Wicked Witches of the Midwest Mystery Box Set

by Amanda M. Lee

  “You’re not my parent,” I reminded him. “You can’t yell at me. I did what I felt I needed to do and I’m not sorry about it.”

  Chief Terry cleared his throat to get my attention. “I may not be your parent, but I’m close. I hate to agree with Landon, but ... that’s two moronic things you’ve done in less than a week. Perhaps some ramifications need to be introduced here so you’ll finally learn.”

  I worked my jaw. “Fine. Arrest me. Knock yourself out.”

  His glare never wavered. “Don’t tempt me.”

  “And don’t push me,” Landon added. “I’m angry, Bay. Like ... really angry. I don’t understand why you did this.”

  “I was hoping to find proof that Lorna is a dark witch. At least then we would have a direction to look.”

  “And did you find that proof?” Chief Terry asked. “Was it worth risking your entire future? I mean ... that’s what you did, young lady. Had Lorna caught you, what do you think would’ve happened?”

  I’d given careful consideration to that question and come up with ... well ... nothing good. “We weren’t caught.”

  “You were almost caught.”

  “By Dani. We could’ve bamboozled her.”

  “Oh, well, you could’ve bamboozled her. How great is that?” Chief Terry folded his arms across his chest and stared at the sky. His anger was palpable. “I just don’t understand you sometimes. You’re supposed to be smarter than this.

  “I expect Tillie to pull these kinds of shenanigans,” he continued. “Even Thistle to some extent. You, however, are my good girl. You were always a good girl. You make me want to ... .” He broke off and mimed throttling an invisible person. He put a lot of effort into it, to the point his mime would’ve been funny under different circumstances.

  I was debating how to respond when Aunt Tillie swooped in. She clearly hadn’t gotten the hang of using the scooter’s brakes because she careened into the table without slowing, offering up a loud “oomph” as she fought to keep from landing in Thistle’s ice cream.

  “What the ... ?” Chief Terry grabbed her arm to keep her from falling. “Speaking of people who think before they act. We were just talking about you. Were your ears burning?”

  “I was burning rubber,” Aunt Tillie responded, her face flushed with what could only be described as excitement. “Margaret was trying to catch me, but I left her in the dust. I think she’s still back there sputtering.”

  Chief Terry looked like a man who had been saddled with babysitting several of the most obnoxious children in the history of mankind. “Do I even want to know what you did to Margaret?”

  “Probably not.” Aunt Tillie’s smile was bright. “What have you guys been up to?”

  “Oh, well, I’m glad you asked.” Chief Terry launched into the tale before I had the chance to put my unique spin on it. By the time he was finished, Aunt Tillie was cackling and rubbing her hands together.

  “That’s awesome,” she enthused. “What kinds of birds were they?”

  “What does that matter?” Thistle asked blankly.

  “The sort of birds being controlled have a direct link to the witch controlling them, mouth,” Aunt Tillie fired back. “I’m trying to help you morons. By the way, here’s a free tip on that front: Don’t admit to ‘The Man’ when you break the law. These two might be pushovers, but there will come a point when they arrest you. Trust me. I know.”

  I frowned. It was true that she’d been arrested — and more than once — even by Chief Terry.

  “You had that arrest coming,” Chief Terry warned. “I’m not sorry about it.”

  “You really did have it coming,” Thistle said. “I, however, was just trying to protect my cousin. At your behest, I might add. I’m totally innocent here. See ... I’m eating ice cream. Only the innocent can eat ice cream.”

  Landon leaned around me and flicked her ear. “Just shut up for once. This is serious.”

  I needed this conversation to move away from laws that were broken and focus on the problem at hand. The birds were becoming a real issue. “Ravens and crows,” I replied to Aunt Tillie’s earlier question. “They were mostly ravens and crows, although there were a few others thrown in for good measure. They came toward the tail end of the … attack.”

  “Like what?”

  “Um ... .” I was hardly an ornithologist.

