Painted Vessels

by Gina Renee Freitag

  “I don’t want you to worry about that, Sarah,” Eli said.

  “But Mr. Miller was nice to me. I don’t want him to be sad. What if it turns him into a mean person, like those kids that pushed me down?”

  “Sarah,” Ada said, “why don’t we go inside and let Papa and Pastor Duncan talk about this. It’s time for your bath anyway.” She took the girl’s hand in hers and led her into the house, flashing a glance at her husband over their daughter’s head.

  “Sarah’s right, you know,” Marcus pointed out. “John and his family are not the only ones who will be affected by this. If East Haven loses the Miller farm, we’re all going to feel it. A lot of men will be out of work when John leaves.”

  Eli sighed and peered at the pastor with resignation. “All right, Marcus. I’ll talk with him,” he said. “But I’m not sure he’ll accept my help.

  JOHN

  Isaac Webber had just left with the evening milk delivery. John sat in his barn as a heavy exhaustion ran through him. He leaned forward with forearms resting on his knees and stared at the straw dusted floor. He had sent most of his men home earlier, keeping a few on hand to check his other crops and keep them well irrigated. He almost expected those few men to return with news of another plague. He deserved it.

  John moved numbly through the motions of the day. He felt as though he had been cut open and spread out, exposing all the ugliness inside. He didn’t like what he saw, and he didn’t like that others could see it too. He had a hard time understanding why God loved him, as hideously as he had acted. Even so, the idea that God did still love him filled his heart with a thirsty ache for his heavenly Father—and for a peace he hoped he might feel someday. John rested his head in one of his hands, accepting the regret that would nag at his soul for a long time before any acceptance could begin to cover it. He prayed that joy would eventually replace that regret, but today he just felt weary.

  As he sat on the hard, wooden bench, he heard someone walk into the barn. Looking up, he expected to see one of his workers, but his eyes met Eli Gardner instead. John closed them and hung his head again.

  “You have every right to come in here and gloat, Eli. But I just don’t think I can handle it today. Please,” he begged. “Let me be.”

  “I didn’t come here to gloat,” Eli said. “I came to apologize.”

  “You want to apologize,” John said, looking up again. “What for?”

  Eli sat down on a milking stool across from him. “Because I’m a stubborn man who has a hard time trusting people,” he admitted. “I kept a part of myself hidden away, and because of that, I didn’t give you a chance to get to know me. If I had been more open, maybe you wouldn’t have been forced to make your own conclusions about me. Maybe you would have believed me when I tried to tell you the corn was a bad investment. You might not be in this mess if I had been more honest.”

  “No, I did this to myself,” John said. “I know when to take responsibility for my own foolishness. I wish I had listened to you—or at least to David. I had no reason to doubt him. I just had to do it my own way; I was so sure I was right.” He rubbed his brow and sighed deeply. “Listen, Eli. I was unfair to you from the beginning. I spent way too much time thinking poorly of you and judging you incorrectly. I said and did some horrible things. I’m sorry; I was wrong. I saw how hard you worked on that field. Maybe you were just doing it for Ray, but thank you.” He peered at Eli for a moment. “Why don’t you work like that every day? I know you have it in you. You could easily work your way up to Ray’s lead man and give the other workers a run for their money. Don’t you want to give your family more than you do now?”

  Eli studied John for a few seconds. “What do you think I do when I’m not at Ray’s?” he finally asked. “I don’t work to help myself; I work to help others. When I’m not at the Larson farm, I’m helping someone else who needs it more than Ray does. I don’t think you ever saw it because you never thought you needed help before. But now you do.” He leaned forward. “Marcus told me you’re thinking of moving to White Falls. John, you can’t do that. Your farm is too important to this town. If you leave, a lot of men will be out of work. They won’t be able to support their families. You have to stay.”

