Out of Time

by Beth Flynn

  **********

  “You really think this will get mom off my back?” Cindy asked her father. It was several months before she’d even met Grunt—or as she knew him, Michael—and they were having a quiet cup of coffee in his study.

  Mr. Jenkins smiled at his only daughter. “Don’t you?”

  “I don’t know, Dad,” she replied honestly.

  “Look, I’ll plant an idea in your mother’s head. I’ll suggest that maybe building you the beach house might be a good way to convince you to settle down. I have no doubt that when I send her to the firm where he works that she’ll bite. She’s been trying to tie you to a man forever. He’s years younger than any of the men he works for, and he’s a nice looking guy. I know your mother will notice him.”

  “And I don’t have to do anything but become friends with him? Work with him on the stupid beach house?” she asked her father.

  “Just become his friend,” her father answered.

  “Gosh, Dad. I don’t know what your motive is and you don’t have to tell me. But, if you’ll help me keep mom off my back and keep my Miami condo a secret from her, I’ll give it a shot.”

  “Your mom doesn’t have to know about the condo or Carla,” her father answered.

  “What’s in it for you, Dad? Without giving me any details, because I know you won’t, what’s so important about this architect?”

  “I’m just trying to show some new friends that I can be trusted. That I can do my part. That’s all.”

  “Sounds like you’re trying to pledge a fraternity.”

  “In a way, I am.”

  Cindy never did figure out why her father wanted her to get close to Michael Freeman, but she didn’t mind playing the part for years. She ended up caring very much about him, and it broke her heart to see him pining over Kit. She even remembered helping him along by trying to make Kit jealous. She didn’t know if the little things she did helped or hurt his cause.

  The only thing she did know was that Kit’s husband, Grizz, was the scariest, meanest-looking motherfucker she’d ever met, and she never felt comfortable in his presence. He never did or said anything inappropriate, but he was obviously someone not to be messed with. At times, she actually feared for Michael.

  She didn’t want to let herself think what could happen to him if Grizz knew he was in love with Kit.

  **********

  The deception worked for a while. Tommy now remembered back to how he was almost caught by Grizz. He had graduated and was working full time at Monaco, Lay & Associates. Grizz called him one day.

  “Come to the motel. Now.” Grizz said into the phone. He hung up without waiting for Grunt to reply.

  What the fuck? Grunt fumed. He had two meetings that afternoon and didn’t have time to drive all the way out to the motel. But he sat back in his chair and thought about it. Grizz never called him. What if something was wrong with Kit? What if something happened?

  Calm down. You just saw her a couple of days ago. He had taken her to dinner and then a movie. Grizz never cared. He believed Grunt had a serious girlfriend. Kit was Grunt’s friend, and if Grizz wasn’t able to take her out that much, Grunt didn’t mind doing it. Of course, he always made it sound like he and Cindy would be the ones taking her out. He told Kit early on, “Cindy really does have a lot of studying and she doesn’t mind if I go out with friends, Kit. But I just don’t think you should tell Grizz that we go out alone. I know we’re not doing anything wrong and you know it, but you know how he is.”

  “I know, Grunt. I just hate to lie. I don’t lie, especially not to Grizz.”

  “Does he ever ask for details?”

  She looked thoughtful. “No, I guess he doesn’t. He never asks how you and Cindy are doing. He usually just asks if I had a good time. And stuff like, ‘Did Grunt make sure you were safely in your car before he left?’ You know how he is about my safety.”

  Grunt smiled at her. “Then you don’t have to lie and we can still have some friend time together.” He was relieved.

  What if Grizz somehow found out Cindy didn’t make it to all of their little excursions? That he was alone with Kit more often than not?

  Grunt pressed a button on his phone. “Eileen, I have some personal business to take care of,” he said. “Please reschedule my meetings.”

  Forty-five minutes later, he was sitting on the couch in number four. Kit wasn’t there, and he didn’t ask about her, telling himself she was out shopping or something. Everything seemed to be fine. No one was hurt. Grizz was in his recliner. Axel sat on the couch next to Grunt.

  Grizz stared at Grunt for a minute before finally asking, “So, how are things with you and Cindy?”

  The question caught Grunt off guard. Grizz never asked about him and Cindy. Not once. There was only one explanation. Grunt’s earlier assumptions had to be correct. Grizz knew that Cindy wasn’t going on the little “friend dates” with him and Kit. How did he find out? Kit must’ve accidentally let it slip. He was going to have to think of how to cover himself. He was mad at himself for not thinking about this before today. He should have had a ready answer. Maybe he was overreacting. Maybe he was thinking too much. He would play along and see where Grizz was going with this.

  “Cindy’s fine. We’re fine,” Grunt answered in a steady voice.

  Grizz didn’t say anything. He just looked at Axel, then back at Grunt. “Something you want to tell me?”

  This is it. He does know. Damn. He would still play along.

  “About what?” Grunt asked with as much sincerity as possible.

  “It’s okay to tell me,” Grizz said in an even voice.

  Really? Grunt thought. This was strange. Grizz never beat around the bush with anybody about anything. What was this really about?

