The Pirouette Predator

by Jade Wright

  The truth is, Michael and I split up way before I had let people believe. I left for my home town sooner than I told anyone, but not as Piper. As Robyn.

  Did I know this was happening?

  No.

  I swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help me God!

  I was completely unaware of what I was doing when I 'switched' to Robyn.

  There wasn't just one 'Robyn' either.

  Oh no.

  Somehow I created one version of Robyn who still loved Luke... whereas the other hated him for all he was worth.

  The girls I'd abducted were able to tell police officers and social media all about my seemingly 'split personality.'

  They told everyone how I went down there to the basement in hysterics one moment – then left for just a few minutes before coming back and being completely different.

  No longer sad and howling over my loss of Luke, but actually laughing about it.

  I can just imagine the stories swirling around the newspapers now. My face all over the front pages. Ridiculed.

  Funny thing is, people in this town always used to warn potential boyfriends about me back in the day.

  'Stay away from her,' they'd say.

  'Trouble,' they called me.

  I never really understood why.

  I guess that's why I always wanted to get away from this wretched small town.

  I needed to go somewhere new, where no one knew my name.

  I needed a fresh start. No judgement.

  When I left, I was able to bury my past. Forget about it.

  I was no longer the girl who had grown up getting hurled in and out of foster homes.

  I was free to be someone new.

  Someone amazing.

  I could breathe!

  Anyway – I'm getting ahead of myself now.

  Where was I?

  Oh yes!

  The adrenalin was incredible when I surprised my sister on her doorstep; and she looked so thrilled to see me.

  She had no idea what was coming, how much I hated her.

  We drank a bottle of wine out on her porch and caught up.

  That's when she'd told me about Luke. It piqued my interest right away!

  Luke added a new layer to the story – a layer I so desperately wanted and needed. It was a surprising little perk in my master plan.

  When she finally needed the bathroom I slipped Rohypnol into her glass, all the while anger was bubbling up inside of me.

  I despised her.

  I watched the pill dissolve into the Chardonnay, feeling my excitement starting to grow.

  I had to hide my smile when she came back outside and took a big sip from the glass.

  The potency of the drug was amazing!

  It's not something I'd ever used before, obviously, or even really researched. I had no idea how quickly it would take effect.

  I guess that was the moment it really hit me.

  This was happening.

  It wasn't just some bizarre idea in my head anymore.

  I was a bundle of nerves and excitement rolled into one.

  Funny thing is, now that I think of it, the Rohypnol paralysed my sister completely.

  At least she felt what I feel like now before I took her to that basement.

  She was the first girl to be taken down there. She was still completely motionless when I tied her up to the chair, but she watched me all the while, her eyes blinking in confusion.

  When the drug finally wore off she couldn't remember any of it.

  “Why?” she had asked me, her face full of confusion as she struggled with her bindings.

  “I want your life,” I'd shrugged coldly.

  “I don't understand, Pip. How can you do this to me? I'm your sister! I love you!” her voice was raising too much.

  I was new to this, nervous of someone hearing her scream.

  I slapped the duct tape over her mouth to quell her noise.

  “Love me!?” I had laughed hysterically at that, I remember.

  “Where were you when all that shit was going on when we were kids, Rob!? Tell me that. Nothing bad ever happened to you, did it!? You never helped me when I needed you the most. And you know what? Michael left me. You didn't know that, did you?!” I spat at her viciously.

  She'd shaken her head at me then, her tears dropping down onto her lap.

  “I can't do it all again, Rob. Don't you see how tiring it is to have to restart? But now, I don't have to. I can just take your life! It's genius, really. I honestly can't wait to meet Luke! He sounds delightful,” my eyes shimmered with excitement as my brain was still processing all of this information itself.

  I started writing in the journal as her.

  I even hid my car away for a while. It was when I finally parked it in the driveway and Cody noticed that everything started to really kick off.

  I continued her scandalous relationship with Luke.

  At first it was just supposed to be a bit of fun. I revelled in the idea of having a Toy Boy. But truthfully, I was desperate for love and I wanted Luke to see me, Piper, not Robyn anymore.

  I'd lost Michael, but I had a chance now to have a ready formed relationship with my sisters lover. He would be none the wiser, and it worked!

  I guess you can say I developed a bit of an attachment to him.

  I was far too scared to lose him, the way I'd lost Michael. So when I started finding out that he was cheating on me, I may have lost it just a little bit.

  Like I said before, men are all the same.

  I, me, Piper, was a bit greedy when it came to Cody – but 'Robyn' didn't know about Cody.

  'Robyn' saw Cody through Piper's eyes.

  Are you keeping up? Just in case you're not, let me try to explain this to you.

  Piper believed she got to town and that her sister was missing. Piper started up a steamy romance with Luke completely on her own AND she still strung Cody along too. Slut.