  John shook his head. “You don’t get it. I don’t even have enough to pay my men for the work they’ve already done this week. I have nothing to give Ray for his losses, nothing for my loan. I won’t be able to pay for next year’s crops—not even with what I might bring in with my wheat and squash. I doubt I can maintain my livestock through the winter, and I should probably give back all the hay I purchased from Ray in the spring. At least that could go toward what he will lose in his corn yield.” He let out a resigned sigh. “I don’t have a future in East Haven. I appreciate how highly you think of my farm, but I am a ruined man, Eli.”

  “You’re not ruined. Not if someone invests in your farm until it can stand on its own again.”

  “And who’s going to do that?” John asked with a scoff.

  “I will,” Eli said. “But with some conditions.”

  John looked at him, confused. “You?” He searched the young man’s face. Eli was serious; there was no mocking in his expression. “You…” John said slowly as realization dawned on him. “You can invest in my farm. That was you all this time! You helped the Webers…you did that! But what about the Martin baby? It doesn’t make sense. You weren’t on that list.”

  “You’re right about the ledger, John; I wasn’t on the list. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t help them.”

  “Wait…you paid for what the town couldn’t raise!” The puzzle pieces started falling into place.

  “I told you I kept a part of myself hidden,” Eli said.

  “Then, why did you say you couldn’t help with the Webers’ home? Why did you make us all think that?” John asked.

  “I never said I couldn’t contribute. You came to that conclusion on your own. I said that you couldn’t tell the other men how much they had to give. It wasn’t your place to decide what they could afford.” Eli paused for a moment as John tried to wrap his mind around the information he now had. “Come on, John. Let me invest in your farm. I have the money; I could buy it outright. But I don’t have the knowledge or the desire to run it. I want you to have it back someday. God has given you a talent for farming as much as He has given me a talent for investing.”

  “Investing…” John said with a self-critical chuckle. He thought back to when he had told the men about the corn investment. “…and what would you know about that?” he said, mocking his own words from that day. “So, these conditions of yours, what are they? I guess it’s only fair that you get to tell me what to do after I tried to do that to you.”

  Eli laughed before taking on a more serious, business-like attitude. “I’ll cover all your losses this year and your expenses for next year, but you’re going to have to become your own employee. Pay yourself what you pay your highest compensated worker; you’ll have to learn to live on that. At the end of the year, any profit your farm makes above the cost of running it will be used toward paying off what I’ve invested. You’ll do that for as many years as it takes to pay it back completely. After that, the farm is yours again. You can do whatever you want with your profits.”

  “So, I pay you back interest free?” John asked. “You won’t make any money from this, you know. I guess that’s more than fair. You’re being too easy on me.”

  “Oh, you won’t be paying me back,” Eli explained. “You’ll put those payments toward a charity, any one of your choosing.”

  “I suppose you’re going to oversee that,” John said.

  “No, you can work with David on that; I don’t need to hang over your shoulder. You’ll be accountable to God, not me. After I give you the money and we set things up with David, our business is done.”

  “Why are you doing this?” he asked.

  “Actually, you have Sarah to thank. She helped me realize something,”

  “Re
ally? What’s that?”

  “She helped me recognize that investing in you feels right. People will always be a good investment.” He reached out a hand to John. “If we have a deal, let’s meet with David first thing.”

  John grabbed on to his hand and gave it a grateful shake. “I guess I’ll see you at the bank in the morning,” he said. “Hey listen…” He dropped his head and ran his fingers through his hair. “I know I don’t deserve this, so…” He lifted his eyes and looked at Eli. “Thank you.”

  ELI

  Sarah and Lily sat on the ground by the caravan’s smokehouse, creating a miniature village out of sticks and rocks. They leaned twigs together to form houses and placed various sized rocks by them, insisting they were vardos. They traced roads and trails into the dirt. They picked flowers and weeds and placed them next to the tiny houses as a way of decorating their little yards. The mid-September sun kept the ground warm, and they created their town for hours. Eli enjoyed watching them play.