  “Tell you what?” Grunt asked, looking at Grizz and then Axel. “What is it that you think I need to tell you?”

  “You wanna tell me why you live with a dyke?”

  Grunt tried not to let his jaw drop. He never expected Grizz would know Cindy was a lesbian. How did he know? Grunt looked over at Axel. Bingo. In addition to running Grizz’s car theft operation, Axel had a connection that did extensive background checks on people.

  Grunt sighed. “Why did you check on Cindy? Why did you have to look into her background?”

  “One of her father’s companies came up in a meeting,” Grizz said. “When I saw his name, I made the connection. I remembered Cindy Jenkins had a wealthy father. Wanted to see if it was the same guy. It was. I had to be sure she wasn’t with you for any other reason. Like she wasn’t with you because of business. My business.”

  “And?”

  “They’re clean. I’m pretty sure her father doesn’t know exactly what his accountant is having him invest in.”

  This wasn’t completely true, but Grizz wouldn’t tell Grunt that. Grizz had his suspicions, but he couldn’t be certain. Besides, if Cindy was there for the reason he thought, she wouldn’t be getting anything from Grunt. He’d kept Grunt out of his other business for exactly this reason.

  “But that’s not the point. Why are you setting up house with a dyke? And I know she’s not living at the condo.” Grizz nodded at Axel then, adding, “I know about the parade of fags that show up there and stay overnight in that penthouse.”

  Grunt looked away from him then. He stared at something on the wall. It worked for a little while, his plan to have a girlfriend so Grizz wouldn’t think he was a threat. So Grizz would let him spend time with Kit. What was he going to say? I’m in love with your wife and this was the only way I could think of to spend time with her?

  But it turned out he didn’t have to say anything at all.

  “It’s okay to tell me if you’re a fag, kid.”

  **********

  It was actually quite brilliant, or so he’d thought at the time. Letting Grizz think he was gay. Grunt hemmed and hawed after Grizz’s last comment. He was shocked, but also relieved he had an out. So what if he had to let Grizz think he was
gay?

  Then he panicked. Kit.

  “Don’t tell her!” he blurted. He looked at Grizz, then Axel. “Please! Please don’t tell Kit. I’m not sure how she would react.” He looked at the floor. “I wouldn’t want her to think less of me. You know I care about her. She’s like a sister to me.”

  Grizz didn’t say anything at first. He didn’t think Kit would care one whit about it. She’d seemed to accept Axel without judgment, though of course he couldn’t be certain. Kit was religious, and even though he didn’t know a damn thing about Kit’s religion, or any religion for that matter, he thought maybe homosexuality was taboo. It certainly was in the biker world. That’s why he covered for Axel and now he’d have to cover for his son.

  Would she see Grunt differently? Would she act differently around him thus causing someone else to wonder about Grunt’s sexuality? Grizz had a good thing going with Grunt. He couldn’t take Kit out as much as she would have liked, and Grunt picked up that slack for him. Besides, he wasn’t really a dinner and movie kind of guy, anyway. Okay, so his kid was gay. Big deal. Truth be told, he really didn’t have an opinion on it one way or the other.

  “She doesn’t need to know.” Grizz finally replied. Then, without another word, he got up and headed for the front door. He left, closing it behind him.

  Grunt had been dismissed. He looked over at Axel, who had kept quiet the whole time.

  “You’re not a homo,” Axel said to him matter of factly.

  Grunt didn’t know what to say. He remembered when he’d first discovered Axel’s secret. He was maybe twelve or thirteen then. They had been sitting around the pit when, one by one, everyone got up and left. Grunt and Axel were the only two remaining when Grunt said to him, “You shouldn’t watch them, you know. You make it obvious the way your eyes follow them.”

  Axel looked over at the boy. “What the fuck you talking about, kid?”

  Grunt looked at him and with a kind expression said, “Don’t worry, Axel. I won’t tell. But you need to be careful. I know you try and put on a show. You take Moe in the room every once in a while to keep up appearances. I guess it’s because she kind of looks like a guy with her short hair and combat boots?”

  Axel didn’t know what to say. His homosexuality could get him killed. How did the kid know? He was a smart little shit.

  “You have to be careful,” Grunt reiterated. “You don’t realize it, but you look at some of the guys when you don’t think anyone is noticing. I watch people a lot, and I notice it. Eventually, someone else will, too.”

  Grunt got up and left the biker sitting in the pit by himself. Axel stayed, absorbing what Grunt had said. If Axel valued his existence, he would have to watch it. Maybe it was a good thing the kid noticed. It might have actually saved his life. He’d been friends with Grizz since they were young and you would think that would offer him some form of protection, but there were no guarantees. Especially in the biker world.

  Now, Grunt shot Axel a worried look. “How do you know I’m not a homo? And what did you tell Grizz to make him think I was?” Before Axel could answer him, he added, “Other than the fact that Cindy is a lesbian?”

  “I just told him that I never saw you with a woman. Told him about the architect from Orlando. He’s a regular who likes to stay overnight. Grizz thinks he’s your boyfriend.”

