At last, Laird turned back to face me, his hands braced behind him on the counter. “I… Anything you need, in this, Trudie, I’ll give to you. Genuinely. Just because you can do this alone doesn’t mean that you should. That’s how it is when you have people who love you. They support you and they help you. I know how to handle lawyers, I know how to handle police, I can take care of this with you so that you don’t have to feel alone. And I know that Jack and Red and Edith—and anyone else you know—will feel the same. You’re a good person and we want to make sure you’re taken care of.”
My chest felt warm. “Thank you. That really does mean a lot, you have no idea. I didn’t have anyone for such a long time and I know that it was Pete’s fault but it’s hard not to… not to get used to that. And to forget how to have people in your life and how to make friends.”
Laird smiled at me. “I hope that despite all of the chaos that we are friends.”
I didn’t want to be friends—I wanted to be so much more. Again, my thoughts must’ve shown on my face, because Laird’s smile fell. I had gotten so good at hiding my thoughts and feelings from Pete while I’d planned to get away. Had I just forgotten how to do that because I felt safe with Laird? Or did he really just know me that well?
“You’ve been nothing but kind to me,” I told him. “How could I see you as anything less? And I know the money is… but I don’t want to keep it, honestly, you can take it back… if you’re already doing all of this…”
Laird shook his head. “No. You’ve got dreams and goals and you’re not going to get them without that financial help. Pete took years away from you, years where you could’ve been going to college, getting a home, finding a better job. This is me helping to correct that. I can do it, so I want to. I want to help… reset the universe. I can’t give you back that time, but I can help make up for it.”
“You’re the most generous person I’ve ever met,” I blurted out. “Honestly.”
Laird got an odd look on his face. “I… the thing is, I’m really not. I am… generous, yes, or at least I try to be. But do you really think I would give that much money to just anyone? That I would do all of this for just anyone who needed it?”
“Maybe not quite this much, but you’d do a lot. I know you would.”
“But not this much,” Laird said, echoing me, and it felt like he was trying to tell me something extremely important, something I was missing.
Laird pushed himself off the counter and walked over to where I was still sitting, slowly dropping to his knees. For a wild second I felt like he was proposing, but of course he wasn’t doing that. Why would he?
Instead, he took my hands, squeezing them gently, and then kissed my knuckles. My heart caught in my throat. Call me naïve, say I had low self-esteem, call me oblivious, and you would be right about all of it. But I wasn’t so dense as to miss this. This wasn’t how you treated someone you only saw as a friend or a fuckbuddy.
“I’m doing all of this not because I’m generous,” Laird whispered, his eyes gently boring into mine, “but because I’m in love with you.”
My heart felt like it stopped.
30
Laird
I just couldn’t hold it in anymore. Selfish or not, illogical or not, I just couldn’t. My behavior was becoming so obvious that it would’ve been an insult for me to not share with her how I felt. She was going to figure it out eventually and I might as well go down honorably, so to speak, and tell her what I was feeling before she guessed it and everyone was embarrassed.
And there. I’d said it. Now she knew. No matter how much I donated to charity or tried to help others, no matter how much I wanted to give people a leg up and support those who needed it… none of it was the level that I would give to Trudie. I’d do anything for her. I’d give her whatever she needed, go to the ends of the earth if that was what was needed.
Trudie stared down at me, and I realized how ridiculous I probably looked, on my knees in front of her like some kind of supplicant. She had to be alarmed by my behavior.
And then the shock cleared from Trudie’s face, and I saw tears start up in her eyes. “I… you love me?”
“Oh, no.” I’d upset her. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.” I stood up. “There, there, sweetheart, don’t cry.” I pulled her into my arms automatically, and it was only after I’d done it that I realized that might not be what she wanted. But when I tried to pull away, Trudie clung to me.
I pet her hair. “It’s all right, my love, it’s all right. I’m always here for you, no matter how you feel. I don’t want to force anything on you. I don’t want you to feel like you… owe me anything because I’m helping you. You don’t, you don’t owe me anything.”
Trudie sobbed into my chest for a moment, and then pulled back, looking up at me—and, to my surprise, smiling. Almost in disbelief. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry to be such a mess but I—I’m just happy, I didn’t think you would ever want to be with someone like me, someone who was so… I know that I have baggage and I’m just a barista and I never thought with all that you’ve done, and all that you’ve experienced in your life, and—you could have anyone you wanted, and so I thought… how could you ever…”
She cleared her throat and tried to gather herself together. “I love you. That’s what I’m trying to say. I love you, too, I’ve been in love with you for such… I don’t know how long, I don’t know when it began exactly but I love you.”
I could hardly believe her for a moment. It seemed too good to be true. It felt like something that I couldn’t quite believe. “You… are you sure about that, love?”
“You’re asking me if I’m sure?” Trudie laughed. “I should be asking you that!”
“You love me,” I repeated.
“Yes.” Trudie nodded. “I love you.”
I couldn’t hold back any longer. I pulled her up to standing and drew her to me, kissing her over and over again, diving into her, soft and smiling. I could hardly believe it, she loved me too, we could be together—nothing could stop us.