  'Robyn One' loved only Luke and 'Robyn Two' hated Luke.

  When I became Robyn, I was disgusted at Piper for doing anything with Cody.

  Of all people, really!?

  Standards, darling. But I couldn't control that.

  My dissociative disorder made me feel like I was watching Piper – like a fantasy.

  I'd always had such a brilliant imagination as a kid. I made up so many imaginary friends.

  So, when the doctors told me I'd developed this fantasy of truly believing I was watching Piper when I switched to 'Robyn,' it didn't really surprise me.

  Luke was the only one who came close to discovering the truth. All that stuff on his computers search history was all because he suspected me.

  He was trying to find out how many characteristics I shared with sociopaths.

  He was researching psychopaths, trying to find out how common it is for a woman to be one.

  I am neither a sociopath nor a psychopath.

  I am also not a narcissist.

  You see, those people can't love at all. I, however, do.

  People misunderstand me completely.

  People don't understand Dissociative Identity Disorder at all.

  As hard as I tried to warn Luke, he just kept on digging.

  He broke so much faster than I thought he would.

  Why couldn't he have seen that I just needed him to stop his silly investigations?

  He could still be alive today. Perhaps we could have even been together, but what's the point in thinking of what could have been now, right?

  I'm sure in time, my heart will heal, the way it always does.

  Time heals all wounds, they say. I say they just have to fester a little bit first; and fester, they did.

  All those things I did to Piper, well, to me really, I was doing to myself.

  I was planting cameras around the house and the speaker, too.

  I was hiding the keys. Writing threatening notes to myself. Even talking to myself.

  I was playing with myself,
without even realising it! Making myself paranoid.

  That's the fascinating thing about mental health disorders – they're actually pretty phenomenal, when you think about it.

  Suddenly, the impossible is possible.

  Crazy ideas become tangible and we don't even know it!

  I was doing the most marvellous, seemingly implausible stuff without realising it.

  The truth is, I am capable of so much more than you.

  I am power.

  OK, well, 'Robyn' is.

  I am merely their host.

  It was explained to me that a 'host' is rarely aware of the other personalities residing inside of them.

  That's how I could SEE Piper, but she couldn't see me.

  See that 'switch' I just did there?

  It's so easy now, to take over whenever I want to.

  I am in control.

  Sneaking into the police station and into the evidence room was easier than I could believe.

  This country has seriously slack security. If there's something I've learned, it's how easily people can be distracted.

  When the officer went hurtling over to my sisters cottage thinking I was in danger, I guess that's when I 'switched,' because when he got there, the place was empty.

  I've heard stories about what happened after I got stabbed. Rumours circulate all around me every single day.

  It isn't fair really.

  That, you see, is where I am not in control.

  You never can control what people will say about you behind your back though, can you?

  It's hard to let that go.

  It's hard to know that people will come to their own conclusions no matter what I say.

  Anyway, after I got stabbed, Bibiana managed to untie one of the other girls who still had all of her fingers and toes. She was sent charging out of the basement in search of help.

  She must have been running for quite some time before someone found her. There's nothing close-by within walking distance where I kept them. That's why what happened to that old couple is so unfortunate.

  They were just in the wrong place, at the wrong time.

  In the state she was in it couldn't have been an easy journey. But she'd persevered and well, the rest is history.

  I lost.

  Game over.

  K.O.

  I know you must still have questions. I'm trying to get through them all.

  I suppose one of the biggies is, what about River?! Everyone is always so concerned about the outcome of an animal in a story. Dogs are so much easier to love than humans, aren't they?

  Yes – yes, I did saw off my own dogs leg.

  Do I feel good about it?

  No! Of course I don't.

  But you see the thing is, I wasn't in control!

  There's certain things I still don't remember fully. Sawing off her leg being one of them.

  I think the hypnotist decided to spare me there. I can only imagine it being the most horrific thing to see or do.

  One thing does puzzle me, though. River still treated me with such love and adoration, every single day. Even after what I did to her. We don't give dogs nearly enough credit, do we?

  They can sense if a person is good or bad.

  They can smell fear radiating off of us like a wretched stench.

  Did she know it wasn't really me doing that to her?

  She must have, right?

  Otherwise surely she'd have turned on me!

  She knew it was 'someone else' hurting her!

  I AM innocent.

  Regardless of that fact, my reputation is now tarnished. Although that sounds like a bit of an understatement.

  I'll be in a mental facility for the rest of my life, I think.

  I'm not sure what's worse, this or prison.

  I was told my 'condition' is no excuse for criminal activity. Shocker.

  Either way, I'll be flip-flopping like a fish between the criminal justice system and the mental health system for the rest of my pathetic life.

  Of course I plead not guilty by reason of insanity. I had to.

  How could I possibly be culpable when I didn't know I was doing it, right?!