  Allen? It all made sense now. Yes, Allen Ribisi was thirty-five, handsome, rich, and gay. He was a good friend of Cindy’s and would stay at her penthouse when he had business in Fort Lauderdale, which was a couple of times a month. Sometimes as much as one or two days a week. He and Allen had become good friends and would often go to dinner. Allen knew Michael Freeman wasn’t gay, and he never pried. He actually ended up being a good mentor. Grunt even went to Orlando twice to visit him. Of course Grizz would’ve thought he was gay.

  Grunt was human, though. He’d had a few flings over the years. Cindy had straight girlfriends, too, and more than a few had come to stay at the penthouse and offered themselves to what they thought was their straight friend’s boyfriend. Some girlfriends they were.

  Axel interrupted his thoughts. “Why are you letting him think you’re gay?”

  Grunt looked at Axel and sighed. Could he tell the biker the truth?

  Axel cut into his thoughts. “Before you tell me anything, you need to know up front that I will never turn on Grizz or betray him. I like you, kid. I didn’t want to tell him what I found, but if he ever found out that I didn’t tell him, well, I don’t need to tell you what I think would happen.”

  Grunt decided to go for it. When he gave it some more thought, the fact was that he could still make things difficult for Axel if certain members of the group knew he was gay. Maybe they could keep each other’s secrets. “Kit,” he blurted. “I just want to spend time with Kit.”

  “Seems like a major deception just to spend time with a woman.”

  “If you were talking about a normal woman, you’d be right. But, this is Grizz’s woman we’re talking about.”

  “What you do with your personal life is your business. If it involved the gang, I’d have a problem. But your secret is safe with me.”

  Axel was completely loyal to Grizz when it came to gang business. But as someone who’d experienced firsthand what it was like to deny your true self, he felt for the kid. Besides, he honestly believed that Grunt’s crush, or whatever it was, would eventually play itself out. Grunt would pine after her like a lovesick puppy for a while longer and eventually move on to a woman who was actually available. He’d keep the kid’s secret and maybe even have a little fun with it.

  Axel stood then and stretched. “You want to make it convincing, you might need to learn a little more about being gay.”

  “I’m not going to have sex with a man, Axel. No way. You know I’m not gay.”

  “I’m not telling you to have sex with a man. But, you still need to play it safe. Grizz still might have someone besides me check on you. I’m telling you, you’d better play the part.”

  “Fine. What do you suggest?”

  “I’ll be parked at the beach across from your condo tonight at eleven. You can follow me from there.”

  “Where are we going?” Tommy asked.

  “Time to introduce you to the underground gay haunts in Fort Lauderdale.”

  Chapter Fifty-Three

  2000

  Ginny just stared at him. “You are telling me you let Grizz think you were gay so you could be with me? That your girlfriend, Cindy, really was gay that whole time?” She threw her hands up in the air. “Tommy, this is crazy. I don’t believe you.”

  “It’s true, Ginny.” He looked hurt. “I didn’t do it on purpose, but I let it happen and used it to my advantage.”

  “No. No way. Grizz was too smart. He would’ve—”

  “He would’ve what? Figured it out? He did. He caught me.”

  “Caught you? How did he catch you?”

  “Somebody must’ve seen me out with a woman and said something to Grizz about me cheating on my rich girlfriend. Either that or he had me watched. He actually never told me how he found out. It didn’t matter, anyway. He knew I lied and he knew why.”

  “What woman?” Ginny felt a stab of jealousy. A feeling she recognized from when Tommy used to occasionally bring Cindy on their “friend dates.” Cindy was a big Rod Stewart fan, and Ginny remembered her always playing the song “Tonight’s The Night” on the cassette player in Tommy’s car. Cindy would even sing it to herself. Now that Ginny thought about it, she had been a tiny bit jealous, and as much as she loved Rod Stewart, she’d hated that song. Now she realized why. And to think there had been no reason to be jealous of Cindy. She wondered if Cindy played the part a little bit more than necessary just to needle her. The realization stunned her.

  “Gin, there were women.” His voice was soft. “I’m only human. And you were married. There were a few I tried to get close to discreetly. I tried. But I could never let myself get to the point of caring. It just
wasn’t going to happen. I wasn’t getting over you just because I was with other women.”

  She tucked her feelings aside, pressing on. “Just forget it. So, after all that, you’re saying Grizz caught you? What did he do?”

  “You don’t want to know.”

  “I’m so tired of hearing that.” Her words were clipped. “You’re the one who’s been telling me I kept my head in the sand. That I’ve never faced the reality of what Grizz was capable of. Well, then tell me! Tell me what he did when he found out you had pulled one over on him. It couldn’t have been too bad. You may have not known he was your father then, but he knew.” She cocked a hip and leveled a smug glance at him. “What did he do to his own son?”

  “He beat the shit out of me with his bare hands and put me in the hospital for two weeks. There. Is that what you wanted to hear?”

  **********

  That brutal night, Grunt was supposed to have dinner with Allen when Grizz called, saying it was imperative that he come to the motel. He looked at his watch. I’ll never make it. He called Allen and told him he’d be late. Not to worry, Allen told him. He was friends with the restaurant’s owner. They would have a table no matter what time they showed up. He’d just wait at the bar.