Well, there was going to be some awkwardness when I explained to my parents that this was my girlfriend, Trudie, and not my wife, Trudie, but I was sure they’d forgive me. It was only fair that they got what they deserved for lying and putting me in such an awkward position, and since it was how I’d met the woman I was now in love with (the woman I fully intended to marry properly one day), there really couldn’t be too much complaining.
We kissed again and again, sliding to the floor, our hands roaming everywhere. Not like I was groping her, but like we were just… finally getting the chance to feel, to revel in the feeling. It wasn’t just sex anymore. We didn’t have to pretend that it was. We could be honest about how it was being in love.
God, I wanted to make love to her right there, on the floor or on the kitchen table. I wanted to kiss her everywhere. I wanted to drag her to bed and not let her out for days. I wanted to—
My cell phone rang.
I cursed colorfully as Trudie laughed. “It’s Jack,” I said, seeing the caller I.D. on the phone. “The fucker—that bastard better have a bloody good reason for calling and interrupting.”
“You know what the great thing is?” Trudie said, still clearly amused. “We don’t have to be mad about being interrupted. Because we can do this anytime. We can have each other anytime.”
I stared at her, the phone still ringing. “You’re right,” I admitted. It was true. We could sleep together, kiss, do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted. Nothing was going to tear us apart.
Grinning at her, I answered the phone. “Hey, Jack, how’re you doing?”
“Somebody sounds chipper,” Jack said, sounding a little wary. “What did you do?”
“I didn’t do anything.” Or anyone, technically. Not yet, anyway. “What’s got you all in a twist?”
“It’s not that I’m in a twist, it’s more that I’m concerned. Red came to see me just now. He said that there’s this guy who’s lurk
ing around, and he told me he thinks the guy might be Trudie’s shitty ex-boyfriend. I didn’t know that she had an ex? But apparently she does and he’s the worst. Red wanted to tell you but you aren’t here so he told me and I figured I’d call.”
“Thanks. Y’know what, do me a favor, call the police and have them come and arrest the guy. I’m going to head over with Trudie. We’re taking care of this right now.”
I could hear Jack’s smile—it wasn’t his usual carefree smile, but the one that he got when he was about to deal with some fucker who’d just tried to screw us. We’d dealt with people trying to pull one over on us throughout the years. Every business ran into that at some point. I could hear that smile in his tone now, and I grinned in response, even though Jack couldn’t see me. “I can’t wait to hear all about this,” Jack said.
“Trust me, you will,” I promised, and I hung up.
“What’s going on?” Trudie asked as I put the phone in my pocket.
“We’re going to the police station,” I said. “Pete’s been hanging around the coffee shop, and Red was worried so he spoke to Jack about it. I told him to call the police and have the guy picked up. We’re going to file charges and we’re doing it today, before that fucker gets one more day of making you worried.”
Trudie stared at me, a blush rising to her cheeks. “Are you sure? Are you sure that this is the best thing?”
“If you’d rather not be there…”
“No, no, I want to be there.” Trudie stood resolutely. “I want to take care of this once and for all. I want to stop have to worrying about him. I want him to get what he deserves. He’s made me feel so… so scared this whole time and he put me on the run. He’s taken over so much of my life already. He doesn’t get to own anymore of it.”
I nodded. “You’re a brave woman,” I told her. “You really are.” I took her hand. “Let’s deal with this bastard once and for all.”
Trudie smiled at me, but there was steel in that smile and I could tell that she was determined. I was so proud of her. “Yes. Let’s do this.”
We got to my office just in time for the police to show up. I’d found, in my limited experience, that the police always took so much longer to arrive than everyone expected. Same with ambulances and fire trucks. It was why it was so important to know how to do CPR and things like that because you just sort of… automatically expected the people to show up the moment you called them, to come screaming around the corner in under a minute, and usually it took ten minutes and you were panicking the whole time. Especially for something that wasn’t a murder, something that wasn’t gang violence—the police felt they could put it on the back burner.
As Trudie and I approached, she tensed up beside me. The police were stepping out of their car and addressing a tall, thin man, with hair that was so blond and flat it looked like a mound of straw on his head. He was arguing with the officers, and the closer we got, the more Trudie shrank against my side.
I put my arm around her. “It’s all right,” I soothed her. “It’s okay. He won’t hurt you. I’ve got you.” I would die, or kill, before I let Pete hurt her again. And bugger the police.
Jack emerged from Buzz, with Red behind him, the two of them speaking to the police and nodding along as the police replied.
One of the officers saw us and turned. “Are you Trudie…”
“Harris,” Trudie said, finishing for him. “Yes, that’s me.”
“Will you be pressing charges?”
“You.” The word was spat out of Pete’s mouth and he glared at Trudie with such anger and vitriol that I almost lunged forward and strangled the fucker on the spot. How dare he look at her that way, how dare he speak to her like that!?
“Me,” Trudie said simply, and her voice didn’t shake at all. I was incredibly proud of her for that.
“You’re arresting me!?” Pete sounded incredulous. “I can’t believe this. And what the fuck, why—you dyed your hair!?”
