Immersive

by Becky Moynihan

  Bren was staring at his chest. Silently observing the scalpel’s retreat and the fresh wound’s disappearance. I must have made a noise. Must have broken through the haze he seemed to be stuck in, because his eyes lifted. And found mine.

  I gasped. His eyes. They pulsed with an otherworldly light. His pupils were pinpricks, barely there. He swept his gaze over my body, taking in the harness and tubes. He froze on the bags of my blood.

  Suddenly, his eyes were fire. He swung them toward Renold.

  Something else happened then. Something I never thought I’d ever see. Renold stumbled back, and there was fear, fear stamped on his face.

  Tendons and veins protruded from Bren’s neck and arms as he jerked against his restraints. The chains rattled menacingly.

  Renold wheeled, grabbing a syringe from the metal cart. He quickly jabbed the needle into Bren’s bulging bicep. And that wasn’t the only part of him swelling with new muscle. His whole body was. His thighs had thickened, his chest and abs more defined.

  And was I staring at an eight pack? Yes. Yes, I was.

  Once Bren was under again, the visible tension in Renold’s shoulders eased. He even chuckled a bit before saying, “Well, Mr. Bearon may be a spy, but he’s proven himself worthy today. He’s been chosen to be a part of the new human race.”

  My brain short-circuited. “New human what?”

  He turned to me with a victorious smile. “The new Elite race. It’s why the old world had to die. Nothing this monumental could have happened in a world focused on monetary gain. But after tireless decades dedicated to improving humanity and erasing defects, we are ready for a new era led by a master race.”

  I couldn’t hide my disgust. “We’re not gods, Renold.” I remembered Bren telling me that his first day in Tatum City.

  His gaze held fake sympathy, like he pitied my stupidity. “I can’t expect you to understand. You haven’t received a higher education and don’t know the power of science. That will all change soon. The Elite race will be gifted with knowledge. They will receive everything the world has to offer.”

  “Sounds like you’re creating monsters.”

  Anger sparked in his eyes. “Is it monstrous to want perfection? I told you from the beginning that it’s about control. Control your impulses. Your wayward reactions. Why do you think I never punished you with my bare hands all these years?”

  I jerked my head back as if struck.

  He prowled toward me, looking every inch a predator in that moment. “I know my triggers and limits. My Sensor instincts demand submission, and when you wouldn’t, it drove me mad. But I controlled those urges, same as any true Elite will.”

  He stopped just inside my cubicle. “Losing control is weakness and the path to becoming a Berserker. It’s why you consider yourself a monster. But I didn’t create that weakness, Lune. You did.”

  Hours later when all was silent with Bren still unconscious and Iris returned to her bed, I continued to replay Renold’s words.

  He was right. Fear of losing control had become my weakness, and ultimately, that fear had controlled me.

  But not anymore.

  I was going to embrace the chaos within me. Only then could I break free of the fear.

  Weeping filled my ears. Ragged sobs of anguish. The cries grew louder, drowning out the animal roars and screams of dying people.

  I jerked awake, eyes fluttering open to the sound of my own whimpers. The dream’s vivid imagery still clouded my mind. I released a shuddering breath, blinking to clear away the tears. I checked on Iris first, relieved to see her still asleep on the bed. But when I checked on Bren, it was to find his golden eyes already on me.

  My heart tripped and somersaulted.

  We continued to stare in silence. There was something different about his gaze. Something preternaturally still. It was more than a predator’s keen focus.

  It was wild. Wholly wild.

  I swallowed. When his eyes tracked the bob of my throat, I sucked in a breath. “Bren?”

  He didn’t respond. Didn’t react. Simply stared. It was too heavy. Too intense. Too much, too much. I looked away. Nervous confusion fluttered in my belly. Did the serum alter his brain?

  Maybe he was a Berserker. No, he couldn’t be. Renold wouldn’t have called him one of the chosen if he was.

  Right?

  Panicked breaths reached my ears. Mine. The more I tried to slow them, the faster they became.

  He can’t be. He can’t be. He can’t—

  “It’s . . . okay. I’m . . . okay.”

