of the most amazing places I’ve ever seen, but it gets so much traffic you now have to make an appointment to hike it.”

  “An appointment? Really?”

  “Yeah. So many people were hiking it that the trail couldn’t contain the volume, so it kept getting wider and wider. When people don’t stick to the trail, they destroy the surrounding area, so first the whole area had to be shut down for restoration, and now you need an appointment to hike it.”

  “Why would you need to restore a trail? It’s just dirt.”

  “Well, this particular trail is pretty intense. There’s lots of climbing, and parts of it are rocky. If people don’t stick to the trail, they can erode the dirt around those rocks, and if those rocks come loose, people can get seriously injured.”

  “Oh. I guess I never realized. I’m sorry.”

  “Why are you apologizing?”

  “I’ve probably been one of those people who went off the trail.” She grimaces.

  I take her hand and bring it to my mouth for a quick kiss. “You don’t have to apologize, but I appreciate that you did.”

  “Why?”

  “You wouldn’t apologize unless you were sincere.” I shrug. “And now the next time you hike, you’ll teach other people to respect the trail.”

  I keep hold of her hand, and we ride in silence for a while, Jen taking in all the mountain views while I just enjoy the feel of her hand in mine. When we arrive at my friend’s cabin, Jen gets out to wander around while I hook a trailer up to the ATV and pull them out of the garage. I load a chainsaw and some branch cutters into the trailer then climb on, offering my hand to Jen.