Personally, I thought Trudie looked good as a blonde, but when she’d told me that she was originally a brunette, I’d been excited to see that as well. I’d always had a bit of a soft spot for brunettes. But it was Trudie’s choice to look how she liked, and that included her hair color—and I thought she looked damn good as a blonde. Or even if she’d dyed it blue. She would still be beautiful, and she would still be herself.
“Stay back,” Trudie said, ignoring the hair comment. “You need to stay away, Pete. I mean it. I’ll be getting a restraining order.”
“You’ll be—oh you’ve got to be kidding me.” I could see that Pete was caught off his guard by being surrounded, and with the police here. “I can’t believe you would do this. After all we’ve been through together and all that we’ve shared. This woman—practically my wife—steals a bunch of money and runs away, what was I supposed to do?”
“File a missing persons report,” one of the officers suggested, obviously unimpressed.
“How did you even find me?” Trudie demanded, losing her cool a little. “You can’t—get away from me. This is going to happen and you can’t prevent it. So stop trying to lie, and stop trying to sugarcoat things and sweet talk, and get away from me.”
A snarl passed over Pete’s face. “You,” he hissed, “are a horrible, lying little snake. After all that I did for you, you’re having me arrested. Arrested!”
He lunged for her. “You can’t escape me! You’re mine! You’re mine and you’re going to always be mine!”
Two police officers grabbed him and yanked him back, holding his arms so that Pete couldn’t get to her. I shoved Trudie behind me, protecting her, keeping her from being touched by Pete. I cocked my fist back automatically, and I noticed that Jack and Red both took steps forward as well, as if they were ready to jump in and land a few blows as well.
“That’s enough,” one of the officers said. They started to lead a struggling Pete towards the car. He was putting up a hell of a fight, but he eventually was shoved into the car, and I couldn’t resist smirking at him a little in triumph.
“You’ll want to come down to the station with us,” one of the other officers said, turning to look at Trudie. “You’ll need to give a statement, fill out paperwork, make it all legal and aboveboard.”
“Of course.” Trudie nodded. “I… I have a confession to make, but I forged my legal papers so that I could escape him. I’ll have to… get that all sorted out. I was scared he would follow me.”
“Rightfully so, it seems,” the officer replied. He sighed. “Well, you’ll have to pay some fines, but given the circumstances I’m sure nobody will want to convict you of anything. You’ll just have to sort it out at the precinct.”
Trudie nodded, apparently ready to take her medicine. “It won’t be a problem, thank you officer,” I said quickly.
I’d pay any fines that were needed, and I’d get her a lawyer or anything else that she needed. She had been fleeing for her life, and rightfully so. If she hadn’t changed her name and her documents, who knew how quickly Pete would’ve found her? The fact that it had taken this long was probably due to the fact that she’d gotten these forged papers in the first place. I was proud of her for thinking to do that. I thought it showed good planning and foresight on her part.
My girlfriend—my girlfriend—was a clever woman. I still couldn’t quite believe that Trudie was my girlfriend, that it was actually real now. I grinned down at her encouragingly and squeezed her shoulders. “We’ll get this all sorted out, don’t worry.”
I drove us to the station and I was glad to see that the officers kept Pete well away from Trudie. We had to go in and fill out a statement and take care of paperwork, and I insisted that I would take care of the fees. The police seemed eager to help us and were kind and solicitous to Trudie—although that might’ve been because I was standing there glowering and waving a lot of money around.
“Can you hold him?” I asked, because I knew that Trudie would be too shy to ask. I wanted to make sure that Pete wouldn
’t come near Trudie while we waited for all of the paperwork to come through.
The officer helping us out nodded. “Oh, yes, sir. For stalking first and foremost. We can also get him on loitering, if that’s not enough.”
“Thank you,” I said, and I meant it.
Jack insisted on accompanying us, including back to the apartment. “I want to hear everything, and then we need to have a drink to celebrate!”
“Are you sure?” I asked. I wanted Trudie to myself, even if I suspected we wouldn’t be having sex that night. She was going to be too emotionally drained, my poor love. And who could blame her? The man who’d abused her for years had just appeared back in her life and had tried to attack her just now.
“Of course.” Jack grinned. “And you two can tell me how you finally figured your shit out, don’t try and deny it.”
Trudie laughed. “Oh no, were we really that obvious?”
“Terribly.” Jack smiled at the both of us, his face gentling. “But despite the asshole who just tried to interrupt everything, you two seem so much happier than you were before. I want details, spare nothing.”
I laughed, looking at Trudie. “What do you think, love? Should we tell him?”
She smiled back at me. “I guess we might as well.”
31
Trudie
I woke up the next morning feeling like a whole new person.
We’d stayed up late last night talking with Jack as I’d filled him in on my past life, and then we explained what happened in Ireland and when I got back. He was fascinated by all of it and kept complimenting me, telling me how brave I was for what I’d gone through. He’d also kept teasing both of us on how long it had taken us to get together for real, how we’d both been dancing around it for long enough.
Forbidden First Times: A Contemporary Romance Collection Page 37