  The public was outraged.

  River is with Cody now.

  He wants to visit me with her but at this stage, it's not allowed.

  On the other hand, unsurprisingly, Robyn does not want to visit me. Who can blame her, after what I did to her.

  I miss her, when I'm Piper. She doesn't understand that I think; doesn't understand that sometimes I still want to destroy her. That's the thing about Dissociative Identity Disorder, there's no magic pill to take it away.

  Nothing can get rid of who I can become.

  I can talk to the doctors as much as I want and do their stupid exercises, but I'll never escape the people living inside of me. When they take over, I cannot help.

  I am a prisoner in my own body.

  So perhaps it's a good thing that I'm paralysed now.

  It certainly makes everyone around me feel safer.

  The 'Robyn's' inside of me didn't plan for things to go this way. Everything just spiralled out of control.

  I guess it's like that with everything in life though.

  No matter how hard you try to control a situation, life has other plans and nothing you do can stop them.

  I hear Cody tried to start a petition for me. Free Piper! So sweet. Forever loyal, that one.

  Why do I always go for the bad boys?

  Cody would have been so much better for me, upon reflection.

  Anyway, I don't think he got many signatures on his petition, if any.

  Not many people think my current situation is quite as controversial as Cody does.

  The world hates me and now I guess that is my cross to bear.

  I touch the scar on my neck. It's thick and lumpy.

  A constant reminder.

  For the rest of time, I will be remembered as The Piroutte Predator.

  They're saying I must have definitely had an accomplice, that I couldn't possibly have done it all on my own.

  Perhaps that is true.

  Perhaps it is not.

  Try as they might, the cops will never get the truth out of me.

  Epilogue

  Robyn

  It's been seven months since Piper was caught.

  It has been the most bizarre seven months of my life that, before this, was really quite dull.

  It took me a while, but I'm back at the school teaching again.

  I have a gift, you see.

  Retelling stories through song and dance is my passion.

  I couldn't ignore it for too long.

  It did break my heart when I realised I'd never be able to dance again. Not after losing my toes. I had no chance.

  I still keep my beaten up pointe shoes strung up in the cottage. Sometimes I sit and stare at them for hours, reminiscing on a different life.

  I run my hand across my old ballet bar, remembering the feeling of dancing. The feeling of waiting in the wings of the stage, watching the curtain slowly lift to reveal my audience.

  All eyes on me as I glide to centre-stage.

  It was like a drug to me.

  My balance has gone now.

  I have hardly any strength left.

  You'd hardly notice though, not when I put on my custom shoes. Not quite as alluring as ballet slippers, are they?

  I have 'toe fillers' now. I swear if you told me a year ago that this is where my life would be today, I'd have laughed at you.

  The shoes are a help, but it will never be the same.

  My relationship with Piper will never be the same again either. The way she looked at me while she was slicing off my toes down in that basement will haunt me for the rest of my life.

  It was like she didn't even know who I was.

  To her, I was just like all the other girls in the room.

  I wasn't her twin sister.

  I was nobody.

  Maybe to her, I al
ways was.

  I've come to accept my fate, I suppose.

  Those that can't do, teach, as they say.

  I'm working on a new ballet production at the moment.

  Giselle never went ahead. No one felt quite right picking that show back up.

  The ghostly maiden costumes I'd worked tirelessly on for months have been stored away, collecting dust in the dressing room.

  I have a new class of fresh dancers now. New talent.

  We're creating our own version of Coppélia.

  We decided to go for a comic ballet production this time.

  No one really wanted to do something too serious after everything that transpired over the last few months.

  It's a story about a man who notices this incredibly beautiful woman sitting by her window reading a book.

  Try as he might, he can't seem to get her attention. He falls hopelessly in love with her even though he's engaged to be married to another woman.

  Little does he know that she is actually a life-sized doll, created by a mad scientist who had put her out to dry. The scientist is trying to find a way to bring the doll to life and make her his life companion.

  Regardless, the man is besotted with this woman with her face buried in a book.

  His fiancée notices how infatuated he is with her, learns that she's actually a doll and starts to impersonate her to win over her true love.

  As silly as the story sounds, the choreography is still incredible. I'm having fun with it. Getting to know my new students... every one of them has their own story and I'm loving learning the new dynamics of this group.

  Everyone has a secret; and I am slowly figuring them all out.

  Day by day, I'm slowly starting to feel a little bit like me again.

  I've started a support group with all of the girls who I was kept down in the basement with.

  We're all dealing with major post traumatic stress as I'm sure you can imagine.

  It's good that we have each other.

  We're all cut from the same cloth now. Dancers who can't dance. Mutilated. Broken.

  Having them to fall back on is like a safety net for me, and they all trust me. Despite my appearance, looking just like Piper, they think I'm different because I went through exactly what they went to.