  “There were a few sparrows and what looked to be a duck,” Thistle volunteered. “We didn’t spend much time hanging around to identify them.”

  “A duck?” Aunt Tillie made a face. “That makes sense. They’re pretty much jerks ninety percent of the time. The only time they’re not is when they’re freshly hatched.”

  “This is a fascinating conversation,” Landon drawled. “What does the type of birds have to do with anything?”

  “I just told you.” Aunt Tillie’s tone was withering. “The types of birds called to a certain energy identifies the energy.”

  “And what do these birds tell us?”

  “That we’re dealing with a dark witch.” She delivered the line as solid fact. “I wasn’t certain before — I thought Bay was just being Bay — but now I’m convinced that we’re dealing with a dark witch. My bad.”

  My bad? I wanted to strangle her. “I told you we were dealing with a dark witch from the start.”

  “And you turned out to be right. Fancy that.” Aunt Tillie reached for Thistle’s spoon, but Thistle smacked her hand away. “I’ll remember this moment,” Aunt Tillie threatened. “You’re dead to me.”

  “I’m crushed,” Thistle said. “Go back to the birds. We need information and apparently you have some ... even though you were pretending otherwise until three minutes ago.”

  “I wasn’t pretending otherwise,” Aunt Tillie countered. “I just didn’t realize how serious the situation was. I thought Bay was being Bay.”

  “Stop saying that,” I growled. “That’s not a thing.”

  “Oh, it’s totally a thing,” Thistle countered. “I mean ... you’re not as bad as Clove, but you’re a total whiner.”

  “Says the woman who thinks she got rabies from the birds.”

  “Hey!” She extended a warning finger in my direction. “Birds are horrible creatures. They’re dirty ... and nasty ... and they make weird sounds. Sometimes they look at me funny. I hate that.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Whatever. Can we get back to the important part of the discussion? What do we do about the birds? And how do we figure out who the dark witch is?”

  “It’s Lorna,” Aunt Tillie replied simply. “She’s the only one who makes sense. You said yourself she came from a dark witch and has been using her powers under the radar ever since.”

  I pinched the bridge of my nose to ward off an incoming headache. “You said that Leslie wasn’t a dark witch, that she just made potions.”

  “I didn’t say that.”

  I was incredulous. “You did.”

  “I did not.”

  “You did so.”

  “I did not. I would remember saying that.”

  “That did it.” I moved to stand, thoughts of wrestling her to the ground and making her eat dirt flitting through my head. I didn’t get a chance, because Landon grabbed my shoulder and forced me to sit.

  “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he supplied. “There are witnesses here and I will have no choice but to arrest you if you commit murder out in the open.”

  I pouted. I couldn’t stop myself. “Well ... that’s no fun.”

  He didn’t smile like he normally would, which told me I was still in trouble. Ah, well, I would have to wear him down with kisses later. If that didn’t work, there was always bacon. I’d purchased a nightgown from a novelty store online two weeks before — it made me look like a strip of bacon … with some rather impressive cleavage — and tucked it away for the next time I was in trouble. It looked like I would be using it sooner rather than later.

  “The birds are relics,” Aunt Tillie volunteered. “They’
re kind of like spirit animals. The person doing this is calling to the darkest creatures in the vicinity. That just so happens to be birds in this case.”

  “Relics?” I furrowed my brow. I vaguely remembered reading about them when Aunt Tillie was trying to enforce regular magic classes when we were kids. “That means they’re more powerful than regular birds.”

  “Pretty much,” Aunt Tillie confirmed. “Our witch is imbuing them with power. Until she’s destroyed — or locked up and removed from temptation — those birds will continue to grow in number and power.”

  That was not what I wanted to hear. “Well ... crap.” I moved to scratch at one of the marks on my arm, but Landon stopped me.

  “We need to clean these,” he said after examining the wounds. “I don’t think you have rabies or anything, but I don’t want to risk an infection.”

  “We’ve got stuff at the store,” Clove offered. “I’ll clean them both up when we finish our ice cream.”

