Confessions of a Thug

by Meadows Taylor

  CHAPTER I.

  You ask me, Sahib, for an account of my life: my relation of it will beunderstood by you, as you are acquainted with the peculiar habits of mycountrymen; and if, as you say, you intend it for the information ofyour own, I have no hesitation in relating the whole; for though I haveaccepted the service of Europeans, in my case one of bondage, I cannothelp looking back with pride and exultation on the many daring feats Ihave performed. Often indeed does my spirit rise at the recollectionof them, and often do I again wish myself the leader of a band ofgallant spirits, such as once obeyed me, to roam with them wherever myinclination or the hope of booty prompted.

  But the time is past. Life, Sahib, is dear to every one; to preservemine, which was forfeited to your laws, I have bound myself to yourservice, by the fearful tenure of denouncing all my old confederates,and you well know how that service is performed by me. Of all themembers of my band, and of those with whom chance has even casuallyconnected me, but few now remain at large; many have been sacrificed atthe shrine of justice, and of those who now wander, broken, and pursuedfrom haunt to haunt, you have such intelligence as will lead to theirspeedy apprehension.

  Yet Thuggee, capable of exciting the mind so strongly, will not, cannotbe annihilated! Look at the hundreds, I might say thousands, whohave suffered for its profession; does the number of your prisonersdecrease? No! on the contrary, they increase, and from every Thugwho accepts the alternative of perpetual imprisonment to dying on agallows, you learn of others whom even I knew not of, and of Thuggeebeing carried on in parts of the country where it is least suspected,and has never been discovered till lately.

  It is indeed too true, Ameer Ali, said I; your old vocation seems tobe as flourishing as ever, but it cannot last. Men will get tiredof exposing themselves to the chance of being hunted down like wildbeasts, and hanged when they are caught; or what is perhaps worse tomany, of being sent over the Kala-Panee (transported); and so heartilydoes the Government pursue Thugs wherever they are known to exist, thatthere will no longer be a spot of ground in India where your professioncan be practised.

  You err, Sahib; you know not the high and stirring excitement of aThug's occupation. To my perception it appears, that so long as oneexists, he will gather others around him; and from the relation ofwhat I will tell you of my own life, you will estimate how true ismy assertion. How many of you English are passionately devoted tosporting! Your days and months are passed in its excitement. A tiger,a panther, a buffalo, or a hog, rouses your utmost energies for itsdestruction--you even risk your lives in its pursuit. How much highergame is a Thug's! His is man: against his fellow-creatures in everydegree, from infancy to old age, he has sworn relentless, unerringdestruction!

  Ah! you are a horrible set of miscreants, said I; I have indeed theexperience, from the records of murders which are daily being unfoldedto me, of knowing this at least of you. But you must begin your story;I am prepared to listen to details worse than I can imagine humanbeings to have ever perpetrated.

  It will even be as you think, said Ameer Ali, and I will concealnothing; of course you wish me to begin my tale from as early a periodas I can recollect.

  Certainly; I am writing your life for the information of those inEngland, who would no doubt like to have every particular of sorenowned a person as yourself.

  Well, then, Sahib, to begin; the earliest remembrance I have ofanything, and until a few years ago it was very indistinct, is of avillage in the territories of Holkar, where I was born. Who my parentswere I know not; I suppose them to have been respectable, from thecircumstances of my always wearing gold and silver ornaments, andhaving servants about me. I have an indistinct recollection of a tallfair lady whom I used to call mother, and of an old woman who alwaysattended me, and who I suppose was my nurse; also of a sister whowas younger than myself, but of whom I was passionately fond. I canremember no other particulars, until the event occurred which made mewhat I am, and which is vividly impressed on my mind.

  From an unusual bustle in the house, and the packing up of articlesof clothing and other necessaries, I supposed we were on the eve ofdeparture from our home. I was right in my conjecture, for we left itthe next morning. My mother and myself travelled in a dooly, old Chumpawas mounted on my pony, and my father rode his large horse. Several ofthe sons of our neighbours accompanied us; they were all armed, and Isuppose were our escort. On the third or fourth day after we left ourvillage, after our march of the day, we as usual put up in an emptyshop in the bazaar of the town we rested at. My father left us to goabout on his own business, and my mother, who could not show herselfoutside, after repeated injunctions that I was not to stray away, laydown in an inner room and went to sleep. Finding myself at liberty,as Chumpa was busy cooking and the Juwans were all out of the way, Ispeedily forgot all my mother's orders, and betook myself to play withsome other children in the street. We were all at high romps, when agood-looking man of middle age addressed me, and asked me who I was--Imust have been remarkable from the rest of the ragged urchins about me,as I was well dressed, and had some silver and gold ornaments on myperson. I told him that my father's name was Yoosuf Khan, and that heand my mother and myself were going to Indoor.