  My eyes widened at the sound of those familiar words uttered from a stranger’s voice. It wasn’t the deep, rolling timbre I knew so well. The voice was gruff. Like grinding stone.

  “Bren,” I gasped, frantically searching his face for answers.

  His jaw hardened and he grimaced, turning away.

  What the—?

  “Bren, please. Tell me what’s happening. I don’t know how you’re feeling and—”

  “I’m fine.” The words thundered from him and I flinched, startled by the unexpected volume. At my reaction, his head whipped my way. I swallowed a gasp at his crestfallen look. “Please don’t be afraid of me, little bird.”

  My lips started to tremble. “Oh, Bren, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry for what he did to you.”

  I saw the shame and vulnerability in his eyes before he hid his gaze from me again. It broke my heart. He was still him, I could see that now. But the voice that had comforted me for so long, that couldn’t even be wiped from my memories, was gone.

  “Everything is so . . . loud,” he said, sounding more bear than man. I forced myself not to cry. Not to mourn the loss of something precious. The time for that would come—and it would hit me hard—but in his moment of weakness, he needed me to be strong. “My skin . . . feels stretched too thin. And there’s this buzz, right beneath the surface. It’s wild and powerful.”

  He finally looked at me, his expression raw horror. “I’m afraid of what I’ll do if I’m set free.”

  My chin was wobbling now, no matter how tightly I pressed my lips together. He was scared of who he was. I understood that fear all too well. “You’re still you, Brendan Bearon,” I said past the tears clogging my throat. “The man whose gentle strength thawed my cold heart. The man who reminded me that I’m not alone. The man who would sacrifice everything for the people he loves. That is who you were, who you still are—strong, brave, selfless. And I’ll never give up on that man.”

  He studied me with those wild eyes, skittish and uncertain. But my gaze didn’t waver. Not this time. Not when I needed to prove how much I meant every single one of those words.

  I hadn’t realized how tense he was until his shoulders drooped, the hard lines of his body relaxing. He sighed, clearly exhausted.

  “What do you see in your future?” I asked him quietly, hoping to put his mind at ease as well. “When all of this is over, what’s the one thing that you want to happen?”

  His brow furrowed, then he shook his head. “I’ve never . . . I’ve never thought that far. I never let myself.”

  “Try,” I whispered, encouraging him.

  He frowned some more, deep in thought. Eventually, he cleared his throat, the sound like a tumbling boulder. His mouth tipped into the barest of smiles as he said, “I see a wedding. Our friends and family are there. It’s outside, the trees a vibrant mix of golds, oranges, and reds. You’re wearing a pretty white dress, and your hair is up so I can see the graceful curve of your neck that I love so much.”

  My laugh ended in a hiccuping sob.

  He smiled softly and I forgot all about the gruffness of his voice. “When you walk down the aisle, you’re holding flowers. I’m not sure what color they are, but they’re not blue. When your eyes lift to mine, I . . . I stop breathing. Inwardly, I’m saying, ‘How? How can this perfectly exquisite creature want me? She’s so pure and good, and I don’t deserve her.’ But I marry her anyway, thanking the heavens for this preciou
s gift. I sweep her into my arms and carry her all the way to our new home. There’s pine trees and a little house that I helped build, nestled beside a sparkling lake.”

  I was openly crying now, silent tears dripping off my chin. Bren’s voice was hushed, choked with emotion as he finished sharing with me the vision of his future—the vision I desperately wanted to become real.

  “The lake is almost too cold, but that doesn’t stop me. I carry you in, pretty white dress and all. And there, I make love to you. I don’t even notice the water surrounding us. All of my past fears and failures have been washed away. In that moment, I only know peace and joy and happiness. Because my salvation, my everything, is in my arms.”

  Silence settled between us. A comfortable one filled with yearning hope. After a while, Bren sighed, a faint smile still playing about his lips. “What about you, little bird? What’s the one thing that you want in your future?”

  I didn’t even have to think about it. “To be the lucky girl in your arms.”

  The faint click of a door unlocking woke me from a rare dream of hopes and wishes. When my eyes opened, the darkness was absolute. My heart skipped several beats, panic setting in. I startled at the rustling of chains.

