Forbidden First Times: A Contemporary Romance Collection

by Sofia T Summers

  To my relief – and surprise – my mother shook her head. “Of course, I don’t mind,” she said. “You deserve it, honey. I don’t think you’re doing enough to keep yourself happy here. But are you sure that you want to go today? You’re looking a little peaked,” she said.

  I blushed. Even though I had been careful to check my neck for hickeys, the way my mom was looking at me made me feel like she was looking right through the excuse that I’d given her.

  “I’m fine,” I told her. “I just want to spend some time with Lilah, that’s all. But we don’t have to go right now,” I added.

  “Don’t worry about it,” Mom said. Her tone was so neutral that I wasn’t sure whether or not there was any kind of hidden meaning behind it. “Go ahead and have fun. This will keep,” she added. “We can have BLTs for dinner, yes?”

  “Sounds good,” I said, trying to keep my voice as light as possible. “Thanks again.”

  I took Lilah by the hand and led her outside, debating whether to walk around the block once or twice before going to Elliot’s. That didn’t last long – I thought of my mother looking out the windows and nearly had a heart attack. As I led her across the yard, Lilah chattered a mile a minute.

  “What’s brunch, Mommy? Is it fun? Is it like when Nana makes breakfast for me and I have to eat it before school? Where are we going? Why aren’t we taking the car,” she chirped, bouncing along in her Velcro sneakers beside me on the sidewalk.

  “We’re actually just going next door,” I told her, looking down at her little face. Her green eyes scrutinized my expression with more perception than I would have thought a toddler capable of, and I took a deep breath, still feeling complete and utter disbelief that I was about to introduce my daughter to her father.

  “Why, Mommy?”

  “I promise, honey, you’ll have fun,” I said. “Now, come on. Let’s go have brunch.”

  Lilah pouted as we climbed the steps of Elliot’s front porch. When I knocked on the door, she hung back, clinging to my knees and hiding her face in my thighs. The door swung open, revealing Elliot. In his dark V-neck sweater and slacks, he looked so incredibly sexy that I had to stop myself from pouncing on him. His dark brown hair was brushed back from his forehead and he was smiling, showing off his even, white teeth.

  “Hi,” I mouthed over Lilah. Just the sight of Elliot’s handsome face was enough to make me break out in a wide grin, and I felt myself blushing as I reached down and rested my hand on Lilah’s head.

  “Hi, there,” Elliot said. He turned his attention to Lilah and squatted down until he was looking her right in the eyes. “Remember me, kiddo?”

  Lilah glanced up at me with apprehension.

  “It’s okay, honey,” I told her. “Remember when Elliot came over to Grandma’s house? We’re going to have brunch with him,” I said.

  “But ... why,” Lilah asked.

  “Because Elliot is really important to Mommy,” I said in a voice that was both gentle but firm. “And we’re going to be spending a lot of time with him soon.”

  “Okay, Mommy,” Lilah said.

  “I have something for you,” Elliot said. I raised my eyebrow at him, but his attention was fully focused on Lilah.

  As always, the mention of a present was enough to make Lilah squeal. She clapped her hands, suddenly forgetting all about her shyness, and jumped up and down.

  “Come in,” Elliot said. He stepped back from the front door and motioned for Lilah and myself to come in. As soon as I was inside, the smell of something delicious hit me.

  “Did you cook?” I asked.

  Elliot snorted. “You don’t need to sound so surprised,” he said, raising an eyebrow at me and smirking. “I’ve been known to step around the kitchen a time or two.”

  Our eyes met and of course, my mind went racing back to the moments that we’d shared in his kitchen – my sitting on his counter with my legs splayed and spread and Elliot’s mouth worshipping me. I blushed even harder as Elliot led Lilah and myself into the dining room, where the table was set for three. Two vases of flowers stood on each end of the table and I saw plates and plates of food. French toast and pancakes and waffles and biscuits and gravy. There were four different boxes of cereal, a pitcher of freshly-squeezed orange juice, and a large carafe of milk as well as a bottle of champagne. A steaming plate of bacon filled the air with a heavenly aroma and I had to swallow as a ravenous hunger came over me.