  "Ah, then," said he, "you are the party I met yesterday on the road:your mother rides on a bullock, does she not?"

  "No, indeed!" retorted I, angrily, "she rides in a palankeen, and Igo with her, and father rides a large horse, and we have Chumpa andseveral Juwans with us. Do you think a Pathan like my father would letmy mother ride on a bullock, like the wife of a ploughman?"

  "Well, my fine little fellow, it shall be as you say, and you shallride a large horse too, one of these days, and wear a sword and shieldlike me. But would you not like some sweetmeat? See how tempting thosejulabees look at the Hulwaee's; come with me, and we will buy some."

  The temptation was too strong to be withstood by a child, and after afearful look towards the shop where we stayed, I accompanied the manto the Hulwaee's. He bought me a load of sweetmeats, and told me togo home and eat them; I tied them up in a handkerchief I wore roundmy waist, and proceeded homewards. This transaction had attracted thenotice of some of the ragged urchins I had been playing with, and whohad longingly eyed the julabees I had been treated to; and as soonas the man who had given them to me had gone a short distance, theyattacked me with stones and dirt, till one more bold than the restseized me, and endeavoured to get my prize from me. I struggled andfought as well as I could; but the others having fairly surroundedme, I was mobbed, and obliged to deliver up my treasure. Not contentwith this, one big boy made a snatch at the necklace I wore, on whichI began to bellow with all my might. The noise I made attracted thenotice of my acquaintance, who, running up, soon put the troop of boysto flight, and taking me under his charge, led me to our abode, wherehe delivered me up to Chumpa; at the same time telling her of thescuffle, and cautioning her not to let me out of her sight again.

  I was crying bitterly, and my mother hearing a strange voice, called meto her. Asking me what had happened, I told my story, and said that theperson who had saved me was speaking to Chumpa. She addressed him frombehind the cloth, which had been put up as a screen, and thanked him;and added, that my father was absent, but that if he would call againin an hour or two, he would find him at home, and she was sure he wouldalso be glad to thank the person who had protected his child. The mansaid he would come in the evening, and went away. My father returnedsoon afterwards, and I received an admonition in the shape of a soundbeating, for which I was consoled by my mother by a quantity of thesweetmeats from the Hulwaee's, which had been the cause of my trouble,and I may add also of my present condition. You see, Sahib, how fateworks its ends out of trifling circumstances.

  Towards evening my acquaintance, accompanied by another man, came. Iwas a good deal the subject of their conversation; but it passed on toother matters, among which I remember the word Thug to have been firstused. I understood too from their discourse that there were many on theroad between where
we were and Indoor, and that they were cautioning myfather against them. The men said that they were soldiers, who had beensent out on some business from Indoor; and as there were a good many oftheir men with them, they offered to make part of our escort. My friendwas very kind to me, allowed me to play with his weapons, and promisedme a ride before him on his horse the next day. I was delighted at theprospect, and with him for his kind and winning manner; but I did notlike the appearance of the other, who was an ill-looking fellow--Ishall have to tell you much more of him hereafter.

  We started the next morning: our two acquaintances and their men joinedus at a mango-grove outside the village, where they had been encamped,and we proceeded on our journey. In this manner we travelled for twodays, and my friend performed his promise of taking me up before him onhis horse; he would even dismount, and lead him, allowing me to remainon the saddle; and as the animal was a quiet one, I used to enjoy myride till the sun became hot, when I was put into the dooly with mymother. On the third day I remember my friend saying to my father, asthey rode side by side.

  "Yoosuf Khan, why should you take those poor lads of yours on to Indoorwith you? why not send them back from the stage we are now approaching?I and my men are ample protection to you; and as you will belong to thesame service as myself, there can be no harm in your trusting yourselfand family to my protection for the rest of the journey; besides, thedangerous part of the road, the jungle in which we have been for thelast two days, is passed, and the country before us is open. The onlyfear of Thugs and thieves existed in them, and they are now far behind."