  When he had told Sarah last month that they would be visiting the winter camp and spending six nights in the vardo, she was excited to finally meet her extended family. She knew the caravan had adopted her mama and papa just as her parents had with her. She loved listening to Eli talk about their time with the caravan and begged for a new story almost every night. After six months and many repeated stories, she said she felt as though she had known them her entire life. In September, Eli would take her to Oak Springs, and all those familiar characters would move from story to reality. She gleefully looked forward to what she called an adventure of a lifetime!

  The following month, they enjoyed good weather during their two days of travel. Eli made a point of stopping for a meal in Clearwater. He told Sarah the story of how he met Dr. Keeler, which led to meeting her. Once they were back on the road, Ada made up thought-provoking games to entertain the girl during the most tiresome stretches of their journey.

  They arrived at the West Woods right before supper, and Sarah was delighted with the camp. She was greeted affectionately by everyone, and after Jed gave her a big bear hug, she traced his tattoos with her finger.

  “You’re just like my papa,” she said with a smile. When it was Rosa’s turn to hug the little girl, Eli watched them instantly fall in love with each other.

  Right after the adoption, Eli had written to Harold Ross and asked him to pass on a letter he enclosed for the caravan. They received it in March, and when they learned that the couple had adopted the girl, they looked forward to their next visit with great anticipation. Jed and Rosa doted on her and gave her the gifts they had been saving up since spring.

  Though Lily was almost a year older than Sarah was, they got along well. Within the first day, the girls were inseparable. They alternated whose vardo they slept in and went for daily walks with Myra along Badger Creek. At twelve years old, Myra was like a little mother, playfully ordering the girls around. Sarah and Lily loved the attention and followed her orders without question. Sam still lived in Tony’s vardo, and for the most part, he ignored the young girls. He had grown almost as tall as his father and had similar coloring, but his features were more like Goldie’s. Even so, Eli could see a bit of Ira around the boy’s eyes.

  “I can’t believe how fast the kids are growing up!” Eli commented to Jed as they sat by the fire. “I remember when Lily was born and now, she’s almost nine! And Sam is practically a man. It’s only been a year since I last saw them. What happened?”

  “You know,” Jed pointed out, “you married Ada at Sam’s age. He just turned sixteen a few weeks ago.”

  “What! That can’t be right,” Eli said. He looked at Ada. She was laughing as she visited with the other women. Where did all the time go? So many things had changed. “I’m sorry about Cobra,” he said, glancing back at Jed. “I loved that dog, too. That first night, if he hadn’t sat on my feet, we probably would have sneaked out of the camp. I don’t know what would have become of us.” Eli chuckled. “You must have felt like you were taking on quite a handful when we ran into your vardo! But you changed our lives, Jed.”

  He smiled at Eli’s words and lowered his eyes. “You seem like you’ve had a good year, son,” he said after a while. “You’re in a better place than you were last fall.”

  “Yeah,” Eli agreed. “Life is peaceful right now. I love being a father, and I’ve finally let go of a lot of things; I stopped fighting.” He looked at the man who had helped him through some of his most difficult struggles. “Jed, I want to ask you something.”

  “Sure, what’s going on?” he replied, looking up from the fire.

  “I want you and Rosa to come home with us. I want you to live in East Haven and be Sarah’s grandparents.” Jed was silent. “You don’t have to decide now,” Eli continued. “Talk with Rosa about it. You wouldn’t have to worry about anything. We have room in the house, and we could always build onto it if we need to. Please consider it.”

  “What about the others?” he asked.

  Eli would have invited them all to come if he thought they would agree. He understood why Jed mentioned them, he was asking him and Rosa to leave one part of their family for another. It wouldn’t be an easy decision either way.

  “Maybe they could change their summer market route and travel east instead of west,” Eli suggested as he threw a stick onto the fire. “East Haven could be one of the towns on their new itinerary. I don’t think God wants me to leave that place; I’m not done yet. Perhaps I’m just being selfish, but I miss having you around. I don’t want our time together to be only one week out of the year. Tell me you’ll at least think about it.”