  “It’s just me.” It took me way too long to identify the voice as Bren’s. I ignored the swift pang of sadness, focusing on his words. “There’s been a power outage. It could mean nothing, or everything.”

  “Can you see anything?” A faint scraping noise sent my heart to skipping again.

  “Yeah. No one’s in here but you, me, and Iris. But there’s movement coming from beyond the main doors. With the power down, doors like those would have to be forced open. Wait. Someone’s doing just that. Forcing their way in. It’s . . .”

  A fierce growl suddenly ripped through the darkness. Every hair on my body stood on end. The growl became words as Bren snarled, “What are you doing here?”

  Cackling laughter echoed around us, bouncing off the walls and burrowing beneath my skin. I didn’t need sight to know who had just entered. Bren growled again, the sound more animal than man. Nervous energy zipped through me when his restraints furiously clanged together.

  “Don’t touch her, you piece of filth. Don’t you dare—”

  Fingers touched my cheek. As I yanked away from the hand, Bren let out an unearthly roar that practically shook the floor.

  “Shut your trap, outsider,” drawled the voice in front of me. “I’ll deal with you soon enough.”

  With a sharp click, light blasted my eyes, blinding me all over again. It took precious seconds to blink the spots away. When they cleared, Lars’s gloating face came into view.

  “Hello, Mute,” he purred, placing a lantern on the floor beside him. “Miss me?”

  I ignored the asinine question. “Why are you here, Lars?”

  “Just doing a little research. Everyone’s all frantic with the electricity out, giving me an opportunity to finally get some answers. I know the Supreme Elite has let you in on his secret plans. Tell me what they are and I’ll leave the meathead alone. Well, after I rough him up a bit. Payback for giving me this scar.” He jabbed a finger at the ugly X on his cheek.

  I barked a laugh despite the frantic pounding of my heart. “Release me and I’ll tell you. Don’t worry, my collar is still working,” I crooned, prodding his ego.

  He hesitated, but I knew he’d give in. Knew he couldn’t pass up the chance to prove himself. Sure enough, he reached for my harness. “Try anything and you’ll pay,” he hissed, purposefully dragging his knuckles over my breasts.

  I bit back a snarl, but Bren didn’t. He loosed a flurry of curses and threats. Lars ignored him, but I didn’t miss the tremble in his fingers as they unbuckled my wrist cuffs. When the last restraint fell away, I swayed on legs that felt like rubber. Tubes still protruded from my body and I pulled the needles out, wincing at the sting. Lars had backed up a step, and I used the opportunity to stumble toward the door.

  He gripped my arm, stopping me from leaving the cubicle, but I was close. So close. I slumped against the glass beside the door, catching my breath. My show of weakness was only partly an act.

  “Now tell me,” he ordered. “Tell me what your father is planning. He hinted at more Trials. I want to know how I can further my status.”

  “You can’t.”

  He scowled, crowding my personal space as he snapped, “Why not?”

  I leaned to the side, far enough to grasp the glass door frame for leverage. “Simple. You can’t contend in any more Trials because you’re not worthy.”

  He froze, his dark gaze boiling with shocked rage.

  This was the time to strike. To try a maneuver I’d never attempted before. It was dirty and brutal. But it was the only way.

  I reached between his legs and gave his jewels a sharp twist. He fell to his knees with a grunt, and I shoved him backward into the lantern. Light flashed and spun crazily as I lunged for the metal cart. But I was weaker than I thought. My shoulder glanced off the door when I exited the cubicle, causing me to lose my balance.

  I fell sideways into the cart. Metal objects crashed to the floor and so did I. Something sharp sliced through my palm and I hissed. The floor grew slick with my blood, but I didn’t slow.

  “You’re going to pay for that!” Lars shouted. He stormed after me.

  My searching grew frantic. Where is it, where is it!

  And then I saw it—my freedom—scant inches away, winking at me knowingly.

  Before I could reach out, a boot stomped on my spine, pinning me to the floor. Air gushed from my lungs, but I managed to palm the tool and slip it between my teeth.