  "It is well said," replied my father; "I dare say the lads will bethankful to me for sparing them a part of the long march back, and theyhave already accompanied us some fifty or sixty coss."

  On our arrival at the stage, my father told the lads they must return,at which they were highly pleased; and on their departure about noon,I gave many kind messages to my old companions and playfellows. Iremember too giving an old battered rupee to be delivered to my littlesister, and saying she was to hang it with the other charms and coinsabout her neck, to remind her of me. I found it again, Sahib; but, ah!under what circumstances!

  At this period of his narrative, Ameer Ali seemed to shudder; a strongspasm shot through his frame, and it was some time before he spoke: atlast he resumed:

  Tell a servant to bring me some water, Sahib--I am thirsty with havingspoken too much.

  No, said I, you are not thirsty, but you shall have the water.

  It was brought, but he scarcely tasted it--the shudder again passedthrough him. He got up and walked across the room, his irons clankingas he moved. It was horrible to see the workings of his face. At lasthe said, Sahib, this is weakness. I could not conceal it; I littlethought I should have been thus moved at so early a period of my story;but recollections crowded on me so fast that I felt confused, and verysick. It is over now--I will proceed.

  Do so, said I.

  The Juwans had been gone some hours, and it was now evening. Myfriend came to our abode, and told my father that the next were twoshort stages, and if he liked they might be made in one, as it wouldshorten the distance to Indoor; but that we should be obliged to startvery early, long before daylight, and that the bearers who carriedthe dooly could easily be persuaded to make the march by promise ofa sheep, which the potail of the village he proposed going to wouldsupply free of cost, as he was a friend of his. My father seemed to berather indignant at the idea of his taking a sheep for nothing, andsaid that he had plenty of money, not only to pay for a sheep, but togive them a present if they carried us quickly.

  "Well," said my friend, "so much the better, for we sipahees haverarely much about us but our arms."

  "True," returned my father; "but you know that I have sold all myproperty at my village, and have brought the money to aid me in ourservice. Indeed, it is a good round sum." And my father chuckled at theidea.

  "What! have you a thousand rupees?" I asked, my ideas of wealth goingno further.

  "And what if it should be more?" said he, and the matter dropped; buteven now I think I can remember that my friend exchanged significantglances with his companion.

  It was then arranged that we should start with the rising of the moon,about the middle of the night. We were roused from our sleep at thehour proposed; and after the men had had a pipe all round, we set off.I was in the dooly with my mother. The moon had risen; but, as well asI can remember, there was but little light, and a slight rain falling,which obliged us to travel very slowly. After we had proceeded a fewcoss, the bearers of the dooly put it down, saying that they could notget on in the dark and the mud, and proposed to wait till daylight.My father had a violent altercation with them; and as I was now wideawake, and it had ceased to rain, I begged to be taken out of thedooly, and allowed to ride with my friend. He did not assent as readilyas usual; yet he took me up when the bearers had been scolded intogoing on. I remarked to him that some of the soldiers, as I thoughtthem, were absent. My remark attracted my father's notice to thecircumstance, and he asked our companion where they were. He repliedcarelessly, that they were gone on in advance, as we had travelled asyet so slowly, and that we should soon overtake them.

  We proceeded. We came at last to the deep bed of a river, on the sidesof which there was some thick jungle, when my friend dismounted, as hesaid, to drink water, and told me the horse would carry me over safely.I guided him on as well as I could; but before I had got well acrossthe stream, I heard a cry, and the noise as if of a sudden scuffle. Italarmed me; and in looking back to see from whence it proceeded, I lostmy balance on the horse, and fell heavily on the stones in the bed ofthe river, which cut my forehead severely. I bear the mark now.

  I lay for a short time, and raising myself up, saw all the men, who Ithought were far on before us, engaged in plundering the dooly. I nowbegan to scream with all my might. One of them ran up to me, and Isaw it was the ill-looking one I have before mentioned. "Ah! we haveforgotten you, you little devil," cried he; and throwing a handkerchiefround my neck, he nearly choked me. Another man came up hastily,--itwas my friend. "He must not be touched," he cried angrily to the other,and seized his hands; they had a violent quarrel, and drew theirswords. I can remember no more; for I was so much frightened that Ilost all consciousness, and, as I suppose, fainted.