  By the time I had finished surveying the table and I turned back to Elliot, my mouth was hanging open.

  “Just how many people are you expecting to feed?” I asked in disbelief. “This is enough food for an army!”

  Elliot shrugged. For once, he looked quite humble and almost embarrassed.

  “I didn’t know what you’d be in the mood for,” he said. “And I wanted Lilah to have everything she wanted.”

  Knowing that he wanted to spoil our daughter, that he would spoil her absolutely and truly filled my heart with an aching kind of happiness that I had never felt before. It was almost painful, like a sting, and I smiled widely.

  “Wow!” Lilah gasped. She hopped up on a chair and looked around, practically drooling.

  “You didn’t have to do all of this, you know,” I said, reaching for Elliot’s hand and lacing my fingers with his.

  “I wanted to,” he said. He shrugged again. “Now, what can I get you to drink?”

  Ten minutes later, Lilah and I were sitting at the table. I had a mimosa in front of me and Lilah was sipping her orange juice and giggling like she’d never been so happy in her life. A coloring book was perched carefully next to her plate and she ate eggs with one hand while coloring with the other.

  “She looks really happy,” I said to Elliot under my breath. He leaned close, sending a wave of his cologne over me. A pang of arousal bloomed in my belly and I sighed happily. There we were, the three of us, eating in domestic bliss.

  It was all I had ever wanted, and I couldn’t believe that things had worked out this way.

  “She does,” Elliot agreed. He lifted his eyes from his plate and turned to me. “And how are you?”

  I smiled. “I’m even happier,” I told him. “I ... this is all so much, Elliot. Thank you.”

  Elliot nodded. Under the table, I felt his hand on my knee. It was somehow protective and reassuring and arousing all at the same time, and I had to bite inside of my mouth to keep from whimpering.

  “You know I’d do anything for you the two of you, right?” Elliot asked. He turned his eyes to Lilah and I watched a look of intense love and pride come over his face.

  I nodded. The truth was, until that moment, I didn’t think that I had been sure. I had still been so worried, so concerned that all of this was too good to be true, that although I knew I was in love with Elliot, I hadn’t really allowed myself to fall deeply enough for him.

  But now, honestly, I knew that I would. I knew that I could, that it would happen.

  And that there was nothing that could stop it.

  29

  Elliot

  As I sat at my dining room table with the love of my life and our daughter, I was overcome and overwhelmed with happiness – a strange, intense kind of happiness that I had never felt before. As good as being with Annie felt while we were alone together, being with her and Lilah at the same time felt even better.

  It felt like we were really a family.

  I had worried, before Annie had brought Lilah over, that things would be awkward. And the truth was, they weren’t exactly ... well, they weren’t exactly smooth. I kept checking on Lilah every few seconds, making sure that she was relaxed and happy.

  I had no idea how to tell her the truth – that I was her father – and I could tell by the slightly perplexed look in Annie’s eyes that she didn’t know how to do that, either.

  We’ll figure it out together, I thought as I reached across the table for Annie’s hand and laced my fingers with hers. No matter what, we’ll figure it out together.

>   After Annie, Lilah, and I had eaten far too much food, Annie settled Lilah in the living room with her new coloring book while she and I took care of the dishes in the kitchen.

  “How should we tell her?” I asked. “Do you think she’ll understand?”

  Annie held her finger to her lips, motioning for me to be quieter.

  “I think she will. She’s a smart little kid,” Annie said. She pressed her lips together. “But we’ve been alone together for so long that I don’t even know what she’ll say or feel. I don’t want her to feel threatened, you know? I don’t want her to feel that she has to worry about losing her connection with me.”

  I nodded. “I have to admit that I’m kind of clueless,” I said. “I’m not used to being around kids.” There was a beat and then I added: “Especially when they’re mine.”