  Even though he was clearly still angry, Landon took a moment to order my hair. “I would hate for your arm to fall off or anything.”

  “Yeah. That would suck.” I rubbed my forehead. “What do you think we should do about Lorna? I mean ... she’s the obvious choice as our dark witch.”

  “She is,” Landon agreed. “We don’t have proof of anything, though. In fact, as far as the investigation is concerned, we’re standing in the middle of a clue-barren desert. We have nothing. Lorna was seen outside the blacksmith shop at the time the medical examiner set for Adam’s death. If she killed him, it was in a unique way.”

  “Huh.” Well, that put us in a pickle. “So ... what do we do?”

  “You don’t do anything,” Landon shot back. “You’re done for the day. You’re going to Hypnotic to clean those cuts and scratches, and letting the professionals do their jobs.”

  That sounded unlikely, but there was no way I would argue with him in front of an audience, especially when his temper was so close to the surface. “I already planned to go to Hypnotic,” I promised. “You don’t have to worry about me. I’ve had my fill of birds for the day.”

  “We all have.” Thistle ran her hand over her forearm. “Besides, we have to get ready for the ritual gathering tonight. We’re supposed to do a blessing ... although I think our mothers have backed off on that now given Clove’s pregnancy. That did turn out to be a convenient excuse.”

  I frowned. “That can’t be right. The ritual isn’t happening already, is it?”

  “It’s not the big ritual,” Clove replied. “Hazel is hosting tonight. It’s supposed to be a pre-blessing, to make sure the bluff is ready for the solstice celebration and wedding tomorrow. She arranged it with our mothers.”

  “Which means that we should all avoid it,” Aunt Tillie suggested. “If Hazel arranged it, it’ll be boring.”

  I was maudlin. “It’ll be boring,” I agreed. “But we can’t ignore it. If we do, our mothers will melt down.”

  “So what?” Aunt Tillie was full of bravado. “Let them melt down. We should present a united front and let them know we mean business. If we do, they won’t be able to boss us around ... like ever.”

  “And why would we present a united front with you after the way you turned on us over Clove’s pregnancy?” I challenged. “You were a fink. You told us never to ally ourselves with finks.”

  “It’s true,” Thistle said sagely. “You did teach us that.”

  Aunt Tillie’s expression was dark. “I am not a fink. You take that back.”

  “If the fink hat fits ... .”

  Landon made an exasperated sound, interrupting us before we could launch into a petty argument. “You’re all going to the ritual and you know it. As for Lorna ... leave her to us. I don’t want you guys finding trouble. We’ll handle this case going forward.”

  He was stern enough that all I could do was swallow hard. I hated being left out of things, but it was obvious he was in no mood for an argument. I could hardly blame him.

  “We’ll focus on the ritual tonight,” I promised.

  “And you’ll stay out of the investigation,” Landon prodded.

  “For tonight,” I agreed. “As for tomorrow ... well, that’s a new day.”

  “Ugh.” He dropped his head and stared at the table. “This is what I get for falling in love with a mouthy woman who has her own ideas. I just ... why can’t you ever do things my way?”

  “I do. I just can’t this time. We’re in this. But for tonight we’ll leave it alone. Besides, I need to research relics before I decide on my next move. That’ll take time.”

  He grabbed my half-eaten ice cream and started shoveling it in his mouth. “You make me tired, Bay.”

  “I know, but I’m worth it.”

  “You still drive me crazy.”

  “Just think how boring your life would be if I didn’t.”

  Twenty

  I conducted research all afternoon. The information on relics was interesting ... and yet limited.

  “They’re definitely harbingers,” I noted as I stretched my arms over my head. I sat on the couch in Hypnotic and I hadn’t moved for hours. “But they’re more than that. Supposedly the individual calling to them can invade the animals with a sliver of human soul. That’s what makes them malevolent.”

  “Really?” Clove made a face. “I don’t like the sound of that.”

  “How does it work?” Thistle asked. “Doesn’t the witch in question have to fracture her soul to carry out something like that?”