  I was recovered by some water being forced into my mouth; and the firstobjects which met my eyes were the bodies of my father and mother, withthose of Chumpa and the palankeen-bearers all lying confusedly on theground. I cannot remember what my feelings were, but they must havebeen horrible. I only recollect throwing myself on my dead mother,whose face appeared dreadfully distorted, and again relapsing intoinsensibility. Even after the lapse of thirty-five years, the hideousappearance of my mother's face, and particularly of her eyes, comesto my recollection; but I need not describe it, Sahib; she had beenstrangled! She, my father, and the whole party had come to a miserableand untimely end! I heard a narrative of the particulars of the event,many years afterwards, from an old Thug; and I will relate them intheir proper place.

  When I recovered my consciousness, I found myself once more before myfriend who had saved my life. He supported and almost carried me inhis arms, and I perceived that we were no longer on the road. We wererapidly traversing the jungle, which extended as far as I could see inevery direction; but the pain of my neck was so great, that I couldscarcely hold up my head. My eyes seemed to be distended and bursting,and were also very painful. With my consciousness, the remembranceof the whole scene came to my recollection, and again I fell intoinsensibility. I recovered and relapsed in this manner several timesduring this journey; but it was only momentary, only sufficient toallow me to observe that we still held on at a rapid pace, as the menon foot were between running and walking. At last we stopped, and itwas now broad daylight; indeed, the sun had risen. I was taken off thehorse by one of the men, and laid under a tree on a cloth spread on theground, and after some time my friend came to me. Desolate as I was, I
could not help feeling that he must have had some concern in the deathof my parents; and in my childish anger I bitterly reproached him, andbade him kill me. He tried to console me: but the more he endeavoured,the more I persisted that he should put me to death. I was in dreadfulpain; my neck and eyes ached insufferably. I heaped all the abuse Icould think of upon him, and the noise I made attracted the notice ofthe ill-looking man, whose name was Gunesha.

  "What is that brat saying? Are you too turned woman," cried hefiercely, addressing the other, whose name was Ismail, "that you do notput the cloth about his neck and quiet him at once? Let me do it, ifyou are afraid."

  And he approached me. I was reckless, and poured forth a torrent ofvile abuse, and spat at him. He untied his waistband, and was about toput an end to me, when Ismail again interfered, and saved me: they hadagain a violent quarrel, but he succeeded in carrying me off to somelittle distance to another tree, where some of the band were preparingto cook their victuals; and setting me down among them, bidding themtake care of me, he went away. The men tried to make me speak, butI was sullen and would not; the pain of my neck and eyes seemed toincrease, and I began to cry bitterly. I lay in this manner for somehours, I suppose; and at last, completely tired out, fell asleep. Iwoke towards evening; and when Ismail saw me sit up, he came to me,soothed and caressed me, saying that I should henceforth be his child;and that it was not he, but others, who had murdered my parents. Iremember begging him to do something for my neck, which was swelled andstill very painful. He examined it, and seemed to be struck with thenarrow escape I had had of my life.

  He rubbed my neck with oil, and afterwards put upon it a warm plasterof leaves, which relieved it greatly, and I felt easier for itsapplication. He remained with me; and some of the other men, sittingdown by us, began to sing and play to amuse me. I was given some milkand rice to eat in the evening; but before it was time to sleep, Ismailbrought me some sherbet of sugar and water, which he said would make mesleep. I suppose there was opium in it, for I remember nothing till thenext morning, when I found myself in his arms on horseback, and knewthat we were again travelling.

  I pass over the journey, as I remember nothing of it, except thatGunesha was no longer with us, which I was very glad of, for I hatedhim, and could not bear his presence. Even in after-years, Sahib,though we have been engaged together in Thuggee, I always bore adeep-rooted aversion to him, which never changed to the last. Ismailand seven men were all that remained of the band; and we proceeded, bylong and fatiguing marches, to a village in which he said he resided,and where I was to be given up to the care of his wife. We arrived atlast, and I was introduced to a good-looking young woman as a child ofa relation, whom he had long ago adopted as a son, and had now broughthome to her: in fine, I was formally adopted by them as their own, andmy sufferings were speedily forgotten.