  Lars grabbed my other arm and wrenched it behind me. I groaned, my shoulder shrieking in agony, but I kept my lips firmly sealed. Hot breath hit my ear as he hissed, “You’re not going to be so high and mighty after this.” His laugh was demented. “You’ll do whatever I say when I’ve humbled you a bit.”

  He bent my arm even higher before allowing his other hand to rove my body. Revulsion shivered through me. He yanked my tank top up, and that’s when my thoughts switched off. I was running on instinct and barely restrained adrenaline. If I concentrated on what he was doing, panic would consume me. My reactions were under control. All I had to do now was free myself.

  The process was slow and painful. Twisting my collar around to find the keyhole without him noticing took patience, and time was running out. Despite my best efforts to ignore him, Lars wasn’t playing. He may not know what claiming meant, but Sensor instinct was controlling his movements.

  And then there was Bren. He hadn’t stopped roaring and yanking on his chains. I feared what the sight of Lars touching me was doing to him. Feared that he’d go Berserker in his need to protect me.

  So I renewed my efforts, blindly feeling for the small notch. When I found it, I carefully slid the tool from my mouth and fit it to the hole. My fingers trembled uncontrollably. With Lars so close, any metallic noise could alert him to what I was—

  Click.

  Everything went silent.

  Lars suddenly flipped me onto my back. I cried out as he dug a knee into my sternum. He reached for the collar, swearing colorfully when it fell open in his grasp.

  “Gotcha.” My lips formed a wicked smirk.

  Before I could say anything else, his hands were around my neck. “Treacherous snake,” he spat. “You think you can best me? Let me show you how powerless you really are.”

  And then he squeezed.

  Adrenaline, sweet adrenaline kicked in.

  Instead of fighting him, I dove into my mind. Energy whipped around and inside me, growing in volume despite my restricted air flow. The stronger the current became, though, the more my brain screamed for oxygen.

  Hold on, hold on.

  Just a few more seconds . . .

  And I could make this all . . .

  “Stop.”

  Lars released me immediately, but darkness crowded my vision, nearly breaking my c
oncentration. “Get off me,” I demanded, quickly dragging in air when his weight lifted.

  I tried to sit up, but the world tilted dangerously. I lay back down as my control over him began to slip. If he broke free of my mind control, I wouldn’t be strong enough to fight him off a second time.

  There was only one thing I could do, regardless of the consequences.

  “Release Bren.”

  His movements were robotic as he stood to do my bidding. Bren grew still, deathly so, watching Lars like a hawk. I should feel guilty—and I almost did—for making Lars unchain the thing, the man that could kill him. He looked so small and helpless next to Bren’s hulking form. But I didn’t pull back from his mind, didn’t order him to stop as he deftly unbuckled the harness, then the ankle cuffs bolted to the floor.

  Dizziness suddenly crashed into me like a tidal wave.

  I lost track of time and space, floundering to reach the surface.

  When I came to again, it was to find Lars’s soulless eyes inches from mine. I’d lost control.

  Without a word, he reared back and punched my face. I quickly curled onto my side, protecting my head. “You’re done, Mute. Done!” he shrieked. Pain pulsed through me as he kicked my back.

  Now I was the helpless one, too drained of blood and strength to defend myself. I tried burrowing into my mind again, but dizziness prevented me from absorbing more energy. I almost blacked out as Lars’s boot connected with the back of my head. It was the musical notes of jangling metal that chased the darkness away. I peeked through my arms in time to see Bren grab the chains above his head and pull. With the rest of his body now unrestrained, he might have the leverage to—

  One of the heavy metal chains snapped like a twig. He didn’t bother unbuckling the cuffs. Simply snapped the other chain too.

  Lars chose that moment to grip my hair. He yanked my head back and encircled my throat again. I clawed at his hold, but my hands were slick with blood from the cut on my palm.

  I frantically looked to Bren.

  I needed him. I needed him to save me.

  But he had stopped. A glass wall separated us. Lars had shut his cubicle door, locking him inside. The fingers at my throat squeezed and squeezed. I kicked and bucked, but for once, Lars was protecting his weak spots.