  That, at least, got a chuckle out of Annie. She blushed and covered her mouth with both hands, then raised an eyebrow at me.

  “Well, to be honest, I was scared shitless when she was born,” Annie said in a low, quiet voice. “But I’ve gotten a lot better, I think. Being a parent can be really frightening sometimes.”

  I frowned. “How do you mean?”

  Annie swallowed. She stepped closer and I noticed that her pale cheeks were flushed. Her blonde curls were frizzy from the summer humidity outside and her eyes were as round as saucers, as big as I’d ever seen them before. Suddenly, a powerful urge came over me and I yearned to take her into my arms and kiss her. I loved her so much in that moment, for being open and honest and vulnerable with me. For admitting that she wasn’t perfect (although I’d always think that she was).

  For loving me, for daring to finally tell me about Lilah and invite me into both of their lives.

  I needed her now, more than ever. I knew that building relationships, especially with children, took time. But I was impatient for the future. I was impatient to see where things went and how quickly we could get there, how quickly we could all get used to being a normal family, a real family.

  It was funny. When I had been married before to Tamara, I’d wanted children. But I’d always thought of kids as being a nebulous aspect of my future – not something that I would actually achieve within the next five years. And the years kept coming but my attitude stayed the same.

  This time, I was determined to do it right.

  “I shouldn’t have said frightening, I guess,” Annie admitted. She set the last of the plates in the sink and smoothed her blonde hair with both of her pale, pretty hands. “But it’s different, you know? Like, it’s suddenly not just you that you have to worry about in the world. You have this little defenseless creature who depends on you for safety and security. And you have to put their needs ahead of your own, which can take some getting used to ... and I never even thought of myself as a selfish person,” she added.

  “I can understand that,” I said. “It’s ... sort of like being a manager, yes?”

  Annie burst out laughing. “Oh my gosh, you would say something like that,” she said. “And sort of, I guess, to answer your question. Except, it’s like being a manager and you never get to take a day off. Or a weekend off. It’s constant.” She swallowed and blushed a little, looking chastened. “I sound like I wasn’t happy being a single mom. I was, honest. But it wasn’t easy.”

  I reached out and put my hands on her shoulders, stepping close enough to smell the floral scent of her hair. It was the closest we’d been since she had first arrived and a shiver of dark lust pulsed through my body as I met her eyes with my own.

  “Except you’re not alone now,” I said softly. “You have me, Annie. You do. And you always will.”

  Annie gulped. I could see her pulse racing in her throat as she leaned in and pressed her soft lips to mine. She tasted like maple syrup and orange juice and I groaned quietly as Annie’s tongue slid into my mouth and tangled with my own. She wrapped her arms around my shoulders and pushed her curvy body against mine, driving me wild with desire.

  “We should stop,” Annie whispered, pulling away and pushing her forehead against mine. She was practically panting as I slid my hands down her body and cupped her ass, squeezing hard. Annie moaned gently and then kissed me again, with more force and passion than before. Rationally, in my head, I knew that I should step away from her – our daughter wasn’t twenty feet away! – but as always, being with Annie and kissing her was like a drug, a delicious drug that I had to take.

  Just as I was struggling to pull my lips away from hers, I heard the scampering sound of little footsteps. Annie leapt back, like she’d been scalded. Her cheeks were beet-red as she turned to the open door of the kitchen and saw Lilah standing.

  “Mommy, what are you doing?” Lilah asked.

  I held my breath for a moment as Annie turned to me, wide-eyed and panicked.

  Well, it’s now or never, I suppose, I thought as I gave a brief jerk of my head.

  Annie cleared her throat and squatted down to one knee. “Sweetheart, come here,” she said, patting her round thigh.

  The air was tense and charged as Lilah approached her mother, pouting, with her little forehead creased.

  “Mommy,” Lilah said again, her voice creeping closer to a whine. “What’s going on?”

  I cleared my throat. “Lilah, sweetheart,” I said. “I’m very close friends with your mom, you know that, right?”