  “I’ll think about it,” Jed promised as he leaned back in his chair and sighed.

  ADA

  Ada set the candle on the small table by the bed and slipped under the covers, curling up to Eli. They had returned home yesterday evening with just enough time left in the day to give Sarah a bath. She had played hard all week and was at least two shades dustier because of it. When it was time to leave the West Woods, she and Lily held onto each other as they cried over their impending separation. Sarah finally let go of her friend and made a tearful round of goodbye hugs with the rest of the caravan. By the time she reached Rosa and Jed, the little girl could hardly speak as tears etched dark lines onto her dusty cheeks. They hugged her tightly and assured her that it would seem like hardly any time had passed before she saw them again.

  Ada noticed an unspoken exchange in the glances between Jed and Eli. When Jed pulled him into an embrace, he whispered a few words into his ear. Eli nodded and clasped him on the arm before helping his family into the wagon.

  The morning after their return, the little family went to church. All the way into town, Sarah talked about the worship time they shared with the caravan. She wanted to know why her papa didn’t play his guitar at their home church and why they couldn’t sit around a fire during the services at East Haven. Ada pointed out that it would have to be a much bigger circle, and the building wasn’t large enough. She winked at Sarah and asked her to list all the things she liked about her Sundays with the town. The activity helped guide Sarah’s mind back to the style of worship they would experience that day.

  Ada loved visiting the winter camp; she missed everyone in the caravan throughout the year, but she also noticed how comfortable it was to come home to East Haven now. She loved both places; they each felt like home in a different way.

  “Agnes Miller and I had a very agreeable conversation today,” she said as the candlelight flickered shadows onto their ceiling.

  “I’m glad to hear it,” Eli said. “I don’t know how much John told her about what happened to his farm or my investment in it, but everyone can see the change in him. Maybe she’s happier now that he’s at peace. It’s already affecting his workers. You should hear how highly Isaac speaks of him these days. Of course, I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone as positive as Isaac. He was even optimistic after his house burned down. There isn’t an ounce of pride
in that man; he accepts help as graciously as he gives it. John and I could both learn a few things from him.”

  “I think you’re too hard on yourself, Eli,” she teased. Grinning, she poked him playfully in the side. He grabbed onto her hand and turned toward her.

  “I asked Jed if he and Rosa would consider coming to East Haven to live with us,” he said.

  Ada’s heart skipped at the idea. “What did he say?”

  “He said he would take a month to think about it and talk over the idea with Rosa. He’ll write to us when they have an answer. We probably won’t hear from him until after we get back from the Leg Run in October.”

  “Oh, speaking of that,” Ada said, “did you know Mrs. Russell’s son lives in Lambury? We could call on him while we’re there. It would be nice to finally meet him.”

  “No, I didn’t know. I’m not sure that will work out this time. You remember how busy we were in April. I already purchased the train tickets, and I didn’t allow for any extra days in the city.” He reached up and brushed a lock of hair out of her face.

  “Oh, well. Maybe next time,” she said as she sat up and leaned over the candle to blow it out. She rested her head on Eli’s shoulder. It did feel good to be home! She closed her eyes and prayed that she would have a chance to share her love of the town with Jed and Rosa.

  ELI

  Eli glanced up briefly when Ada walked into the sitting room, drying her hands on a towel. A few minutes earlier, Eli had come in through the front door and sat in one of the parlor chairs by the fire. He meant to let her know he was home, but the letter in his hand distracted him. On his way home from the post office, he sifted through a stack of mail; one of the letters was from Dr. Keeler. As he began to open it, he noticed the next one was from Jed and immediately abandoned the first. Eli had hoped to hear from him in October but having to wait until mid-November for Jed’s answer wasn’t hard to understand. It was a big decision and he wouldn’t make it lightly.