  “Pretty much.” That had been the part bothering me, too. “That’s why only dark witches can do it.”

  “Well, that’s awesome.” Thistle’s distaste was evident. “And here we thought the worst thing we would have to worry about was a killer with sexual motivations.”

  I frowned. “How do you figure that?”

  “Well, our suspects are a wife who was thrown over for another woman, the other woman who couldn’t get the man she was in love with to divorce his wife, and the wife’s boyfriend, who wants to keep his sexual involvement with a married woman on the down low. Those are all sexual motivations.”

  Huh. I hadn’t really thought of it that way. She was right, though. “Well ... I need to think about that. Birds aren’t known for being sexual. They externally fertilize eggs.”

  “True, but certain birds — like peacocks, for example — preen and present themselves to garner favor from the opposite sex.”

  “That’s a male thing.”

  “And warlocks exist. We haven’t crossed paths with many of them, but they’re real.”

  “I guess. I ... .” Wind chimes over the door sounded to alert us to the presence of customers.

  “Oh, no,” Clove fretted as she stood. “I should’ve locked the door sooner. If we don’t leave in the next five minutes we’ll be late.”

  “You’re already technically late,” Mom drawled from the doorway, catching me by surprise. She was dressed in a purple robe rich in color and a little frayed around the hem. It looked old, which was probably because it was practically ancient … at least by our standards. I hadn’t seen her dust it off in more than a decade. Behind her, Twila and Marnie wore identical robes. “Why are you guys still loafing around? The ritual starts in twenty minutes.”

  I was beyond confused. “Why are you guys in town?” It’s not like they never came to town. They attended festivals and enjoyed the occasional gossip fest at the coffee shop. They stocked up at the store at least once a week. At this time of day, though, they were normally knee deep in dinner preparations. It was odd for them to change their schedule.

  “We’re here for the ritual,” Mom replied, her eyes flashing. “Have you suddenly gone deaf?”

  “But ... .” I shifted my eyes to Thistle. “I thought you said the ritual was on the bluff tonight.”

  “That’s what I was told,” she replied with a shrug.

  “The ritual was scheduled for the bluff,” Mom agreed. “After Hazel visited, however, she agre
ed that the magic out there was already primed and it was unnecessary to mess with the energy. She decided to move the ritual to the town square because she believes Hemlock Cove is inundated with negative energy right now.”

  Oh, well, that was interesting. The fact that Hazel had picked up on that made me realize that she was an untapped resource. As much as I disliked her, as nervous as she made me feel, she was a fountain of witchy information. “That sounds good.” I stood with determination. “I just need to tell Landon I won’t be going with him. I don’t want him looking for me.”

  “Landon is already out there,” Mom countered. “Hazel is showing him around and explaining things.”

  I was definitely out of the loop on this one. “Oh, well ... .” I caught Thistle’s cloudy gaze. She was obviously as confused as me. “Then I guess we should head out for the ritual.”

  “We don’t have to wear those ugly robes, do we?” Clove asked, wrinkling her nose. “I just mean ... the color isn’t flattering and they’re kind of shapeless.”

  Mom rolled her eyes. “The robes are for those already inducted into the coven. Things broke apart before you guys reached the age of maturity. You don’t get the robes unless you officially join the coven.”

  “Which we have no intention of doing,” Thistle mused. “Great. We’re excited for the ritual ... and the fact that the food trucks will be close if we get bored. This really is the best of both worlds.”

  “We’re expected to fast through the night,” Twila argued. “That makes the solstice celebration pure.”

  “It also makes us hungry,” Clove complained. “I can’t fast for the next twenty-four hours. That’s cruel and unusual punishment. I’m nourishing a human being here.” She gestured toward her stomach. “I can’t go without dinner.”

  “And we’re standing in solidarity with Clove,” Thistle added. “We can’t go without dinner either.”

  As ridiculous as I found the argument, there was no way I was joining the fasting witches. “Yeah. I think we’re going to watch and enjoy the ritual, and then eat a healthy dinner with our significant others.”