  Lilah shrugged. “I guess so,” she said. She eyed me with a touch of wariness in her green eyes that so perfectly mirrored my own.

  “And I have something to tell you, honey,” Annie chimed in. She glanced up at me for affirmation before continuing and I nodded again, hoping that the brief gesture would reassure her. For extra support, I put my hand on her shoulder.

  “What is it?” Lilah’s expression softened and suddenly, she looked more curious than skeptical.

  “Elliot is your daddy, sweetheart,” Annie said.

  Lilah was silent for a moment, then she bit her lower lip.

  “I have a daddy?” The tone of her voice was so touching, so sweet, that it nearly broke my heart.

  “Yes, sweetheart,” Annie said.

  Lilah turned to me, with her chin quivering and her eyes huge. For a moment, I wondered if she was going to burst into tears and run away. But to my immense surprise and delight, she launched herself and wrapped her tiny little arms around my legs before looking up into my face.

  “Daddy Elliot,” Lilah said before closing her eyes and burying her face into my knees.

  I felt a bolt of pure, innocent love for my daughter shoot through me as I leaned down and picked her up in my arms, holding her tightly.

  When I turned to Annie, her cheeks were streaked with happy tears.

  “Finally,” Annie mouthed at me.

  “Finally,” I mouthed back.

  The next few days were a whirlwind of emotion. As much as I wanted to devote as much time to making things work with Annie, the real world didn’t stop just because I was in love and had discovered my daughter. I was busier at work than ever. Empire was coming up on its twenty-fifth anniversary and we were set to be profiled in TIME magazine.

  Naturally, it was a big deal, and I was savvy enough to know that the right or wrong profile could make the company.

  Or break it, for good. Unfortunately, this meant that I would have to work harder than ever to keep any bad publicity from leaking out.

  Which also, unfortunately, meant that I wouldn’t be able to step down or go public with Annie until the profile was over. My head was spinning when I first learned about the project, and I had no idea how to handle things.

  Normally, I wasn’t the type to lose my shit or stress over work – as much as I worked, I tried hard to stay as calm as I possibly could. I was sitting at work that day, with my blood pumping hotly through my veins and my stress flooding my body. Before I could even think about what I was doing, I reached for the phone and called Annie’s cubicle line.

  She answered at once.

  “Wh
at is it?” Annie asked. She’d gotten over sounding overly anxious while talking to me at work, but I could still sense a hint of fear in her voice.

  I cleared my throat. “I need you to come to my office,” I said. “It’s about the TIME project.”

  “Oh, um, ... I don’t know,” Annie said.

  I sighed loudly. “Be here as soon as you can,” I said. “Please.”

  30

  Annie

  And just like that, I was fucking my boss, Elliot, in his office, of all places.

  “I need you,” I moaned as I closed my eyes and dug my fingers into Elliot’s shoulders, pulling him closer. A powerful climax was building from deep within me and I bit the inside of my mouth to keep from screaming with pleasure as it exploded and crested over my head. Pressing my lips to Elliot’s in an intense kiss, I felt him shudder and buck harder. I could feel that my own pleasure was setting him off, and Elliot let out a low growl into my neck, muffling himself.

  We stayed locked together like that for a few seconds before Elliot eased out of me. He grinned at me, then brushed the sweaty tangles of my blonde curls out of my face.

  “You look so beautiful right now,” Elliot said.

  I blushed. “I don’t think that’s possible,” I said, glancing down. My sweaty curves were heaving with each breath I took and my belly quivered when I let my feet down to the ground and hopped off the desk.

  “You are,” Elliot insisted. “Trust me. I’m always right, remember?”

  I giggled quietly. “That was insane,” I said. “I can’t believe we just did that!”

  Elliot was dressing quickly and I followed suit, retrieving my bra and blouse from his desk and putting them on with shaky fingers. I bent over with a grunt and reached for my tights and still-wet panties, which I pulled up against my skin. My skirt was bunched on the floor and just as I was yanking it up over my hips and doing the zipper, I heard a sound that made me freeze.